


There is no Justice Without Truth

by StelaRose



Series: In My Darkness I Found Your Light [1]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Angst, Arranged Marriage, Complicated Relationships, Elia Martell Lives, Essos, Eventual Relationships, Family Issues, Flashbacks, I changed several things of House Rogare for this fic, Internal Conflict, Jaenara and Elia are the same person, Jon Snow is a Targaryen, King Rhaegar Targaryen, Larra in my story is descendant of the Rhoynar, Larra is Lysandro's wife, Love/Hate, Lyanna Stark Lives, Political Alliances, Post-War, Revenge, Westeros, i love Jaime/Brienne so we'll see more of them in future chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:14:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 100,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26686492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StelaRose/pseuds/StelaRose
Summary: Once upon a time there was a dragon and a sun who had to marry. They lived in peace and the sun  thought that the fire that bond them both was enough. But the dragon wasn't looking for fire he was looking for ice. He betrayed the sun leaving her alone with nothing. She waited years for the day she could make the dragon pay for his betrayal.And that day has finally come.*CHAPTER THIRTEEN NOW COMPLETE*
Relationships: Aerys II Targaryen/Rhaella Targaryen, Cersei Lannister/Jaime Lannister (past), Elia Martell/Rhaegar Targaryen, Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth, Larra Rogare/Lysandro Rogare, Lyanna Stark/Rhaegar Targaryen, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Series: In My Darkness I Found Your Light [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2167173
Comments: 302
Kudos: 198





	1. Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone, i hope you like this idea that was in my head for a long time.  
> In this fic obviously there going to be differences, especialy in the relationship Elia-Rhaegar, events and characters that I added to my story.  
> I want this fic to be more than just Elia hurt because Rhaegar dumped her for another. It is for this reason that there are new events that will be revealed in laters chapters and you will find out why Elia has this great resentment that even leads her to elaborate this revenge.  
> I am not going to be mean to Lyanna but if you're looking for a fic where she live happily ever after with Rhaegar this is not the one.  
> Finally i want you to know that english is my second language so if you see something that is terribly written you can mention it in the comments hahaha: D

When Jaenara was ready and looked at herself in the mirror for the first time nine years ago, she felt that she had been reborn from the ashes, as Aerys thought it would be possible if he set the city on fire to kill his enemies, reborn as a majestic Dragon. Life takes unsuspected paths, while the mad king died at the hands of Ser Jaime and for obvious reasons no dragon emerged from his remains she prevailed in the face of adversity. If he saw her now, with such a different appearance, he would undoubtedly think that she is Rhaegar's bastard sister, it's not like he didn't have enough lovers to think otherwise.

_Hair… Eyes… Appearance … Accent… Hair… Eyes… Appearance … Accent… Hair… Eyes… Appearance … Accent…_

"What are you doing?"

"Thinking ... of everything that can go wrong, I waited years for this day and now that it is finally in front of me, I don't know ... I don't know how ... I don't know how to do it, where to start"

Larra walks up to Jaenara and grabs her arm to capture her attention. Looking into her eyes she says “You have been my daughter for ten years. I couldn't have asked for a better one. You know you have my support no matter what you decide. If you decide to travel and fulfill the promise you made to yourself, I will support you”. Her eyes are filled with that maternal tenderness that she always expresses towards Jaenara even though they don't really have the same blood. "But dear, if you decide you don't want to continue with this then with your father we will be happy to spend the rest of our days by your side and give you all the love as we have done so far."

Jaenara does not know what to respond to her words, she only hugs her tightly, she knows that this could be a journey of no return if things do not go the way she hopes but if life has taught her something, is that it is made of difficult decisions and you must choose if you take risks. She begs Larra to understand that she cannot stay, not now that there is finally a chance of finding justice. Despite the fact that life in Essos has been better that the one she had before, Jaenara's chest tightens as she thinks about the past, that day, and how circumstances led her to not be able to save her children, how everything disappeared so fast, she carried them in her womb for nine months and it only took a minute for that eyes to no longer shine. No, she is not going to let those responsible for everything that happened continue to walk through this world as if she and her children had not existed, taking advantage of the fragility of the memory to erase them from the history.

Larra, as a good mother, knows the answer and only hugs her with greater intensity "It will only be a couple of months, after that I will return ... and I’ll be with you until my time in this world is over" Jaenara whispers.

"You speak as if you were going to die before us ..... Honey, you are twenty five years younger than your father and me"

"My children were younger than me and you see how that ended... we do not have the future assured sweet mother"

Larra looks Jaenara in the eye again, eyes that are unable to hide the pain she has felt since the day her children died, eyes that she saw for the first time in that alley in Ragman's Harbor, eyes that are now very different from the old brown color they used to be. “You are ready my dear, Lysandro has taught you everything you need to know about the business…. you are even able to strategize when negotiations turn hostile. You have practiced our language and accent for years, you handle it perfectly. Anyone who had known you before would no longer recognize you. Beside, for the citizens of this world you are a dead person, remember… and one that nobody, at least in King’s Landing, intends to revive” she says with conviction.

“I know” _I know._

  
…..

"I have this appearance for years but still when I look at my face in the mirror I can see the old me ... as if screaming inside of me to let her surface"

“My sun, is normal, after all it has only been 9 years. You spent twenty six years of your life looking dornish; you expected your vision to get used to it just like that…. Not even the color of your eyes is the same”. Lysandro continues marking the numbers that are important to remember in the book that he will give Jaenara to take with her. He has always been a man with a peculiar personality. He was the first person to make her smile but also the first who was able to speak the ugly truth with her when Larra only looked at Jaenara with sad eyes. Lysandro has been the father she never had or at least she does not remember. He accepted her from the very first moment his wife came home with her, just being an unknown young woman who she found in an alley with a wounded body and heart.

"Do you think someone will recognize me?"

He finally looks up and examines her carefully "Someone like whom?"

“Oh… I don't know… maybe my ex-husband who saw my face millions of times. We also talked a lot at the beginning of our marriage, to get to know each other ... I could make a mistake ... talk about the past ... I could ... "

“You are Jaenara Rogare. Daughter of Lysandro and Larra Rogare” walking towards her he says "For the dragon and the wolf to believe the trick of the serpent she must believe her own lie, make it hers, you are not Elia Martell princess of Dorne, that woman died in King’s Landing together with her children and is buried in her homeland” Lysandro takes Jaenara face with both hands, caressing it as if it were the last time he could do it, as if the goodbye was now and not in a couple of days. “You are my daughter and you will represent the interests of your House. You will do business with King Rhaegar Targaryen. You will be a strategist and meet the people close to the king, his family, and act courteously with them to gain their trust” a small mocking smile appears on his face and turning away from Jaenara he comments.

"Now if while you are executing all this you finally decide to end your celibate... what are the names of those horrible women who teach the ladies of westeros how to behave in court? septas? Yeah…you look like one of those now......live a little daughter of mine and if someone finally puts an end to your suffering… well he could definably identify that your curtain” He points to her hair. “…does not match with the......carpet down there….if you get my meaning my sun" he lets out a laugh.

"Father…."

"What...I only speak reality...you should enjoy more....heat things up down there or you'll end up withering my sun….it's for your health....you worry me...your mother and I-"

Jaenara interrupts “Father, you don't need to remind me of mother and you. I know exactly that you both do heat things up… you don't need to mention it” He frowns.

She knows that Lysandro will say something important, something serious, since always before doing so his eyes turn a deep violet and he runs his right hand through his long blond hair, one of his few Valyrian features. They are so different physically and In that sense Larra and Lysandro remind her of her past life, they are different, yes, but once you meet them you realize that they are the complement of each other, they share everything, joys and sorrows, successes and failures, contrary to her past marriage. The few times she remembers Rhaegar and her spending the night in the same bed she used to compare their hands while he slept, she liked to think that what made them different would somehow bring them closer but as the months progressed she felt that the differences became abysmal. And the day they first daughter was named after one of House Martell's most renowned enemies; she knew it would be difficult to regain confidence in him.

"The pain in your memories still consumes you my sun…."

"Father…." Lysandro raises her hand and she knows she must keep quiet.

“What I want to say, my daughter, Jaenara, is that I wish that when you get what you are looking for in Westeros, when you finally feel that justice has been done, you can stop walking in this life alone. Loneliness is a bitter companion; let someone hold your hand. I did it years ago with your mother and life was not easy for both of us, you know, but at the end of the day when the world was falling apart I knew I had a home in my wife”.

After much thought, she whispers "I don't think I've ever had a home like that."

"It is never too late to find it ... ..Or get it back my sun"

She frowns "How would I ever get something back that I never had?"

"Just because you think you didn't have it doesn't mean it didn't exist"

Jaenara quickly gets up from her seat and replies “The night Rhaegar abandoned Elia and her children, that night, he sentenced them. The day Rhaegar took his whore from the North to the Tower of Joy, to Elia's home, that day he humiliated her again as he did in Harrenhal. The afternoon that Rhaegar returned to King’s Landing to command the army into battle at the Trident, that afternoon, he sentenced her again. It was the first day that Elia felt that she could be honest with him about how much hurt he had caused her… about what happened with Aerys after he left” she mutters to herself “Maybe if- ”

"Enough!" Lysandro's commanding voice makes her shut up and swallow her tears. “It's good that you think of Elia as a third person… I don't know why you care so much about whether or not you are ready. You are… you just have to control your anger. If someone mentions Elia and her children or anything from the past whether or not they are true, it must seem that she is a total and complete stranger to you". He focuses on the last remaining book "We should keep practicing."

Jaenara caresses her thigh unconsciously. There are scars from her past that even the strangest elixir in Essos could not erase.

  
…..

Tonight Jaenara feels particularly thoughtful. She assumes it is because it is her last night in Essos with her family.

The home that Larra and Lysandro gave her for the past ten years was very similar to the one she grew up with hers siblings. The sunny climate of Essos bathed her in its light when she saw nothing but darkness and shadows. She spent the first year with them in deep sadness, her body did not respond, she did not eat, she spent whole nights looking at the moon in the night sky wondering if perhaps Larra and Lysandro believed that she should be reunited with their children, since her room was the closest to a deep lake, which for a person like her constantly tortured in her head, who listened the cries and screams of her children even though she knew they were not real, it was tempting to just walk towards it and let herself be carried into the depths.

When she asked Larra one day why having so many other rooms, she was accommodated in that one; she simply answered _"We do not own your destiny”_ and she believes that it was that phrase that made her start to trust them, the fact that they let her make her own decisions. They agreed that to keep her identity a secret she would be they daughter and after months where she went through a process of accepting her new reality and finally decided to leave the room, her new parents were waiting for her with a strange woman who spoke a language that she had never heard. She took her long wavy dark hair, cut it down to her shoulders and applied different liquids on it, by the end of the day her hair had been straightened and was honey colored; her dark eyes were changed for blue ones, as blue as the waters of Tarth; a process that she must repeat every year and that makes her eyes bleed for a full day, the pain is immense, but it is the price she must pay so that no one can recognize her.

Lysandro instructed her to make her accent sound like the daughter of a descendant of Valyria, teaching her enough of the language so that if anyone doubted her knowledge she could prove otherwise. From the first day he took her with him to Rogare Bank so that she would have knowledge of its administration, he even let her make a couple of decisions over the years, when she had acquired enough experience. Larra, for her part, guided her on the path of finding herself; she gave her the courage to face the world again, a world without her children. She take Jaenara to different healers to improve her health, and although at first she did not have much hope that it would give any results, they finally found what they were looking for, and she even increase her weight looking even more unrecognizable.

The ship is still on the ground near the harbor where most of these are built. Employees are working on the final details before taking it to Purple Harbor. It really looks like an imposing fortress, radiating the power of her House. Their coat of arms, an amphiptere, could be seen on top of the ship and painted on each side. Throughout the Essos and Westeros they know of their power, they have one of the banks with the greatest financial capacity and therefore they manage a large part of the mining and port activity.

"What do you think?" Larra interrupts her thoughts.

"It seems to me ...... that it costs a fortune" She smiles.

"A ship worthy of the Rogare heiress" Larra puts her hand on hers and both women share a smile.

  
…..

The way back home is silent; both women know that this will be the last dinner they will share with Lysandro as a family. It's hard to think of goodbyes when the last time Jaenara said goodbye to her loved ones she never saw them again, she still remembers her brother Oberyn during her wedding, the last time she remembers seeing him and the promise that once her marriage was solid and she would have fulfilled the duties expected of her as the wife of the prince of the seven kingdoms she would travel to Dorne to visit him and perhaps he could meet his new nephew or niece, but fate was cruel and she did arrive to Dorne but in a coffin or at least a woman they think is her. How that is no one realized that this body did not belong to Elia Martell. Who wanted to help her disappear? Everything about her last days at King’s Landing is so confusing. For years she has tried to decipher what happened but she only knows the official version that was delivered at that time and since she is clearly not dead, it is not the most reliable version of all.

Maybe on this trip she can finally complete the puzzle.

In a few weeks she will face not only people who knew her in the past but she must also make them believe that she is someone totally different and although she feels confident because she has spent the last nine years of her life being one hundred percent Jaenara Rogare she wonders sometimes…..if she saw her brother, she would be able to pretend and not run into his arms, would he recognize her? And if he did, would he forgive her for never having contacted him? He would understand that she has missed him so much all these years but if she had tried to contact him and someone had discovered her, another war would have broken out?.

"The seamstress arrived with all the dresses this afternoon so everything will be packed tonight for the ship to leave first thing in the morning"

Jaenara sighs "Good"

"You don't seem so overjoyed darling."

"An uncertain future awaits me sweet mother” Both women stop before entering the house. “There is no justice without truth…I have made the words that represent House Rogare my own through the years even though I always knew that just by embracing them as mine I was dishonoring them. This need to make those responsible for the death of my children suffer consumes me like a fire that ravages everything”. Her chest constricted inside. “But on the other hand one of my fears is not being strong enough to face my past. If my life had taken another path....if only someone had fought with me…I couldn't… I…-”

“Elia” Larra hasn't called her by that name in years, not since that weird woman transformed her into Jaenara Rogare, heir of the House Rogare. “One day in that uncertain future of which you speak you will look to the past and you will realize that your decisions led you on the right path. Every action has a consequence, your path will not be easy and it will be full of bitter memories, painful reunions…." She hugs Jaenara tightly. “The only thing that is certain in the future is that with Lysandro we will be there by your side whatever your decisions are. We love you, we are your parents, we took that responsibility the day I brought you home and nothing… Jaenara…. Nothing will ever change that".

"Larra..." Jaenara sobs.

"Shhh...." Both women separate and Larra takes Jaenara's face "Now let's wipe away these tears and enjoy this dinner. You know how Lysandro gets if he sees us sad”.

That night after dinner the family sits around the fireplace. The days in Essos now are hot, but the nights are cold enough to light fire. Jaenara is sitting on the floor with her head in Lysandro's lap as he strokes her hair as if she were a little girl and not a thirty-five-year-old woman.

"The other day the miners found a very interesting kind of gemstone in one of the caves".

"Do you think we should take a sample to a specialist and let him evaluate whether it is possible to transform it into a new metal for future transaction banking?" Whispers Jaenara.

She waited a long moment and didn't get an answer from him so Jaenara straightens up from her position to ask the question again, believing that he did not hear her, but when she looked at his face she realized that his eyes were closed and he was smiling. Jaenara knows that smile very well; he only possesses it when an idea is forming in his head.

"Father" She watches him with suspicious eyes.

Lysandro gets up from his seat "Come on Jaenara I want to show you what they found."

  
…..

The three harbors of Bravos have always been one of the busiest and most impressive in all of Essos. You can observe people of all cultures interacting with each other and once Jaenara felt brave enough to go through them again without the shadows of her past overwhelming her she soon realized that it was one of her favorite places because it does not matter if you were a merchant or a Lord of a great House, all of them coexisted equally at least in that sector, besides that you can find the most unimaginable objects at the best price if you know how to negotiate with the astute essosi merchants. 

Her ship is now anchored in Purple Harbor and the crew that stayed guarding at night told them that there were some bandits who tried enter it at night since they knew that there were many items of value inside to sell on the black market.

She was right after all it is one of the most impressive and striking ships in the harbor and even bandits know it. 

"If you didn't like the ship you would have told me, you know I would have changed it for you my sun"

"Of course I like the ship father"

"So why do you look at it like it's the gates of Valyrian hell”

"I'm nervous ... and sorrowful that's all" Jaenara looks at both of them with sad eyes. She wishes with all her might that they could accompany her on her journey but banks do not handle themselves and she knows very well that if the head of an empire neglects it just a little, ruminators will be waiting to snatch what they can.

"Everything will be fine my sun I promise"

The three hug each other tightly "The impetuous sea brought me to you and now it drives me away ..." Jaenara whispers still hugging them both. It reminds her of her last hug with Oberyn. It's funny how life repeats different moments over and over but it takes time to relate them to each other. Today she feels like that last hug with his brother, with that slight hope in her heart that they will see each other again but also with the uncertainty of the unknown.

"The sea always returns what is not his to take, sweetheart ... you will come back to us because you belong here" Larra answers.

"Jaenara ..." She lifts her head from Lysandro's neck and looks at him intently. "Never forget who you are. You are more than the Rogare heiress or a Princess… Not everything is black or white, life is made of shades and decisions and one day you will look back and realize that you made the right ones."

"Fifteen years ago I would never have planned to harm someone in any way" she whispers.

"I'm not talking about this decision to return to King’s Landing darling."

"What then?”

“Life, my sun, is a path full of battles. I would like to tell you that the suffering of your past is enough and that you will win each of your battles. But that would be a big lie that would only hurt you." He looks at her deeply. “So you must know how to choose your battles, sometimes it is better to lose one to get what you want. Remember this every time you can't find a way out of a problem. Think if it's worth winning or maybe stepping aside and being a spectator will ultimately be more useful to you.” A smile adorns his face. "Let the Wolf and the Dragon tear each other's skin and when they are weak enough….. Play the Game my daughter."

Jaenara tries to watch them until the ship is far enough away that she can't make out their faces, thinking about her father's last words, wondering if she will be able to play the Game this time, if she has what it takes not to get lost in it.  
…..

Larra looks at Lysandro with suspicious eyes as they make their way home. "Why did you tell her that the miners found that ... gemstone when the truth is that you have kept it for years, husband?”.

"If she had known the truth, she would not have accepted it"

"And what is that truth dear husband"

Lysandro says with conviction "I always knew it was not mine ... not really ... I mean, when people have no way to pay, they leave objects in exchange for their debt such as jewels, even property’s, you know the usual but when that man told me what he would give me I didn't understand why he was giving me something so precious that it was a thousand times more valuable than his debt with the bank and for years I hadn't the slightest idea what to do with it." They both stop a few meters from their home. "Life takes unexpected paths, dear wife, the moment our daughter came into our lives I understood why that man gave her to me. He knew that in my future it would be useful to have the gem... or so he said”.

Larra takes her husband's face, bringing him closer to her until they both breathe the same air. "I'm a descendant of Rhoynar so don't try to sell me that Valyrian shit of destiny and prophecies" Lysandro laughs and kisses her passionately thinking that it was her raw honesty that made him fall in love with her years ago.


	2. In the Future You Will Understand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, I want to thank everyone who has read my story...soo glad that people like this idea. :)  
> Second, this chapter is introductory like the first one so it will be more about new characters and events that seem important to understand the story.  
> Third, Chapter three next week.....King's Landing :o

"Does my lady need anything else?"

"No thanks Ghael you can retire for today"

"Thank you my lady"

Jaenara does not remember how many days they have been sailing but she does know that it has been a journey of many hours of internal debate, of looking towards the past and the future, of trying to rebuild her inner strength to know how to face the events that lie ahead. To find answers. The first few days she felt her chest constrict at the thought that the closer the ship got, the closer they were to Kings Landing, the closer she was to seeing the man she once thought to have a family with, the one that she once loved in some way. Then came a stage of acceptance, because she really does not have to feel angst or fear, she has planned every detail, identifying her weaknesses to transform them into strengths and trying to put herself in all possible situations, if there is someone who should fear it is not her, it is the people she once knew. And now when she's so close she feels anxiety. She waits for every sunrise wishing the hours passed, for finally her feet touch the land she once called home.

All the people who accompany her on the ship are new to her except Ghael who is one of her father's "workers", a trustworthy boy once told her, since he is only thirteen years old. She remember the first time she saw him, he was five years old, his father besides being known to be a very cruel man owed a lot of money in one of Lys's brothels and he couldn't find anything better than to go to her father's office at the bank and offer his son in exchange for the payment of his debt. She does not remember seeing Lysandro angrier than that time, her father is a man who does not believe in slavery, each of his workers has the adult age to do so and they do it voluntarily. These jobs are remunerated and even his father supports those who have the greatest difficulty, be it due to a sick relative or other inconvenience.

Lysandro did receive Ghael, he taught him to read and write while he was dedicated to doing small jobs such as running errands or going to visit a needy family where he delivered the donations that Lysandro sent.

As for Ghael’s father, Lysandro did not pay a coin for his debt and a few days later his body was found hanging from the mast of a ship, naked and beheaded. Jaenara thinks she saw relief on Ghael's face and not sadness over the man's death.

His mother and sister needed money to subsist, the only income they had was what their father earned and finally he wasted everything in brothels so they had a large amount of debts. Lysandro decided to pay Ghael a much higher remuneration than anyone else would have.

She still remembers the day an angry ten-year-old Ghael came to Lysandro's office demanding that he was treated differently, that he was not useless and that he could perform the same tasks as any other employee. After Lysandro failed to make him understand that the circumstances of his hiring were different, they reached an agreement and that is how he became Jaenara's assistant.

If she needs to speak to someone, Ghael will personally inform that their presence is required at the bank and also ensure that said person arrives at the meeting with her. If she needs books that are at home while she is at the office he goes for them. And if she needs to spy on someone he's a really stealthy kid. It is for this last reason that she decided to bring him to Kings Landing as it could be useful to her in the future. Although she secretly believes that she got used to his company, it reminds her a bit of Rhaenys, he is a sweet boy but with a strong personality despite the difficult life he lived before arriving with the Rogare.

A knock on the door interrupts Jaenara's thoughts. "Yes?"

"My name is Ezzara my lady; I am one of the ladies who will accompany you at Kings Landing"

The ladies accompanying her are a suggestion from her mother despite Jaenara being opposed to the idea. Unknown people around are a risk, but Larra made her understand that despite the fact that their customs are different from those of Westeros, generally the high born ladies have companions to assist them, so since she didn't have many friends in Essos there weren't many options to choose from so the ladies who accompany her are so unfamiliar to her that she doesn't even remember their names well yet.

Jaenara gets up from her bed and opens the door. There is a woman in her mid-twenties looking at her with a sweet smile on her face. She always knew it would be a bad idea to have ladies to assist her, just by looking at her smile you can tell that it is as false as a warm sunrise on Dragonstone.

"What do you need Ezzara ".

“Just drop by to ask if you need help with any work or if you need my help choosing a dress for your arrival at Kings Landing. It never hurts to try the wardrobe days in advance in case it is necessary to make a change; you know how those things are my lady”. Ezzara says looking not so discreetly at Jaenara's figure.

_She is calling me ... fat?_

"Ezzara… I appreciate your concern but do you think I'm the type of woman who sits down to chat about the latest gossip from other ladies or who worries about things like her dress needing sewing?"

Her smile only wavers for a second "Of course not my lady, everyone talks about her goodness and her great talent in business."

"I don't need you to flatter me Ezzara"

"My lady…."

"I am the future head of a great empire ... if you will be my companion then you must understand that when I need your help I will ask you until then I wish not to be disturbed while I carry out my activities. Jaenara slams the door thinking she has a new task for Ghael.

…..

_"Princess Elia ... Prince Rhaegar wishes to see you"_

_Elia turns her head and sees the guard on duty in her room open the door for her husband. As soon as his eyes are placed on her belly, his eyes shine in the same way they did when she was pregnant with Rhaenys._

_"Wife" Rhaegar keeps his distance from her; nothing is the same since Harrenhal._

_"Husband" He slowly approaches._

_"How have you felt?" Hurt ... Humiliated ... Prisoner._

_“The maester checked me out last week. He confirmed that my pregnancy is healthy so far. There is nothing to worry about. ”Elia has learned to lie about her emotions, she does it so well that she feels no remorse in telling Rhaegar that there is nothing to worry about when the reality is that she thinks day and night if she will survive this pregnancy, if she would even get to know her second child._

_Rhaegar just stares at her as if he has more words to say, but he never does, he always prefers to remain silent and lose himself in her thoughts. Elia believes that perhaps he also thinks that she will not survive although for him it would be sure relief, that way he would have no obstacle to divert his attention to the north where his heart really is._

_"If you want husband, you can feel the baby." She brings Rhaegar's hand to her belly and lets him caress her there so he can feel the oscillations that form when his son moves. He looks up and smiles, something very rare in her husband and that is rarely seen, most of the time it occurs in the presence of Rhaenys._

_"We can go out to the garden my lady….it is a sunny day in Dragonstone it would be-". Elia removes Rhaegar's hand and looks out the window to appreciate the few rays of the sun._

_"My door will always be open for you if it is about the pregnancy, you are the father of my children and you have rights." Elia takes a deep breath to avoid tears. "But let's not pretend that we are more than two unfortunate people who are forced to stay together."_

_"Elia-"_

_She raises her voice “All I ask is that you be discreet about it. Your mother is a sweet woman and has always treated me with respect but everyone knows that the king had his lovers among his maids”._

_"I am not my father"_

_"Aren't you…like him? Finally, Elia looks at Rhaegar and sees sadness on his features. Long ago that reaction on his part would have led them both to lie down on his bed and Elia would stroke Rhaegar's hair while he told her what trouble him. Today, just seeing Rhaegar's face makes her heart clench and she wonders if maybe the people around her are right if she is just a sickly princess who came to the throne thanks to her mother's cunning._

_Rhaegar looks at her one last time before walking away and mutters "In the future you will understand"_

In the end, Elia had no future, nor did she ever understand the reason for her husband's actions.

…..

Jaenara likes to walk around the ship at night when most of the crew has retired to their cabins so that she can calmly appreciate the sea, breathe new air while thinking about everything and nothing at the same time.

A thunderous noise to her right instinctively makes her hide behind some barrels that were near her. It is a reflex action that after all these years she still cannot correct, whenever she is alone at the slightest sign that something could be wrong, her heart flutters and it is as if an adrenaline pump were suddenly exploding inside her. Sometimes it just comes out as a kind of panic, she just freezes for a second and then her mind returns to reality but in cases like these where the place is unknown and Larra or Lysandro is not there to remind her that she is safe, It may seem like a horrible feeling, like you are being stalked and it reminding her of being locked in the dark.

As she takes a deep breath trying to calm her nerves, she realizes that the noise she heard was only some crew members who were carrying trunks. At a time like this she realizes that she is still so traumatized by her past even if someone knocks on the door louder than normal it makes her be on the alert. The war for the throne changed her forever but even before her children were killed things were not going well for her. 

The dinner to which Aerys called her was another turning point for her, she fought back, for the first time she responded to the insults of the mad king and although it cost her the wound on her thigh it was worth it. Jaenara believes that this was the moment when she realized how little valued she was and the image that the rest of the people had of her as if she was not worthy of her title, as if imagining that she would become the queen of the seven kingdoms was unimaginable. The fire inside her ignited and once it spread through her veins not even when her thigh bled from the wound inflicted with the king's sword stopped her strength.

After that day she saw the respect in the eyes of the knights who witnessed the scene, after that day no one in the Red Keep thought again that Elia Martell was a weak princess.

After all the Martells are _Unbowed, Unbent and Unbroken_

…..

"It is a beautiful dragon egg my lady"

“My father gave it to me the night before boarding. He said the miners found it in one of the new caves they are exploring. ".

“My mother used to tell my sister and me dragon stories when we were little. She used to say that they traveled to have their eggs in Essos because they wanted them to be born in freedom, away from the Targaryens”.

Jaenara looks at Ghael as he sits cross-legged on the floor next to her where they both examine the petrified dragon egg carefully. Its color is an imposing deep blue; she does not remember seeing a color as beautiful as this.

When Lysandro gave it to her he told her that it could be useful in Kings Landing since in addition to being very valuable to the Targaryen family they were valuable in general to anyone who knew about them and she might have something to negotiate with in case a situation got out of hand.

"Why would they want to escape from them, they have been faithful to that family for years."

The boy looks at her with eyes full of wisdom “They were faithful to them at first my lady but then they began to treat them like some kind of pet that had to be locked up. Over the years the Targaryens did not understand that a dragon is a companion that decides to work with you not a beast that must be chained. That was why they were able to tame them in the first place, the people of Valyria, because they understood that the dragon chooses its rider, its life partner".

"How do you know so much about dragons Ghael?" Jaenara says thoughtfully.

He blushes "Since my lord taught me to read, I spend every day in my spare time reading in the library." He quickly adds "But I promise I asked him permission and he said it was okay."

Jaenara smiles, he has always been curious and she knew that he spent time in the vast library of his home but apparently she underestimated him, he really is a fast and good reader. "And what other knowledge did you acquire about them?"

"The last dragon was female but was born sick and could not fly." His eyes shine "Perhaps this is one of her eggs, my lady, she managed to lay five and it was never known what became of them." He says excited.

"It is unlikely that this egg reached Essos from Westeros Ghael, even more so if the miners found it in a cave" Jaenara whispers.

The boy turns his gaze to the dragon egg and replies “It is said that Aegon lll decided to end the life of the female dragon because it reminded him of the past…of his mother, who was eaten by Sunfyre when the dance of dragons occurred, then nothing was known about the remaining five eggs”. Ghael looks back at Jaenara. "Perhaps, my lady, the eggs are also looking for someone to accompany them."

“Eggs don't move by themselves Ghael. Besides, he's petrified, I think it's just a coincidence that they found him at this moment. "

Ghael smiles “You are right my lady I think sometimes I am very passionate about a subject. Also in Essos there were dragons in the past, so maybe this egg is millions of years old. ”He blushes again.

Jaenara heard many times about dragons in the past even Rhaegar referred to his children as his little dragons, other times he only told stories of his ancestors but Rhaegar's favorite phrase once he knew that Jaenara could not conceive his precious third dragon it was _"The dragon must have three heads."_

How she hated her husband every time she heard him say that. He finally did get his three dragons but two of them perished like the dragons in the Dragon Pit did.

…..

The first thing Jaenara sees as the ship approaches King’s Landing is the Red Keep. Nothing has really changed in the structural appearance; only the person sitting on the iron throne is different in some way. This morning she decided to accept the help of her ladies to choose the dress which is made of beautiful golden silk with black applications which gives it the right air of sweet and fierce at the same time. This opportunity helped her to get to know them better and discovered for example that she still hates Ezzara and that she is right to keep her under Ghael's watch. On the contrary, her second lady is named Ihrra and she, unlike the first, is much more honest and has real warmth in her features that made Jaenara consider that for the moment she has gained a bit of her trust.

"Has my lady ever visited Kings Landing?"

"No Ihrra, it's the first time." The true first time Jaenara arrived at Kings Landing, the fear of the unknown overwhelmed her. She wanted to fulfill the expectations placed on her. Years later she realizes that the only expectations that matter are yours.

“I find it exciting to discover new lands. I had never left Essos on such a long journey”. Ihrra is at least five years younger than Ezzara and still has a bit of that naivety, that confidence that people will do the right thing. Jaenara just wishes that she doesn't make mistakes in Kings Landing like hanging out with the wrong people. She hopes she doesn't get caught in the middle of a game she doesn't yet understand.

“Don't get too excited, Ihrra, I've heard it's not a really nice place. The Targaryens have had very poor management of their wealth in recent years. That is why we are finally here. I am the last resort before the other Houses realize they don't have enough to defend themselves. A war is expensive and if you can’t afford it… you are a dead man".

Jaenara turns around and walks to her room. What Rhaegar does not imagine is that he will have his own enemy under his roof, feed her, give her his hospitality and do business with her believing that he is saving his precious kingdom, his legacy, when what he is really doing is the opposite.

Alliances between Houses are very normal in times of war. She thinks it is time for House Rogare to make new friends in Westeros.

…..

"A ship from Essos has anchored in the harbor, your grace" Arthur comments approaching the king of the seven kingdoms who is in front of the window with his eyes lost in the horizon. Seeing no answer, ask "What’s troubles you old friend?"

"I question my decisions, Arthur"

"I am not a man forged to rule, you already know that, but I am a man who knows strategies to win a battle and this is at least the only definitive solution to the problems that the kingdom is going through."

"A marriage between House Targaryen and High Garden could have bought me more time."

"You would win Viserys' fury if you forced him into such a union."

“I learned my lessons in the past Arthur. I would not force Viserys or Dany into a marriage they do not want just because as king I have failed. "

"Mistakes are lessons old friend." Rhaegar has heard Arthur say that so many times that he can even anticipate when he will give him that advice.

"Who did you send for Lady Rogare?"

Arthur's face has an amused smile. "Jaime Lannister"

Both men smile, nothing will bother the Hand of the King more than seeing his son receive Jaenara Rogare, the most powerful person on these lands right now and on whom the future of King’s Landing depends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked.


	3. Wine-Poached Figs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this chapter will be loved or hated hahaha, but I don't see Jaenara arriving at King's Landing and feeling nothing ... just being the badass woman everyone expects, don't get me wrong, she will be, but at least in this chapter I wanted to represent the pain ..... the suffering .... of her and other characters.  
> I hope you feel that you are reading about real people even if they are fictional characters ... with feelings, hopes and failures ... and that they are more complicated than they seem.  
> PS: The meaning of the phrase in High Valyrian is: The night is dark and full of terrors.
> 
> If you want you can leave a comment :)

Jaenara feels as if the ground beneath her feet radiates energy and each step fills her with vibrations throughout her body. She knows there are people waiting for her at the harbor, but she cannot clear her vision and the images are blurred in her mind. She cannot focus properly.

But she sees one thing clearly; the sigil of House Targaryen. Her maids walk after her while she tries to anchor her thoughts to reality so she begins to give instructions to the ship's employees who are unloading all her belongings to occupy her mind.

She hears her maids stop in their walk so Jaenara assumes they are in front of whoever has come to welcome her. She averts her gaze to that person with what she hopes is a kind expression.

In front of her is a young man with golden hair and green eyes dressed in impressive white armor with touches of gold in some parts. It is inevitable not to recognize him. She spoke to him a couple of times in the past especially after Aerys decided she should be confined indefinitely with her children to ensure Dorne's cooperation. He was always nice to her and even offered to go find the maester to heal her after Aerys damaged her thigh.

Ser Jaime Lannister looks at her carefully before bowing to greet her.

"Lady Jaenara" He stretches his hand towards her and gives her a smirk.

“Ser Jaime" she gives him her hand for him to kiss it at the same time that she realizes her mistake, it is assumed that she has never visited Westeros so she should not be able to identify him just by his appearance. She quickly adds "The Golden Lion of House Lannister." She smiles at him with what she hopes is a flirtatious smile.

It seems to have the expected effect because Ser Jaime has an even wider smile once he lets go of her hand.

"Lady Jaenara… the fierce heiress of House Rogare"

"I guess we are both famous in foreign lands Ser"

Jaime offers his arm to Jaenara to walk with her towards the waiting carriage. "There is a lot of talk about your name these days in the Red Keep"

"And what is said so much about me?"

"You want the official version or the one spoken in the hallways my lady."

"Both of them"

They stop at the side of the carriage while the employees and maids organize the trunks. Jaime looks at Jaenara as if evaluating his answer.

"Officially it is said that you are the only heir to House Rogare, a businesswoman like your father and that you are a guest of the King due to the interest of both houses to unite Essos and Westeros" Jaime brings his face closer to Jaenara as if he is telling her a secret. She plays along and comes close too. "Unofficially ... it is said that if you don't do business with Rhaegar we are screwed" He whispers.

Jaenara laughs out loud. "Well, I'm glad to hear that both versions have some reality."

Ghael walks up to them and interrupts their conversation "My lady".

"Ghael, I present to you Ser Jaime Lannister, Ser Jaime, he is Ghael one of the people I trust the most" Whatever Jaenara expected from the greeting of both was definitely not Jaime ruffling Ghael's hair as if he were a little boy and Ghael blushing like he'd been in the sun for hours.

Jaenara looks at Jaime with an amused face; he just shrugs his shoulders and replies "I have a younger brother”.

Ghael stutters a bit when he finishes his greeting with Jaime "My lady ... your horse is saddled and ready for the trip to the Red Keep."

"Thanks Ghael"

"Unfortunately Ser Jaime I will have to decline the carriage" Jaenara takes the reins of the horse that Ghael brings "But feel free to use it if you wish"

Jaime puts his hands on his heart with a dramatic expression "Oh you hurt me my lady; I bored you so much that you want to lock me in the carriage?"

Jaenara climbs on her horse and looks at him from above, arching an eyebrow "On the contrary, a minute of silence would be good for you and your ego."

Jaime laughs walking towards his horse "I look forward to the moment when my father finally meets you my lady."

…..

On the way to the Red Keep, Jaenara realizes that the structures of the houses in the city have improved a lot compared to what she remembers from the time when Aerys reigned. Although people still come to ask for money when they see a carriage of a lord or a lady because since they entered the most populated part of the city it has been difficult for them to move forward due to the accumulation of people on their way.

“They know that the Rogare family owns a bank…. In the streets they didn't talk about anything other than your arrival, my lady” says Ser Jaime next to her.

"In Essos it is difficult to receive a good education, so my parents sent me to my uncle with whom I spent a large part of my childhood, for the knowledge that I acquired in my time with him about King’s Landing I imagined that it was a ... different place"

"With a smell of shit and people living on the streets?"

Jaenara looks at him and smiles at his vocabulary "Something like that"

“Rhaegar has made many changes since he assumed the crown, he has improved the housing, the structures of the city such as sewers, he has implemented changes that have allowed women and children to be more protected and lately he has tried to improve the dynamics of jobs so that the people don't have to go out to _this_ ”.

A little girl who is apparently blind stumbles on Jaenara's horse, she stops with the intention of asking if she is okay and for a moment when she sees her she is transported to the past and no longer sees the girl, she sees Rhaenys. Her heart flutters in her chest and she feels a cold run through her body. She tries to return to reality but the more she observes the girl the more she loses herself in her. In her mind she knows that it is not Rhaenys, so with a voice that she hopes does not sound shaky she says "Are you okay dear?"

The little girl whispers yes at the same time that the one who seems to be her older brother, due to the similarity of their features, takes her hand, hugs her and whisper something in her ear that Jaenara cannot understand. He looks up at her and when he realizes who she is, he hurries to say while bowing "I'm very sorry my lady, I was buying fruit and I let go of my sister's hand."

_If the world hadn't been so cruel they could be Aegon and Rhaenys._

"No problem, just try not to lose sight of this beauty next time" Jaenara gets off her horse and kneels in front of the little girl, caressing her face. "It seems to me that here we have a naughty little girl" The little girl giggles while her hand caresses Jaenara's face back.

It has been years since such small hands have touched Jaenara's face; one of the last times was when Rhaenys asked her to read a book to her before her nap. Sometimes they ended up asleep next to each other and when she woke up she felt Rhaenys beautiful hands on her face.

How she missed that feeling.

Jaenara turns her gaze towards her brother and sees that even though he told her that he was buying fruits, he is not carrying anything in his hands. "If you want you can go get the fruit and I can stay looking after your sister".

The little boy blushes "My lady ... I didn't have enough coins to buy the fruit that my sister likes"

"And what fruit do you like my dear"

"Orange" she exclaims.

"Then we can't leave you without them." Getting up she gestures for Ghael to come closer and asks him to go get some coins.

"Ser Jaime I hope the King is not very impatient for my arrival"

He just smiles and shrugs nonchalantly commenting "Sure if we stray a bit he won't notice"

On the way she couldn't stop looking at both children. Her mind traveled to a world where they were Rhaenys and Aegon and together they wandered the streets of Kings Landing in search of fruit.

Elia wished that in the future they could have governed with justice and respect for others but also with love, and for that, she would have wanted to teach them to be better than she or their father.

…..

Jaenara walks with her head held high through the corridors of the Red Keep in the company of her ladies-in-waiting, Ghael, Jaime Lannister and some guards who accompany them. Each breath confronts her with the unmistakable smell of the cold corridors of the Keep and makes her remember the millions of times that she walked through them but also of that day, the day her past life ended.

She can see that there are a lot of people running around with different foods in the direction of the kitchen. As she expected Rhaegar must have arranged a welcome dinner for her.

"Nervous my lady"

"Mmm" she replies nonchalantly.

Jaime laughs and says "Where is your mind, Lady Jaenara"

She smiles "I'm sorry Ser Jaime, I am a fan of ancient architecture and the Red Keep seems to me a really impressive structure" she says hoping that he believes her lie.

"Well my lady I think you are the only one who would think something like that of a place as depressing as this."

"I said the structure was impressive not that I found it to be a homey place"

"Touché my lady”

When they are near the throne room, Jaenara stops in her tracks causing Ezzara who was walking behind her to collide with her back. Her mind is transported back ten years and she remembers a voice that she cannot identify telling her to hurry that they must get out of the Keep before Robert's supporters come for her. She remembers that this person was practically dragging her as her legs could barely hold her up. It is not a new vision for her. Sometimes she dreams of that, what is new and it makes her stop is that now she also manages to remember that the person who carries her made them hide from Jaime Lannister when he was leaving the Great Hall.

Why would a man who was supposed to be saving her from Robert's soldiers want to hide from Jaime Lannister? She knows that Jaime, despite being an arrogant man and who tends to say exactly what he thinks without any filter, is an honorable knight, one of the few who truly embraces his vows and lives by them. She doesn't think he would have hurt her in the past. He even went to visit her a couple of times at Maegor's Holdfast where Aerys kept her confined with her children and brought her news of what was happening outside after Rhaegar's march to the battle of the Trident.

She feels a hand on her arm and realizes that it is Ghael who is trying to get her attention but she cannot hear what he is saying; She also sees Jaime Lannister asking something and Ihrra and Ezzara behind them looking at her with different expressions on their faces.

"I'm really sorry... when I was little I had a bad experience and that makes me a bit claustrophobic. I have learned to handle it over the years, but very closed and dark places sometimes remind me of it"

"My lady" Apparently her mind is returning to reality as she now hears Ghael's voice more clearly. He also takes her hand affectionately and says “Bantis zōbrie issa se ossȳngnoti lēdys”

She takes a deep breath “You're right Ghael. But not for that reason should we let them beat us"

Looking up at the others she says with conviction "We have made the king wait too long, it is time for me to reach my destination."

The doors to the throne room swing wide once they are back on their way. The first thing her gaze meets with is the king of the seven kingdoms. The years have been generous with Rhaegar; he looks exactly the same as she remembers him only that his features are those of an older man, a more mature one. His gaze meets hers and for a split second she sees surprise in his eyes but as Jaenara approaches the throne that surprise is replaced by curiosity. Next to the king is a woman of about twenty-seven years old, it is difficult to mistake her Stark features, dark hair, deep eyes and white skin like the northern snow. She has a kind smile on her face but Jaenara has become an expert over the years at reading under people's masks and can tell that the queen is not so happy with her arrival.

As they practiced it on the ship, Ihrra bows and introduces Jaenara "Your grace, Lady Jaenara Rogare, heir of Lysandro and Larra Rogare, sent on behalf of the Rogare Bank of Essos."

Rhaegar rises from the throne taking Lyanna's hand and says “Welcome to Kings Landing lady Rogare. I hope that the trip was not very exhausting”. Looking at Lyanna he says "With my dear wife we prepared a banquet in her honor to celebrate the possible union of our houses”.

“It was an interesting trip, your grace. I appreciate the hospitality that has been given to me so far in the kingdom" she replies with a small bow. "I hope we can reach an agreement that maintains good relations between our houses and therefore our continents."

They both look at each other evaluating the meaning of their words. Jaenara knows that to have access to Kings Landing's finances, she must reach an agreement with Rhaegar and his Hand, but that doesn't mean she'll make it easy for him.

Jaenara looks away at Lyanna. “Queen Lyanna, I must say that I have heard a lot about the woman who was able to steal the king's heart. I hope we can get to know each other better during my stay in the realm” she says with a smile that she hopes is sweet and kind, trying to be indifferent to the story behind her marriage to Rhaegar. The smile on Lyanna's face falters for a second, but then years of practice in hiding her true emotions make her look flattered by the compliment.

"Of course Lady Jaenara at dinner I hope we can get to know each other and you can also meet our son, Prince Jon"

_Jon ... Aegon's replacement..._

"I would like nothing more than to meet your family." Looking at Rhaegar she says "I have also heard a lot about your siblings, your grace"

“Viserys and Daenerys are on their way to King’s Landing. They both traveled to Dragonstone a few weeks ago and a storm delayed their arrival but they will be here very soon" When Rhaegar smiles you can see small wrinkles in his eyes.

The king gestures to the man near the throne "Lady Jaenara, I would like to introduce you to the Lord Commander of the royal guard Ser Arthur Dayne"

Arthur Dayne was a childhood friend and although they did not have the same level of friendship as she and Ashara, she always considered him a fair and kind man until Jaenara came to Kings Landing and realized that even a man like him was forced to look away from the atrocities Aerys was committing. It is Arthur's greatest flaw, the blind loyalty he gives to those he serves. Although she also remembers that he had another defect.

Misinterpreting the vows he swore.

"Welcome to Kings Landing my Lady"

“Sword of the Morning….. I hope one day I can see you in action… some training perhaps?”

Arthur smiles and nods “When you have time let me know…. Although I warn you, my lady, the training sessions are at dawn"

"I'm a morning person Ser Arthur." Looking at him she says “Besides, I think I can teach you a thing or two in archery. Although I warn you, Ser, I'm very good with a bow in my hand” Jaenara winks at him and smiles back.

Jaenara hears Jaime Lannister laugh a little next to her for her audacity and when she looks at the king and queen they both have different expressions, while Lyanna seems puzzled by her words Rhaegar seems even more curious about her personality.

After exchanging a few more words, the king invites them to come to the Great Hall where he also mentions that she will meet his Hand Tywin Lannister.

…..

When Jaenara enters the Great Hall she sees a table full of ostentatious food and wine and next to that table is the man she must impress if she wants her plans to be carried out. Tywin Lannister.

"Lady Jaenara"

"Lord Tywin" He takes her hand and kisses it in greeting. Of all the times someone has greeted her this way at King’s Landing or Essos, this is the first time she has felt a chill. Tywin is a really disturbing man especially if the rumors about him and his actions are true.

"I hope your arrival at King's Landing brings benefits for all parties involved”.

"It is my greatest wish my lord".

To her left she hears the footsteps of female shoes and knows that it is Lyanna who went looking for Jon. The boy is not at all as she imagined, his features are completely northern, there is not a single drop of Targaryen in him, he also seems very shy and he can barely look Jaenara in the eyes when he greets her. Despite her hatred for the boy's parents, she can't help but think about the possibility that he might be somehow involved in the whole situation and it's not a pleasant feeling. She would never hurt him, at least not intentionally, or she would be no better than the man who murdered her children.

When Jaenara imagined Rhaegar's family as he rebuilt his life once her children and she were not present in it, she imagined it completely different from what she sees now during dinner, on the outside they seem like a normal couple, Rhaegar and Lyanna are affectionate but in a way that is respectful to others, both are attentive with Jon and with the guests, which in this case is just Jaenara and Tywin but if you pay attention, as Jaenara does, you may notice little things such as that it is Lyanna who is looking for Rhaegar's hand or smiles in his direction from time to time and he is never the one who initiates a loving action or that Rhaegar tries to include her in all conversations seeking her advice, but rarely does Lyanna knows for sure what is being talked about because she only nods or smiles giving a neutral response pretending to know the subject.

They really aren't the perfect marriage Jaenara envisioned all these years and a marriage fragmented by lack of communication is easy to manipulate separately.

“Queen Lyanna” the woman fixes her dark eyes on Jaenara “It is my knowledge that these are happy times for House Stark. Congratulations".

The woman looks at her with suspicious eyes but smiles "Excuse me lady Jaenara but the truth is that I do not know the reason for the congratulations"

"Oh! Maybe it's still a secret, I am sorry…. It's just that the raven that Lady Catelyn sent to my house was a while ago, I thought that by then the news of her new niece or nephew would be known”. Lyanna Stark's face shows the surprise that Jaenara expected, after all, she knows that Eddard Stark never forgave her for the death of their brother and father. They hardly speak at the events in which both are present, although Jaenara suspects that it is more than anything to maintain the appearances of a united family in front of the Houses.

Lyanna tries to recover quickly from the news and says "I was not aware that my brother and sister-in-law were close to you”.

“I met Lady Catelyn and Lord Stark on a visit years ago with my father to Winterfell. They were both very kind to us and since then we have maintained communication" It feels good to bury the knife even deeper in Lyanna, you can see in her face the pain caused by not having a close relationship with her family but Jaenara sees another emotion in her. Longing. Perhaps she remembers the years when they were both young and inseparable. Perhaps remorse for all the damage she caused is present in the young queen's daily life.

"If my sister-in-law sent you a raven informing you of her pregnancy personally, then she must hold you in high regard”. 

_Catelyn Stark would never send me a raven reporting her pregnancy but my father's spies would. Too bad you have no way of knowing that little detail._

Jaenara smiles at Lyanna while taking a sip of wine from her glass “She is a strong woman who knows how to lead. I think that's what brought us together in some way”

"She is" The more they talk about the subject, the more difficult it is for Lyanna to hide the unhappiness of the breakdown of her relationship with her brother.

Rhaegar interrupts the conversation by asking for dessert to be served.

As the maids begin to clear the empty plates Jaenara turns her gaze to Tywin Lannister. The man is also looking at her, but it seems more as if he is analyzing her every movement, her gestures. It's as if he somehow realized that she has more plans than just doing business with them. The old lion has always been an intelligent man but also a cruel one who does not stop at anything in order to get what he wants.

She raises her glass and nods trying to appear polite, in response Tywin just nods and a slight smile appears on his face. A smile that definitely doesn't give Jaenara a good feeling.

When Jaenara thanks the maid who delivers her dessert, she almost chokes on the second sip of wine she was taking. _Wine-Poached Figs_. The dessert is typical of Dorne; it is not prepared anywhere else because figs can only be grown in that type of climate. The times she ate them at Dragonstone or Kings Landing were few and only because her husband took the trouble to bring them from Dorne to the capital. As the boat trip takes at least a month to arrive, the figs went through a drying process before being shipped.

She puts the glass with shaking hands on the table and prepares to eat dessert. She could make up an excuse like she's allergic to figs, but these are precisely the kinds of tests that Jaenara knew could happen at Kings Landing. And she can be many things but she is not a coward.

Taking the first bite she feels her stomach turn over and to distract herself she comments on how delicious the dessert is and how she has never tasted it before. When her gaze meets Rhaegar's, it's like going back in time. His violet eyes look sad despite the smile on his face when he comments that it is one of his favorite desserts and that he actually has a kind of greenhouse where, after years of trying, he was able to find the formula to grow the fruit in King’s Landing.

“It seems like a lot of work just for a couple of figs your grace” she replies trying not to stutter.

He simply replies "They are worth it."

Jaenara has no answer for that so she just keeps savoring the dessert as if her life depended on it.

…..

Once dinner is over and their first meeting is scheduled for the following afternoon, everyone says goodbye to retire for the night.

Jaenara walks hurriedly through the corridors of the Red Keep with Ghael and the guard who will indicate her room, once they are in front of the door she says goodbye to both of them wishing them good night. The interior of her room is very different from how she remembered it, although ten long years have passed after all. She was wrong when she saw the Keep from afar on the ship, on the outside it is still the same structure but inside everything is very different and not only in appearance, the people who inhabit it look much calmer than when Aerys was on the throne . It pains her to admit that Rhaegar seems to be a better king than his father in many ways.

Jaenara sits on the bed, clinging to her, her hands seem numb; she feels that they tremble while her vision is clouded by tears when she remembers that dinner with her husband.

_Throughout dinner, Elia has felt a kind of disconnection, it is as if she and her husband even being in the same room felt separated by kilometers. Each of them is sitting at one end of the large table and it feels so difficult to talk to each other, to find a common theme._ _Although they've been married for a month, they've only spent maybe two weeks together due to Rhaegar's responsibilities lately, so they don't really have much to talk about._

_"Shall I bring dessert to the table, my lord?"_

_"Yes thank you Anna" Before the maid leaves to get dessert Rhaegar rushes to say "Anna?"_

_"Yes, my lord"_

_"After dessert I would like you to go for the rest of the dinner" Looking towards the guards he says "I want to be alone with my wife"_

_Once all the staff has left, Elia looks at Rhaegar with curious eyes, perhaps her husband felt this disconnect too._

_What makes it even more difficult to communicate with him are the opposites that both are in their personalities, where Elia is a great conversationalist, Rhaegar is very introverted, he prefers to lose himself in his books and most of the time Elia wonders why they draw so much attention from her violet-eyed dragon._

_Anna returns with two dessert plates of figs._ _Wine-Poached Figs_ _to be exact and Elia's favorite dessert since she discovered the fruit at home._

_She looks at Rhaegar biting her lip to prevent tears from falling, it may seem like a simple dessert but for her it is more than that, for her it means Home, even if it is a small part of it._

_Both newlyweds carefully look at each other before Rhaegar breaks the bubble they were in. "Oberyn told me ... it's your favorite dessert."_

_Taking a deep breath, Elia responds, "My mother used to do it when we were little."_

_Rhaegar gives her a small smile "If so, I can't wait to try it my lady"_

_Before Rhaegar can take a bite, Elia gets up from the table, takes her plate, and sits next to him. Once she is comfortable in the chair, ask "May I?" indicating his plate._

_From the expression on his face, Elia is sure he doesn't understand what she means, so as she puts both desserts on one plate, she tells him “When we were little Oberyn and I fought over little things, but for us at that age they were of great importance. Like, for example, whose turn it was to use our mother's sword that we had stolen" Elia smiles as she arranges the table in such a way that the dessert is in the middle of both "Every time we got angry about things like this, our mother made this dessert and gave it to us in a single plate, so that we could learn to share" Elia looks up and is surprised to see with the attention that her husband looks back at her “Over the years I realized that there is something really beautiful in sharing dinner or food with a person you love… it teaches you to appreciate the little moments in life, the joy of having that person in your life". She says whispering the last part._

_Taking his spoon, Rhaegar responds, "No one taught me a lesson like that in the past ... but I think it's never too late to learn."_

Jaenara falls sobbing next to the luxurious bed she will sleep in during her stay at Kings Landing, her hands squeezing the soft fabric of the bedspread trying to stop the pain inside her. She knew this trip would be difficult, but she never imagined that something as small as dessert would make her heart ache, that she couldn't stop the sound of her sobs. She knows that deep down it is not the dessert, it is not seeing Rhaegar again or seeing the woman who now has the life she should have lived; it is what that dessert means. It is the fact that Rhaegar, despite all the damage that he caused, still remembers her.

She saw it in his eyes when their gazes met; she saw that he still remembered that first dinner where she shared the story behind those figs.

…..

The fire roars uncontrollably in the fireplace in Rhaegar's room. It seems that the flames want to communicate with him in some way but it has been years since he stopped believing in prophecies and premonitions or at least stopped interpreting them.

All the years that he spent following the destiny that according to him was written on the scrolls, the destiny that he had to fulfill to restore peace to Kings Landing after the great battle was over, each and every one of them were years lived in a lie.

Thousands of people suffered for his actions and the price he had to pay was the loss of his two little dragons and his first wife. Elia.

_The battle of the trident changed everything._

He feels his bedroom door open slowly and knows who it is without having to turn to look.

"What are you doing?" Lyanna stands next to him and together they look at the flames.

“I'm just trying to clear my mind before the meetings tomorrow. You know Tywin is uncomfortable with this alliance”.

Lyanna takes his hand in hers and squeezes it. "Tywin is uneasy because he knows that this alliance will let the other Houses know that the mines are running out of gold. That makes him lose power”.

"If Jaenara Rogare does not do business with us that will matter little" He turns to look at her "They will eat us alive".

"Are you sure it was a good decision to bring a woman from other lands?"

"She seemed like a smart woman to me"

“That is exactly what concerns me, Rhaegar. She is too smart. She is also arrogant, which is to be expected because she has been raised to run an empire. But I feel like she has an interest beyond doing business with you. If she has investigated the situation at King’s Landing as much as we have sent spies to Essos in recent months to find out about her, then she must know that the situation is critical”. Her face darkens. “I'm sure she was testing me in some way at dinner when she talked about my brother and Catelyn. You have to be very blind not to realize that my brother hates me”. She whispers the last part and her eyes fill with tears.

Rhaegar draws her to him and hugs her trying to ease a bit of the pain he knows she feels every time she sees her brother. He is courteous to her and asks about Jon and the family, but deep down Lyanna is right, you have to be blind not to see that Ned Stark, even being the good and honorable man that everyone describes, has never been able to forgive his sister. And Rhaegar doesn't blame him, after all these years he still can't forgive himself for believing that the scrolls and books had the answers. The loss of all those who died to complete a prophecy that never came to be. He still can't forgive himself for not being in time to save his family. He still cannot forgive himself for misinterpreting his dream and believing that the battle of the trident was lost to him.

He still remembers the moment when he found his children, or at least what was left of them, when he entered that room.

He still remembers finding Elia's body with her disfigured face and almost shattered body on the damp earth.

The days at Kings Landing are mostly sunny, but every time the rain falls and the smell of damp earth reaches his nose, Rhaegar locks himself in the greenhouse where he has grown the figs and allows himself to be enveloped by the memory of his family until the agony of loss consumes him completely.


	4. Red Roses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update ... to make a long story short, I went to the salon this week because I wanted to be like Dua Lipa and came home with frizzy orange hair :( ... I don't know how to fix it because I don't want to damage it even more, so let's say It has not been the best week.  
> Hope you like the chapter ... if you thought Tywin Lannister was too quiet ... well, let's just say he won't be anymore.

The rays of the morning sun make Jaenara's eyes finally open, she has been awake for hours but her eyes are swollen, her neck is sore, she feels her legs are asleep due to the kneeling position where she remained all night. Her parents warned her how difficult it would be to return to King’s Landing especially the first few days until she adjusted to being in the same place where she suffered so much in the past; but imagining it and living it are different things.

How she misses her parents. Larra's sweet voice when she woke her up in the morning and the delicious food she prepared or Lysandro's humor that managed to lift her spirits even in her worst moments.

Jaenara begins to move from her position on the ground trying to stretch her muscles. As she walks around the room, she realizes that it is much larger than she thought; she even has a small table with paper and a quill in case she needs it.

Through the window she can see a privileged view of the gardens of the Keep and therefore the greenhouse that Rhaegar spoke of yesterday at dinner. The structure is right in front of her room as if she wants to make fun of her by rubbing in her face that it exists, it is real and it will not go anywhere. She angrily moves away from the window, she must not let this kind of thing affect her in any way, her father warned her that her temperament often makes her vulnerable to others.

As she already woke up at dawn, she decides that she will start the day by taking Arthur's word about training. So she goes in search of the clothes that she used at home when she practiced archery and is sure that Larra suggested that she pack. She started practicing archery around her second year at Essos, one day she saw Larra practice and thought how in childhood she had always wanted to train with her brothers but her mother never allowed it, her reason was that she had to prepare in other activities to be a future wife of a great lord but Jaenara knew that deep down it was that her mother was afraid that something would happen to her since she always had weak health.

Larra, unlike her mother, accepted her from the first moment and gave her all her knowledge about archery. Within a few years she was as good as Larra and they even went hunting many times in the forest where they would get lost for a couple of days, especially when Jaenara felt overwhelmed by her thoughts and needed to escape from everything.

Once she's ready she feels like her eyes are still swollen so she goes in search of water to try to reduce the inflammation a bit when she notices that something glows in one of the drawers where her employees have stored her clothes.

When she gets closer and opens it, she realizes that it is the dragon egg that attracted the sunlight and made it shine even more. She examines it carefully thinking about how years ago the Targaryens did the most unsuspected things just to make them hatch, after all, Rhaegar himself was born in the middle of a fire that was destined to awaken a dragon.

She wonders who the dragon's mother is or who he was destined for. Ghael told her that the Targaryens kept the tradition alive for years of accompanying their newborns in their cradle with an egg. If they were lucky, the egg would hatch and only fate decided if it was a strong dragon and prospered or if it died within days.

And the other question that Jaenara is asking herself at this precise moment when observing it is how it got to that drawer. She asked Ghael to keep it in the trunk where she brought it and yesterday before saying good night he confirmed that he had followed her instructions.

She knows that during her stay in King's Landing she will be under surveillance most of the time and she also knows that the Red Keep is full of secret passages from where everyone is spied on by order of the king himself or by people who know the correct passageways, because Maegor in addition to being cruel, was intelligent, and not only created passages to spy on, but many of them are traps or dead ends where a trapped person would die and never be found.

She puts the egg back in the trunk it should have been. If the egg changed places that must say that someone else already knows that she is in the power of one and possibly that person rushed out and just left the egg where she could or wanted her to know that someone had had been in her room.

She's only been in the realm for a single day and already has a problem.

……

The sound of the clash of swords can be heard from the hallway before Jaenara exits to the place where the knights are training. In the center is Ser Oswell Whent and a knight she does not recognize, he seems young so must be new in the kingsguard. There are a lot of men watching the fight, cheering on the knights and making all kinds of suggestions, some of them quite… obscene.

"Lady Jaenara" The first to see her is Jaime Lannister but once he says her name all the men turn to see her.

"I hope I don't interrupt" She says smiling and walking towards the knights.

“Of course not my lady. I was hoping you would come to one of our training sessions, but I didn't think you would so soon”. Arthur Dayne in the light of dawn seems much younger than he looked last night in the Great Hall or perhaps it is not the light, it is the fact that at this moment with a sword in hand is where Arthur feels happy.

The knights fighting in combat stop and turn towards her. When the younger knight sees Jaenara, she can swear that he blushed even more than he already was from the effort of the fight as Oswell Whent looks at her curiously but indifferently at the same time.

He has always been a man of few words and a somewhat different humor, like Jaime Lannister he has no filter to say what he thinks but in Oswell his thoughts are somewhat _uncomfortable_ for others.

"This is Ser Oswell Whent and Ser Jonathan Donniger."

"A pleasure to meet you gentlemen"

When Ser Jonathan takes Jaenara's hand to greet her, the others begin to tease him and whistle, which in turn makes the young knight blush again.

“Don't listen to them Ser Jonathan, its envy. They are all old”, she says looking at the other men with a wicked smile.

"I told you gentlemen!" Jaime exclaims "Lady Jaenara is something else."

“And very pretty. With all due respect my lady” says Ser Jonathan.

"OH!!! Jhony is becoming a man!!” Says another of the knights hitting him on the back and everyone laughs out loud, even Jaenara can't help but laugh, it shows that they all have a very good relationship with each other.

"Thanks _Jhony_ " Approaching him Jaenara kisses his cheek and gives him a smile. Turning to the Lord Commander, she comments. "I think I was promised a sword dance, Ser Arthur."

You can feel the vibrations in the air once Ser Arthur and Ser Jaime hold the training swords in their hands and take their positions in the center of the courtyard. She remembers that they are both considered one of the best knights in the realm so it will definitely be a sight to behold.

Both men start the fight tentatively as if testing each other but once one of them launched a more defensive attack the real fight started. Jaime is an excellent opponent for Arthur, but the latter's experience is evident in every attack on his part as each one of them is precise, causing Jaime to try too hard to keep up. After minutes of a beautiful fight between two warrior brothers, just as Jaenara predicted, Arthur is the victor.

"Better luck for the next Ser Jaime"

Jaime's eyes sparkle with malice when they look at her while wiping the sweat from his face "I lacked the favor of my lady"

“Aren't knights supposed to swear celibacy?” He approaches her and whispers "You would be surprised at the amount of things that can be done without breaking that vow my lady"

For the first time in a long time, Jaenara blushes. So many years have passed since she felt the warmth of a body close to hers. In all her years at Essos she focused her life on her work at the bank and her family. She can't complain because the Rogare gave her all the love she needed to heal her wounded heart and she somehow had happy moments, but she was never able to open her heart to someone else.

Apparently she lost a lot of time in her thoughts because when she focuses her gaze on Ser Jaime he is in front of her with a face of shame. "I'm sorry my lady, I overdid myself"

Jaenara is about to reply that there is no need to apologize when Arthur appears next to her and tells her that they will go to the armory so they can bring bows and arrows.

The armory is located in the crypt of the white sword tower where the Lord Commander and his knights reside. It is not the first time that Jaenara walks through the cold and damp corridors, in the past she would come a couple of times with Rhaegar when she wanted to see one of his trainings. In Dorne, she often watched his brother do it and always wanted to feel the adrenaline rush that Oberyn described every time one of his matches ended. Although it was very different in Dorne from King's Landing, there men and women alike challenged each other to duels. She believes that it was in those moments that she felt the first pitying looks towards her, all the princesses and princes of Dorne had at least learned the art of wielding a sword, except her.

But Larra never denied it to her even at first when her health was still not very stable and she believes that she loves her a little more than her real mother just for that.

Larra believed in her and her abilities.

_"Got you"_ Jaenara hears Rhaegar's sweet voice in her ear and feels him grab her waist the same way he did the last time they were here and she ran away laughing at him. She looks back scared and realizes that it was actually Arthur who put his hand on her back with concern.

"Are you okay my lady?"

“Sorry, Ser Arthur, you must have heard what happened to me yesterday in the hallway before entering the Great Hall. I'm still not used to this place, which is combined with my fear of closed spaces”.

Arthur's face becomes sympathetic. “There is no need to apologize my lady. We all have our demons”.

Once they both collect a bow and arrows for each, they return to the courtyard with the other knights, but Jaenara also realizes that they have a new spectator. Queen Lyanna looks out into the courtyard from the balcony of one of the nearby towers. Apparently all the knights noticed her presence, because the spirits are much calmer and more serious than a while ago before she and Arthur left for the armory.

Lyanna is far enough away that she doesn't have to say hello, but close enough to acknowledge that she's there. So Jaenara looks in their direction, smiles and nods in greeting. Both women look at each other for a few seconds but it is enough for Jaenara to understand the words behind that gesture.

If in the past she thought that Lyanna Stark was just a silly young woman who was carried away by her husband's words, ten years definitely changed her.

Once she takes position at a considerable distance from the target she asks Arthur to take it and throw it into the air as high as he can.

"You're supposed to shoot the arrow at the target my lady" Arthur says grabbing it in the air when Jaenara just lets it fall without even making an effort to hit the red dot. She hears a couple of laughs from the men and some comment on how this is why women are not accepted as knights.

“Toss it on the air again on the count of three. High, Ser”.

Jaenara feels the wind, the direction and how it kisses her face.

She takes a deep breath. "One"

She changes her posture, adjusting her feet and torso. "Two"

She closes her eyes. "Three!"

Arthur throws the target into the air and she still with her eyes closed takes the bow and arrow letting it slide from her fingers towards the target.

When she opens her eyes she looks ahead and realizes that she hit the center of the target, throwing it against the wall of the tower that is next to the courtyard.

Looking around, she smiles at the men with a wink. “This is exactly why women should be accepted as knights”.

Looking at where the queen was, she realizes that she is no longer present.

If Lyanna changed in ten years, Elia did too, she is no longer the princess of Dorne, that too unfortunate young woman who had to marry the crown prince and who due to her weak health could not give him more children.

Life is a pyramid and Elia Martell was always below, but now Jaenara is above, controlling all the strings in her favor.

…..

Jaenara insisted that Ghael be present at her meeting with Rhaegar and Tywin. The king did not resist but Tywin, although he did not verbalize his refusal, it was obvious from the way he looked at the young man that he did not agree with him being present while they discussed economic matters of the crown.

Each is sitting in one of the chairs in Tywin's office in the tower of the hand. Rhaegar is leading the table, to his right Tywin; Jaenara and Ghael on the left.

"Well ... let's get started" says Jaenara.

Rhaegar turns to look at her and begins "As you must know Lady Jaenara my father was a man with a poor handling of finances once he removed Tywin Lannister from his position."

Jaenara nods.

“The iron throne was indebted to many Houses of Westeros including the Iron bank of Braavos. To handle the high debt acquired by him during the war period, we had to take many actions to minimize the situation”.

_Like naming Tywin your hand again since he would forgive much of the debt to House Lannister if you did._

"Over the years we have been able to prosper, pay off much of the debts and also make changes that will benefit the people who live in the realm”.

Rhaegar's face becomes reflective "But over the years we began to notice a substantial decline in the exploitation of gold mines, at first it was minimal, but after a couple of years we realized that the metal was scarce”.

_That metal does not last forever Rhaegar as king you must know those things._

“To alleviate the situation in some way, we have been mixing gold with other metals to create coins that have the same value as the gold dragon coins but with less ore. The merchants began to notice the change and soon the whole population knew it".

“I imagine what happened is that the coins began to devalue and people began to keep the ones that were made of pure gold. As a consequence the prices of the products rose …… Inflation is the correct term”.

"Exactly. That has brought us the problem we are facing now. Houses are preferring barter between their own vassals rather than continuing with exports and imports, which in turn has resulted in lower taxes for the crown and for hence in our current deficit situation".

“And what is the solution proposed by his grace. What is the participation of Rogare bank in this solution”

Rhaegar looks at Tywin, who has been silent throughout the meeting.

“One of the farmers who live in the mountains near Rhaenys Hill came to an audience with the king because a kind of hole had been created in his land that took most of his goats. We found the situation suspicious, so we sent some men to investigate. It turns out that under that mountain several meters underground there is a deposit of gold”.

"Mmhhm" Jaenara responds looking disinterested.

"The plan we have is to exploit that mine to reestablish the economy, but as his grace explained a moment ago, we are in a large deficit and none of the houses is in a position to make loans of the amount of gold that an operation like this requires" She knows from Tywin's expression that it hurts him to say that. House Lannister has always been one of the most financially powerful and Jaenara knows that if things were in Tywin's power he would be the one to make that loan. That the crown owes you a favor is a great advantage.

Rhaegar interrupts "In order to exploit the mine we need financial resources, you must know how expensive the process is, my lady" Jaenara agrees "What we propose to the Rogare bank is a rough gold loan sufficient to produce three million gold dragon coins here at King's Landing that we will repay in one year. With the corresponding interest, of course”.

Everything Rhaegar had just told Jaenara she had known for years. Her father sent spies to Kings Landing perhaps since the second or third year that she had lived with them. The moment she learned that gold was dwindling in the mines, she knew that one day it would be her chance to reenter Rhaegar's life.

She had to wait years but each one of them helped her arrive more prepared for this moment.

"Give me a reason”. Not the words Rhaegar expected to come out of her mouth because he seems a bit puzzled.

"A reason my lady?"

"Yes. You want us to loan you a large quantity of gold. What is the reason we should do it?"

After thinking about it for a moment, he says “In a city like this, the word spreads easily. It is said that you helped some small children on the day of your arrival"

Jaenara's brow furrows "What does that have to do with our conversation?"

He continues "Other things are said too, my lady, like that you give coins to the needy children in Essos and how one day some men stole those coins and the next morning they were found dead and each one with an arrow in his left eye" He leans over the table a little closer to her "If it were the case of any other highborn lady I would dare to say it was a coincidence or maybe that she hired someone to do it but from what I saw this morning, I think you killed the bandits without help”.

"First, your grace, spying is a very bad habit and second, I still don't understand where you want to go with that comment”.

“My point is that you care about my lady. You care about people as much as I do. Sometimes we are so blinded by our own lives that we forget that there are people who depend on us, on the decisions we make" It seems as if Rhaegar's eyes are lost in a painful memory. "One man cannot change the world alone, but I intend to work to improve it as much as possible".

Jaenara takes a deep breath trying to calm the anger that begins to accumulate in her “Inspirational words your grace especially coming from a person whose decisions caused a war in the past where those same people you speak of lost their lives… and for what reason? .... desire? infatuation?, inability to determine what would trigger your actions?” Her hands hold the wood of the table tightly "With all due respect your grace if you try to win my favor in any way unfortunately this is not the way" Jaenara's heart beats fast inside her chest “And with regard to the bandits in Essos, it is not a question of whether I care about the people or not, it is the fact that they stole something that was not theirs, that is what bothers me, the injustice and how it remains unpunished”. The muscles in her body feel stiff from the amount of anger that runs through her. "If you want something done right, do it yourself, they say”.

Before Rhaegar can say anything, Tywin interrupts, "If I wanted to discuss the importance of people's well-being, I would have become a septon”. Looking at Jaenara, he says "My lady, although I find it interesting that you have the ability to solve your problems through murder, that's not why we're here”.

"You're right Lord Tywin, the conversation got off topic" Getting up from her chair she gestured for Ghael to do the same. “I will have the answer of this negotiation in three days. If my answer is positive, I will send Ghael with a written document with the clauses that I deem appropriate the night before, with a copy to both”.

Both men get up from the table to say goodbye.

Jaenara feels Rhaegar's eyes on her until they disappear with Ghael from the room.

…..

"Are you alright, my lady? At the meeting you would seem a bit upset"

Jaenara and Ghael walk through the corridors of the Red Keep towards her room. With a sigh she replies "No Ghael, I'm not"

"Can I ask why?"

"It bothers me that people lie to me"

"Do you think there was a lie in the king's words?"

"I think ... he has good intentions but he has made too many mistakes to trust him"

_Letting our children die for example._

"May I speak freely my lady?" Ghael has always been a well-mannered boy even when he lived with his father, who never cared for him or his sister.

"Yes, you can" He stops in his walk and stares at her with an expression that mixes fear and anxiety about what he is going to say.

"It seemed....." He takes a deep breath and says "What happened in the tower of the hand seemed like when Lord Rogare and Lady Rogare argue" He whispers the last part "Like a couple argument" Jaenara's face pales and asks what made him come to such a conclusion.

"Well…. you were both very agitated and the king… was looking at you…. "

"He was looking at me...."

“His eyes seemed to be on fire… I don't know how to explain it but it was like when my lord and my lady are angry but deep down you know that afterwards they will withdraw from the room to… do… well _that_ ” Ghael blushes when he says the last part.

Ghael is still too young to know about such things so Jaenara laughs a little, letting his comment go by and changes the subject “I'm sure that's not how it looked. Tell me how you are doing with the task I gave you”.

“Oh well, Lady Ezzara hasn't really done much since we got to King’s Landing. She stays in her room or with you. Earlier today they went to the market with Lady Ihrra and I accompanied them but the truth is we only looked at objects and I didn't see anything unusual about her”.

"Keep spying on her movements, I'm sure there's something strange about her”. She says thoughtfully. When Jaenara has an intuition, she is usually right. “And what did you think of the market?”

"Mmmm, you know, my lady, everyone is nice to you because they want your coins and they recognized us as part of your routine, so it was not much different than at home”.

They both enter Jaenara's room and sit on the floor to talk, it's a bit strange for a highborn lady to have such habits, but Jaenara loves to be cross-legged on the floor talking to Ghael. It reminds her of when she played like that with her children on the rugs in their bedrooms.

"What caught my attention is... mm... how little people love ..." he brings his face close to hers "Queen Lyanna" He whispers.

"Did you hear something interesting?" She whispers back.

"In one of the stalls they commented on how she had visited the orphanage last week and everything had been fine until it was time to go" He played with his hands in his lap a little nervous. "They said that a man who did not belong to the orphanage and was drunk threw a rotten tomato to the dress and called her a whore ... and that he had made some comments such as that she was not the real queen".

Jaenara has not seen any hostility towards the queen at least it is the Red Keep but she supposes that in the city where ordinary people live it is something else.

"Do you know who Elia Martell is, my lady?" Ghael snapped her out of her thoughts with that question.

“She was Rhaegar's first wife. She died during the war along with her two children".

"I heard her name a couple of times." Ghael's eyes go sad. "The king must have suffered greatly for his loss".

"The king is practically the causer of their deaths, Ghael," she says harshly but regrets instantly, after all, Ghael knows nothing of what she lived; it is not his fault to believe that perhaps Rhaegar mourned his loss.

“My father… never loved us, my lady… he never cared about us. He was very hard on me and my sister, but especially on our mother. I am not ashamed to say that I did not mourn him. I was grateful that he couldn't hurt us again. But if what the people in the city say is true, I think King Rhaegar loved his family”.

Curiosity is a dangerous emotion. It makes you ask things you shouldn't. Jaenara knows this well because she can't help asking. "What do they say?"

"That the king's screams of agony were heard throughout the realm when he found his family dead, that he used to play the harp but has never done so since that day”. His eyes meet hers “They say that there is no worse punishment than being responsible for the death of his own family and that it is seen in the eyes of the king that he has carried that burden all these years .... They say that his eyes look sad and lost just like Jaehaerys l after the departure of Queen Alysanne”.

…..

Hours after Ghael left the room, his words still echo in her head, making her remember the last time she saw Rhaegar before he left with Lyanna Stark.

_Elia spends her days with her children or in her room, after Aegon's birth she spent many weeks in bed and now months after his birth she still feels more tired than usual. Finding that letter a few days ago didn't help her health either. If at any point she had the slight hope that she could fix things between her and her husband, that letter definitely killed them._

_She had a suspicion that Rhaegar and Lyanna were in contact since Harrenhal, but she confirmed her suspicions when she entered Rhaegar's study and found the sheet of paper stored in one of the drawers._

_Dear knight, my heart beats faster every day. I hope everything goes according to plan and our next meeting is the final one, I don't want to spend another day without you._

_Yours._

_L.S._

_It was easy to find out what it was about. Somehow, her husband planned to run away with Lyanna Stark or he planned to take her to Kings Landing and make her his second wife. She knew that Rhaegar would not divorce her because it would be an insult to Dorne and history has never been on the side of the Targaryens when it comes to battles between the two Houses._

_"Elia" Speaking of the prince of discord._

_"Husband"_

_Rhaegar sighs resignedly and approaches her "I'm going to be away for a while"_

_Escaping with Lyanna is then "Alright"_

_"It will be a long trip Elia" when he doesn't get a reply from her, he begs "Can you at least look me in the eye?"_

_She does and replies "I don't know what you want from me Rhaegar"._

_"I don't know how to get to you" He raises his hand as if he wants to touch her face but regrets it at the last minute and puts it back on its side "I couldn't do it and after this trip I'm afraid I'll never be able to put together what I broke” His face is in such agony that anyone would think it hurts to leave but Elia is past the stage where she could have forgiven him. Nothing remains of the man he was or at least the man she thought he was “Can you ever forgive me?”_

_She turns and walks with the intention of leaving the room thinking about leaving without saying another word but then changes her mind and halfway to the exit she turns and looks at him again._ _“It's what you need Rhaegar, my pardon. Then you got it. I forgive you. I forgive you for humiliating me in a tournament that I didn't give a shit about and never wanted to attend. I forgive you for writing letters to Lyanna Stark all these months”. She sees the surprise on Rhaegar's face “But we both know that those are not your biggest sins, right husband. Don't worry; I also forgive you for escaping with your whore from the north”. She walks towards him again and takes his face in her hands then approaches his ear whispering "But one day in the future, maybe years later, you'll come crawling on your knees asking me to accept you again. And you know what I'm going to do?" she turns her face away from his ear and now looks into his violet eyes. “I'm going to let you sink into the crap that you created. I will have no compassion for you like you had no compassion for me. I will enjoy your suffering”._

_Elia doesn't wait for Rhaegar to give her an answer and simply prepares to leave the room before the choking tears fall from her eyes. Arthur is at the door and by the look on his face she knows he heard everything._

_She also knows that he will accompany her husband. He always does._

_She did not see Rhaegar again until about five months later, when he arrived at the Red Keep to lead the army to the battle of the trident._

It has been a tiring day so Jaenara only thinks about sleeping. She is getting ready to go to bed when someone knocks at the door.

She puts on the silk robe she brought from Essos and opens the door uncertainly. It is late enough to receive visitors.

On the other side of the door is a young woman of about fifteen with a beautiful bouquet of red roses.

"My lady. My lord sent me with this gift for you”.

Jaenara looks at her suspiciously. "And we are talking about lord...”

"Lord Tywin"

Jaenara's eyes snapped open, almost popping out of her head in surprise; she certainly didn't expect Tywin Lannister send her anything.

The young woman hands her the bouquet and says "My lord says don't forget to read the note" and runs down the hall.

Jaenara leaves the roses in a small vase that is on the table in her room and looks among them where she finds a small paper that says:

At dawn. Tower of the Hand. Don't be late.

Jaenara falls on her bed sighing and looking at the note trying to decipher why the king's hand wants to see her at such unusual time. If Tywin Lannister wishes to see you clearly intending it to be a secret meeting, that doesn't mean anything good.

_Oh fuck….._


	5. Lady Lannister

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think the name of the chapter speaks for itself.  
> Enjoy the ride folks because after this chapter things will be chaos... :)

Every step Jaenara takes brings her closer to the tower of the hand and to an uncertain future. She couldn't sleep through the night thinking about all the different scenarios, about everything that could happen in this meeting. Tywin Lannister is not exactly known for being a kind man. She has even come to think that he knows the truth, that he somehow recognized her and now wants to blackmail her or worse, is waiting with the king and unmasks her in front of him.

It has been a real odyssey to avoid the large number of guards in the different corridors but her knowledge of them in the past has helped her avoid them and go unnoticed. Once she is at the gate of the tower, she sees that there is no one guarding the entrance so she assumes that Tywin is ready for her arrival.

The door to Tywin's office is closed and Jaenara hesitates for a second to raise her hand to the doorknob to open it. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to come to this meeting without notifying anyone, maybe Ghael should have at least known her whereabouts in case Tywin decides he doesn't need her and her body is found outside the Red Keep and the mystery of her death is forever unsolved.

Finally taking a great breath of air decides that if this is the end, so be it.

Perhaps her children are waiting for her somewhere.

When she enters the room she sees Tywin with his back to her looking out the window, he felt her enter but did not even move a muscle from his position.

"I must say I was quite surprised by your note, my lord." She says approaching him. "Thanks for the roses by the way".

"Do you know the story of how my father ruined the Lannister name my lady?"

"I've heard a few things" The view of the tower from the hand is beautiful. You can see the green meadows of the mountains and you can almost breathe nature.

“Some would say that my father was a kind man” He stops looking out the window and turns to Jaenara “But I think he was weak. And a weak man cannot lead".

"It's ... an interesting prospect but I really don't think you called me to this meeting to talk about your father”.

He gives her a smile and invites her to sit down.

"I have a proposal for you"

"What kind of proposal are we talking about?"

"A marriage proposal between House Lannister and House Rogare”.

"I am sorry my lord but if the stories are true you do not consider your son Tyrion as your heir and unless you convince Ser Jaime to leave the kingsguard, which I doubt, then without another male child I do not know with whom this marriage would be".

"The marriage I have in mind is between you and me, my lady”.

Jaenara is silent for a second because she is not sure she has heard very well what Tywin is saying. Finally the words come out of her mouth. "House Lannister is not what it was before and it is a matter of time before everyone in Westeros knows of the situation, so with all due respect Lord Tywin, I don't know how an alliance between my House, which is one of the most powerful, and yours, it would benefit us in some way”.

Jaenara remembers the moment when Tywin Lannister offered his son Tyrion to marry her and her mother took it as such an insult that she did her best to get revenge on him and that is how Jaenara ended up married to the future king of the seven kingdoms. She wonders if when he rejected her in the past as Jaime's future wife, he thought that one day he would even be willing to marry her.

A smile just like the one Tywin gave her during their first dinner at Kings Landing appears on his face and just like the last time she feels a chill run through her.

“We are both people with an empire on our shoulders. This is about business and now, my Lady, your interests and mine are aligned. As I said before a weak man cannot lead”.

Once his words make sense to Jaenara, she says a bit surprised "You're thinking of rebelling against Rhaegar". After a second she thinks that maybe this is a trap and the king is behind some door or wall waiting for her to admit that she has come here to destabilize his life and take the power from his hands. "Just talking about it means treason, my lord, even more coming from the hand of the king”.

"I only see for the interests of my House”.

"And how is Lord Tywin so sure that I will not leave here and go to the king to inform him that his own hand is working to remove him from the throne?"

“Lysandro Rogare is a smart man. He wouldn't let his daughter, his only heir, travel to Kings Landing all these miles just because of a promise of negotiation. If I were him, I would have made Rhaegar travel to Essos and the king is so desperate I know he would have”. He leans back in his seat “I'm sure you already know the answer to Rhaegar's proposal even before you got here and I imagine it's a positive one”.

"And what do you propose?"

_There is nothing wrong with asking, right?_

“Our contract would be strictly political. The consummation of the marriage is optional because as you can see, my lady, I already have ... three children ... so I would not need any more babies; you can continue at the head of the Rogare Bank as your father wishes and if in the future the possibility arises that you want to have a lover, with due guarantees, I would not oppose it”. He takes a piece of paper from the right drawer of his desk and hands her what looks like a prenuptial contract. "What I need is the support of House Rogare in the decisions that are made in Kings Landing, which could be financial support or new soldiers and of course once Rhaegar is out of power, House Lannister will have full dominion over the mines of gold, those that already exist and those that can be found in the future”.

She reads the document that seems quite detailed with the obligations of each family and of them as individuals and part of the union. One of the sections at the end is the one that catches Jaenara's attention.

"It says here that the alliance would not only be with House Lannister but that we must also offer our support and loyalty to the House that will occupy the throne in the future" She has a feeling that she knows where the conversation is going and which house they're talking about because it's the only option where Tywin would put a clause like this and it would benefit the Lannisters in any way. "I didn't think that after so many years House Bratheon still had grudges."

"You'd be surprised how many years someone can wait for the exact moment to act"

_I waited ten years, so at this point in my life not many things surprise me._

"But no, my lady, at least this time you are wrong"

"Who should we support then?"

The wrinkles on Tywin's face become more prominent as small rays of sunlight peek through the window and Jaenara remembers that he is quite a mature man and that if for some reason she says yes to this marriage she would be marrying someone that could be her father.

"House Martell" he says nonchalantly as if it were just one more house name in Westeros.

Her lungs begin to demand oxygen and Jaenara realizes that she stopped breathing the moment she heard that name. She can only think of her brothers, her family. Surely this rebellion is for her, to avenge their deaths.

She tries to keep her voice from sounding strangled when she speaks "And does House Martell know about this alliance?"

“Not yet, I wanted to discuss it with you first, my lady, but there will soon be a tourney honoring Princess Deanery’s eleventh birthday. The Martells will be present and by then our marriage will be announced”.

"I see you very sure of my answer my lord"

"I already told you our interests are the same at this time”.

"You keep talking about mutual interests but the only thing I thought we had in common was our link to the Kings Landing economy”.

"And it will continue to be, only with a different king" He rises from his seat and when he reaches her side he offers his hand. When Jaenara is standing in front of him, Lord Tywin takes out a small box from his pocket. “In five days I expect an answer. The morning of that day at breakfast you only have to wear this ring and I will understand that you have accepted”. She looks at the ring; it is pure gold with a red diamond in the center.

"I must go back to my room before someone notices that I am not there" This whole situation has completely overcome her; she needs to rethink and process everything that has happened.

So many possibilities.

Lord Tywin says goodbye to her and returns to his desk.

“My lady” She stops before opening the door “I am going to give you a peace offering. Take it as a small anticipated wedding gift”. Jaenara turns her face towards him. “Some rooms in the Red Keep are quite ... Interesting ... especially the one where that maiden of yours sleeps, I think her name is Ezzara”.

"And what is interesting about that room, my lord"

"It has a passage that leads to a door located near Queen Lyanna's room."

_Bitch._

…..

Lying down looking at the ceiling of the room, Jaenara remembers that when Larra and Lysandro discovered that the person they were keeping in their house was Elia Martell, Rhaegar Targaryen's wife, they told her it was a surprise for multiple reasons, the first, the news that she and her children were dead was known throughout Westeros and even in the lands beyond, the second, because it was said that the king took the bodies to Dorne where they were buried along with the rest of her family and if Elia was with them, how was it possible that no one in Dorne realized that the woman who arrived was not a Martell, especially her brother Oberyn, who was always said to be very close, and the third, because it meant that the rightful queen of the seven kingdoms lived with them.

It was at this time that Lysandro offered Elia to write a letter to her brother Oberyn. He had traveled to Essos before on multiple occasions it would not be suspected if he traveled again but she refused, she did not want anyone to harm her brother by discovering the letter or worse that they were watching him and discovering her. She had no desire to return to Kings Landing and if she was found that was her destiny as she was still married to Rhaegar despite his escape with the young Stark.

Jaenara remembers little of how she got to Essos; she is not sure how she got to that ship that took her to those lands. Beside to the memory that she had the first day she arrived, her mind has not remembered anything else and the truth is she does not know if it is good or bad to remember. It leaves her even more confused by what happened.

Looking back, maybe if she had accepted that Lysandro sent the letter, maybe none of this would be happening now. She would have healed her wounds with her brothers and lived in Dorne with them. But deep down she knows that is not what would have happened at all, there is something strange about her arrival in Essos. She is certain that if the world had known she was alive, she would not have lived to reign for a single day.

Not that she wanted that, all she ever wanted was a family. A husband to trust and with whom to share a life. She knew that arranged marriages rarely fell in love, but at first she hoped they were the exception.

There was a time in their marriage after Rhaenys was born that she believed her husband had cast aside his prophecies. He spent a lot of time with them and although he called the girl by a name that was not to her liking and was directly related to the head of the three dragons, he seemed quite carefree and they even made plans to visit Dorne, because he knew how much she missed her land. She remembers that he even confronted his father for the first time after he insulted her as usual.

It was like a false spring.

But everything changed when she became pregnant with Aegon; she watched as her husband's mind slowly clouded again. By the time it was the Tourney at Harrenhal, discovering Lyanna Stark was only confirmation that his daughter would be born from the union of ice and fire as it was written.

The sun is shining high and she knows that in another hour she will have to show up for breakfast so she decides to wait in her bed for Ihrra and Ezzara to arrive so she can take a bath and hopefully the water can wash away her feelings and clear up her mind.

Ezzara spies on her for Lyanna.

Tywin made a marriage proposal that she would never have considered, but knowing that Dorne is about to rebel changes everything.

A tourney is coming up and it is very likely that she will see Oberyn after thirteen years.

Rhaegar probably spies on her in some way too.

She covers her face with the pillow and screams loudly.

…..

The water in the bathtub is warm when Jaenara touches it with her fingers, it is the perfect temperature. Ihrra chatters non-stop while preparing oils and some flowers to add to the water, but Ezzara is particularly quiet.

"My lady, this morning a beautiful carriage arrived, I think the king's siblings finally reached Kings Landing" says Ihrra mixing the oil with the flowers.

_Viserys and Daenerys_

"Did you see the carriage, Ezzara?"

"Yes my lady" She says while pouring more water into the bathtub "I seem to have seen a young man with blond hair similar to the king. I imagine it is his brother”.

"They say that Prince Viserys is as beautiful as Rhaegar" adds Ihrra.

"May I have your robe, my lady," Ezzara says approaching her, reaching out to remove the robe that covers Jaenara's naked body. No maid helped her bathe since she stopped being called Elia and became Jaenara. She knows that they are here for that and it is normal for them to help her in this type of activity but when confirming that what she suspected was true and that Ezzara is a cunning spy, she cannot help but distrust her at this time. She knows it's irrational to think that she could drown her, especially with Ihrra here, but when Ezzara puts her hand on the robe, Jaenara reacts and grabs her wrist tightly.

Both women look directly at each other and she can see the doubt on Ezzara's face and also some pain due to the strong grip of her hand.

"I can do it alone, thanks Ezzara”. She slowly lets go of her wrist and smiles at her in hopes of calming the woman down.

If Ezzara is a spy for the queen, Jaenara will have her close by and will let the queen know what she wants her to know.

"I'm sorry my lady, I'll remember next time not to do it again”.

After the bath, both maids help her choose a dress for the day and Jaenara, knowing that the two Targaryen siblings will be present today, decides to choose something a little finer than her usual day dresses.

She opts for a beautiful yellow silk dress that reveals part of her back and has a wide neckline; and a slit at the leg.

Ihrra, who has another dress in her hand, a much more sober old rose color, says "My lady, if I can give an opinion, I think you look beautiful, but don't you think that perhaps for a breakfast it is a little... revealing?”

Jaenara, looking at herself in the mirror, thinks it's the same color as the Dorne sigil and says "No, I think it's perfect”.

The three women walk the aisles saluting the knights who meet along the way, and as Ihrra said, the dress is revealing as most of them struggle with themselves to keep their eyes off their breasts.

Once at the door of the room where the royal family and guests have breakfast, their maids move to the other room where the Red Keep staff do, leaving Jaenara to enter the dragon's mouth alone.

Once inside, she realizes that she is one of the last to arrive, since Lyanna, Jon, Rhaegar and a girl who she assumes is Daenerys are with them. They are talking near the window overlooking the gardens. All eyes turn to her when she enters the room.

"Good morning" Jaenara bows to the royal family.

"Lady Jaenara" Lyanna speaks "I thought maybe today you would join the knights again, you seemed very comfortable with them yesterday".

“It was an experience that I will definitely repeat, but I heard that the prince and princess had arrived today. I couldn't not be present”. She looks at the girl, is beautiful and she looks a lot like Rhaella. She seems shy because she gives Jaenara a small smile, but the hand that is entwined with Rhaegar's has white knuckles due to how tight her grip is.

"My sister, Princess Daenerys Targaryen" says Rhaegar with a softer voice than normal which makes Jaenara look at him, that's when she notices that the slit in her dress reveals the beginning of the scar Aerys left on her thigh and Rhaegar is looking at her.

Jaenara hides her leg inside the cloth and says "A horse ride on the lake near my house that went wrong."

Rhaegar looks up and seems embarrassed "I'm sorry my lady, I shouldn't have done it"

She just tries to smile, but inside she feels a great panic. Perhaps he recognized the pattern of the cut; It is easy for a knight to differentiate a normal wound from one made by a sword. She didn't think about that when she decided on this dress in the morning and now if she changes it after breakfast it would be very suspicious.

A voice interrupts her thoughts "If I had known that Lady Rogare was such a beautiful woman, I would have fought the storm just to meet her”.

She turns and sees a man in his twenties. It is certainly Viserys Targaryen, if Daenerys looks like Rhaella she looks like Rhaegar's twin.

"If I had known that Prince Viserys is so charming, i would have anticipated my arrival and you would have met me before your departure”.

"Sassy”. He leans in and takes her hand in such a gentlemanly way that Jaenara can't help but laugh.

"Visy" Daenerys sweet voice interrupts the exchange.

Hearing her sister's voice, Viserys eyes that a second ago were filled with malice now turn sweet and loving.

"My favorite princess". He takes her in his arms and lifts her into the air with such force that the girl squeals with joy and since Jaenara arrived in the room it is the first time that she has seen her relaxed. Without a doubt, the bond between the two is strong.

She did not know Viserys very much when he was little because Aerys was paranoid and did not want anyone to approach him but from what Rhaella told her he was a sweet but lonely boy since he spent a lot of time with maesters and maids but little with the family. Aerys was so cruel that he did not allow Rhaella herself to stay with him for long.

Seeing both siblings like this makes her think about how her life with them might have been if the events had been different.

At the table, the air is different from how the family had been the two previous days; she feels a tension that had not been present before and believes it has to do with the arrival of the siblings, with Viserys in particular.

“Lady Jaenara I hope your stay at Kings Landing is being pleasant”.

_As if Ezzara hadn't informed you._

"I'm very happy in Westeros queen Lyanna thank you for asking".

"I suppose if you do business with my husband it will extend for a while”. The young woman says and before Jaenara can answer Rhaegar interrupts them.

"Lady Jaenara is welcome here for as long as she sees fit, whether business is conducted between us or not”. Something in Rhaegar's voice and the way he looks at Lyanna for her comment makes Jaenara think it's a conversation the couple have had before and from Lyanna's face, she doesn't want Jaenara here.

The big question is _why?_

"Lady Jaenara my sister Dany wants to know what Essos is like and the truth is that I've never been there too"

There is a way to explain Essos that will surely make the awkward moment even more awkward but Jaenara lives to see the expressions of the Targaryen-Stark marriage when a subject is difficult for them. It makes her feel powerful.

"Have you ever been to Dorne Prince?"

"Once. It was for the funeral of Queen Elia and my nephew and niece”. She thinks it's the first time she's heard someone call Elia Queen and Viserys does it in such a way that it seems that whenever he talks about her he calls her that, as if he had respect for her dead aunt who didn't even know that much.

Then Jaenara has a fleeting thought, she looks at Viserys and Daenerys even at Jon who, as always, is sitting in silence and realizes that she does not know what will become of them if there is a rebellion.

And if they kill them in the same way as her children.

Or worse, used in some way in a war that doesn't belong to them.

"I am sorry, I didn't think about what I said"

"Don't worry Lady Jaenara, what you say is true, Essos is as beautiful as Dorne”. A gloomy silence ensues after Rhaegar's words and Jaenara is grateful when the sweet voice of the little Targaryen is heard.

"Are there dragons in Essos, my lady?"

She smiles at her words and the girl's excited expression. "Not that I have seen”. Disappointment is evident on her face and Jaenara recalls a story her father once told her.

"But I'm going to tell you a little secret," Jaenara says softly, as if pretending that others won't be able to hear her.

"When my parents married, they had nothing, my grandfather was a powerful man, but he did not want my father to marry a Rhoynar woman, he wanted a woman of Valyrian descent for my father, so he disinherited him”. Jaenara realizes that she has the attention of everyone at the table “That's why the first two or three years of their marriage were difficult since my grandfather made sure that no one hired my father in the hope that he would come home that way and fulfill the duties that he believed a son should fulfill”. The girl looks at her with those huge violet eyes that remind her of Lysandro “My father never thought of abandoning my mother, he loved her, he still does, so they decided to seek a life together. This is how they went to the ruins of old Valyria”. When he told her the story, she imagined what it would have become of hers if she had had such a husband. “They would go through the ruins by boat in search of objects that they could sell in the market, so they would constantly go ashore. But they had been eating very little for days, which made them tired and thought about getting some sleep under the shade of a tree, which is why they tied the boat to a trunk”. Jaenara leans over the table approaching Daenerys who is in front of her “Hours later they woke up and realized that they were not in the ruins of Valyria but in a small river near the house where they lived, but arriving there without anyone navigating the boat was almost impossible”.

"Was it a dragon?" She asks excitedly.

Jaenara laughs at her enthusiasm “My father found out days later that the sector where they were had been set on fire by pirates who roamed the area in search of objects to take to the black market the same day they were there. As the days went by, they tried to forget what happened despite the strangeness of the event until my father had a dream in which they were both in the boat and my father's eyes would open because the sun was bothering him and he saw something grabbing the wood from the boat and dragged it slowly through the water; something that looked like a kind of claw”.

"I knew it! A dragon!"

Jaenara laughs again and leans back in her chair “I don't know if a dragon, princess, but something saved my parents that day. There could be many possibilities, but the fact is that they could never explain it to themselves and my father continued to have that dream a couple of times in the following years”.

"It is really fortunate that your parents have not passed away my lady or I would not have the pleasure of meeting you"

"You flatter me prince" Viserys seems amused when he looks at his sister and she can't stop talking about how she plans to go to Essos in search of the Dragon when she grows up, she even makes plans asking Jaenara if she would welcome her into her house to what she answers affirmatively, causing even more euphoria in the little girl.

The rest of breakfast goes by without news and when Jaenara leaves the room she thinks about the story of her father and the egg in her room and how strange it is that Lysandro found a dragon egg before she came here.

…..

_Rhaegar slowly closes the door of the room, walks stealthily towards the bed that is in the center but before lying on it he stops to look at his wife. The moonlight marks her silhouette on the sheets that cover her and her long wavy hair rests wildly on the pillow. It is one of the attributes that he likes the most about her._

_"What are you doing here?" Elia whispers still a little sleepy when she feels someone lie down next to her. She knows that is her husband, somehow she can feel it._

_"I missed you both" Rhaegar hugs her putting his hand on her bulging belly._

_"If your mother knows that you are here-"_

_Rhaegar hides his face in Elia's neck and breathes her in cutting her words._

_"I couldn't sleep" he says with a worried tone and clinging to her like his life depends on it._

_Elia tries to turn around so she can look at his face but he just keeps her prisoner in his arms and says "I wish ..." he breathes "I wish we were different”._

_"What do you mean?" She asks curiously._

_"Not having all these responsibilities ... all this burden on our shoulders" He whispers in her ear. "I don't know maybe being some kind of farmer and living in a house with our little dragons”._

_He hears her laugh "And what do you think we would live on if we don't even know how to plant a vegetable"_

_He snuggles closer to her "I don't know… maybe we can plant …… figs"_

_Elia snorts “There's a reason figs don't grow in Kings Landing and they do in Dorne. I assure you that even if we planted them correctly, not a single one would grow here. You need the Dorne climate for that”._

_"I would find a way"_

_"I think husband" gives her a little squeeze on the hand "I think it's a nice fantasy but I also think I like our reality, here and now”._

_They are both silent for a few minutes and when Elia thinks he's fallen asleep, Rhaegar speaks again._

_“I do not want to leave you". Those are the words Rhaegar was afraid to recognize. All his life he has grown up with the responsibility of carrying out a prophecy. The lives of thousands depend on him doing his duty, but lately he wonders if he can do it. His nightmares have become more vivid lately and he thinks that the time will soon come when he must follow the path that has been entrusted to him._

_One that since Elia Martell entered his life is not as clear as he thought._

_“Your father is increasingly unstable Rhaegar, he entrusts you with pointless missions just to keep you away from King’s Landing. He knows that people prefer you much more than him”. Elia says without understanding the true meaning of his words._

_"I know" Rhaegar finally lets Elia roll over to him on the bed, it takes at least two tries that she can do it due to her late pregnancy. In two months the baby should be born._

_She gets as close to his body as possible, caressing his face "I'm afraid of what he might do. I fear for all of us”._

_“Enough talking about my father. Let's talk about what's really important” he says looking at her belly. He knows that the Red Keep is full of his father's spies who have access to the most unexpected places. It is better not to risk saying something that he may interpret as treason._

_She smiles "I've been thinking of names”. Elia rearranges herself on the bed when her belly starts to bother her._

_"Tell me" Rhaegar removes the covers from their bodies and slides down to put his ear on his wife's belly, it calms him to hear and feel the baby._

_“I know it must be a Targaryen name… but there is one that would also be dornish. Alysanne”._

_Rhaegar feels the baby move harder and places his hand on the spot. For a moment he allows himself to dream that this is the name they will give her and that she will be a beautiful girl with violet eyes and dark hair._

_"I think she likes it"_

_Elia starts stroking his hair and as she does so, Rhaegar thinks about how he must treasure these moments when his wife still looks at him with trusting eyes. He allows himself to think of a different reality where he will not betray his wife in the name of a prophecy by naming the girl Rhaenys instead of Alysanne and that they are both just two ordinary people living austere but happy lives._

_"Is there something you haven't told me, husband?"_

_Rhaegar tries to sound nonchalant "Why are you asking?"_

_"I don't know, maybe because you came to me in the middle of the night while your mother has me confined from my pregnancy, and though I love that you defied authority by being a rebellious prince, it seems to me that you are even more thoughtful than usual” She has always been an intelligent and very observant woman, even when you think she is not paying attention. She is._

_The hand that Rhaegar had on her belly above the nightgown moved down to her thigh and slipped it under the garment, slowly bringing it to her belly again but this time touching her bare skin. "If you want my wife, I can respect authority and go to my room”. He says nuzzling against her belly._

_"I think you're trying to divert the topic, my husband" She lowers her hand to his hair where she fisted it and tugged it a little so his eyes met hers. "Luck for you is working"_

_Rhaegar lifts his body and, trying not to put weight on her, kisses her passionately. When they part, they are both out of breath and Rhaegar rearranges them on the bed so that Elia is more comfortable and ends up straddling him. She takes off her nightgown and is completely naked._

_"Tell me husband for the month your mother has confined me Cersei Lannister hasn't come to Kings Landing to tempt you to take her as a lover" As she asks that her lips kiss his neck._

_Rhaegar knows how jealous Elia is of the young lioness so his answer is just to fuel the fire in her. "I think I saw Lady Cersei in the hallways near my room”. Elia abruptly stops the path of kisses she was leaving on his neck and lifts her head to stare at him "Rhaegar" She tightly takes his face between her two hands "You are mine or you are not as simple as that. Not because I'm from Dorne and my brother is famous for having a woman in every port does it means that I would accept that you have lovers. Getting married was a commitment to me. It means that we will be one now and always; and if the day comes when you no longer see me as your complement then tell me and let me go because nothing would be worse if you betrayed me”._

_He did not expect that answer, he believed that like so many times in the past they would tease each other and they would end up joining in that dance that now they both know so well._

_"Avy jorrāelan" Rhaegar is tired of living in this agony, life is not fair for someone like him. Since he was born he always knew that his existence meant something greater, that he was destined to dedicate his life to save others but perhaps he is the one who needs to be saved._

_"What does that mean?" Asks his wife, confused._

_"I want you". He says with a seductive smile._

_"You have me" she kisses him again and they lose each other for the rest of the night._

…..

Years later, when Lysandro was teaching Jaenara High Valyrian, she realized that it didn't mean _"I want you"_ but _"I love you"_ and thinks she hates him a little more for it.

How can you love someone and hurt them so much, leave them with nothing, empty.

But a small part of her that still had very fresh memories of the past wondered why he couldn't admit the true meaning of the phrase.

…..

_The old house where they spent hours playing when they were little hasn't changed much over the years and Ashara finds herself returning to this place more and more since she returned to Dorne. She arrived early today because she knows he will find her here._

_She confirms it when she feels his footsteps behind her._

_"When I learned that Rhaegar Targaryen would come to Dorne on the ship that brings the bodies of Elia and the children, I knew that if you were on that ship you would also come to this place”. She feels Arthur stop next to her. "We used to play here when we were little, remember... you, Oberyn, Elia and me”._

_"Sister-"_

_"No." She turns to see him. His brother has changed a lot since the last time she saw him, his face shows the marks of a man who has gone to war more than once, both in visible marks and in his expression. "You know what it's like to be ashamed to walk with your head held high in your own home." Ashara's anger chokes her._

_Arthur's eyes fill with tears and his face looks sorry, but that doesn't stop her. "Of course you don't know because to everyone you are still the great Arthur Dayne, Sword of the Morning” She takes out of her pocket the necklace that he gave her when she was eleven years old and that she never took from her neck. It's a simple necklace, but for a thirteen-year-old it must have cost a fortune in the market. Looking at the jewel one last time, she throws it at his feet "You are no longer my brother”. He tries to take her by the hand and she pushes it away. "You have no family in these lands, Arthur”._

_"Ashara....-"_

_"What were you thinking!" Ashara never thought that the brother she loved so much could inspire in her the hatred she feels right now. "Perhaps in the seven kingdoms everyone will remember you as a great knight, if not the best of all time, but I will die without remembering a single day of my life the name of Arthur Dayne because for me you have been dead since you decided to put your vows above the family”._

_"The whole kingdom can remember, but if you, my sister, don't, I have nothing" He manages to take her face in his hands as if he wants to memorize it for the last time "I'm sorry" He whispers "I thought I was doing the right thing”._

_He slowly withdraws his hands and both brothers look at each other with visible agony in their eyes "You may not have killed them, but you weren't there to protect them”._

_She starts to walk away but before doing so she looks at him for the last time “If I were you, I would take care of my back and your king. Oberyn Martell isn't going to sit around Dorne doing nothing; you know that, he's not nicknamed the Red Viper for nothing”._

_That is the last time the two brothers saw each other._

_Ashara had a beautiful girl named Elia Dayne who her mother had never told about an uncle named Arthur._

_….._

"Father"

Tywin Lannister is sitting behind his desk sorting some papers and without paying much attention, he just gestures for Jaime to sit down.

Jaime Lannister knows that if his father calls him it is because nothing good will come out of the conversation. Recently, he calls him more frequently to pressure him to leave the kingsguard and take the position of Lord Paramount of the West at Casterly Rock. According to his father, it is becoming more and more urgent that there is a Lord Lannister at the Rock, and although Jaime intuits that in part it has to do with the uncertainty that exists in the kingdom due to the economic situation, he also believes that there is more and that his father as always wants to take advantage of the situation in some way.

Finally Tywin puts the papers aside and looks up. "Have you thought about what we have talked about"

And here it goes again "Father my decision has been final for years and has not changed"

"Alright. We won't talk about it again. For now." It's the first time they've talked about the subject so briefly and Tywin doesn't seem angry at his refusal, giving arguments like family is first and the other arguments he always gives. Which seems quite suspicious for the young lion. “New changes are coming for our House. Changes that will benefit us, so I hope for your help at least in this Jaime, especially with your sister. I think she won't take the news very well”.

Jaime a little puzzled asks "What do you mean?"

"Casterly Rock will have a new Lady Lannister”. Tywin says with challenging eyes.

"Father ... will you marry Tyrion?... because if it is that, although I am happy that you finally recognize him as the true heir of your legacy, you know that he-"

"Of course I will not marry Tyrion, I will not waste my time with him and you know it." Tywin hits the table with his fists “That abomination is not my son and he will never inherit the Rock”.

"If our mother-"

"Your mother Jaime cannot say anything because in case you forget he is responsible for her not being able to speak anymore" Jaime speaks again but Tywin raises his hand and shuts him up.

"I didn't call you to discuss what we can't change"

"If my brother is not the lucky one then…” For a second, Jaime thinks about the only possibility he has left. "Tell me we're not talking about the woman you sent roses to”.

“The Rogare family is one of the most powerful of Essos and the Lannisters in Westeros. It will be an alliance that will benefit both families”.

"Did she accept?"

"I gave her a week to make a decision”.

The young Lannister watches his father closely. He had never considered marriage before; he never had a lover, at least none that Jaime knew. The memory of his mother has always been fresh in his memory and, in his father's eyes, no woman compares to her.

"This is the change you mean or there are more changes than I should know."

“For now this is the important thing. The marriage will be made shortly once Jaenara gives me her answer. Larra and Lysandro Rogare must be present so I estimate that in a month the wedding should take place”.

“Why do you sound so confident that her answer will be positive? She could tell you no”

"Jaime" The old lion hardens his expression "That is why you have never earned my respect. You did not learn anything. You think I would make a proposal like this if I was not sure of the answer. All people have a price; you just have to know how to look in the right place. If you look carefully you can discover the most unexpected things” He picks up the papers that he had left and that is the sign that the meeting is over and Jaime has been dismiss.

While going down the stairs, Jaime thinks about his father's words and how he is wrong about one thing, he has paid attention. If not, he would not have realized that Lady Rogare ran out of her room at dawn to come see him or that the first night she spent here she cried inconsolably for most of the night.

Jaenara Rogare is definitely a woman who came to Kings Landing with a purpose. Only that Jaime becomes more convinced every day that it is not just about doing business with Rhaegar and that she hides something behind that business woman mask.


	6. I Was Wrong About You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone ... this story update is a mixture of many things but I know that some of you are waiting for answers like ... what happened to Dorne ?, how could Elia disappear without anyone noticing ?, who died instead of her?... many questions, and this chapter opens the doors to answer them. 
> 
> In this one and chapters seven and eight, there will be many flashbacks and memories that will begin to shape the past so I begin to focus mainly on the plot of the present.
> 
> Ps: The name of the Rogare family sword is Truth.
> 
> Hope you like it :)

Ghael stayed up late with her finishing the document to be delivered to Rhaegar and Tywin tonight, detailing all the conditions of both parties for the gold loan that her family will make to the king. Despite having only slept a couple of hours, Jaenara finds herself unable to fall asleep again.

When she began planning her trip to King’s Landing, she never imagined that upon reaching her destination she would find so many new possibilities. Tywin's proposal has been racking her head for the past two days.

If Dorne thinks of rebelling, she knows that one of the instigators of this rebellion must be Oberyn. Her brother's spirit has always been free and wild, the weight of not having to be the leader of Dorne by not being the eldest son gave him the ability to do whatever he wanted even if their mother objected. She remembers that many nights he entered her room to say goodbye because he was leaving the house to travel to distant lands. He could be on the other side of the world, but he sent her letters telling her of his adventures. She envied that her brother had the opportunity to do whatever he wanted, even if everyone was opposed to the idea or the land he was traveling to was an unknown place. Nothing stopped him, but now everything is different, a war can bring down even the most cunning man and Oberyn is not immortal.

Jaenara does not have the need to establish an alliance with House Lannister, especially if it is with Tywin Lannister himself, that man is capable of anything to get what he wants, in addition to being an opportunist, but she still does not understand how he got to an alliance with House Martell, how her brothers are trusting him.

She gets out of bed and sneaks up to the trunk where she keeps the dragon egg. She takes it in her hands and carries it to the rug in front of the fireplace. Lately she finds herself with the inexplicable need to throw it into the flames and see what happens; maybe he will hatch and can gift a real dragon to Princess Daenerys for her birthday. She wonders what the princess would think, without a doubt she would become her favorite person. The little girl's eyes shine when she talks about them.

Jaenara only hopes that this fascination for them does not turn into an obsession as it was for some of her ancestors and wastes her life in search of something that simply no longer exists.

She lies down on the carpet and together with the dragon egg she watches the wood burn in the same way that her thoughts burn her.

…..

She hadn't contemplated returning to the courtyard for training so soon, but her head didn't leave her alone and Jaenara thought a couple hours of archery might help her clear her mind.

Now that she knows that Ezzara is Lyanna's spy and also that the reason Ghael hadn't been able to discover anything strange about her is because her room has a secret passageway that she can get out of without being seen, Jaenara has paid more attention to the maid and has realized that since the first day they did not start in the best way, Ezzara's strategy is now different. She tries to do exactly what Jaenara asks of her without being too nosy, but Ezzara watches her closely and pays attention to what she is talking to Ihrra.

When Larra introduced her to the two servants, she did so a few days before the trip. She didn't pay much attention to them and now she regrets it as if she had, she would have immediately realized that something was wrong with Ezzara, as happened when they chatted on the ship.

Rhaegar once told her that the Red Keep was full of secret passages that led to unexpected places even under the beds. That's why Jaenara has gone through all the spaces in the room she's in, she's sure there must be one but so far she hasn't been able to figure out where.

Jaenara is so distracted thinking about how to decipher the situation of Ezzara and the passageways that she did not pay much attention to it before reaching the courtyard. As she has been here so many times before she just let her memory and her feet carry her.

Which is why it was too late when she realized that apart from a few knights in the yard, Rhaegar was also training with Arthur.

As if her day couldn't have gotten even worse.

Both men see her arrive and Arthur is the first to stop and greet her. "Good morning my lady"

"Arthur, Your Grace" she says with a small bow of her head.

Rhaegar dresses very differently than she had seen in the previous days, he only wears a tunic and breeches, he seems carefree, and his eyes sparkle with the adrenaline of combat "Lady Jaenara”.

"I was coming to practice a little archery, so if you'll excuse me, gentlemen”. She accelerates her pace towards the armory when she feels Rhaegar trying to catch up with her. She knows there is nothing to be gained by trying to evade him, so she stops her walk.

"My lady” He says breathlessly, "I was hoping we could practice together, if you agree, of course”.

"And while we practice do you want to try to sweeten my heart into accepting your proposal?" She gives him a confident smile.

He laughs out loud as the weak rays of the morning sun caress his face making him look younger. Jaenara's own smile falters for a moment, it may seem like a minor detail but he used to laugh a lot at the beginning of their marriage. She wonders if Lyanna has ever made him laugh like this in all these years. “You are a very cunning woman, my lady. Maybe we should let a competition decide?”

"You know I'm very good at archery, your grace, I don't see how you could beat me”.

"Has my lady ever practiced with a sword?"

“Not much, at home my father has the sword of the Rogare family, Truth, and we practiced a couple of times but the truth is I’m not very good”.

"So we both have a weak point if we compete in both”. He reaches out to shake her hand.

What Jaenara does not tell Rhaegar before accepting is that she only practiced a couple of times with the sword because when she took it and they started the practice something was triggered in her mind and they could never finish because Jaenara only saw that last day in Red Keep and it took hours to get her out of the dark place where her mind stayed.

"Was it your father who taught you archery too, my lady?" Rhaegar says as they walk towards the courtyard where the targets are located.

"No, my mother"

"Your parents seem like quite special people" His voice sounds sweet but Jaenara turns to see him and can see his expression of longing and it is that if you compare both parents they could not be more opposite especially Aerys and Lysandro, and although Rhaella was a lovely woman you could see in her face the suffering caused by her marriage to her brother. The last times she saw her she seemed to lose her light more and more.

"They are, my father is a tough but fair man, with a slightly different humor...” She laughs a little at the memory "And my mother is sweet but fierce at the same time”.

"I suppose now I understand where you got all your attributes my lady”.

She doesn't respond, but smiles in his direction as her hand tightens on the bow she is holding. The only good thing about everything that happened was that Larra found her; she and Lysandro gave her a home without asking for anything in return. Anyone else knowing that she was the true queen of the seven kingdoms would have used her in some way, but they respected her decisions, helped her heal, and when she told them about her revenge plans, they were by her side every step she took.

"So whoever manages to get closer to the center with the arrow has the right to choose the topic of conversation”. She prepares to be the first to shoot her arrow at the target.

"Good luck my lady"

"Success. Your grace" She looks at him before launching her arrow "Luck is the losers' excuse to justify a defeat" Her arrow hits right in the center of the target as expected. Larra is an excellent teacher and Jaenara absorbed all her knowledge.

When it is Rhaegar's turn it is very difficult for him to improve what she did, his closest possibility is that it is equal to hers, but they would still be tied. When he makes his shot it is quite good but not better than Jaenara's.

He groans and turns to see her "Well, my lady, I accept my defeat" He put the archery implements aside "As promised. I am an open book”.

Jaenara only thinks about the desire she has to go back to her room and not be forced to have to pretend that Rhaegar's company does not bother her when it is the opposite. Every minute she spends with him smiling and answering her questions annoys her.

"Do I have to claim my victory now?"

"As you wish” He shrugs his shoulders.

"Then I'll make it more interesting by collecting my prize when I see fit”.

He nods and she feels relieved, now only the sword fight remains and this morning will finally end.

As Jaenara insists that she does not have many skills with the sword, they decide to use the practice swords in addition to changing the rules of combat, in this case they will only try to touch the other opponent's cheek with the tip of the sword without such direct attacks and if in some moment she feels uncomfortable the combat stops.

The weight of the sword despite being wooden is heavy, she feels her hands sweat and tries to calm her breathing. It is just a silly game.

"Lady Jaenara, ready?"

_No_

"Yes"

Rhaegar makes the first attack; it is only a small attempt to touch her face with the sword without trying too hard which Jaenara manages to dodge. Her breathing becomes even more agitated, she feels disoriented for a second, she tries to focus on the situation and tries to attack Rhaegar with her sword but when she looks in his direction she cannot tell where he is exactly. He seems to realize this because she hears him ask in a worried voice if she's okay.

"I…." She cannot breathe and falls to the ground dropping her sword.

"Jaenara!" He runs to her side and when his hand touches her arm, she leans back trying to avoid being touched again.

"I ... I'm sorry your grace," she says trying to calm down and remind herself that nothing that her mind sees now is real. If it was, Rhaegar wouldn't be here with her.

"Is alright...Let me take you back to your room”. He approaches again as a man would to an injured animal and tries to take her arm again, this time she lets him do it, not because she wants to but because she must. This Rhaegar in front of her wouldn't understand why she doesn't want him to touch her; he thinks he's in front of Jaenara Rogare, not Elia Martell.

"It's not necessary, I just need to get some air and I'll be fine." The courtyard where archery is practiced is quite far from where the rest of the men train and they decided to do both competitions in it, so luckily for Jaenara no one is paying much attention to her situation.

They both sit on the ground next to each other as she catches her breath and it is at that moment that anger overwhelms her inside and makes her wish Rhaegar would see all the pain he caused her, all the helplessness, the grief, sadness that she has in her heart thanks to him. Although she cannot reveal the true facts, she can disguise them in such a way that he thinks about what he did years ago.

Once her father told her that _"for a lie to be credible it must be based on a truth"_ and so she begins to tell her story.

"I was pregnant years ago, twins." Since Rhaegar is next to her, she can't see the expression on his face “I met a man, we fell in love. It was strange because we weren't supposed to fall in love or at least we never expected it, we were different but somehow I felt that it made us stronger”. She can't stop her eyes from filling with tears “I got pregnant and we were both very happy until I had the accident I told you about the other day at breakfast. The lake near my house is beautiful and I wanted to go there, so I was on my way to the stable to look for my horse, but my father was arriving in his and he told me why I did not occupy his horse because he would no longer need it”. She looks out over the knights' training yard and sees Arthur look in the direction where they are both sitting with an interested expression. “My father had his sword, Truth, tied to the saddle of the horse and I paid no attention to it. After a while the horse stumbled and fell with me, I hurt my leg with the sword and also because of the way I fell I lost the baby’s”. She feels a lump in her throat "As a result of the same fall I cannot have more children”. The wind blows strong and a couple of clouds cover the sky "It was there that my _beloved_ showed his true face, he did not even wait for me to recover from my injuries when he already had another, a younger one, one that could give him all the children he would like”. Jaenara's left hand feels cold “I have never been able to forget that day and every time I pick up a sword I just...I can't”.

Tears fall free on Jaenara's face when she hears him say “I'm sorry”.

"No, you don't”. She finally dares to look at him and when she does; a part of her rejoices to see that her story brought him down. “You can't feel it because you didn't experience it, you didn't go through it, and you don't know everything I had to do to survive after that loss. We can try to put ourselves in someone else's shoes, your grace, but all hearts are unique as pain is also unique”.

The only thing she wants now is to go to her room but when she tries to get up something stops her and that is when Jaenara realizes the reason why she only felt cold in one hand is because her other hand and Rhaegar's are intertwined.

She reacts quickly, she lets go and apologizes even though she doesn't really know if it was she or he who intertwined them. She gets up quickly and starts cleaning her dress from the dust.

Rhaegar still seems affected by the story she told him, no doubt he found similarities to his own life. So he just asks if she needs something, and having a negative answer, they both decide to take different paths. He stays with Arthur and she returns to her room.

As she walks through the corridors of the Red Keep, think about what happened. She is not a weak woman, no anymore, but Rhaegar brings out the worst in her. If he thinks he can win her favor in some way, he is wrong.

He is not going to destroy her like in the past.

…..

Jaenara had breakfast in her room in her attempt to avoid Rhaegar at least for today, she sent a message with Ihrra where she apologized for being absent but that she did not feel very well, nothing serious so they would not worry but she believes that the king should have intuited that her sudden "illness" has to do with what happened in the morning.

Now she goes to see Ghael when she sees Princess Daenerys Targaryen come walking with two ladies accompanying her.

"Lady Jaenara, are you okay?" the worried girl asks.

"Yes princess, I just think I'm catching a cold, but I think it's because I went out to the courtyard very early"

"Aunt Lyanna said the morning was very cold today"

Jaenara smiles at her but now more than ever feels alert, Lyanna Stark follows her every move.

"Princess the septa await you for her class," says one of the maids who accompanies her.

Daenerys's face reveals her dislike for her class, so Jaenara decides to end her misery.

"Princess, I thought we could walk around the garden and get to know each other better”.

The girl looks at the lady behind her, not knowing how to respond, although her eyes reveal that the idea interests her much more than going with the septa.

"The princess must take all her classes; they are orders from the king”.

“I'm sure the king won't be upset if she is absent just for today. You can tell him that Jaenara Rogare is to blame for her absence”. Jaenara gives the lady a smile and although she continues to look at her with the same hateful face, she tells the other lady accompanying her to go and tell the septa that the princess will be busy for today.

"Despite agreeing to your request, Lady Rogare, I cannot leave the princess alone, so I will accompany her”.

"Of course lady..."

"Alarra Velaryon"

"Thank you Lady Alarra, you are very kind”.

Jaenara and Princess Daenerys walk through the beautiful gardens of the Red Keep while Alarra walks behind them but paying attention to their every word from what Jaenara has noticed. An idea forms in her head. Jaenara falls to the ground touching her ankle and emits a groan.

"Lady Jaenara!" The princess kneels next to her without knowing what to do or what happened.

"I think I sprained my ankle. Lady Alarra, can you go get help? I don't think I can get up”.

"Of course my lady" She gestures to Daenerys "Come on princess”.

The girl is about to stand up but Jaenara takes her by the hand. “The princess can stay here, we won't move I promise, so you can go faster, I'm really in a lot of pain” She continues to complain.

The lady thinks about it a bit. "Okay. I'll go find the maester”.

When Jaenara can no longer see Alarra, she quickly gets up from the ground and the princess says “Let's go. Run!"

"But... your ankle..."

Jaenara smiles "Don't you want to be a rebellious princess for a day?"

The girl's response is to take her hand and run alongside her laughing.

They both reach the end of the garden and stop to take a breath “Do you know a place where we can hide for a while?”

“Rhaegar's greenhouse… he doesn't know that I know the secret passageway he has in the middle of the bushes, but sometimes when I know he won't be there, I go and hang out. It's quiet and makes me feel ... good”.

"Maybe not a good idea... your brother could go there today" That was not her plan when she thought about getting rid of Alarra.

“Not today, I heard he would be with Jon in the afternoon. Let's go".

And this is how Jaenara stands at the door of the Greenhouse where Rhaegar keeps the figs. As if her days couldn't bring any more negative surprises.

Although she must admit that it is beautiful, being there is like being in a completely different place. It gives you a strange feeling of peace.

“Come” The princess leads her through the small trees full of figs until she reaches the center of the greenhouse. If Jaenara believed that the plantation was beautiful, the pattern of the ceiling glass in the center is even more, there is a drawing on them, it is a kind of dragon with outstretched wings but it seems to be on fire... as if the flames of the sun were burning it.

"You look like my brother Lady Jaenara”.

She snaps out of her stupor "Why do you say so?"

"He spends hours’ looking at that drawing on the glass and his gaze is always as if ... I don't know…it was the first time he had looked at it”. The girl says, leaning back on the cushions that are on the floor.

Jaenara does the same and they are together in silence for a moment contemplating the beautiful drawings on the glass until the girl breaks the silence again "Do you think there is a place where people who are no longer with us go, my Lady?"

"I don't know princess ... I hope so" Jaenara hopes to be reunited with her children one day. She turns to see the girl looking thoughtfully at the ceiling "Why do you ask?"

“I wish I had met my mother, even my father… although everyone says he was crazy” She bites her lip nervously “Neither Rhaegar nor Aunt Lyanna like to talk about the past but sometimes Visy tells me stories….” Her violet eyes look at her sadly “My brothers argue all the time, they think I don't realize it but I do it especially now that Viserys wants to live permanently in Dragonstone and wants to take me with him”.

"And what do you want princess?"

"Dany ... can you tell me Dany lady Jaenara"

“What do you want ... Dany?” Jaenara says with a smile on her face and her heart melts at the girl's request to call her by the name her family calls her.

_If she only knew......that I am her aunt. Her real aunt._

“Honestly ... I love Rhaegar with all my heart, he is the person who taught me everything, to walk, the first word I said was Rhegar” She laughs a little “When I learned that my mother had died in childbirth and I thought it was my fault, he did his best to make me realize it wasn't”.

“But…”

“But Dragonstone feels like home. Viserys has taken me many times over the years and I feel like we belong there. I feel happy”

Jaenara takes the girl's hand and with the other catches a tear that was about to fall. "If that makes you happy, the king will surely understand”.

"I would like to divide myself in two”. Dany's sobs are so intense that Jaenara can't help but draw her into her body and stroke her hair while letting her vent.

While Jaenara waits for her to calm down, she carefully looks at the drawing on the ceiling, the color patterns are really beautiful, it is fascinating and strange at the same time, she does not remember seeing such a drawing before, it looks like a sigil of a House, but at the same time unless it is a new one, no House in Westeros occupies dragons in its sigils only the Targaryens or some old house of Valyrian descent.

“Sorry to ruin your dress my lady” Dany looks at her with her red and puffy eyes.

"It doesn't matter, princess" She gets up to sit down with the girl still in her arms. "We must come back later or they will start to worry" The girl nods and wipes her tears.

Before leaving the greenhouse, Jaenara takes one last look at the burning dragon on the roof.

…..

“I'm sure Lady Alarra must be furious”.

“Although I don't know her, I think Lady Alarra is furious even when she sleeps”.

“Dany!” They both turn to look at the queen running in their direction with two knights and Lady Alarra behind her. When she arrives in front of them, her face is concerned and she takes Dany's face to examine it. "We thought something had happened”. She looks at Jaenara "Lady Alarra said that you had suffered a fall in the garden".

“It wasn't as bad as I thought. The truth is that in a few minutes I didn't have much pain-”

“My lady, you said you couldn't walk” Alarra interrupts.

“I was in a lot of pain, but then I got up and the truth is that as I walked I felt better and better, it was just the scare”. The lady looks at the queen and for a second Jaenara thinks she will continue talking but she must have seen something in the eyes of the queen since she just says “At least it was nothing serious, my lady”.

We look for you everywhere, Lady Jaenara. You can't disappear like that with the princess but I suppose it's normal for you since the customs in Essos are… different. A little wild for my taste”. The queen and Alarra look at each other and laugh a little.

“Don't you like to dress like a knight and participate in tournaments?” That erases the queen's smile in an instant. “A bit cowardly for my taste”. She walks up to the queen until she is in front of her "I don't need to dress up to enter a tournament if I wanted to because my father and mother would be the first to cheering for me in the crowd”. She turns her face to the little girl “I look forward to another walk with you Dany. I had a lot of Fun”.

“Me too, and thank you Lady Jaenara”.

Janeara winks at her and leaves the hall without looking back at the queen or saying goodbye to her.

Her father told her that she must win over the king's trusted people.

At least he's not here to see the horrible job she's done on it.

…..

Ghael is sitting at the foot of Jaenara's bed closing the envelopes where he will carry Tywin and Rhaegar's contracts while she is sitting at the window watching the stars peek into the sky.

"My lady"

"Mmhm."

"You look sad"

"Don't worry about me, Ghael. I think I just miss our home”. Although it is only part of the truth, it is no less important. She wishes Larra and Lysandro were here. They sure know what to do.

"Maybe I can help you with that”. She turns to see him and sees that the boy has a letter in his hand with the seal of the Rogare family. "They gave it to me in the afternoon." He says with a wide smile.

She quickly gets up, takes his hands and hugs him. "Thanks Ghael"

"You're welcome my lady. I'll leave you and I'll go deliver the contracts”.

Once Ghael has gone to the room, she begins to read:

_Dear Jaenara._

_Nothing is the same since your departure, the sun in our house shines less every day. We look forward to the day when you return to us._

_How is business at Kings Landing? We expect news about that._

_Your birthday will be soon and together with your mother we send you a gift that we are sure you will love._

_With all the love in the world,_

_Mom and Dad._

Jaenara hugs the paper against her chest and lies down on the bed closing her eyes. She falls asleep between tears and with the feeling of being lost without them.

Several knocks on the door wake her up, it must be very late because Jaenara sees that all the candles have gone out and the room is only illuminated by the light of the moon. She wakes up a bit disoriented and puzzled by the situation.

They knock on the door again urgently while Jaenara leaves her parents letter in a drawer and puts on a robe. Before going to open it, she takes a small knife that she brought with her in one of the trunks and carries it in her left hand. You can't be sure what will happen in a place like this.

She walks to the door and asks "Who is there?" Nobody answers and they simply knock on the door this time softer than the previous times.

Her hand grabs the doorknob and as soon as she put her hand in it, the person outside pushes the door open and rushes inside. Before Jaenara can use her knife, she notices the blonde hair and when her eyes focus on her face she realizes that it is Rhaegar Targaryen who entered her room.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm here for this, Lady Jaenara" He says showing her the document he sent him through Ghael.

"And you couldn't wait until tomorrow, your grace; this is definitely not the time to talk business”.

“I was thinking about waiting, but I couldn't sleep. The truth is that I really don't know if it's a joke on your part, my lady, or if you really believe that the insanity written here is possible”.

"Excuse me." She throws the knife on the bed and adjusts the robe covering herself well with it.

He leans his back against the wall by the door. "You are not only asking for the return of the gold but also that the Rogare family be an investor in the gold mine that we are going to exploit and benefit from a part of the production”.

"I don't see how that could be unfair to the crown”.

"Of course not Jaenara." He walk towards her until he is as close as possible without invading her personal space. “What bothers me the most is the fact that you want to own half of the Red Keep. That is definitely the most absurd thing”.

“As I mentioned to you at the meeting, Rhaegar, the amount of gold you are asking for is very high. As you see for the welfare of your kingdom, I do it for the interests of my House. We make these types of contracts all the time with the lords of Essos”.

“I cannot give you the half of the Red Keep that is out of negotiation. That would be like naming you Queen”.

"It's just to ensure payment, if you read it clearly; it says that once the debt is paid, the Keep will be yours again”.

"Yes, and it also says that if for some reason I do not pay the debt, it would belong entirely to the Rogare family”.

“Take it as an incentive. A pressure method if you want. But our position is not going to change”. She looks at him defiantly “We don't need you, if we don't carry out our business, I can go out that door and go to Essos and my life will continue the same. Will yours still be the same Rhaegar?”

"How can you be two different women on the same day?" Rhaegar's voice is so low, as if he wants to prevent anyone from hearing what he says even though no one else is in the room, just the two of them "Today, in the morning..-"

“The fact that I have told you a passage from my life does not mean that we are friends. I don't know you and you don't know me. We are just two strangers who shared a story”. Although Jaenara refers to their morning conversation, she cannot help but think that in the past more than a story they shared a life.

The air becomes thick and she can almost feel it reaching her lungs, like flames rushing through her body and every time she breathes it burns a little more.

“The eyes sometimes reveal what words cannot. But yours are a mystery, my Lady, sometimes I think they are kind, others warm, others a storm passes through them and others.....others are like now, challenging”.

"If the eyes speak, yours do too"

"And what they say?" He whispers.

"That you are a desperate man with a kingdom falling apart and that although you came here to claim for the contract that you consider unfair, you know that it is your only way out”. Jaenara realizes that he is walking her backwards. Suddenly her back feels cold and now he has her cornered against the wall.

"I will not sign this".

"Don't do it, I already told you that nothing is going to change for me, it's just business and I have nothing to lose" _And a lot to gain._

"I was wrong about you" She listens as he drops the envelope with the document and falls to the ground. He rests his hand firmly on the wall next to her face and looks at her with fiery violet eyes. “The Red Keep is the legacy of my family; it is more than a structure it is where good and bad kings lived. It is the last place where I was with my children and….Elia. I'm not going to let your family take away from me the only place where I can remember them because they are not even here, I let them be buried in Dorne because I had no right to claim anything after what I did”. Rhaegar is taller than her and his face is now only inches from hers. "I can't let you have the only thing I have of them”.

“That has nothing to do with our business. If you have made mistakes in the past, they are yours, not mine. For me, this place is just a property, a means to an end. As I told you the first time, if you are trying to earn my favor in any way, this is unfortunately not the way”. She places her hand on Rhaegar's chest and slowly pushes him away from her. "Now if you'll excuse me, I think it's time for you to go”.

The king's shoulders shrug and he seems dejected from the conversation, his blond hair covering his face and he rubs his hands over it and groans. Finally he speaks again "You are right Lady Jaenara, sorry to interrupt you at this time. See you tomorrow at the meeting”.

He turns to leave, but Jaenara sees that he left the contract and reminds him to take it with him before he leaves.

“It is not necessary. I already know it by heart”.

“It is not for you to read. It's for when you have to sign it”.

He gives a wry laugh "Don't be so sure, my lady”. Rhaegar looks at her one last time before leaving.

When Jaenara is sure he has gotten far enough away, she grabs her knife and begins to rip the fabrics that cover her bed with such force that she is sure her thrusts have passed beyond the fabric. But she can't stop. By what right does Rhaegar think he can come to her room to demand things and also talk about her children and feel pain for their loss when he was partly responsible for it? Rhaenys missed him so much when he left and the day she died she hid under his bed thinking he would come to rescue her, Jaenara heard her say his name. She heard her call him but he never came.

Jaenara only stops when her hands and mind are so tired that she can no longer go on and falls to the ground crying.

…..

_-Dorne, weeks before the battle of the Trident-_

_The place where he agreed to meet the Prince of Dorne is on the outskirts of the Prince's Pas. That he agreed to this meeting is a miracle, but Rhaegar insisted a lot on the ravens he sent._

_"Rhaegar" he can't quite turn around when he feels Oberyn Martell's fist on his face so hard that he loses his balance and falls to the sand. "I am here only for my sister, my nephew and my niece but if the message you sent me is false I promise you that I will go to Tower of Joy, open the belly of the bitch Stark and leave the puppy in the streets of Dorne for the snakes to feed on him"._

_"I guess I wasn't as subtle about my arrival as I thought” he says, getting up._

_“We know you've been here since day one, but since our mother died and Doran took power, things have changed. He forbade me to go near because Elia is in Kings Landing with your crazy father and if something happens to you, he could retaliate with her". He gives her a smile that is not very friendly. “I was inclined to take you hostage, kill your whore, and demand that our sister return to Dorne with her children. I can't say I didn't try. So you have my brother to thank for that, Rhaegar"._

_"I didn't come here to argue, I just need your help" he tries to reconcile with the prince._

_The prince of Dorne's expression turns gloomy "I told my mother not to marry Eli to you, I repeated it a thousand times but she did not listen because she was blinded by vengeance and power”. He spits at Rhaegar's feet. “I even tried to get Eli to escape with me to Essos, months before the marriage. I just wanted her to be happy, to have a family. I always knew that a coward like you couldn't give it to her and I wasn't wrong”._

_"Oberyn I…-"_

_“I want them to come home. For that alone I accepted this meeting”. His eyes betray his hard expression and Rhaegar realizes the worry and sadness he feels inside. "What is your plan to get them out of Kings Landing?”_

_“In a few days I will be marching to Kings Landing to lead the army to the Trident, when I arrive I will speak to Elia and tell her that there will be a boat waiting for her at dawn on the day of the battle. I will find a way to inform Jaime Lannister to accompany her when the time comes for her and the children. He will travel with them on the boat and then on the ship that will take them to Dorne to protect them in case of any eventuality, he is one of the best knights. I entrust my life to him”._

_"And what is my part in this whole plan?"_

_“If Robert wins and when he gets to Red Keep my family is not there, the first place they will come is Dorne. You must be prepared”._

_Oberyn laughs bitterly, puzzling Rhaegar. "Your family? You lost the right to call them family when you thought with the head that you had down there”._

_Rhaegar knows that he cannot explain to Oberyn why he did what he did. There are days when he can't explain it himself, he just keeps the faith that this is the right path or at least the one he should follow. There is a fine line between what you want and what you need to do. Perhaps duty is not what you want but the prophecy is written, his actions were necessary._

_Or at least that's what he tells himself every night before trying to sleep to ease the guilt and shame. But also not to think about what he did to Elia, to his children, about how he is probably going to die without ever having seen one last time that special smile that Elia gave him at the beginning of their marriage when they were both happy._

_"I only ask that when you see her you can deliver this to her”. He takes the letter he wrote to her out of his pocket._

_Oberyn looks at the paper and looks at him "If it's not an annulment of your marriage to her, then I'm not going to give her fucking anything”._

_"Please"_

_The prince snatches the paper from Rhaegar's hand and shoves it into his pocket. “Once Elia gets to Dorne, you know I won't let her go. No matter what my brother says, I am capable of declaring war on all of Westeros._ _My nephew and my niece will grow up here in Dorne and will be prince and princess”. He walks towards the dragon prince and looks at him as if he wants to discover his soul “You will not see them again, not even if you had a dragon and arrived demanding that they return with you. You know what happened to the last Targaryen who came here to try to take something that wasn't hers”. Oberyn says alluding to Rhaenys Targaryen and her dragon Meraxes._

_"I know”_

_….._

_As Rhaegar is about to reach the Tower of Joy, he pauses in his footsteps and gazes up at the clear sky of Dorne. Oberyn is right, he will never see Elia or her children again, but not only because Dorne would not allow it, but because he will die in the battle of the trident. He does not know exactly how or when, but his death is imminent._

_Having to make the decision to betray the vows that he swore when he married Elia was difficult but it was necessary, in the future the world will need his children to restore peace in the seven kingdoms and if he has to sacrifice his happiness and his life, so be it._

_He just hopes that Oberyn delivers the letter to Elia; it may take her time to read it because he is not her favorite person but he hopes that at least in a few years she can do it and know how much it hurt him to leave her._

_He was a coward who could never tell her that he fell in love with her because he knew that if he did he could not let her go._

_….._

“If you continue like this, we will be left without a training yard”.

Rhaegar doesn't stop and continues to mercilessly attack the imaginary opponent in front of him.

"Can I at least know how long have you been here?"

The king of the seven kingdoms drops the training sword with force and turns to see Arthur "I think most of the night”. The commander looks at him and raises an eyebrow. "It's just ... that woman!" Rhaegar says, pacing back and forth in a frustrated way "It's totally unbearable, one minute she shares an episode of her life in such a deep way and I feel like ... we connect, I see my pain reflected in her ... and then she sends me a contract where she practically wants to own the air I breathe”. He groans.

"I guess we're not talking about Lyanna"

"No, no Lyanna ... I'm talking about Jaenara Rogare”.

Arthur walks over to Rhaegar and puts his hand on his shoulder. "Because we are friends, I'm going to give you some advice. Do not do anything stupid”.

"What do you mean" Says the King a little puzzled.

"Lady Jaenara is a beautiful woman..-” Before he can continue speaking the king stops him "Arthur, I know where you are going with that and there is nothing further from the truth. You don't have to worry”.

"I hope so".


	7. Come Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Brienne is 20 years old.  
> \- Lewyn Martell is known to have had a paramoure in his time serving as a knight, so he is not buried in Dorne. He asked Rhaegar that if he died in battle, his body woul be given to her.  
> -The last sentence that Jaenara says to Rhaegar at the end of their encounter is very similar to the one in Elia's memory in chapter four. I mention it in case someone wants to read it again and see the similarities and know why it provokes the reaction it provokes in him.
> 
> I hope you like the chapter and if you want, you can leave a comment :)

The tension can be felt at the table where the three most powerful people in Kings Landing are at the moment.

Jaenara Rogare, Rhaegar Targaryen and Tywin Lannister.

Jaenara was only able to sleep for a couple of hours. After Rhaegar left her room and when she woke up, she saw all the damage she had caused. She called Ghael and together they came up with a plan to replace the bedding and mattress that were totally destroyed. When he came to the room, he looked at the bed and only asked how he could help her.

Jaenara begins to suspect that Ghael is realizing that they traveled to Kings Landing for more than business or at least that there must be a reason for her erratic behaviors of the past few days.

Maybe one day she will tell him the story, he is a smart boy and she knows he would not judge her, but at least for now, the fewer people involved, the better.

As Jaenara knows the location in the castle of the bedding and mattresses for each of the rooms, she only told Ghael that that he had to go get them without being seen. Together they were able to change everything in time before the maid came to tidy up the bedroom.

“Lady Jaenara” Tywin gets her attention. "With the king we have read the contract that you sent us in detention, and we talked about it earlier today”.

"And what is your decision”. She says impatiently, snapping her fingers on the wood of the table.

“It seems like a reasonable contract to us _”. Lie, lie, otherwise Rhaegar wouldn't have come to my room the way he did._ "However, we cannot sign it”.

She watches both men. Rhaegar looks at Jaenara with the same angry eyes he used to look at her in the room last night but Tywin seems a bit amused by the situation.

She arches an eyebrow and smiles "You Westeros people are really...interesting”. She knows she can't seem defeated or overly interested in getting Rhaegar to sign, but if he doesn't, all her sacrifices will be in vain. “It seems to me that more than not being able to, you don't want to sign it. But I understand, a king must not bow down or he would appear weak”. She looks at Rhaegar with what she hopes is an expression of confidence.

"I also find you quite interesting, Lady Rogare, but that has nothing to do with our negotiations”. He takes a piece of paper from inside the table drawer and hands it to her. "We wish to renegotiate the terms”.

Jaenara takes the document and begins to read it; most of what was written in hers is present in it with the difference of the last point, which refers to the clause in case of non-payment. The contract that Rhaegar gave her modifies this point by saying that in case that House Targaryen cannot pay the full debt in one year; half of Red Keep will belong to House Rogare forever, as long as it joins House Targaryen through a marriage.

"A marriage?" The only heir to the Hose Rogare is her, besides her father's brother who is still alive; the only option of marriage is her. "Unless you have a brother hidden somewhere far away, you want me as a wife for your son who is barely old enough to wield a sword or you want to marry me to your brother, which I doubt very much, I cannot imagine who this marriage could be with”.

Rhaegar looks confident for the first time and that makes her nervous "Normally in these cases it would be a marriage between our children, but that option is impossible, and as you mentioned very well my lady, all possibilities are exhausted”. She looks suspiciously at Tywin thinking that perhaps he convinced the king that a marriage between House Rogare and House Lannister would also benefit the seven kingdoms in some way, but his face gives no indication that this is so. "Then, after extensive discussion with the High Septon, and consulting it with my hand, we came to the conclusion that it would be possible for me to take a second wife”.

Time stops for Jaenara, she just can't believe what she's hearing; maybe she's still sleeping in her room having a nightmare?

“You mean your third wife, your grace. In case you forgot the first one. Elia Martell”.

She's glad to see that she was at least able to wipe Rhaegar's confidence off his face. Jaenara takes the paper Rhaegar gave her and tears it in half. "I already told you before and I repeat it again, your grace, I don't need you, you need me”. She rises from her seat and looks at him from above while he is sitting. “I would never marry a man who cannot keep his promises. Or did you not promise the princess of Dorne to care for her, love her and protect her?”

He quickly gets up from his seat and grabs her left arm tightly. “You don't know anything about Elia. I forbid you to talk about her”.

_I am Elia._

She rips her arm out of his grip "The truth is like the sun, even if you try to hide it, it is always there". They both look at each other defiant “The truth hurts, your grace, but it is no less real for that. If the years have not taught you that; you have not learned anything”. The lump in Jaenara's throat makes her breathe hard. "What do you expect of me after a proposal like that or did you think I'd be flattered by it?"

"I am not interested in how you feel, my lady, this marriage is just a formality, if once married you then want to live the rest of your life in Essos, please do so; it would do me a great favor not to have to see you again”. The king's pale skin reddens from the contained rage "I already told you, you are not going to take away the only thing I have, even if for that I have to marry a woman like you”.

"A woman like me?"

"Arrogant. Power hungry, able to do whatever it takes to show she has power over everyone”.

Before Jaenara can respond, Tywin stands up and rattles the old wooden chair. "If you want, I can withdraw so you can discuss in peace”.

She looks at him and says "I will not accept any more disrespect in this place" Jaenara turns her gaze towards Rhaegar "You have until tonight, if you have not changed your mind then I will prepare my ship to sail towards Essos as soon as possible”.

She is steps from the door when she hears Rhaegar say “Same here my lady. If there is no agreement on your part, you can prepare your ship to return to your home in Essos”.

She turns her head "One day in the future, maybe years later you'll come crawling on your knees asking me to make you a proposal like this again, and you know what I'm going to do?" She knows that Rhaegar recognizes the words because his gaze is as if he is seeing her for the first time, as if he cannot understand what he hears. “I'm going to let you sink into the crap that you created”.

It feels good to bury the dagger in his heart even though he thinks she is someone else who just randomly chose the same words. Rhaegar tries to walk towards her but she sees Tywin subtly take his arm and whisper something in his ear.

When leaving the room, her ladies-in-waiting Ezzara and Ihrra wait for her with a coat so that she can protect herself from the cold. Their heels clatter on the ground and it seems that the closer they get to the garden the louder they get.

In the distance, she sees Lyanna who has a smile on her face as she looks at Jon, who appears to be with the master-at-arms training with small daggers. Before their gazes meet, Jaenara looks up to see the Targaryen flag waving wildly in the strong wind. The three-headed dragon seems to come to life in this weather, but suddenly a ray of sunlight peeks through one of the clouds and is reflected on the flag.

It is in this revealing moment, in which the rays of the sun caress the dragon, that she realizes what the drawing on the roof of Rhaegar's greenhouse means.

She was right, it was a Sigil.

The dragon consumed by the flames of the sun is a mixture of the sigil of House Targaryen and Martell.

Her gaze returns to the garden and finally meets the young queen's eyes.

She is so tired that for a moment, just for a moment, she stops being Jaenara and thinks about how she loved her long wavy hair, her eyes despite being very common reflected truth, sincerity, not like now that they are always cautious and distrustful, the scent of her children waking up in the morning, going to the garden with them and playing until Rhaenys got tired of her brother's inability to keep quiet and always ended up angry about finding them so easily or even the afternoons she spent with Ashara talking about how much they missed Dorne.

Lyanna Stark hasn't taken her eyes off Jaenara during her internal monologue; something must be reflected in the face of the heiress Rogare because the young queen rises from her seat angrily and enters the Red Keep with her ladies.

"My lady, are you alright?" Ihrra asks putting a hand on her arm.

She finally realizes her mistake. She doesn't have to pretend to be Jaenara Rogare. She is Jaenara Rogare. But she is also Elia Martell.

She is both; the pain that she thought was from Elia is from Jaenara, Larra is her mother, Lysandro is her father, but Oberyn and Doran are also her brothers.

Essos is her home as Dorne is.

Jaenara just smiles like she hasn't done it in a long time. "Better than ever”.

…..

Cobwebs and dust make it difficult to breathe in the tunnel, but she has had to cross it so many times that she is able to tolerate it. Lately the queen is pressing her more and more for information that is useful, and for the first time she has something really interesting. Fortune finally smiles on her.

The first day on the ship she thought it would be easier to win over the heiress Rogare, she tried to get closer to her as she had done with the other highborn ladies she had served before, but lady Rogare turned out to be very smart. She has not been able to gain her trust in the way she hoped, but she has gained the trust of the guard who is guarding the floor where her room is located.

It has been a good strategy, she must admit it, it gives her the information she need and he is also very handsome. They have a good time together.

Life was difficult for a person like her who, unlike Jaenara who always had everything, grew up in a brothel in Lyss where she was forced to work since she was old enough for clients to notice her. Some of the men or women asked for unimaginable things, but if she refused for any reason, the punishment she received was even worse.

When she was old enough to understand that everything she had learned there could be used to her advantage, she convinced one of the men who came regularly to seek her services to buy her from the brothel owner, promising that once he did, she would be his exclusive lover. The man was married but he always complained that he did not like his wife and that she was more concerned about their children, the house, than to please him, so it was easy for her to deceive him.

Once she was free, she changed the name they gave her in the brothel, Narha, to Ezzara and disappeared traveling through different free cities learning to be a perfect maid for ladies of great Houses. No one ever suspected her, because if her old job taught her anything, it was the art of making people believe what she wanted.

Until she started working for Jaenara Rogare.

Ezzara knows that she reached the end of the tunnel path, because before she reaches the wall through which she can enter the room, there is a huge dragon fang embedded in the wall.

The light in the room does affect her eyesight a bit after spending so much time in the dark in the tunnel, but she can tell that the person waiting for her is not the queen; it is the woman who contacted her in Essos for this job.

"Do you have something for me?" The woman says embroidering a beautiful handkerchief in the colors of the House Velaryon sigil without even looking at her.

"A dragon making night visits”. At this information, Alarra looks up, intrigued, and nods for her to continue with the story. “The king visited Jaenara last night and was there for a long time, about twenty minutes. He tried to go unnoticed by going through one of the hidden passages but you know that the Red Keep has eyes and ears everywhere, my informant was able to see him”.

"I assume that your informant does not know your reasons for learning the details of Jaenara Rogare's life."

"Of course not. Nobody knows."

"Okay. Is there something else?" Alarra says going back to her embroidery.

"My informant also told me that the guards were commenting that Jaenara and the king were together in the training yard and that they seemed quite close”.

"We are aware of that. Thank you Ezzara, on the table is this week's payment."

Ezzara takes the small package with coins and leaves the room by the same passage through which she entered.

…..

_Elia walks through the corridors of the Red Keep as fast as her damaged leg allows, it has only been three days since the dinner with Aerys and although her leg feels a little better,_ _she has a slight limp that she thinks will stay with her for a long time._

_She is accompanied by two knights, a young man who must not be more than fifteen years old and Jaime Lannister._ _The young lion has been close to her since Rhaegar left, she believes that it was her husband who asked him to and although Aerys has done everything possible to keep her isolated from the outside, Jaime has managed to visit her and give her news of the war._

_Like now that he informed her of Rhaegar's arrival to command the army to fight on the Trident._

_As soon as she had this information, she left the children with the lady who began helping her after Ashara's departure for Dorne, and she went to the armory despite all of Jaime's protests that if Aerys knew she had left the room he would probably be upset._

_She is no longer afraid of Aerys. No anymore._

_Part of her decision to go is that she wants to talk to her uncle Lewyn before he leaves with Rhaegar._ _She knows Aerys only sends him into battle to leave her and the children even more unprotected at Kings Landing and Elia can't let him go without apologizing to him first. None of this would be happening if she hadn't married Rhaegar._

_Upon arriving at the armory she sees a large number of men taking their swords, shields, bows, arrows among other battle implements. When they recognize who she is, they bow their head when she passes by._

_Elia asks one of the men if he has seen her uncle and he tells her that he is at the end of the hall next to the room where combat strategies are planned._

_"Wait here" she says to both knights. They obey even though she can feel Jaime's eyes on her._

_When she finally sees her uncle, he is speaking to what appear to be other commanders of small groups of men. "Princess," he says a bit surprised as he looks in her direction and realizes that she is there._

_"Uncle, can I talk to you before you go?" He directs them to a small room that is empty. "I don't know how to look into your eyes without feeling that I am to blame for everything that is happening” she says dejectedly._

_“Wars are inevitable dear niece. I always knew the day would come when I would be asked to defend the kingdom. I took my vows knowing all that. I did it for you, for my sister, for Dorne”._

_She takes his hand and, looking around, making sure no one can hear, says "How much your lady must hate me”._

_His eyes get sad. “My lady knows that the day will come when I would have to leave. It is unavoidable”._

_"Don't talk like you're going to die!" She whispers in an angry voice._

_Before her uncle can respond, they feel someone's footsteps approach and she immediately knows who it is because her uncle squeezes her hand tightly and kisses her forehead before bowing his head. "Prince Rhaegar”._

_“Ser Lewyn. I hope I don't interrupt”. The man doesn't respond, he walks over to Rhaegar and says "The troops are ready to go to the Trident”._

_At that point Elia finally has the courage to turn around and face her husband for the first time in five months. The man she sees, although very similar to the one who left months ago, has subtle differences that she can notice. His eyes don't shine like they used to, instead he has dark circles, like he hasn't slept in days._ _When she looks at him closely, she also notices that his physical build has dropped a bit. But she does not know what she expected, he has been fucking Lyanna for months, surely he did not have time to train, only to fuck the she wolf so that she would give him his precious dragon._

_Gone was the kind man who suggested on their wedding night that they just talk to get to know each other and tell her they could consummate their marriage whenever they wanted, on their own terms, and then he cut off his leg to pretend they had had sex._ _They consummated it about a month after the marriage and at that moment Elia thought it was worth the wait, Rhaegar was right, they knew each other better and had a confidence that did not exist on the wedding day._

_At what point could he have changed so much? Or he has always been like this._ _Everyone says that madness runs through the veins of the Targaryens, perhaps her husband always had a small flame of madness inside him._ _It simply lacked the correct ingredients for that small flame to transform into an uncontrolled fire._

_"Elia”. She doesn't wait for the apologies that will surely come and replies "You were right, it was a long journey”. Her hands grasp the fabric of her dress tightly "But I can give you a summary of what happened in your absence if you wish”. She doesn't let him answer and walks over to the table near her and sits down crossing her legs._ _"Your father burned the Starks alive when they came to demand that their poor sister be returned according to them, the holy Lyanna was kidnapped by you and allegedly raped”. She laughs bitterly "Although the truth is that the whore gave herself up of her own free will. I would have told them that but your father were watching me at all times so it was impossible for me to reveal the truth to those poor men”. It feels good to be this new Elia who doesn't give a shit. “Your mother went to apologize to me the other day, when I asked her why, she said about your actions and all the pain I had to suffer. Of course I did not accept them; it is not her fault that her son is an asshole”._

_He had stayed at the entrance of the room but now, he closes the door and moves a little closer to her. “I'm sorry I wasn't the husband you deserved, the father my children deserved. I'm sorry that life has brought us together and I have caused you so much pain. I know that nothing I can say is going to change anything, but I…”_

_"Save what you have to say, Rhaegar, I'm not interested”. She gets up from the table and to his surprise, moves closer until he can feel her air on his lips._ _"Give me your hand" she says intoxicating him with her aroma, for months he only remembered her in dreams. Rhaegar takes her hand and then she begins to untie the tie that connects the skirt of her dress._ _When she finishes, the cloth falls to the ground and she is left with only her smallclothes. She brings her and Rhaegar’s hand to her thigh and that's when he realizes what she wants to show him. "Your father's latest act of cowardice”._

_He slides his hand over the huge wound that Elia has on her thigh. It looks like a wound from a few days ago because his hand is moistened with fresh blood._ _“He did not like that I opposed his opinions. He considered it an exemplary punishment. That way, everyone would know that not even one of the future queens of Kings Landing has the right to step on the Dragon”._

_Rhaegar kneels before her to inspect the wound. “I promise you that he will never hurt you again. Neither you nor the children. I'm not going to let my father's madness end it all”. He looks up "I promise”._

_"The way you promised to take care of me, love me, and protect me the day we got married?" Rhaegar gets up and grabs her face, but Elia tries with all her might to loosen his grip, when she realizes she can't do it, she bite the part of his hand that she can reach. He immediately lets go of her face and she takes the opportunity to pick up her skirt and fix her dress. "Don't touch me again! You fucking disgust me!"._

_"Elia wait" She runs to the door and manages to get out "Elia! Please I need to talk to you. Come back!"_

_"What!" She stops midway and realizes that the other knights are trying to pretend they are not paying attention to what is happening._

_Rhaegar also looks at the knights and begs her one last time "Come back"._

_Elia remembers the few times she thought of that word since Rhaegar left. There were days in the first few weeks when she imagined her husband regretting his actions and returning to Kings Landing begging for forgiveness._ _If Elia had managed to forgive him, it is a mystery to her, but she believes that perhaps in a couple of years they would have reached some kind of understanding. As the days passed and she realized he would never return, she knew that it was finally over._

_And with that any trace of love she felt for him._

_She knows this is the last time she will see Rhaegar before the battle is over, the men will depart tonight for the Trident._

_"You should have come back first”._

_Elia Martell turns around and continues on her way to the room where she is confined with her children._

_….._

_Rhaegar tries to walk as fast as possible through the hundreds of men he will lead into battle. He needs to find Jaime Lannister, talk to him in some way so he can inform him of his plan to get his family out of Kings Landing. Elia didn't want to listen to him._

_It had to be in private or some spy could overhear them and his father would somehow prevent her from leaving. If she's gone then he doesn't have any advantage over Dorne. Without her, he has no way of forcing them to fight for House Targaryen._

_"Ser Lewyn, have you seen Ser Jaime?"_

_"No prince. But I suppose he may be guarding the tower where the princess is on the king's orders”._

_"What tower?"_

_"Prince Rhaegar, we must go". Says one of the lower-ranking commanders who approaches them._

_“We can wait a little longer. I need to do something important”._

_“The men are ready to march. We're late and if we don't leave now, Robert will be there first. He will have a better strategy”._

_Rhaegar knows that he is right, but he cannot find a way out of his problem, if he leaves without telling Elia or Jaime they will have no way of knowing about the plan and he will not be able to send a raven from the Trident._

_Then the future king remembers that they will not be the only ones to march into battle and realizes that he will have the possibility to reverse the situation._

_A messenger._

_"Prepare the men Ser Vaemond, we will leave immediately”._

_….._

-Tarth-

Although her father has been a generous man and has allowed her to train with the sword, she can feel the disappointment in his eyes whenever they hear news from Westeros about the celebration of a marriage or the birth of an heir. She knows that he will not impose an engagement on her again after what happened with Humfrey Wagstaff, but she also believes that he still hopes that House Tarth does not die with her.

She would have liked to be the daughter her father deserves, but for some reason the gods decided otherwise.

Most of the clothes she's packing for the trip to Kings Landing are dresses, not that she wants them, but his father suggested that she could bring some and at least this time she wants to do something for him.

When her father told her they were going to the Tourney at Kings Landing for Princess Daenerys's birthday, Brienne felt excitement on one side and stress on the other. It is the first time that she will be in a tourney as important as this where knights from all sides will attend but it is also the first time that she has traveled outside of Tarth and is nervous about what people may think of her, the ugly and spinster daughter of Selwyn Tarth.

She always puts on a hard shell every time a hostile comment reaches her ears but inside something breaks in her, it does not matter that she is a skilled woman with a sword or that she has done everything on her part to absorb all the knowledge her father has taught her, how to be a good leader for her people, the only thing that matters is that her appearance is not what is expected of a lady of high birth.

Queen Lyanna disguised herself as a knight and participated in a tourney and no one has ever questioned her just because she may be a woman who can wield a sword but can also be as delicate as a rose. Even the first queens of Westeros, Rhaenys and Visenya Targaryen, were women who fought alongside their brother in conquest.

Dinner time is approaching; one of the last in Tarth before boarding for Kings Landing, so Brienne takes a deep breath before leaving her room and heading to the great hall.

In the distance she sees her father leaving his boardroom in the company of Lord Cameron; they are both very focused on a conversation, she would dare to say that even her father has that expression on his face that he only possesses when he tries to maintain his composure. She wonders what Lord Cameron could have said to make her father, who is one of the softest-tempered men she knows, have such a level of discomfort.

Her father looks up and at her, she tries to remember if lately she has done something that she needs to worry about because her father's eyes look at her uneasily, they seem to try to tell her something important, but it is only a second, he dismisses Lord Cameron and walks over to her.

"Do you have everything ready dear?" He touches his face with the back of his hand.

"Yes father”. She closes her eyes when she feels the warmth of his hand and the tenderness with which he caresses her.

“I was thinking and if it is not your wish to go to the tourney, I would be willing for you to stay in Evenfall”. She opens her eyes in surprise, just a day ago her father told her how important this trip was to them, she thinks he meant that this would be his last attempt to get a suitor for her, and now he changes his mind so suddenly.

"I don't understand father”.

He takes her face with both hands and stares at her "I've been thinking about that and I think it would be good if you stayed, you could take it as practice for when your father is too old and you should take your place as Evenstar”. He smiles but his smile doesn't reach his eyes.

These are the words that she expected from day one, since his father informed her that they should travel to the Tourney, she fantasized that something would happen and the tourney would be canceled or a storm would hit the seas so hard that the ships could not navigate. If he had told her this a couple of hours earlier, if she hadn't seen his worried eyes, she would have accepted the offer in the blink of an eye, but something tells her that there is a reason why her father doesn't want her to travel so suddenly and Brienne is sure it's no good.

“Thank you father but we have a responsibility as House Tarth. We will both go; I will not change my mind”. He seems surprised by her response and the conviction with which she speaks, but something also glows in his eyes, like the first time he saw her in the Evenfall Hall training yard disarm Ser Goodwin.

"Someday you will be better Evenstar than me or any of our ancestors” he whispers as he kisses her forehead, takes her hand and guides her into the great hall.

Dinner passes without another word about the trip, her father talks about the usual with her as well as asking her advice on some of the problems that afflict the inhabitants of the island. When she is about to get up to go to her room to rest, he stops her by putting his hand on hers.

"Before you go my bluemoon, I have something for you”. He gestures to the maid at the door and she returns with a beautiful box with a blue ribbon.

She receives it and puts it on the table, it is a large box so she assumes that what is inside is also large, although she cannot imagine her father's reason for a gift like this, her birthday is not until a couple of months.

"Thanks father. Can I open it?"

He laughs and she laughs too at her question. Her skilled hands disarm the ribbon and she lifts the box lid, what is inside takes her breath away. It is the most beautiful armor she has ever seen. "Father…"

"Look under the armor" With trembling hands she lifts the armor and underneath is a second box that without opening it knows immediately what it contains. Her eyes fill with tears but when she opens the lid she covers her mouth with her hand, stifling a sob.

"Dark Sister...but how..."

"Do you remember last month when the pirates reached the shores of Tarth?" She nods “When we managed to stop their attack, they withdrew, but we had left one of the ships severely damaged, so they just abandoned it. We decided to go and inspect. Among the various elements we found, there was this sword, when I saw it I recognized it immediately, I brought it to the castle and sent a raven to King Rhaegar informing him that we had in our possession the Valyrian steel sword belonging to Visenya Targaryen. My intention was to take it back to Kings Landing on our journey and return it to its owners, but the king's response was totally unexpected”. Brienne listens to her father but is totally absorbed by the beauty of the sword. “His answer was that it was not necessary for me to return it, that he only asked one thing, that I take care of it and use it with honor. But at that moment I knew immediately that I was not the one to wield that sword”. He catches Brienne's attention by holding her hand "What I said earlier in the hallway is true my daughter, you will be the best leader Tarth could have, it took me a while to accept that you are not as I would have expected, but you are exactly what our people need”. Now Brienne's sobs echo through the room. "I know that Tarth will be protected with you. That you will not let your people suffer or starve; you will be remembered as the best Lady of Evenfall”.

Brienne gets up from her seat and sits on her father's lap like when she was little, hugging him tightly. For the first time she feels accepted by the only person who really cares for her, no matter what other people think, the insults, humiliations, because now she is protected by the love of her father.

"Thank you" is all she can say but she knows that her father understands that it is more than just a simple word; it is a thank you for finally believing in me. He continues to cradle her tightly in his arms as he says "Although I believe that before protecting our people you have a tourney to win”.

She pulls away to look into his eyes "Tourney?"

“Selwyn Tarth may sign up for the tournament. It would be really gratifying to see the faces of the knights when they find out that the person who shot them down in combat is not the Evenstar, it is Brienne of Tarth, Lady of Evenfall”. Looking at the armor he gave her, says" The Blue Knight”.

Brienne lets out an unusual squeak and hugs him again. "My dear, I think it is time for you to test your new sword”.

Father and daughter spend much of the night practicing, her adrenaline is so high that she cannot think of sleeping, Dark Sister is so light that she hardly feel tired, so in the end they only stop because her father no longer has the same stamina than before and needs to rest for the meetings he has in the morning.

When Brienne is lying on her bed and some of her adrenaline has worn off, she suddenly thinks about the tourney, how there will be knights from everywhere even the great Arthur Dayne or Jaime Lannister and suddenly she sits on the bed with a mixture of fear and excitement before a smile covers her face and she lies back on her bed thinking that she will clash swords with the best opponents she has ever had.

….

Oberyn caresses the beautiful flowers they decided to plant years ago where the bodies of his sister, nephew, and niece are buried. He still remembers how he sat for days on the seashore waiting for them even when they had received Rhaegar's raven informing them of their terrible fate. His gaze was lost in the waves, as the days passed he began to see his sister sitting next to him but deep down he knew that it was only the creation of his confused mind and dehydrated body.

She was so beautiful just as he remembered her.

But it wasn't really her. Elia had changed a lot since her marriage to Rhaegar, he knew it from the way she wrote in her letters, but he confirmed it when he heard stories about her and her time at Kings Landing. She grew bolder; fighting for what she believed to be fair and for what she believed was worthwhile. Not that her sister never had been. He always knew that she was destined for great things. She was always a true daughter of Nymeria; it just took her time to discover what he saw in her since he was smart enough to recognize her qualities.

When she and the children arrived, the bodies were quite deteriorated despite the maester efforts to get them back in the best condition due to the number of days that had passed between her death at Kings Landing and the boat trip. Rhaegar in his letter had suggested that they be cremated and their ashes taken to Dorne, but the Prince of Dorne's reply was that if he did not arrive with full bodies, the seven kingdoms would be left without a king.

He needed to see his sister one last time even if it wasn't as they had planned in their letters.

When the moment he could finally see her came, the image of her shattered him. The truth is that he had not wanted to believe her death; he still harbored the slight hope that somehow it was not Elia who was coming on that ship.

All his hopes died when he finally got to see her. Her face was almost unrecognizable, her wavy black hair seemed unkempt and shorter than she liked, but when he began to inspect her body he found the birthmark they both shared, it was there on her thigh. Her entire body was full of scars, the maester did everything possible so that her injuries were not so shocking to the people who saw her but even with all his efforts he could almost feel all the suffering that happened before she died.

Since they were little they felt more connected than with their brother Doran, they were a perfect couple, he got them into trouble and Elia was the ingenious one who helped them out of the consequences. But that day when he rested his head on her chest despite the fact that his mind told him it was her, his heart was not convinced, he could not feel that connection. He was always more heart than reason, was what she used to say, and his refused to accept reality.

Over the years it became a little easier, having a place to visit and talk to them helped him come to terms with reality.

"Lately I find myself dreaming of you more and more" he whispers sitting cross-legged on the sand next to where his sister is. "I see you dancing under the bright moon at the Sunspear fountain... and you look beautiful Eli...like when you turned fifteen" He puts his hand under the sand as if reaching for her. "I came to say goodbye sister...after so many years I am finally going to fulfill the promise I made to you the day we buried you here”. His hand squeezes the sand tightly.

“When I'm done with them there will be nothing left but ashes; I will avenge every scar on your body, every tear, every cry”.

He gets up, walks to the two smaller graves that are next to his sister and smiles “Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about you. I have something specially prepared for your father”.

"Uncle Oberyn!" He turns around just in time to see little Elia running towards him. "Little sun!" he says hugging her tightly.

"Prince" He looks over the girl's shoulders and sees her mother in a deep purple dress, almost the same color as her eyes.

Oberyn drops Elia to the ground and watches her walk away to collect some precious stones that adorn the outline of the place. "Ashara...I think after we both bathe naked in the Sunspear fountain we can leave the formalities behind”.

"We were three years old." She arches an eyebrow.

“Three, twelve, twenty-nine, who's counting them. We still enjoy it”. He gives her a mischievous smile.

Ashara's face turns serious "When will you travel to Kings Landing?" They both walk and sit on the sand watching Elia pick up her stones "The ship will sail the day after tomorrow to be in time for the tourney”.

"Mmm”.

Oberyn bumps his shoulder against hers "What is it lady of Starfall?"

She turns to see him "Why did you now have the need to compete in tourneys? You've never been to one before”.

“Oh, you know me. I am a free and unpredictable spirit” He brings his face closer to hers “Perhaps it is time for you to know all my attributes my lady”.

She can't keep her composure and laughs alongside him. In addition to being a man known for his qualities with the spear, he is also known for being able to seduce even a blind snake with just his words.

"Just be careful, Elia would be very sad if something happened to you”.

"And her mother?"

After thinking for a few seconds she says "We have been friends for years, of course I would be sad”.

He cocks his head to the side "How sad”. He whispers.

"Oberyn"

"Ashara" the prince strokes the black hair of the woman.

"I wonder if this always works for you"

"Most of the time, but never with the person I want”.

They are both interrupted by Elia, who comes running to show them the stones she found to take to the fountain they have in Starfall, where she has fish of all colors. "They are beautiful darling but we must go now" says Ashara getting up.

"But I didn't manage to tell Uncle Oberyn about my new fish”. Elia complains.

“My little ray of sunshine, Uncle Oberyn wants to hear all about that new fish. Why don't you come to Sunspear to spend the afternoon?”

"Yeeees!” The girl looks at her mother with pleading eyes, a look she cannot resist.

"Only the afternoon”.

"Thank you mommy" her little arms surround her and then she takes Oberyn's hand to walk next to him and tell him how she acquired her new fish, Star.

Ashara walks behind them, looking one last time at Elia's grave and asking her to protect her brother.

Her instinct tells her that after this trip nothing will ever be the same.


	8. Red Death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The longest chapter so far I actually had to split it in two...so in chapter 9 you will finally find out what happened in Kings Landing the day Elia and the kids died...I think it will be Interesting for you to know who it was because obviously that character is in the narrative of the story.
> 
> The sad thing...you will have to wait two weeks to find out...college is killing me...I want to take the time to edit the chapter in the best possible way so that you understand it. 
> 
> I hope you like the chapter. 
> 
> See you in two weeks :)

Jaenara continues to wander through the maze of rose bushes in the garden when she sees Tywin Lannister coming with Ser Jonathan Donniger and Ser Oswell Whent walking behind him. They come at a hurried pace in her direction.

Since she has nowhere else to escape, she has no choice but to face him.

"My lady, I was wondering if I could accompany you on your walk”.

"Of course my lord”.

Tywin looks at the knights and says, “Keep your distance from us. We will talk about business”.

"Of course my lord”. Says the young knight while Oswell simply nods. That man rarely shows emotion other than disinterest in everything.

"Ihrra, Ezzara, walk alongside the knights”.

Tywin takes her arm to walk and although it seems like a kind gesture, she knows that deep down it is because he wants to talk as close to her as possible.

“I don't know whether to be flattered or disturbed. Just a few days ago I didn't think about getting married and now I have two proposals”.

“Not everything is so bad my lady. You have to see an opportunity in any situation”. He says confidently.

"Enlighten me".

"Accept Rhaegar's proposal”.

She stops and says out loud "What!" he pulls her arm without looking at her so she can continue walking calmly.

“Our _business_ will be finished within a year. That marriage will not take place and you will still own half of the Red Keep, which is good for us”. She assumes that by business she means rebellion.

“You speak as if I agree to join this business. I have not accepted anything”.

"It is interesting what one can discover only by finding the right person”.

"And what did you discover?" Tywin's words freeze her. Perhaps his confidence that she will accept has to do with knowing her true identity in some way. If so, he will have her in his hands.

“Lysandro Rogare has capital that far exceeds what Rhaegar is asking for. It's not really a big loan for him, and has loaned even higher gold figures without such a contract. As I said before, he had no need to send his daughter, his only heir, to Kings Landing…with a crew of so many men. It turns out that some of those men like to go to brothels”. She thinks she knows where the conversation is going and although she feels calmer now, she doesn't like Tywin knowing anything about her plan. "If you put a couple of coins in the hands of someone who maybe earns one a year, they would be able to even sell their children”. Jaenara thinks of Ghael and knows how true that phrase is.

"It's difficult to find trustworthy people these days, after all you are the hand of the king and we already know that you are also capable of selling your children”.

“If you say it for Cersei, believe me my lady, she was the one who had the idea of marrying Robert Baratheon. My daughter has my intelligence; it is a pity that she is a woman. I am sure that if Jaime had that personality things would be… different”.

_House Lannister would surely be the one that would occupy the Iron Throne._

"Are you going to tell me what came out of those men's mouths?"

He begins to stop and takes a flower from one of the rose bushes; she notices that from the corner of his eye he is observing the position of the knights and her ladies. "Your father told them they would be staying at Kings Landing for several months”. He plays with the rose in his hands and smiles as if they are talking about something totally different. "In the coming months other smaller ships will arrive, men will come in them posing as merchants, but they are men who work for the Rogare family and know the mines”. He cuts the stem of the rose long enough to remove the larger thorns and with his hand he pulls Jaenara's hair behind her ear to place it there. “I think you never intended that Rhaegar could pay the debt. I think these men are hiding here to sabotage gold production. I still can't understand why, but trust me my lady, I'll find out”. He whispers all of this in her ear while pretending to be fixing the rose.

"That makes us both with a common goal, how would it benefit me to have an alliance with you? I can get what I want simply by following this plan, without having to marry you or Rhaegar”.

"Of course you can, there's no question" He takes her by the arm so they can walk again "But if you're not in our _business_ then you're not on our side”.

"Do you mean that the _investors in the business_ would fight the Rogare family?"

He nods his head “I have great esteem for you, Lady Jaenara, I think you are an intelligent woman but that does not change anything, if you are not with us then you are against us”.

Oberyn would fight his own sister. In addition to House Lannister, Dorne must have other alliances. So far, Jaenara knows absolutely nothing about this rebellion or how big it can be.

"Even if I don't interfere with your plans?"

“Even if you don't interfere, things will be difficult, my lady. No one remains neutral forever, you will have to choose a side at some point and it could be the wrong House. It is a risk that my investors are not willing to take”.

Jaenara would not choose the side of the Targaryens but Tywin is right, they have no way of knowing that, alliances are fragile, especially in Westeros, and sometimes if you negotiate enough you could even ally yourself with an enemy if they can give you something you want.

"So what would be the point of accepting Rhaegar's proposal, if you want a solid alliance from me, it should be with you”.

"Not if you secretly marry me first”. He stops them again and gestures for the knights to come closer but before they arrive he says to her "The deadline is still in effect, I will wait until tomorrow, if you do not wear the ring, I will assume that you decided to be neutral, although I hope your decision is different”. When the men are close, he takes her hand and kisses her knuckles with his cold, wrinkled lips and Jaenara can't help but think about how it would feel to have to kiss them in a possible ceremony. Just imagining it makes her stomach turn.

"Good afternoon Lord Tywin. For you too Ser Oswell and Ser Jonathan”. Oswell barely looks at her but Ser Jonathan kindly bids her farewell, although she sees that he is looking at the rose in her hair.

When he's gotten far enough away, she takes the rose from her hair and squeezes it tightly with her hand feeling a pair of thorns break through her skin. But it is a pain that she wishes, that helps her escape her thoughts.

It is worth more sacrifice on her part. Wasn't it enough just to take her children from her?

…..

"I know you are there"

Dany comes out of hiding behind a fig bush and walks nervously to Rhaegar who is lying on the cushions in his greenhouse. “I’m sorry. I'm not spying, I promise, I just… I saw you angry”.

Rhaegar leans on his arms to look at his sister, who is with her hands clasped in front of her and staring at the floor. He can't be mad at her. "Come here," he says in a soft, sweet voice.

The little girl's eyes light up and she runs into her brother's arms as they both lie down. She places her head on his chest and they are silent for a few moments just staring at the ceiling.

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

The king watches her carefully; sometimes Dany seems to be more mature and intelligent than any other girl of ten years. "It's…complicated”.

“I promise to keep the secret. You know I'm good at keeping secrets”.

"Yes, I know" he flicks her nose with his fingers making her laugh. “We have…money problems in the crown. You know that's why Lady Jaenara came here”. She nods “Well, she....it has been difficult to come to terms with her and I'm afraid we won't”.

“Why is it difficult?…Can I help you?…Maybe I can marry someone. That could help us, right?”.

"Who told you that?" He asks the curious.

"Lady Alarra said that if I marry a great lord that could help us"

“Lady Alarra should think first of marrying herself, although I doubt anyone will tolerate such a woman. She will no longer be your lady-in-waiting Dany, I have never liked her, I only tolerate her because she is friends with Lyanna but this exceeded my limit”.

"If you do, Aunt Lyanna will be mad at me”. She says worried.

“Of course not, sweetie. Also, I won't kick her out; I'll let her continue as Lyanna's lady-in-waiting if she wishes”. He tries to calm down so as not to scare his sister but before the end of the day he and Alarra will have a conversation. “And about our economic problems. Do not worry about it. I'll figure it out somehow, but you're not marrying anyone at least not for now. When you do, it will be because you want it, not out of duty”.

She puts her ear back to his heart "Rhaegar....What was aunt Elia like?" His hand that was stroking her hair stops and the young Targaryen bites her lip nervously "Sorry, I won't mention her again”.

"She had wavy black hair.....when she slept it seemed like a black sun adorned her face”. He remembers her as if it were only moments ago that he last saw her "She was.....tall like Lady Jaenara and had brown eyes ... that always glowed”. Now that Rhaegar thinks about it, Jaenara and Elia have a certain resemblance in their features. "Her skin was dark....but beautiful, even when she had been living in Dragonstone for months; it looked like she had bathed in the Dorne sun”. Rhaegar woke up one day to the pressure of her hand on his and found she was looking at their joined hands. From that day on, every time they slept together, he pretended to be asleep when he felt her doing that. He thought that maybe if he woke up she would stop.

"Everybody says you fell in love with Aunt Lyanna and that's why you left her....is that true?"

He sighs "That ... is complicated”.

"Why?"

“You are too young to understand Dany”.

"Do you love someone or you don’t ... I don't know why everything for you adults is complicated”.

They are both silent. Dany is right, it's always difficult to talk about the past when you know you made so many mistakes. “I wasn't in love with your aunt Lyanna, Dany…I don't know if…I really don't know if I am even now after so many years. I love her but I don't feel the same as when I was with your aunt Elia”. Now that he's started talking, he feels like he can't stop, he needs someone to hear him talk about her, at least once. “I hurt her a lot, but I kept hoping that over the years we would at least speak again, even though I knew she would not forgive me, I was satisfied to see her, just that. But life was unfair to them and fair to me. Now I will never see them again”.

"We can go to Dorne Rhaegar...to see her, Rhaenys and Aegon"

“No Dany…we can't. I vowed never to return to those lands and release Dorne from all responsibility with the Crown”.

“But I thought Dorne is part of the seven kingdoms. That's what the maester told me in a class”.

"It is, on the maps, but I am not their king and they have no obligations to us”.

"What if I send them a letter? ... Maybe if I tell them how much you miss them, maybe they will let you go there”. She says with a gaze lost as if she is already thinking about the words she is going to write.

“The world doesn't work like that Dany but thanks for offering it… and for listening to me. You promise to keep the secret, right?”

"I promise”. She kisses his cheek and both brothers hug.

“If Lady Alarra will no longer be my lady-in-waiting, do you think Lady Jaenara would want to be?”

"Lady Jaenara? Honey, she can't be your lady-in-waiting”.

"Why not?"

“Because she works in her family's business, it's like Jon, that one day will take my place. In her case, she will take her father's place in the Bank”. She seems disappointed.

"Well, can I at least spend time with her while she's here?"

“I'm afraid she will be leaving soon Dany. Our business is not prospering so for her there is nothing else to do here”.

"How soon?"

Rhaegar hates herself for having to break the news to her, she seems to have really liked Rogare's heiress "Tomorrow Dany".

She gets up so fast it scares Rhaegar "Tomorrow!".

"I already told you the-."

"Can't you ask her to stay a couple more days? Please brother”. Most of the time he can't refuse anything she asks of him, but this time there is nothing he can do.

"Dany".

"Is it because of her that you were angry?".

"Yes ... and no, I think we were both angry and said hurtful words to each other”. Once he left the meeting and his anger subsided, he thought better of his proposal and understood why she was so upset with him. What he still does not understand, and what led him to his greenhouse, is how she was able to choose words so similar to the ones Elia said to him before leaving for the trident.

"Then you can go and apologize and everything will be fine”.

“I don't think an apology will fix everything, honey. Especially when it comes to such sensitive issues”.

“I think brother, that you are very stubborn. Repeat with me. I Rhaegar Targaryen”.

He laughs but plays the game "I Rhaegar Targaryen”.

"I apologize to you Lady Jaenara, for being a stubborn pig's head”.

"So a pig's head..." He begins to tickle his sister and her squeals of joy echo off the greenhouse walls. When both of them run out of breath from laughing so much he says he will try to apologize to Jaenara even though he doesn't promise anything.

Perhaps his sister is right and life is not the complicated one, but it is he who complicates it.

…..

Jaenara recognizes the knocks on the door before opening it, so now she's ready. She just opens it a bit and tells Rhaegar to leave before she really gets mad and shoots an arrow in his forehead.

"I’m sorry” He says before she can close the door in his face. "I just want to apologize”.

"I believe that there is nothing more to talk between us, your grace, since neither of us gives in, tomorrow I will begin my return to Essos”.

"No!...I mean..." Rhaegar exhales "May I come in?"

After a second, she steps away from the door to let him into the room. She does it not only because she feels that Rhaegar is coming to say something that will benefit her but also because it is suspicious for someone who passes by outside to see the king at this hour with her. The situation could be misinterpreted and is what she needs the least at this time.

Inside, she gestures for both of them to sit in the big armchair facing the window and she looks at him, waiting for Rhaegar to say what he has to say.

"Last night I was desperate when I got out of here and I guess that same desperation made me think about that...terrible proposal”. He laughs but it is that laugh when you feel overwhelmed by a situation that you cannot control and the point comes where you simply resign yourself. His gaze is lost somewhere on the brown carpet. "Do you know the first thing I do in the morning?" She shakes her head "I always walk down the same hall.....the last one I saw Rhaenys walk”.

"Rhaenys was your oldest daughter, right?" It feels strange to talk about your daughter as if she were a complete stranger, but Jaenara Rogare is supposed to have never met Rhaenys Targaryen.

"Yes ..." He looks up and she can see the vulnerability in his eyes. "She had a cat...she named him Balerion after Aegon Targaryen's dragon, _Balerion the Black Dread_ , sometimes she would ask me to tell her stories about dragons before she went to sleep....she loved that story”. Jaenara remembers that day, Rhaegar arrived with a little black kitten and her daughter's eyes lit up when she saw him, they were inseparable. "Balerion still roams the Red Keep, but he doesn't let anyone get near him, he's especially hostile to me, I think he blames me for her death as well”. She doesn't know what hurts her more, having to pretend that nothing he says is known to her or that at this moment her heart feels some compassion for him “The last time I saw Aegon was with Elia in the garden…. she left her room little the last months before the rebellion…. whenever she did, it was because Rhaenys asked her to play hide and seek in the garden”.

"She was sick?".

“After Aegon was born she was a bit weak for a while. But I think in the last few months she just didn't want to see me”.

"I imagine that because of what happened in the tourney” How she managed to keep the conversation going up to this point is a real mystery.

Rhaegar nods. “But even before that. I became cold, distant. When the maester gave us the news that Elia was expecting another child… at that moment I had already realized the inevitable”.

"That she couldn't give him more children, your grace?"

"No. That I was in love with her”. _In love_ is a word that she never heard her husband say. Perhaps Rhaegar is lying to appear more vulnerable.

"You make it sound like it's a bad thing”.

“When all your life you firmly believe in something it is difficult to change it. I loved Elia. After the birth of Rhaenys, I wanted to put the prophecy aside. I thought that the three heads of the dragon would be born from us, but once I was alone with the master he warned me that it was not recommended that Elia get pregnant again, even Aegon's pregnancy would be difficult”. She did not know this information, he never told her that the maester spoke to him in private. Anyway, nothing would have changed.

_If you loved me, was it so easy to leave me?_

He seems embarrassed "I started having dreams...nightmares, which I thought were premonitory dreams of what should happen”. Jaenara hadn't noticed it before, but he has the fist of his right hand clenched so tightly that he bleeds "But the nightmares were just the creation of my troubled mind....and I started to believe the words again...At that time I lost everything".

“Decisions have consequences, sometimes bad, sometimes good, but you have to accept them. It's what you chose”. Although when Jaenara says this, she realizes that nothing that happened was due to any of her decisions. Even her marriage to Rhaegar wasn't her idea.

“If you could turn back time your grace. Do you think you would make different decisions?” Jaenara still can't decipher this Rhaegar in front of her.

“No, I'm afraid not, my lady. If time turned back, I would be the same man. The same man who believed that the realm would need his children to prosper. Now I know the truth”.

"And what is that truth?"

"What matters is the present...not yesterday or tomorrow.....the only one who needs his children is me...and not to be saviors of anything...but to love them, protect them, teach them not to commit the same mistakes. I try to be a good father to Jon, not pressure him, make him happy; but I'm afraid our relationship has never been close, I just can't get to him”.

Jaenara takes a deep breath, how are you supposed to have a conversation about children with a man who practically murdered yours, maybe not directly but his actions led to their death. "I think I lack experience in that field since I don't have children, your grace".

"Rhaegar”.

"Mmm". She says puzzled.

“You can call me Rhaegar… I would feel more comfortable if you did; and regarding your lack of experience, I don't think so, I have seen you with your assistant, Ghael. You are…different with him….What I said in the morning that you were arrogant and hungry for power… well its true”. He has a small smile "But you are not someone who wants to make others feel inferior...I only said that because of how upset I was but the truth is that seeing you with him...it shows that you care about him and that it's more than just an assistant”.

“Ghael came to our home under difficult circumstances. He is a good boy but also very intelligent...don't be fooled by his innocent face. I think you guys would get along, he really knows a lot about dragons”.

"You could ask him if he would like to go to the library here at Red Keep, I think there are some books he might like”.

"He would love it”. They are each on the opposite corner of the couch but unlike the beginning of the conversation, they are both visibly more relaxed and that makes Jaenara remember the first months of their marriage when they spent hours talking. That thought annoys her and she hates him for making her remember that. "Your hand bleeds Rhaegar...I'll go get... something”. She gets up quickly and looks for some kind of cloth to put in his hand.

With shaking hands, she rummages through her drawers and finds a silk scarf that will serve her perfectly to stop the bleeding. She walks over to Rhaegar and sits next to him to bandage his hand. The moment seems even more intimate and she feels stupid for thinking about this to get out of the previous situation.

“Jaenara Belaerys. When your father told me in his letter that your name was Jaenara I thought of her but now that I know you a little I think you look quite the same”. He says in a soft tone as she continues to adjust the bandage.

She doesn't remember Rhaegar ever meeting someone by that name or hearing it before "Who is she?"

"She was a dragon rider from old Valyria; she traveled on her dragon Terrax for three years to Sothoryos”.

"I have heard of Sothoryos, it is a very hostile land”.

"She was a brave warrior”.

A smirk tugged at her lips. "And am I a brave warrior for you Rhaegar?"

"I don't know..." Rhaegar's hand that Jaenara was bandaging now rests near her leg and Rhaegar seems to have leaned closer to her. "I think I was referring to her being unpredictable like a storm....She explored Sothoryos for three years...only with her dragon....Do you know what else they say about her?"

"What do they say?" She whispers.

"That she was…." Something passes Rhaegar's eyes, his posture changes and he seems nervous. "She was a very intelligent woman...like you, my lady”. He gets up from the couch and says “Regarding the contract, forget about the marriage…it was a hasty and wrong decision….But I ask you to reconsider about owning all the Red Keep”.

“It's not me who makes the decisions, Rhaegar. It seems to me that you forget that my father is still in charge of the Rogare Bank”. Jaenara feels a bit taken aback by his attitude because when she stands up and walks towards him, Rhaegar seems to take a step back as if he is avoiding her. “I can send my father a letter asking if he can reconsider, but it's the only thing I can do. It all depends on him “.

"Thank you my lady. I will wait for the answer." He walks quickly towards the door "See you tomorrow Lady Jaenara, have a good night”.

"The same for you, your grace”.

When Rhaegar has left the room, she walks to where she has her dragon egg "Terrax", she says taking it in her hands "Maybe I'll call you that from now on", this time she sits on the couch with the egg "Maybe calling you like that gives us good luck”.

The whole conversation with Rhaegar left her with a bittersweet taste. She will not write such a letter to her father, Lysandro has nothing to do with the decisions she makes in relation to Kings Landing, her father gave her full control of any financial operations related to Westeros.

If what she discussed with Tywin is true, then Rhaegar won't even complete a couple of months on the throne and with that, she would become the owner of half of the Red Keep regardless of the new king, as the contract explicitly says the King of the Seven Kingdoms, it doesn't say Rhaegar Targaryen's name anywhere, but she knew he would focus more on the last clause than on reading carefully.

As she caresses the beautiful shell of the fossilized egg, she thinks about the inevitable. Whatever the outcome of this story, her story, she will see her brothers and possibly her nieces and nephews again.

But beyond that she thinks that this entire rebellion is based on her death, although her children are important to her brothers, if they had managed to know that she was alive they would not have planned this kind of revenge against Rhaegar. Her brother would have simply been happy with her in Dorne even if that had been impossible, she would still have been Rhaegar's wife and unless he had annulled their marriage, which is highly unlikely, Elia would have had to stay at Kings Landing probably being one of Rhaegar's two wives and continues to fulfill her duty as Queen of the seven kingdoms.

Her brothers mourned her, buried her, and probably remember her lovingly every day.

Because she is dead to them.

A war always brings death, if that death is for Oberyn or Doran, she could not bear it.

So she knows what to do.

She will do whatever it takes to protect them.

…..

Rhaegar returns to his room with more questions than answers. He doesn't understand how he hadn't noticed it before, but up close, Jaenara Rogare reminds him a lot of Elia. Perhaps because of the two times their faces have been close, the previous one he burned with rage and did not stop to observe her features but now that they were both conversing in a relaxed manner, she, for a moment, seemed so similar to Elia.

The other thought that takes away what little peace he has left in his mind is because he got too close to her. They were talking about Jaenara Balaerys and he suddenly felt lost in her eyes, the blue of them clouding his mind and they attracted him more and more.

Rhaegar didn't feel like this for many years and that confuses him.

His room is around the corridor but before he gets there he sees some maids coming out with wine, fruits, cheeses and meats.

"Your grace". They say together, bowing and going on their way.

Upon entering his rooms he sees his wife sitting on his bed waiting for him.

"You're late". She says as he closes the door.

"I’m sorry, I didn't know you would be here or I would have tried to finish sooner." Rhaegar knows something is wrong when he approaches to kiss her and she dodges him.

"Now do I need to make an appointment to see you, your grace?"

"Lyanna ... you know I don't mean that”.

She gets up furious from the bed "Where were you?"

"I was with Jaenara Rogare, trying to get her to reconsider her decision."

"And?"

“She said that she would send a letter to her father explaining the situation. It’s the most she can do”.

"And you believed her”. Her eyes look at him. “Rhaegar, her father, is thinking of retiring. This trip is a kind of test for her. She has full access to all accounts related to Kings Landing. She has been making decisions at the bank for years”.

He knows that Lyanna spies on Jaenara constantly, that's why every time he goes to her room; he goes through a passage that has a direct exit to that corridor. But her words tell him that she has more than just guards spying on her, she has a spy close to Jaenara. "And how do you know that?"

"I told you I was spying on her”.

"Who".

"Ezzara, her lady-in-waiting”.

"And you accuse me of naivety”. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Do you really think that a woman like her is not going to realize that her lady is a spy?"

"A woman like her?....And what is she like, Rhaegar?....You seem to know her better than everyone". Lyanna's eyes are accusatory and he feels guilty about the thoughts he had before reaching the room.

“I mean that she grew up under the tutelage of Lysandro Rogare. The same man my father tried to ask for gold in the past and refused. My father did not take this situation well and sent a ship with a hundred mercenaries that he hired to threaten him. A month passed and my father had no response until the same ship returned but did not approach the port. People only saw how from inside the ship someone threw _something_ into the sea. The wave’s hours later brought _that something_ to the shore; they were the heads of the hundred mercenaries. My father was furious and blamed the mercenaries that they had been the useless ones unable to get the job done, but he never tried to do business with Essos again. Lysandro Rogare is known to be a good man but that does not mean that he is weak or naive, on the contrary, it is for this very reason that few have dared to challenge him. He must have raised his daughter to be just as ruthless”. His wife seems to understand his message because some of the anger in her eyes has dissipated.

She takes his hand and feels the bandage "What happened to you?"

"I cut myself...training with Arthur”. Rhaegar doesn't want to fight her anymore; at least that's why he thinks he's lying to her.

She looks at his hand but doesn't pay much attention to it and then hugs him and buries her face in his chest. "And what are we going to do then?"

"Wait. It doesn't matter who makes the decisions, what matters are that if she gave me more time it is because she is going to consider it or she would have refused immediately”. Her hands caress his back from neck to hips.

"Enough talking about Jaenara Rogare”. Her lips brush his in a sweet kiss but with a promise behind. "I think we've had little time for ourselves lately...and since I'm here…" she says over his lips, pressing her body against his. Rhaegar can feel the curves of her body, her breasts begging for release from her dress. "Fuck me”. She whispers in his ear as she takes his butt in her hands and push their bodies closer.

They have always understood each other well in every way, despite the difficult start they had over the years, their relationship has solidified. What he said to Dany in the morning is true, he is not sure if he is in love with her in the same way that she is in love with him, but he does love her and want her.

That is why he does not understand why at this moment he does not do it.

"Lyanna…." She is passionately kissing and stroking him in a way that she knows he adores, but his body is still unresponsive.

"What?" She bites his lower lip, nibbling a bit "Do you want something special husband?..." She undoes the first buttons of her dress leaving her breasts bare "Maybe my breasts on your cock...pumping....until I took you in my mouth”. She kneels in front of Rhaegar and he tries to focus on the glorious image of her in front of him, closes his eyes and thinks of all the previous times they have been together, overflowing with passion for each other but when he opens them and looks down at her to tangle his hand in her hair, he does not see Lyanna's face but Jaenara's, her blue eyes pierced his gaze the same way they did a few minutes ago in her room. He feels so guilty that he doesn't think he's capable of making love to her right now. He is about to make up an excuse when there is a knock on the door.

"Do not open…"

"It may be important”. He waits for her to fix the dress and opens the door. On the other side is Arthur, and he couldn't be more grateful to him right now.

"Sorry to bother you at this time Rhaegar, but I need to talk to you. It's urgent”. Arthur rarely comes to the bedroom at this time, the only times he does is because it's really life or death.

The king nods and turns to say goodbye to Lyanna. “Don't worry, Rhaegar. If he has come at this time it must be a topic that cannot wait”. She kisses his cheek.

When her husband is gone, Lyanna thinks about Rhaegar's injury and how she's sure she saw that silk scarf on Jaenara Rogare.

She won't let Rhaegar turn her into an Elia Martell. She is not going to let Jaenara Rogare get in the way of her marriage.

…..

"Tell me it's not problems you want to talk about”. Rhaegar believes that they are walking towards the White Sword Tower, but is surprised to see that they pass beyond. They walk towards the Dungeon.

"I'd like to say no to you, but I'm afraid we're in serious trouble”.

Rhaegar runs his hands over his frustrated face. "Problems follow me everywhere, even to my room”.

"Did something happen with Lyanna?" He asks opening the tower door and saluting the guards.

"Yeah but....I don't want to talk about it....I don't even understand what happened”. Rhaegar does not use the lower levels of the dungeons below the tower, only the tower and the first two floors of the dungeons. He came down to the fourth level once since he ascended the throne and decided he would never go there again. Maegor built it to torture prisoners and it can be seen in every corner of that floor.

Arthur leads him to a small cell on the second floor that has no windows, but the torches make it easy to see. Once inside, he sees that Oswell is also there along with one of the floor guards, guarding a young boy no more than eleven years old who seems scared and confused by what is happening.

"What's wrong Arthur, why is this kid here?"

“Tell him what you told us”. Oswell says, giving the boy a little blow to the head.

He looks at Rhaegar even more scared "Please your grace don't kill me...I...didn't know...She didn't tell me…”

"Tell me your name first”. He tries to speak quietly so as not to scare him even more.

"Argos, your grace".

"Argos...well...now tell me what the knights are talking about...why they have you here”.

"I…." His lips tremble and his eyes are fixed on the ground. "She told me…"

"For the love of the seven, speak up!"

"Oswell!" Arthur says indignantly gesturing for him to wait outside. Oswell Whent stops next to Arthur and spits on his shoes before exiting. If it were anyone else, it would be grossly disrespectful, but they've known Oswell for so many years that they understand his temperament.

"I work for a merchant, I run his errands”. Rhaegar gestures for him to continue speaking "Mr. Edwyn makes all kinds of concoctions, he's very popular”. The boy seems less scared now that Oswell is gone, although Rhaegar himself must admit that when they were younger and didn't know each other, he was a bit scared by his attitudes. “Last week a woman came to the stall to buy, she seemed like a woman with coins so my lord offered her his best concoctions but she was looking for something else. He told her to come the next day and he showed her what she was looking for”.

"Do you know the name of the woman?"

"No, your grace, she was very covered, I did not see her well”.

"Well what was she looking for?" Rhaegar is impatient and unsure where this conversation is going, but concoction merchants generally have that facade for selling all kinds of poisons or potions, as they call it. They are not trusted men.

"This". Arthur has in his hand a small jar with an insect inside, it looks like a butterfly by its colors but it is not one that he has seen in Kings Landing or in other places of the seven kingdoms he has visited. Rhaegar takes it and examines it closely.

"And what is this little guy?"

“It is an insect that comes from the Basilisk Islands, a group of islands off the northwest coast of Sothoryos, in the Summer Sea, and although it appears harmless, it transmits the disease that killed much of the population in the past”.

Rhaegar looks at him suspiciously "You mean...the Red Death?"

Arthur nods. "We found this child inside the Red Keep with this jar”.

"And what did they tell you to do with it?"

"She paid me 3 golden dragons coins to come here and leave it in a room" The boy looks up "But I did not know that it brought the Red Death, your grace, I swear!".

"But you know your lord works with this kind of crap”.

"Yes...I thought it was not good but not something like that...I also needed the coins”. He says embarrassed.

“The insect dies once it bites a victim; it only serves to transmit the disease. The person who contacted him was very smart. She knew the insect would only bite the person she needed once and after that there would be no trace of anything”. Arthur points out.

Rhaegar looks at the boy, he can't blame him for what happened, but he can't let him go like this either. "You will come three times a week to help in the stables”.

"Yes, your grace...I'm very good with horses, I promise I'll do a very good job”.

"And you will not work with the merchant again, if he objects you can talk to Arthur, he will talk to him. And don't worry; I'll pay you for your work”.

The child's eyes light up "Thank you, your grace!...Thank you!"

“Yeah, You’re welcome….now go home. I'll see one of the knights accompany you”.

Minutes later, only Arthur and Rhaegar remain in the cell. "What else could you find out when you questioned him? Do you know what woman he's talking about and what room he was supposed to leave the insect in?" It's amazing how something so small can cause so much damage. The red death is one of the worst known diseases. You die bleeding from every body orifice, screaming in pain and your skin shredding like wet parchment.

Arthur takes a deep breath "he couldn't say much about the woman, she was always covered, trying to hide her identity but I have an idea who it may be, although I can't confirm it”. Rhaegar stops looking look at the bottle with the insect and looks to his old friend. "He described the woman's eyes as purple, and unless Dany went to buy that, there is only one other woman living in the Red Keep who owns those eyes”.

"Alarra Velaryon"

“It makes sense; she knows well the Red Keep, could give him access to the castle and indicate where to walk through the corridors so that they do not see him. But there is more”.

Rhaegar bangs his head against the wall staring at the ceiling. "I guess what you're going to tell me now is which room she told him to leave this in”. All he can think of is all the times he spent with Dany. Rhaegar never agreed that she was her lady-in-waiting, he didn't trust her but Lyanna convinced him.

"We grabbed it just before opening the door to Jaenara Rogare's room”.

That immediately catches his attention "Jaenara?...why would Alarra want to hurt Jaenara”. Aside from the incident with Dany where Jaenara clearly pretended she twisted her foot to run away with her sister, she doesn't think Alarra has any reason to do something like this.

“I don't know…. there are many options, for example, it may have been paid for by someone else. Without being one hundred percent sure that it is her, we cannot question her”. Arthur has always been good at reading his emotions; they have been friends for years. Except the year after Elia died, where they hardly spoke. "I think you should inform Jaenara what happened”.

"Yes, she should know ... but I would prefer you to inform her".

Arthur leans forward with his elbows on his leg and arches an eyebrow. "And why is that?".

"Remember when I told you there was nothing to worry about”. His friend nods resigned "Maybe now there is something”.

"And what do you plan to do about it?".

"Stay as far away as possible….try not to be alone with her...cover my eyes every time I see her...I don't know Arthur..." Rhaegar focuses his gaze towards the ceiling. “The first day she came to Kings Landing when she walked into the great hall with Jaime, there was something about her that seemed familiar to me, but once she came over and started talking I forgot”. Rhaegar turns his head and watches as the insect flies into the jar. "But today we were talking and we got closer....up close she looked so similar to Elia, not just her features, the way she spoke to me, the way she looked at me”.

"Yes, it is true, they look alike but I think it is because of their mother, she is Rhoynar right?....Our lineage is Rhoynar after Nymeria landed in Dorne”.

“Yeah…or maybe it's just that I miss her and hold on to whatever reminds me of her. Dany asked me about Elia today, I think that made me nostalgic”. He gets up from his seat "Anyway, I think I should get away from Jaenara, see her only when strictly necessary”.

"Maybe I have information to help you with that”. Rhaegar looks at him curiously as Arthur closes the cell door and hands the jar to the guard with instructions to burn it as soon as possible "Oswell and Jonathan escorted Tywin today to talk to her in the garden”.

"He told me that he would talk to her about the contract...what's up with that?"

"They commented that they looked close, even that Tywin put a rose in her hair”.

"Do you think Tywin is courting her?"

“It is a possibility…he is an intelligent man, he knows that the Rogare family is important and powerful. In the position House Lannister now holds, he would benefit from a marriage to her”.

“But she wouldn't benefit from him… Jaenara may be many things but she is not stupid. She would not allow a man like Tywin to take over what it took Lysandro Rogare so many years to win”.

"No”. They both walk towards the White Sword Tower " But you already know that by negotiating many things can be gained, he can make her an interesting offer".

Tywin Lannister supported Rhaegar in Robert's rebellion only when he realized he was going to win. He's always been cautious of him, he let him be his hand because his father owed him millions and it was the fastest way to pay off the debt and Tywin is really very good at the job he does.

But Rhaegar knows that if opportunity favors him, he could betray him.

"Tell one of your men to watch Tywin, I want to know who enters and leaves the Tower of the hand, who talks to him, I want to know his every move”.

…..

_Rhaegar has been with his soldiers near the Trident for two days, long enough to have discussed the strategy they will use in battle._

_Before traveling to Kings Landing, he made Arthur promise that if the battle was lost he would protect Lyanna and her daughter. Lyanna is four months pregnant and according to the maester who took care of her it is essential that she rest and not stress about anything, so he said goodbye to her promising that he would do everything possible to return. He couldn't tell her he's going to die._

_Perhaps his death still means that the battle is not lost, although just by thinking about it he knows that it is a lie what his mind tells himself to calm him down. If the leader of the soldiers dies, they have no one to follow and none of them would fight for his father._

_Ser Vaemond snaps him out of his thoughts as he enters his tent._

_"Prince Rhaegar, Jon Connington is here”._

_"Tell him to come in”. Rhaegar awaited his arrival yesterday, but a storm was hitting the lands where his father had sent him, so he only prayed that he could arrive before the battle._

_"Your grace". He bows_

_"I am not your grace yet my friend”._

_“But you will be when this war is over and no one will support your father. All the men here fight for you, because they believe in you. Very soon you will be the King of the seven kingdoms”. Rhaegar gets up and gives him a hug. Jon has always been a man of great faith. When things go wrong, he knows that somehow everything will go back to where it should be. He wishes he had that same faith now._

_“Your letter said that you urgently needed my presence. I am at your service”._

_"I know, that's why you are the only person I trusted for this task”. Jon smiles and for a moment he sees his face light up. Jon's father was always tough on him despite his achievements, he never recognized him as he deserves. Rhaegar believes that Jon sees in him a kind of brother and appreciates his friendship._

_Rhaegar walks over to the table where battle strategies are planned and gestures for Jon to sit next to him. “You must deliver this letter to Jaime Lannister, there are instructions here so that he, Elia and the children can escape from Kings Landing, it doesn't matter if we win today or not, they must go. A boat will wait for them at Blackwater. To get there, they just have to follow the passage written in this letter. I trusted you to deliver it”._

_Jon seems confused "And where are they going?"_

_"Dorne, they will be protected there; Oberyn Martell knows the plan and will wait for them”._

_“But it is very likely that you will win the battle…it may be too hasty to send them to Dorne, you know they do not like the Targaryens. You may never see your children again”. Rhaegar isn't surprised that Jon didn't even mention Elia. They've never had a good relationship despite their attempts to get along._

_"Nothing is assured in this world, my friend." Despite Jon's discontent with Elia, he knows what he will do when asked._

_“I was hoping to fight alongside you. Protect you. But if this is your wish for me, I will immediately take my horse and set out on the journey”._

_"Thanks Jon, you don't know how much I appreciate this”._

_Rhaegar sees Jon leave an hour after meeting him and when he sees him riding away on his horse, he prays to the seven to protect him and to arrive safely at Kings Landing._

_Little did Rhaegar know that nothing would happen as he expected._


	9. Let The Game Begin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A long and very emotional chapter. Before you read it I would like to clarify a couple of points:
> 
> 1.- The battle of the Trident is not described in detail because I think it is not relevant to Elia's story.  
> 2.- The death of Rhaenys and Aegon is not described in detail either because it seems to me that knowing that they are dead is enough. You will have an idea of the state of the bodies but that is all regarding their death.  
> 3.- What happened to Elia once she got to Essos will be part of another chapter, in this one you will only see what happened to her in Kings Landing.  
> 4.- My timeline is quite short. For example, I know that between Kings Landing and the Trident there are not four days of travel, but it served me better in the story this way.
> 
> -Jaenara wears a dress in the only part of the chapter that takes place in the present. I leave you the link to give you an idea of what it is like.  
> www.pinterest.cl/pin/244390717254505796/
> 
> Finally, I hope you like the chapter....it is one of my favorites.
> 
> See you next week.

**_-One day before the battle of the Trident-_ **

_It's been a couple of days since the troops made their way to the Trident and Elia can't help but feel a strange sense of insecurity. She fears for her children if Rhaegar doesn't win the battle, what could become of them. She is not naive, she knows that the first thing Robert Baratheon would do if he wins the battle is to order the elimination of the possible heirs to the throne as it would be a threat to his reign. In the future, they could get people to support them in their claim to the iron throne and that, in turn, would lead to a new rebellion._

_Despite her fears, the days go by quickly in the room where she and her children are confined. Rhaenys is quite resourceful despite her young age and makes up all kinds of games to pass the time. She doesn't know what she would do without them._

_She has also had time to think about everything that has happened in recent months. There were so many signs telling her this would happen and she wonders if perhaps she shouldn't have fled with her children to Dorne before this began._

_But there is another question that has been keeping her awake lately, she doesn't know if she will ever be happy again, or sadly, if she really ever was. Maybe she was just in a bubble that took a long time to burst, but when it did it was like a hurricane sweeping through everything, showing her the true reality._

_"You're thinking too much princess". Jaime Lannister brings her out of her thoughts by peering through the passage that has an entrance in the ceiling of her room._

_"I have to occupy my time in something, Ser Jaime”. She gets up and places a wooden box so that he can jump into it._

_"An advice…." He looks more tired than usual when he grabs the edge of the roof and drops into the wooden box. "Do not think too much. When you do, you waste time wondering...what would happen if or why I didn't do this... it's better to act and if you're wrong...” He shrugs, “It’s worth the risk”._

_She gives him a smile and gestures for him to sit with her on the bed._

_"Where is Princess Rhaenys?" He says looking at Aegon who is sleeping soundly in the middle of two cushions._

_“She's under the bed sleeping with the Balerion”. Elia smiles._

_"Then it's better to be quiet”. Jaime says in a low voice "We don't want to wake Balerion the Black Dread”. He scoffs._

_Elia laughs; Jaime has been practically her only company since the rebellion began. She is not allowed to receive unsupervised visitors or leave the room, all orders from Aerys, as he does not trust her because she is not a Targaryen. Despite this, Jaime Lannister visits her every day without fail. She thinks the guards know, but they don't object and just turn a blind eye. Because they even let her out for a couple of minutes, always warning her not to go too far and that no one see her._

_Getting serious, she asks "Do you have any news?"_

_"Nothing new princess...but calculating travel times I think that today or tomorrow there should be news”._

_"Do you think….” Elia doesn't know if she really wants to know the answer "Do you think Rhaegar has any chance of winning?"_

_“The battles are complex princess, sometimes you can have everything to win but a better strategy from your opponent can be the point of difference. If you ask me by numbers, I think Rhaegar has a better chance, but only if he knows how to lead them in battle the right way”. The few times he has spoken to her about this type of subject, his green eyes light up. She knows she would have liked to be in the battle, but Aerys is also suspicious of Tywin and has him in the Keep as a way to keep him on the side of the crown. "There is also the surprise factor, Houses that can join the rivals in the middle of the battle, or sometimes just luck, princess”._

_Elia looks at Aegon and strokes his bare foot "I fear for them ... you know what will happen if Rhaegar loses”. The baby is moving only a little, but is still sound asleep._

_Elia feels Jaime's hand on her shoulder to get her attention "You know how many times I had to stand guard and listen to how Aerys hurt Rhaella….so many times that I can't count them with my two hands”. His eyes that just a few seconds ago were shining now look sad and enraged. "I'm not going to stay at anyone's door listening to how they get hurt. No matter what happens if we win or lose…you will be my queen and your children are the future heirs of the crown. I will do everything in my power to protect you and them. Even if I have to protect them from my king. Being king does not give you the right to hurt people just because you can…..I took an oath to protect my King and Queen even if it's between them”._

_The passion with which he makes these statements leaves her speechless so she simply hugs him and tries to put all her gratitude into this hug._ _Somewhat surprised, Jaime takes a few seconds to return it until she feels his arms surround her. "I must go or Aerys will realize that I am taking too long”._

_They both stop embracing and Elia watches him climb the same passage through which he came. Jaime turns to look at her, without knowing it, for the last time._

_“Rhaegar asked me to take care of you in his absence, but even if he hadn't asked, I would have done it anyway. See you tomorrow princess Elia”._

_"Thank you Ser Jaime ... see you”._

_That was the last time Jaime Lannister saw Elia Martell or her children, the next day at the usual time of their visit, chaos had unleashed and when he ran to the room in search of them to take them to a safe place it was empty._

_….._

**_-Day zero, Somewhere on the Outskirts of Kings Landing-_ **

_"Fool girl, they'll eat her alive." Says one of the men tearing a piece of meat with his teeth from the rabbit they hunted recently._

_"But a fool who will have us living like kings”. Laugh the other._

_"That's right, after this we can retire to Essos”. Says the third, drinking wine._

_After a couple of hours, the men pack their belongings and saddle up their horses to head to the point near Kings Landing where they know they will meet the knight they need._

_"I thought better of it and we don't need the children, only the woman”. The rest of the men agree "It is very difficult to deal with fucking brats and I want to enjoy the whores of Essos without worries”._

_They all laugh._

_….._

****

**_-Day zero, Somewhere near Kings Landing-_ **

_Jon remembers the first time he saw Prince Rhaegar Targaryen when he was nothing more than a squire in Kings Landing, the image of him was so overwhelming that it made his skin crawl when he saw him. Everything about the prince indicated that one day he would be a great King and from that moment Jon decided that he would do whatever it took to help the Dragon Prince in everything he needed. For this reason he accepted this mission to help Elia and her children, despite his desire to fight alongside his prince._

_His wish was to kill Robert Baratheon with his sword and bring his silver prince the victory of the Rebellion, but Rhaegar's wish for him was this._

_If Jon perfectly remembers the day he met Rhaegar, he also remembers the day he met Elia Martell._ _On their wedding day, Jon knew that she was not worthy of the prince, that she was not the right woman to be the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms and he was not wrong._

_His thoughts are interrupted when he sees three men sitting near a campfire._

_One of them stands up when he sees him and when he speaks he has a different accent that he's sure he has heard before. "Ser Jon, we were looking forward to your arrival”._

_Jon watches them from his horse, analyzing the position of his sword and how long it would take to draw it if necessary “My arrival? Excuse me, but I don't think we know each other”._

_"Of course not, but we are here for a common mission”. Jon raises an eyebrow in response. "We are envoys of Prince Oberyn of Dorne”. The man takes his hand to remove something from the side of his clothes, but before he can do so, Jon draws his sword and points it at him._

_"I wouldn't do that if I was you”._

_“I'm just going to get a letter the prince gave me. He knew it would be difficult for you to trust me”. Jon watches with doubtful eyes as the man slowly pulls a paper out of his pocket and hands it to him._

_The letter has House Martell wax stamp on the outside. When he opened the letter it detailed Rhaegar's plan, everything he told him a few days ago. In the end, the Prince of Dorne expresses his wish that these men can accompany him as he does not trust Prince Rhaegar after all the damage and humiliation his sister has suffered in their marriage because of him. He just wants to make sure her sister gets safely to the ship that will transport her._

_“As Ser Jon will see, we are only here on the orders of our prince to ensure that the princess and her children reach Dorne. You will understand that with all the events that have led to this war, the prince is…doubtful…of Prince Rhaegar's good faith towards his wife”._

_Jon's eyes catch fire hearing this unknown man insult his prince. “Rhaegar is a man of honor; he would never break his word. He promised that his family would come to Dorne and that will happen. I'm here for that, I don't need your help to complete my task”._

_"We don't question your abilities, Ser Jon; we just want our princess to come home”. Says another of the men walking towards him “Prince Oberyn has also instructed us to charter a second boat to cover any possibility that the first one fails. We're not going to lie, it's a bit of a mistrust of Prince Rhaegar too, but Ser Jon, can you really blame a brother for doubting a man who ran off with another woman and left his sister alone?”_

_Despite how much he esteems Rhaegar, he knows that men are right, no matter the prince's reasons for abandoning Elia and how just those reasons are for Jon, such as her weak health and inability to have more children, to name a few of her flaws, Oberyn is her brother and if the rumors about him are true, he's sure he doesn't trust Rhaegar._

_Jon analyzes the letter in his hands for the last time. Although a House wax stamp could easily be replicated, the information is not; it is impossible for these men to know the plan in such detail, as initially only Rhaegar and Oberyn knew about it. Also, how would they know that Rhaegar would send him on this mission?_

_He does not know the situation in the Red Keep and although he wants to believe that his capabilities are sufficient to remove an adult and three children from that place, three more men could make a difference if necessary._

_Jon looks at them and nods saying "Don't delay me”. He makes his horse run without even waiting for the men. He is sure they will follow him anyway._

_….._

_The four men ride through the streets of the city, if you pay enough attention you can hear the cries of the children in their houses but apart from that and the wind blowing, the city is very quiet,_ _Jon assumes that people are sheltering in their homes because they know that if the crown loses, the city will be sacked even though they are not to blame for anything. Worst of all, the same man who sent his troops to sack the city would be the new King._

_"Did you hear that?" None of the men told Jon their name, although they didn't talk much on the way either because Jon doesn't trust them one hundred percent, so he has identified them by their appearance. The man who spoke to him now is the one with a braid in his hair._

_"What?" Then Jon hears it, it's the sound of screaming. "We must act fast; surely Robert is trying to sack the city”. As soon as Jon finishes speaking, an arrow appears from one of the alleys and hits the man with a thick beard on the head._

_"Motherfucker!" yells the braid man as another arrow passes close to his face. The sounds of approaching horses make Jon realize the situation; Robert's troops have already entered the city._

_"Ser Jon, we must get the princess out now or it will be too late!" Jon knows that by this time Aerys must have been informed of the infiltration to the city, so he must have ordered to seal the doors of the Keep for their safety so that the only way to enter is through the secret passages._

_Luckily for Jon he knows one perfectly._

_Jon guides them through the chaos that has broken out in the city, fighting Robert's men around him._

_The chaos and adrenaline of being in battle prevents Jon from realizing that the men seem more interested in the princess than in her children._

_….._

**_-Day Zero, Reed Keep. Elia-_ **

_The afternoon breeze caresses Elia's face on the balcony of her room and takes her out of her thoughts. Jaime said that today there could be news._

_Maybe today everything is over and she can finally have a quiet night without horrible nightmares where her children die._

_She is about to go back inside when she thinks she hears something in the distance that looks like screaming; At first she thinks they are children playing, even Rhaenys is sometimes very effusive in her squeals if she is angry or very euphoric but she stays a few seconds to hear better._

_They are screams of women._

_She tries to stay calm when she sees her children playing on the ground with Balerion._

_"Rhaenys darling, can you see your brother while I talk to the guards who take care of us?" The girl smiles at her and nods._

_Elia goes to the door with the intention of going out and talking to the guards since they cannot hear her from outside,_ _Aerys accidentally chose for her a room that is made of soundproofing material, so whenever she wants to talk to them she must go outside or if they want to talk to her they must come in, which has been especially beneficial with Jaime's visits. that way they can talk more in private._

_"Ser?” She turns the doorknob, but it's stuck and no matter how hard she tries, there's no way to open it. She thinks about yelling for help, but remember that no one would hear her, only her knocks on the wood and no one could disobey Aerys and let her out, if he locked her up then it was her problem. It's sad, but that's the way things work at the Red Keep, they're all selfish wretches._

_"Mommy?" Rhaenys voice makes her come back to reality she has to think fast._

_She turns with a beaming smile towards her daughter "Honey, do you remember how you have always wanted to see what is on the roof from where Ser Jaime comes to visit us?"_

_The girl nods "How about we play a game?" Rhaenys loves games and this one is no exception, she squeals with delight. "Good. Listen, it's a race through the passage but it has rules, you must be quiet, no one can hear you, it's the first rule”. As a good player she silently nods “If someone listens to you; you lose. Another rule is that your brother, you and I must leave at the same time so you must wait until we are all up”. Elia says this while trying to create a kind of woven wrap to hold Aegon to her chest without having to hold him with her arms so she can crawl through the passage more safely._ _"Another rule dear, even when we leave the passage you must keep quiet, the game will only end when we get to your father's room”. Jaime told her one day that this passage led to the corridor where the prince's room is located and if they could get there, they could leave the Red Keep without being seen through a passage that is inside the room._

_When she has the woven wrap ready, she goes in search of the wooden box that she puts every time Jaime comes to the room and climbs on top of it to open the ceiling compartment, she takes Rhaenys in her arms and carries her up "Remember you must wait for your brother and me”. The little girl says yes, barely audible, respecting the rules of the game._

_She takes Aegon in her arms but looks at her dress, a skirt like that would only make her stumble and slow down so she rips her skirt and looks for some breeches that are kept in the bedroom closet, she has no idea who they belonged to but she can tell that they have been here for years, due to the type of material and that they do not look like the ones men occupy today in Kings Landing._

_In addition to carrying her children, she also carries with her a long wooden stick that she had under the bed, for safety, to move the wooden box from above so that the people who enter do not realize that they escaped through that place._

_Once she puts on her breeches, she tightens them around her waist with a piece of fabric from her torn skirt, while doing this she hears a bang at the door, as if someone were trying to open it with such force that the wood creaks._

_She won't let any bastard take her kids from her, not if she's here to prevent it. She runs to the wooden box as fast as she can and carefully delivers Aegon to her sister in the passage. "Take care that he does not move or he may fall, please, my sun." She whispers._

_Before going up Elia looks at the piece of her skirt that was thrown away and picks it up again while the door now seems to be hit by something heavier._ _If Jaime comes for her he will surely think the worst but perhaps he is smart enough to think that she escaped through the passage so she will leave the garment and one of the pins that she wears in her dress at the entrance of the passage, like this, if he opens it from below they will fall and he will understand that they escaped that way._

_Elia quickly climbs to the ceiling, takes the long wooden stick and stretches her body as far as she can to push the wooden box away._

_Once Aegon is in her arms, she closes the ceiling hatch and tells Rhaenys that the race has started._

_……_

**_-Day Zero, Reed Keep. Jaime-_ **

_"Who the hell closed this fucking door?" Jaime Lannister bangs the door with his fists trying to open it, Princess Elia and her children are inside and apparently Aerys, before he killed him, gave the order that all the guards take care of the sacking of the city and protect him. The selfish bastard left the little princess locked up so she doesn't escape. he calls out their names, but then remembers that this particular room soundproofing._

_At times like these, Jaime is glad he killed an asshole like him._

_"You!" Jaime says pointing to one of the guards standing behind him and that seems to be interested in doing nothing at all. “Go find the guards who were here. I don't care if they're dead. Revive them if necessary!”._

_“I'm not going to go into the city looking for two guards that I don't even know. Also, I don't take orders from a Kingslayer”._

_Jaime walks towards the man and with his hands still stained with Aerys's blood; he takes him by the neck and hits him against the wall. “And who will you take orders from, mmmm Arthur Dayne. Because in case you haven't noticed the bastard isn't here, he's basking in the bloody sun in Dorne, so you will follow my orders or I swear I'll try to open this door with your head”._

_The knight seems to be the same age as Jaime, but still, Lannister's name outweighs most Houses, so he nods and when Jaime lets go of him, he runs towards the stairs._

_Looking at the other knights around him, he says “What are you waiting for! The future Queen of the Seven Kingdoms and her children are there, our duty is to protect them! Find something to open that damn door!”. Neither of the men questions him and together they take out a wooden pillar that used to be a decoration in the hall but that will serve to knock down the door._

_After trying for long seconds and putting all his strength into pushing, the door finally opens._

_"Princess?" The men start pacing around the room, but it appears to be totally empty._

_"Fuck!" Jaime runs his hands over his face, frustrated. "Organize search groups, go all over the Keep, I don't want any corner to be left unchecked" The men leave the room, leaving Jaime searching for the last time._

_He imagines that if there had been a struggle in the room there would be signs of it but everything seems normal, the children's toys on the floor, the tidy bed; nothing indicates that there could have been a fight and he is sure that if someone had tried to take Aegon or Rhaenys, Princess Elia would not have made it easy for them._

_He heads for the door when he hears a meow. "Balerion?" The cat is sitting, looking at him with its huge green eyes, in the wooden box that Jaime used to enter and leave the room._

_Elia and he once talked about the passage; he told her that it reached two destinations depending on the direction you take._ _If you took the one on the right you would reach the corridor of Rhaegar's room and if you took the one on the left you would reach the Great Hall._

_If he was Elia, there would only be one place he would go if he had taken the passage._

_The path through the passage is slower due to the reduced space and the visibility is very poor, it does not make sense for him to follow her through the same passage, he would only lose sight of her, so he decides to run to Rhaegar's room as quickly as he can, hoping his intuition is correct._

_….._

_Jaime has been waiting in Rhaegar's room for at least fifteen minutes, but so far there has been no sign of Elia._ _He even opened the hatch door leading to the passage and called out their names, but got no response._

_"But where could they go?" he thinks out loud._

_"Lannister, I have the men ready to search, you know the keep better than many of us. We need you to lead”._

_Jaime knows that he is right but there is still a possibility that Elia is still on the way “Can you stay here Durran? I need someone here just in case”._

_The man thinks about it a bit, looks up resigned and nods._

_….._

**_-Day Zero, Reed Keep. Jon-_ **

_Jon Connington led the men through a hidden path that leads to the Red Keep kitchen; he had explored that path with other knights a couple of years ago in case they ever needed to sneak away unnoticed._

_Getting to the tower that Rhaegar mentioned is Elia and the children was not easy but they managed to get there unseen thanks to the chaos in the Keep and the fact that Jon knows the castle perfectly._

_"Wait”. Jon raises his hand to stop them and keep them hidden. In the room there seems to be a commotion, there are many men inside checking everything. That just means Elia and her kids aren't here. "I'm going to get a little closer to hear what happens”._

_Jon walks towards one of the pillars and hides behind it to hear what they say._

_"Do you think Lannister did it on his father's orders?" Says a young knight._

_“Who knows, I just want this fucking war to end so I can go home to my wife. I don't give a shit who wins”. The other knight shrugs “In the end, no matter which king we serve, it's the same for us”. They both continue down the corridor._

_With Lannister, Jon assumes that they mean Jaime. He has never trusted the young lion everyone knows Aerys just wants him close to keep Tywin in his hands._ _Before he can return to the two men from Dorne, some maidens walk quickly past him. Jon can't hear everything they say, but he hears one word clearly._

_Kingslayer._

_The bastard murdered his own King, probably Tywin ordered him to do it and that means that maybe Rhaegar lost in the Trident, it is one of the reasons why Tywin would finally choose a side._

_No, his prince cannot have died. He refuses to believe it. His heart beats faster just thinking about the possibility that his silver prince is dead. He won't believe it until he sees Rhaegar Targaryen with his own eyes._

_A little shaken by his thoughts, Jon returns to the men and tells them what he heard._

_“Now more than ever it is important that our princess is safe. Can you think of a place where she could be hiding?”. Says the man with the braid in his hair._

_“They may have gone to Rhaegar's room. It is one of the safest, along with the king's. If I were her I would try to get there”._

_"Thank you Ser Jon, you have been a great help”. He doesn't even see the dagger in the man's hands, he just feels it piercing the skin of his torso near his stomach. The man twists it hard and Jon feels the sharp blade cut inside him making the wound go even deeper. "It's a shame we no longer need you."_

_Jon watches the two walk away as he passes out on the cold ground thinking about how he has failed his prince for the first time._

_….._

**_-Day Zero, Reed Keep. Elia-_ **

_When Jaime said there was little light in the passage it was a poor description of what it really was like, Elia can barely see Rhaenys crawling in front of her and constantly telling her to slow down even though it is a race in the eyes of the girl._

_It took them a long time to get to Rhaegar's room because the exit from the passage was in the corridor and when she makes sure they can get to the room without being seen, she rushes Rhaenys to run to the door but without entering._ _Elia goes in first, inspects it, and realizes it's totally empty. The Princess of Dorne breathes in relief._

_Once in the room, she leaves Aegon on the bed and heads to the door to close it, looking for a piece of furniture that she can move to block it when her right foot hits something._ _Looking down she sees that it is a man's arm, Ser Durran has his throat slit and he is dead on the floor of the room behind a bookcase._ _Elia stifles a scream so the kids won't notice and rushes to lock the door as quickly as possible._ _She moves a dresser that was next to the door trying to make it difficult for someone to open it. She just wants to buy time to escape with her children through the passage that Rhaegar told her about so long ago and that would lead them out of Reed Keep._

_The problem is that she has no idea where the passage is located._

_"Honey, watch your brother while Mommy looks for something”. Elia starts looking behind the huge old Targaryen paintings, moving the furniture or looking inside for false doors, but nothing._

_"Where…." she thinks._

_"Mommy...door” Rhaenys says at the exact moment that Elia watches as someone on the outside turns the knob to open it. Finding it closed, he begins to force it._

_From outside a male voice says "We know you are there. Come out now and everything will be fast”._

_The door won't last long._

_Elia looks at her children and realizes that she must make a decision._

_Before her marriage to the Dragon Prince, Elia Martell longed to know what it felt like to be loved by someone, that love of knights stories in which they could do the unimaginable for their beloved._ _The first months with Rhaegar she thought that she had finally known what a love like this felt but it was not until her children were born that she understood the true meaning of love and everything you are willing to do for that person who loves you and is loved by you._

_"Rhaenys….I need you to do something for me, my sun”. Elia says putting Aegon in her arms and taking Rhaenys's hand in hers. She is so small that when she caresses Elia's face her whole palm covers her cheek. She leads her to one of the wooden furniture that Rhaegar keeps near the bed. It is an old furniture that is full of compartments with mostly things of no importance to someone other than her husband, but the advantage of this furniture is that all the drawers open differently and at least there are twenty of them._

_She opens one of the smaller compartments near the floor "I need you to get in there”._

_"Game?” Rhaenys says with a frown, she has always been a smart girl, despite her young age Elia knows she understands that something is wrong._

_Elia's heart breaks. They will probably never play together again. “No, honey. Not this time”. She kneels down, carefully setting Aegon aside as the door creaks from the effort of the people outside to open it._

_Elia takes Rhaenys's face in her hands and kisses her forehead. “I need you to come in and not come out. It doesn't matter what you hear. I need you to be silent the entire time you are inside. You understand?"_

_"No”. She shakes her head with tears in her eyes._

_"Rhaenys….please, this is the safest place in the world, I need you to promise me that you will stay there until you hear a familiar voice...the voice of Ser Jaime, your father...or mine”. Elia says the last thing to calm and reassure her, more than because she believes it to be true “Promise me that you will. That you will be hidden in the safest place in the world”. She pleads with her eyes._

_Rhaenys averts her gaze to the door and nods in that direction. When her violet eyes return to her mother, she hugs her and kisses her cheek before entering the compartment._

_Elia cradles Aegon in her arms and drops her tears looking at him with pain in her heart "I'm sorry...I have to choose”. She tries to calm down, take a deep breath but the lump in her throat prevents it. "I couldn't save us all...if I left you with your sister you could cry they would find you…. I'm sorry...I’m sorry" She kisses his face over and over again, walking to the center of the room, waiting for the moment when the people outside finish breaking down the door._

_When the door opens. Elia Martell somehow knows that this is the end._

_….._

**_-Fifteen days before the battle at the Trident, Somewhere in Dorne-_ **

_"I do not wish for them to die ... only that Prince Rhaegar believes that is what happened”._

_The three mercenaries look at each other a bit confused by the request; no one has hired them before to make it look like someone is dead._

_The leader of the three men speaks “Excuse me, my lady, but it seems to us that your plan is a bit absurd, we are mercenaries, our job is to kill, is what we do best. Why don't we just kill them and so you get rid of them”._

_"No. I will pay you very well for doing exactly what I tell you and nothing more” says the woman._

_The man shrugs, “It's your gold. But I warn you that this work will be more expensive than what we talked about at the beginning because you will understand that the dead do not speak, not like in this case, they will see us. We are at more risk”._

_"I understand"._

_Then the woman tells her plan to the mercenaries she hired thinking that gold is capable of buying anything but if you want to be part of the game of thrones without knowing how to move the pieces correctly then you will not be more than a pawn._

_....._

**_-Day Zero, Reed Keep, Rhaegar Targaryen's Room-_ **

_"Princess Elia" One of the men looks at the dresser she had put to close the door "I think you were waiting for our arrival”. He turns his face towards her and smiles at her with his yellow teeth, then looks at Aegon "Where is the girl?"_

_Elia smiles "Rhaenys is very far from here”._

_The man approaches her furious, while the other begins to search the room. He grabs her by the shoulders tightly "Don't lie to me bitch!...I know she's here somewhere!”._

_“I bet Robert will be furious at your incompetence. You will only take two bodies with you. My daughter is safe”. Elia spits in his face._

_The man seems even more furious with her answer, but he sees something to his right that distracts him from answering. He looks at her again and with a maniacal smile says “There will be two bodies, yes, those of your two children. Because we need you alive” He puts a handkerchief on her face and Elia immediately loses consciousness but not before hearing Rhaenys scream and the man say something in her ear, but she cannot understand his words._

_When you make a three-year-old girl promise to stay in the safest place in the world and for her that place is not where you left her but under her father's bed, then you can't blame her for getting out of the compartment and crawling into that place she considers safe._

_It was on that little path that she was crossing silently that the man with the braid who was holding Elia by the arms saw her._

_….._

_Elia has no more voice, she has screamed as much as her small body allows but she keeps trying to scream even though she can taste blood in her mouth._ _Her fingers are shattered in her attempts to hit and scratch the walls of the place where she is, but despite that it is as if her body had blocked the pain or perhaps it is because of what that handkerchief contained that makes her be in a state where she is not feel pain._

_She only knows that her children are somewhere, that they need her, she hears them crying and screaming over and over again._

_Elia Martell continues screaming and hitting a wall trying to reach her children without knowing that they were already dead minutes ago._

_….._

**_-Day Zero, Reed Keep. Jon-_ **

_He knows he can't trust anyone, most likely half the Keep is on the side of the Lannisters to destroy the Targaryen reign. Just thinking about Rhaegar's death makes the pain from the wound in his abdomen nothing compared to the pain in his heart. He should have been there to protect him, he would have given his life for him, instead he is giving his life for a woman he doesn't even like and may not even be alive._

_Jon knows how important Rhaenys and Aegon are to Rhaegar, but he doesn't understand why so much concern for Elia since he left her for another. Although his prince has always been kind, it could be that or that letting her die would be a bad political strategy._

_Whatever the reason, Jon is a man on a mission and not even the fatal wound in his abdomen will stop him._

_He may be injured and his vision worsens at times, but he knows the Red Keep better than the bastards who tricked him and Jon assumes that if they are going to escape with Rhaegar's family they will do so through the passage he showed them. After all, they think he's dead._

_He realizes that his suspicions are true when he sees them almost dragging Elia down one of the corridors. The men stole the clothes of some soldiers because they are dressed like them, very different from their initial outfits; they even dressed the princess in men's clothing to camouflage her. Anyone who sees them would think they are soldiers but Jon would not forget the face of the man responsible for his misfortune._

_He doesn't see Rhaenys or Aegon anywhere and fears the worst. Men like that wouldn't leave them alive out there, especially Rhaenys, who could tell what she saw and who she saw do it._

_Jon waits for them to pass in front of where he is hidden and with what little strength he has left he takes one of the silver vases that adorns a small table and hits both men on the head with it._

_The three of them fall to the ground and when Jon sees Elia her eyes look wild and she can't seem to control her body._

_"We should go" He tries to pick her up but his injury prevents him from trying too hard and he screams in pain. "You must help me….God-dammit!”. He tries again but she refuses to cooperate._

_"They are dead...all dead" She looks around and cries uncontrollably._

_Jon tries to get as close to her as his wound allows. “Elia listen, I know that now you don't see many reasons to continue living but I am going to give you one. Revenge". He tries to get her to look at him "Do you want to stay here and cry like the weak woman everyone thinks you are or will you come with me and take revenge on the men who murdered your children?" Jon hopes the speech somehow gets to her brain, which is clearly disoriented at the moment._

_When Jon thinks that he has not succeeded and that they will both die for sure, he feels Elia's hand brush his._

_"Good. On the count of three we'll try”. After four failed attempts, she finally gets up and puts her arm around Jon's shoulder so he can help her walk._

_When they pass near the Iron Throne room, he pushes her faster when he sees Jaime Lannister with some soldiers, giving them instructions. They must be securing the Keep for Robert's arrival._

_"We have to move faster before Robert's supporters come for us”._

_Jon directs them to the passage that will lead them out of the Keep into a forest where he thinks they will be able to fool the men if they manage to wake up soon._

_They can hide there until it is safe to take her to Blackwater bay and to the boat that awaits her there._

_Although he was unable to save Rhaegar's children, he will at least save Elia Martell, who for reasons he cannot yet decipher is very important to his prince._

_….._

**_-Day zero, Forest near the Red Keep-_ **

_The rain falls harder with each passing second and he can't find a place where they can rest and take refuge from it. The forest seems like a huge endless labyrinth, the trees are lush but he knows that in the state of both they could not climb one._

_The mud makes it difficult for both of them to walk and they have fallen to the ground at least three times._

_Jon tried to bandage his wound in the hallway when he woke up with the fabric of his tunic, trying to press it against his abdomen to stop the bleeding. Even though he did a good job with it, over the hours the cloth is soaked and he knows that if they don't hurry he will die before he can get her to the boat._

_The forest is the longest way to reach Blackwater Bay, but the most direct paths are inside the Keep through the king's room, Rhaegar's room, and the dungeons. Neither of those options was viable, they would have caught them before they could reach any of them, so his best option was to go out into the forest through the kitchen that was practically empty. Nobody thinks of food in the middle of a war._

_Elia doesn't seem to get better, he only hears her muttering nonsense next to him and when he looks at her from the corner of his eye she seems scared. Men's clothing makes her look very different and the men who kidnapped her cut her hair and tied it up. If someone saw her now they wouldn't even recognize her as Elia Martell. But Jon realizes something else right now, maybe she's not the weak woman he thought she was; anyone else would have broken down and given up right now with everything she's had to go through in just a couple of hours. But she managed to get her children out of the room where Aerys left her locked up, the only way is that she has left through one of the passages and he knows how difficult it is to cross them even more with a baby of a few months old and a little girl.Now despite being under the influence of some substance, she still walks by his side, slowly, but she does._

_Maybe that's what Rhaegar saw in her all this time._

_"But what do we have here." Jon does not finish turning around when the man with the braid pounces on him and causes them to fall to the damp earth. Holding his head against the mud, he tells him “You will not take our princess. This whore will earn us a lot of gold”. Jon can't respond or breathe but he can see the braid man's partner grab Elia as she screams in despair._

_The man finally stops pushing his head against the mud and Jon writhes in pain as he coughs._ _When he has managed to get some mud out of his mouth, he is surprised that the men have a second woman with them very identical to Elia and that she is dressed as the Princess of Dorne would be on a normal day._

_"This cannot be possible…."_

_The second woman is clearly dead a while ago "Everything is possible Ser Jon” says the man with the braid, accommodating the second woman on the ground. “It was easy to find a whore in Dorne who looked like Elia Martell....take her to the boat even easier, we lied to her a bit….we offered her a better life....luxuries.....basically we would get her out of the shit where she lived and the fool came happy with us”._

_The second man begins to kick the woman in the face beyond recognition. "Rhaegar's whore wanted us to make it look like Elia and her kids died on the boat….that we rented a second boat and blew it up in the sea, that way everyone would think they were dead”. He turns to Jon and smiles. “But I had a better plan. We will take the princess to Essos; leave this whore for everyone to believe that she died just like her children, and blackmail Lyanna Stark for life. After all, it was her plan…..we just improved it a bit in our favor”._

_"Lyanna..." Jon would never have guessed that it was the young Stark who came up with a plan like this. Silly girl, how could she not think that these mercenaries could betray her?_

_“Well technically she didn't want anyone to really die just for the prince to think that but you can't always have what you want. Don't you think you're Jon?_

_“Take her to the port and wait for me there; I'll finish the job here. This one is almost dead and it won't take me long but I'd rather you keep going; I don't want any more delays”. The second man, with his instructions, takes the real Elia Martell, puts her on his shoulder and walks away from them. Elia lifts her head and looks at Jon as the man takes her away. He gestures "I'm sorry" with his lips, not only for not saving her now or her children, but for hating her from the beginning just because she could have what he could never have, even if she hadn't married Rhaegar._

_She only looks at him with the rain falling down her face, she is not able to say anything, but she takes her hand to the necklace on her neck, one that her brothers gave her as a wedding gift and tears it off, dropping it into mud._

_Jon smiles at her. Elia Martell would have been the Queen the Seven Kingdoms has waited for so long. And she will be if anyone can find the necklace. There is no way this object would be that far from the corpse and in the opposite direction to where it would be if she was running away from someone,_ _even if the people who were chasing her wanted to steal the jewel, why would they leave it on the ground without taking it? It makes no sense. Someone must be able to decipher that there is something strange about the scene._

_The fake Elia is very identical to the original but he is sure that if his brother or Rhaegar himself examine it closely they can find some difference that makes them doubt. And if that doesn't happen,_ _Jon knows there is no such thing as the perfect plan_ _, and although Lyanna Stark will be the only person who knows that the princess is alive, she will make a mistake at some point, Jon is sure of that. Or at least he prays to the seven in his mind that she makes a mistake._

_Jon tries to look at her until his vision can no longer distinguish her in the distance._

_“Now, Ser Jon, I was thinking of letting you die like this, but the last time I thought you had died you were very persistent. So this time I'll make sure the job is done”. He takes out a dagger from his clothes and walks over to Jon._ “ _I wish you a safe journey, Ser Jon. Too bad we were on opposite sides. I respect men who are like you, stubborn and that nothing stops them. Not even death”. He kneels next to Jon "I think this time I will go for the heart, so we can be sure that it will be a final death”. His yellow teeth are the only thing Jon can best make out on his face as the man places the dagger on the skin where his heart is._

_"I'm not afraid of death...." Jon says with difficulty._

_"Neither do I”. The mercenary smiles without realizing that Jon's right hand was on his waist, pulling out a small knife that he always carried there._

_"Good. Because I'm not going to go alone”. Both men thrust their weapons into each other's heart and the man with the braid immediately stops breathing and falls dead on top of Jon._

_Jon's head turns to the right side and his last vision as a living man is the fake Elia, how the rain washes the blood from her body and face._

_…._

**_-Day Zero, somewhere near the shore of Blackwater Bay. Mercenary-_ **

_The last of the mercerarians alive is worried that his partner has taken longer than usual to return._

_The news of Rhaegar's victory at the Trident is already known to the soldiers and people of the city. They heard it when they were leaving the Red Keep._

_He decided to wait near the place where the ship that will take them to Essos awaits; many people and soldiers roam the coast. There are a lot of Westerlands soldiers who seem to be putting order in the city and helping people._

_It seems that Tywin Lannister has already chosen his side and of course he is the winning side._

_He starts to get nervous, they have to leave soon or someone might recognize her._

_….._

**_-Day Zero, somewhere near the shore of Blackwater Bay. Ronnel Donniger-_ **

_Ser Ronnel Donniger only wishes to return home to his wife and son, in his opinion this war was lost from the beginning. House Baratheon had many points against it._

_Many Vale soldiers like him were sent to the city in hopes of reaching the Red Keep and ending the war by conquering Kings Landing, but even a simple knight like him can realize that the strategy was bad and only made Robert lose soldiers who could have supported him on the Trident._ _If they had the Lannister army, things might have been different, but Tywin never picks the losing side._

_Ser Ronnel is organizing the soldiers who came with him from the Vale to return home when he sees two soldiers from Reed Keep who are quite far from them. One is sitting on a rock and the other is next to him affirming the man, it seems that the second is injured._

_"Ser Cameron, can you keep organizing the men? I'll go see if they're okay”._

_Ser Cameron looks in the direction Ronnel is pointing and shakes his head. "You'll get in trouble”._

_“Not because they are Rhaegar soldiers, it means we cannot help. They are people, like us”. He says indicating to Ser Cameron to continue organizing the troops._

_"Hey...do you need help?" He says drawing the attention of the men. One of them, the one who is affirming the other, looks at Ronnel with panic on his face, he takes the man who was sitting on the rock, puts him on his shoulders and runs with him, but it is when the man raises his head that Ronnel realizes that is a woman, not a man. The woman could be in danger._

_"Hey! Stop!" He runs after the man to a rocky section of the bay._

_He looks for the man with the woman but does not find them until he feels a noise behind him; he turns in time to avoid the blow. Both men face off with their swords but Ser Ronnel manages to be faster than him and knocks him to the ground without realizing that the place where he falls is full of small sharp rocks that pierce the neck of the supposed soldier._

_"Where is the woman!" Ronnel kneels beside him but all that comes out of the man is blood from his mouth and he dies almost instantly._

_Ser Ronnel Donniger organizes a small group to search for the lost woman but after hours without success his soldiers convince him that there is not much to do and they must return to the Vale because, although the war is over, nothing assures them that if they stay longer they will not be taken prisoner for treason._

_Still a bitter feeling remains in the man._

_He just hopes that feeling becomes less bitter seeing his wife Jeyne and son Jonathan._

_What Ser Ronnel did not know is that it was impossible to find Elia since the mercenary hid her in a cargo that was being loaded onto a ship and when he organized the search, said ship had already sailed to its destination. Essos._

_….._

**_-Essos-_ **

_Larra Rogare was wandering through the Bravos market looking for some fabric orders for dresses and wine, when she heard a sound that caught her attention in an alley in Ragman's Harbor._

_….._

**_-Three hours of Rhaegar Targaryen's reign. The Trident-_ **

_"How is Ser Barristan?"_

_The maester looks at him and shakes his head “There is nothing that can be done. His wound is very deep, the warhammer hit vital organs. He has little time left in this world”._

_Rhaegar just nods and thanks the maester before entering the tent where Ser Barristan Selmy is._ _If it hadn't been for him, Rhaegar would have lost the battle, Ser Barristan intervened when Robert was about to kill him with his warhammer, taking the impact directly into his chest. After that everything happened very quickly Rhaegar took advantage of Robert's moment of surprise and that he knew that it would take a few seconds to retract his weapon and hit his sword on the young baratheon's leg causing him to fall wounded. That gave him time to order his soldiers to hold and imprison him. Rhaegar's army had outnumbered Robert's men but they were still fighting as none of the leaders had fallen in battle, once they realized that Rhaegar managed to imprison him, it was all over._

_Rhaegar walks to the side of the Lord Commander of the Kingsguard, who is bandaged and appears to be asleep on the bed. The young prince looks at how the bandage is soaked in blood and knows immediately that the maester was right, there is no way that wound can heal._

_His skin is full of bruises, cuts, and is inflamed in various parts of his body. Rhaegar tries to remember him as he saw him just a few hours ago; he tries to imagine that this new Barristan Selmy he sees in front of him is nothing more than a bad dream._

_The young dragon hears him mutter something and sits next to him trying to figure out what he means._

_"What are you saying Ser Barristan....repeat it to me”. He brings his ear as close to his face as possible to hear him better. What he hears is nothing more than a murmur, but he could swear it sounds like the word pregnancy or pregnant, although Rhaegar knows that he have no sisters or any woman in his family who might be. It does not make any sense._

_The old knight then slowly opens his eyes and the prince sees how the blue is lost in the bloodstains but even so his gaze seems to search his to try to tell him something important._

_"She..... pregnant ..."_

_"Who is pregnant?" He asks still very confused._

_"Find…" It's so hard for him to breathe that Rhaegar can see the effort it takes him to form just a few words._

_"The name Ser Barristan. If you tell me the name, then can I….find her?"._

_The man tries to form a sentence but his words die in his mouth and Rhaegar knows that he has already lost him. The young prince had never seen someone who was important to him die from so close, seeing how life leaves a person's eyes is different than when you are in battle._ _Just a couple of hours ago he killed so many men that he couldn't say a number, but they were just strangers, men who fought for what they believed was right or some just fought because they had to._

_Ser Barristan saved him because he believed in him, that he would give the kingdom a better future than his father, he told him that when they spoke the night before._

_But he was not a man with absolute loyalty that prevented him from speaking when he knew something was wrong and he proved it once again when he reminded Rhaegar of his every mistake, telling him that this time he would not serve a king with his eyes closed. That his loyalty was for him but also for his family and for the people of the seven kingdoms._

_Rhaegar closes Ser Barristan's eyes with his hand and thinks about his words. He wanted me to find a pregnant woman. A lover perhaps? Or someone he was helping._

_If that's Ser Barristan's dying wish, Rhaegar won't rest until he finds that mysterious woman._

_The young Targaryen leaves the tent thinking about how his search will begin when he sees that the other soldiers remain silent and Ser Vaemond approaches him._

_"News has arrived from the capital...." The man looks at him as if calculating his next words "... your grace”. He says finally bowing._

_The only reason he would call him that is his father's death at Kings Landing, which means something is wrong. His mind then has another thought, Elia, Rhaenys, and Aegon might as well be there if Jon wasn't successful in getting them out of town._

_He looks around and sees how everyone is paying their respects to their new king_ _and he feels panic creeping up on_ _. “Ser Vaemond, you will be in charge in my absence, make sure everything is in order and you will be in charge of the prisoners. I'll go immediately to Kings Landing”._

_The new king chooses ten of his best men and sets out on his journey as fast as his horse allows._

_Only one thought predominates in his mind._

_Let it not be too late._

_….._

**_-Dorne-_ **

_As Rhaegar rode to Kings Landing; in Dorne, Ashara stroked her belly because her baby had been restless all day._

_….._

****

**_-Day four of Rhaegar Targaryen's reign-_ **

_When Rhaegar walks through the door of the Red Keep, he knows immediately that something is wrong. The looks he receives from men and women when they greet him contrast with those of the people who saw him riding fast through the city._ _As people in the streets cheer and celebrate here in the Red Keep, there is an atmosphere of sorrow._

_The new King sees Jaime Lannister walking towards him and that confirms his suspicions, if Jon had arrived at the Keep with his message, the young Lannister would not be here. Jaime seems defeated, even seems to have cried recently, and Rhaegar is sure that it is not because of the death of his father._

_"Where is my family?" Rhaegar asks agitated when he is near Jaime._

_"Your grace…”._

_"Where!" Ask for everyone around you._

_Rhaegar looks around scared; no one seems to want to give him an answer. "If no one is going to speak, I will find out for myself”._

_Jaime takes him by the arm with force, preventing him from passing. "It is not necessary. I will do it”._

_Jaime doesn't say a word on the way, when they get to his room he takes the doorknob in front of him. "Was it worth it?...All this... the deaths....are you happy now…satisfied?" He says without looking at him._

_Rhaegar was going to answer that he did not know, but he thought about it for a second; he thought about what he would find in that room and knew his true answer "No, nothing was worth it if I no longer have them with me”._

_Jaime opens the door for him and lets him in first. A smell of spices or flowers is the first thing he smells but then another aroma can be distinguished. Blood. The king's feet stop when he sees what appear to be two small bodies covered with a white fabric. Blood has soaked the fabric in some areas, crimson stains that give Rhaegar an idea of the terrible image he will see beneath them._

_Little by little he forces his body to move, but every step he takes is as if he were walking on glass that cuts his skin, reaching his heart. He was away from them for so long, doing what he thought he should do. All for nothing, nothing that he believed was true._

_Prophecy is nothing more than a bunch of nonsense words, people give it the meaning they consider correct._

_But there is nothing correct in Rhaegar's interpretation._

_Rhaegar feels a buzzing in his ears; he doesn't know if Jaime is saying anything to him, he just hears a deafening buzz that gets louder and louder as he gets closer to the bodies. He kneels down and runs his fingers through the fabric; it feels cold….Rhaenys and Aegon never felt cold. She and he were the blood of the dragon._

_He doesn't know if he can lift the white fabric and see what's underneath. It feels like when he was a kid and he was afraid of what was behind the doors of the Dragonstone bookstore, it was an unfounded fear but the bookstore had gargoyles of all kinds of creatures from Old Valyria and he thought his eyes were following him all the time that he was going there._

_The difference is that the fear he has now has to do with something real. What he finds underneath that cloth will break his heart. His breathing stops when he finally has the courage to do it in front of his eyes the image is heartbreaking,_ _Who can be so cruel as to harm two innocent children in such a way?. Rhaegar takes Rhaeny's hand in his, she has two broken fingers and they are dirty as if she had crawled on the ground, he brings them to his lips and kisses them while tears fall from his eyes to the body of his little dragon . His violet eyes fall on Aegon, he cannot even think to touch him, he is in such bad shape that he fears that if he touches him it will make it worse._

_But is there anything worse than what his eyes see?_

_Rhaegar lowers his face and kisses his youngest son's forehead, breathing in his scent. "Ziry should emagon issare nyke...." (It should have been me)_

_Rhaegar is afraid to know the answer to the question he will ask next. "Elia?"_

_Ser Jaime remains silent, which makes the King look at him again, the young man has his head bowed looking at the floor "We still don't know anything about her”._

_"What do you mean you don't know anything about her?" Rhaegar delicately covers the bodies of his children and walks towards Jaime "Where is my wife?"_

_"Everyone in the Red Keep is looking for her, I have men patrolling the surroundings, but there is no sign of her”._

_"No sign of her!...It's been four days!" Rhaegar paces uncontrollably from side to side thinking about what may have happened to her. "Jon…” he mutters._

_"Jon?"_

_"Maybe he came and my children were already dead....maybe..."_

_Rhaegar is interrupted by the footsteps of a young man who enters the room soaked in water and mud and bows quickly before saying "We found her in the forest, your grace…Ser Jaime….", he says, breathing with difficulty and looking at them with frightened eyes._

_Rhaegar doesn't wait for him to say anything more and runs off, grabs his horse and heads into the woods._

_The rain hasn't stopped in these four days, Rhaegar's hair falls across his face and his clothes feel heavy from the water. It's as if the gods mourned the death of his family as much as he did._

_He sees a crowd of about fifteen men in the distance and rushes his horse to run faster._

_"Your grace". An old man Rhaegar is sure he has seen before but does not remember his name receives him, they all seem to be in a bad mood and look at him with pity in their eyes. He doesn't want your pity he just wants to see his wife. The man grabs his arm, preventing him from moving towards the bodies. "I warn you that the image of the princess is quite....difficult to see….I just want you to be prepared”. Rhaegar violently removes his arm from the man's hand and pushes his way through the men._

_In front of him lies the body of Jon, a man he doesn't recognize and Elia. The three are covered in mud and blood even though the rain seems to have washed their bodies, there is blood scattered everywhere. All three are next to each other, so Rhaegar assumes they were moved from their starting position._

_“We believe that Ser Jon was protecting the princess due to the position in which we found him and the other man. The wound near his stomach predates the wound that killed him, so it is likely that he was injured when he escaped with the princess… ”_

_"Queen". Rhaegar mutters interrupting him._

_"Excuse me? Your grace." Says the old man in a confused voice._

_"I am the King; therefore my wife is your Queen”. The man falls silent, but Rhaegar doesn't want to hear another word come out of his mouth. The wind and rain seem untamed and they drive him away from the bodies as if they don't want him to reach Elia. But maybe he deserves it, not having the right to see his wife._

_Everything around him loses meaning once he sees Elia. If Rhaegar thought the image of his children was heartbreaking, seeing his wife ends up breaking him on the inside._ _The only thing he can identify on her head is her hair because the skin is totally destroyed as if the person who did it wants to erase her completely._

_"Eli…" Regardless, Rhaegar puts his hand on what is left of her face. "Eli wake up...I do whatever you want...just…don't leave me alone”._

_The men in the forest with him look at each other, wondering if perhaps they exchanged one Mad King for another. Just as Duskendale was the turning point for Aerys, finding his wife and children murdered, is Rhaegar's._

_For four days his wife was here in the damp earth, disintegrating little by little, as if she were nothing more than a rotten fruit. But she was more than that._

_She was his Queen._

_"Who". The king says touching his wife's dress that it is unfamiliar to him. He doesn't remember she had one like that, but she may have bought it in the last four months._

_He lost so much in just four months. Time with the people he loved is just one of them._

_"We know that the man here is involved in the...events...but we still don't know who sent them or if other men are involved”._

_"You don't know…." Rhaegar's hands are soaked with blood. "And what the hell do you know!" He stands up and looks at the men behind him. "_ _You were supposed to be here to take care of your Queen and our children, you piece of shit!" Rhaegar starts grabbing mounds of mud in his hands and throws them at the men with all his might. "I don't want to see any of you...Go away!" He says he keeps throwing mud at them._

_"We cannot leave you alone, your grace...we do not know if there are people in the forest or..." begins one of the soldiers covering himself with his arms to prevent the mud from entering his eyes._

_"What!...are you going to defend me?" he stops collecting mud, takes a deep breath and pulling his hair says. "You can't even defend yourself….useless idiots!" The king sees the men's faces, including Jaime who arrived shortly after him but has remained silent._

_They look at him like some people_ _looked at his father. Afraid of what he might do next._

_He doesn't want people look at him that way._

_Rhaegar turns around, looks at his wife and lies down in the mud next to her putting his ear to her heart._

_He closes his eyes and imagines that it is still beating. That beats with hatred for him, but it does, far from here with her brothers, in her land._

_"Stand back a bit, give the King some privacy, I'll stay closer if he needs me”. Jaime Lannister says._

_The men scatter through the forest lost in thoughts and the uncertain future of Kings Landing, while Jaime watches Rhaegar._

_…._

**_-Day fifteen of Rhaegar Targaryen's reign-_ **

_Rhaegar has lost count of how many people have been in and out of his room in the last few days, they always ask the same thing, if he needs something? If they can do something for him?, and his answer is always the same. Nothing._

_It is true. Nobody can do anything for him._

_He can see a new dawn through his window; the king has seen them all since that day. He has not left the room and has only fed on water, but he is not hungry, his appetite seems to have disappeared along with everything else._ _Every time the sun is shining enough to illuminate his hands, he raises them up to examine them and gradually sees the dried blood still on them becoming clearer to view._ _Sometimes if his mind is really distorted, he not only sees the dried blood of his family on his hands, he also sees fresh blood dripping between his fingers staining the blue carpet in the room._ _He knows it's not real, but at times like that he wishes he didn't have his hands. Perhaps it is the punishment of the Gods; after all, his hands are stained with the blood of his wife, children, his mother and even his father._

_Even if he washes them and removes all traces of blood on them, they will never stop being stained._

_Other days he feels small hands pulling at his clothes, like Rhaenys did when she wanted to get his attention. Those days he gets carried away by fantasy and gets lost in his thoughts._

_But there are other days as well….when he walks to the edge of the window, closest to the precipice and lists the reasons for staying and the reasons for leaving. The most powerful reason that always stops him is that he doesn't know if there is a place that people like him would go to after they die._ _What if there is nothing but the world we live in? If so, he would be a coward for not paying the consequences for his actions. And what about Lyanna? She is not to blame for anything that happened. It is not fair that he leaves her abandoned in a world that will judge and condemn her for having fled with him._

_The maester arrived on the second day to tend to his wounds; he applied a liquid to those that were deeper._ _He had used that same liquid before and remembers feeling a burning on his skin that he did not feel this time. Rhaegar only feels a weight on his chest as if an animal had its paw resting on him and just pressed and pressed without letting him breathe._

_How are you supposed to guide an entire kingdom if you can't even guide yourself to the right path? Everything he believed in, what guided him all his life, nothing was real._

_The only thing left now are the memories, some bad and some good, but only images from the past. His mother's sweet voice, Rhaenys's laugh, Aegon's face, Elia's eyes. Will his memory eventually forget?...he hopes not, he doesn't want to forget._

_"Your grace?" The maid enters the room with uncertain steps, he believes that they doubt how their king will react. "Ser Jaime is here as you ordered”._

_"Thanks Ana" Once the woman has left the room, Rhaegar gestures for Jaime to come closer to him._

_"I guess you call me here because of my new name….Kingslayer….I don't think there is a person in Kings Landing who doesn't call like me that these days”._

_"It seems that I am the new king for that reason”. Rhaegar turns to Jaime._

_"With all due respect….your grace….a filthy king”. The young Lannister says covering his nose. "If you want people to really see a king and not …this…that is in front of me, you should take a bath and take responsibility”. Rhaegar knows that what Jaime says is true, the longer it takes him to leave this room, the more restless people will get._

_"Perhaps the seven kingdoms need another king”. He says, looking toward the horizon._

_"Oh yeah you're right, why don't you pass the crown to Viserys? I think an eight-year-old will have a lot more capacities than you to rule or better yet Daenerys, she's only days old so it would be Like a new beginning. You have two paths Rhaegar, to remain the fucker you have been until now or to make amends for your mistakes and build a better world for the people who live in your kingdom._ _That's what a true King does, not like your father who wanted to burn down the entire city….every man, woman and child….he wanted to turn us to ashes. That's why I killed him. In case you are wondering and I am willing to pay the consequences because unlike you I am not afraid to do what is necessary”._

_Somehow that information does not surprise him, his father was more unstable with each passing day and anything was expected of him. "I had a plan…I was going to get them out of here….How am I supposed to go on without them?"_

_"What are you talking about Rhaegar….what plan?"_

_"There was a boat….and….they were supposed to be in Dorne now" Rhaegar looks at his hands again and sees them soaked in blood….maybe this is not real…..maybe Jaime is not here._

_Jaime Lannister grabs Rhaegar by the shoulders and shakes him, drawing his attention, forcing him to focus his gaze on him. It seems as if the king is lost in his mind in a place known only to him._

_"What do you do when you lose everything?" Rhaegar asks whoever is in front of him. A real person or maybe it's his conscience._

_Jaime Lannister looks at him with an implacable face. "You get up and move on for the people who need you”._

_"But I did…I killed them all..."_

_“Yes, you are to blame for many deaths and I hope your conscience will remind you of that for the rest of your life… but you have a family that needs you and the people of the seven kingdoms as well. Do you want to do something to make up for everything you did wrong? Rule better than your father, better than any bloody king the Targaryen dynasty has ever known. Give everyone a chance to live a better life”. Now Rhaegar understands what Arthur saw in Jaime the day he made him a knight. "I'm not going to honor my vows with another King who is worth shit, so decide…. you are going to be the King that the realm deserves, the brother and father that your family needs, the husband that the woman who is traveling now to Kings Landing needs or will you be Another King who doesn't give a fuck about anything, because I assure you Rhaegar this time it won't take me years to do the right thing”._

_Rhaegar's eyes are cloudy for the first time since he found the bodies of his family, after that day no more tears came out of his eyes; it is an overwhelming feeling to finally be able to cry._ _The day he found them he felt anger, pain, anguish, many emotions but the next day the tears simply escaped him._

_A sound of agony comes out of his mouth, like a wounded animal, and finally tears fall freely down his face._

_Jaime Lannister has seen few people cry in his life, his father raised him and his brothers to be strong and not break down and he is sure that Aerys raised Rhaegar the same way._ _He believes they are similar in that, they both grew up under the wing of a loveless father capable of anything to get what he wants. So it's no wonder that Rhaegar has taken all these days to finally fall apart._

_The young Lannister simply lets him vent all the pain on him, although he knows that part of that must also be guilt and self-hatred._

_After long minutes in which Rhaegar finally manages to compose himself, he realizes that they are both sitting on the floor with their backs against the wall. "My brother and sister…are they on their way to Kings Landing?"_

_"Yes. Along with your mother's ashes”._

_Rhaegar nods and gets up off the ground looking at the young lion from above. “I need you to gather the knights and members of the royal guard for a meeting in a couple of hours. We need to start restoring and rebuilding the city”. Jaime gets up from the ground and looks at him approvingly for the first time since the war ended. “I also need to see your father. Lord Tywin is in the capital?_

_“Of course, you know that my father does not miss an opportunity. He was waiting for this moment”._

_“Good. Tell him I'll be waiting for him tonight for a meeting. We have a lot of work to do”._

_"I suggest that before you meet my father you take a bath or Lord Tywin will put you in the water himself and I cannot assure you, your grace, that he will not try to drown you in it”. Jaime laughs and bows before thinking about leaving the room. He takes a couple of steps when Rhaegar looks at him._

_“My father agreed to let you make the vows just to keep your father in his power. I'm not going to be like him, if you want to leave the vows I can free you so you don't have to serve another King who's worth shit”._

_Jaime seems to consider it for a second, he looks around and when he turns his gaze to Rhaegar he seems determined. "If I'm around, I can make sure that you don't become another king who's worth shit". With that, Jaime leaves the room leaving Rhaegar alone with his thoughts._

_If he has people like Jaime Lannister by his side that are not afraid to speak their minds when his king is making a mistake, then maybe he can do this._

_He will not stop being a rotten man inside but as Jaime said he can try to become a king worthy of the people of Kings Landing._

_....._

**_-Day twenty-five of Rhaegar Targaryen's reign-_ **

_The days go by faster now that he has adjusted to his responsibilities as king. The work after the battle of the trident has been difficult; restoring the safety of the people who inhabit Kings Landing is his main objective for the moment in addition to restoring the economy that his father managed so badly._

_This in terms of his responsibility as King._

_Inside, he can't stop thinking about those responsible for his family's death. Rhaegar believes that Robert is guilty, but without proof he cannot incriminate him. Besides, there is the slightest possibility that it is someone else. Another enemy lurking in the shadows._

_He has many of his men questioning people, soldiers, anyone who can give a clue about what happened that day, but so far nothing._

_To all this is added what happened with Ser Barristan. He has tried to find out about the pregnant woman, but no one seems to know who he was referring to either. Besides that in the city there are many pregnant women. It is like looking for a needle in a haystack._

_Rhaegar doesn't give up hope of finding information on any of them._

_Tywin Lannister forgave most of the crown debt in exchange for being the Hand of the king. It is what Rhaegar wanted so there was not much to negotiate, Tywin is an intelligent and very capable man, he proved in his time to be the Hand of his father and it is what Rhaegar needs at this moment. Someone who can advise him in the right direction on matters Rhaegar doesn't handle so well._

_He also needs someone to stay at Kings Landing while he travels to Dorne. It's a risky move to walk away from the real just weeks after taking over as King, even Tywin advised him not to, but he's struggling to let his family go. He just wants a few more days with them. After leaving them in Dorne, he will never be able to visit their graves._

_Viserys, Daenerys, and their mother's ashes will arrive at the Red Keep today and early Rhaegar woke up with a storm of feelings inside him. He knows little about Viserys, although his brother is eight years old, his father kept them apart due to his constant paranoia._

_It's like meeting his brother for the first time, same with Daenerys. He has tried to prepare as best as possible for their arrival, in addition to accommodating rooms and trying to get everything they may need. He wants them to feel as comfortable as possible and start a better life than the one their father wanted for them._

_Lyanna will also be arriving in a couple of days, the journey from the Tower of Joy in Dorne is an even longer journey and with many eventualities along the way, so her arrival has been delayed._ _He gave clear instructions that once she arrives at Kings Landing they will be married immediately in a private ceremony and the official version will be that they were married during their time together; in this way he believes that it will be better for both, her and the baby. He wants to start doing things the right way and if she comes in as his wife no one can talk about their baby as a bastard or insult her for being with a married man. It's a lie, but it will help them to make the transition easier for them and, over time, they can gain acceptance from the people of Kings Landing, as well as trust him again and learn to know her._

_His father, on the other hand, is a completely different story. Rhaegar does not believe that there is a single person who feels some sadness about his death; perhaps his mother would have done it years ago when they were both only siblings but once the marriage was decided between them nothing was the same._ _his father became a ruthless man and after being a prisoner in Duskendale for six months, things only got worse. Not even Rhaegar himself has any feeling of sadness over his father's death, he only ordered that his body be cremated and that his ashes left as soon as possible in the Great Sept of Baelor._

_Rhaegar did not visit his grave or mourn his death._

_His mind and heart have yet to recover, but he believes they never will. Every day he has tried to enter the place where the bodies of Elia, Rhaenys and Aegon remain but he only manages to grab the doorknob,_ _he is not able to see their bodies again even though he knows that the maester has left them in a better state in which they were, trying to preserve them as much as possible for the trip. He doesn't think he has the courage to do it, to face cruel reality._

_The last time he saw Elia she was with Aegon in the garden waiting for Rhaenys, she looked beautiful in a pastel pink dress that highlighted her olive skin, she laughed as she held Aegon in her arms._ _Rhaegar was about to leave Kings Landing in search of Lyanna but at that moment he thought of going down to the garden to kneel and ask for forgiveness. How he wished he had listened to his heart in that moment and forgotten everything else. Elia might not have forgiven him in a long time, but at least she would be here with him._

_A carriage stops in front of the Keep gates and Rhaegar knows immediately that the time has come to reunite his siblings._

_"Have Viserys and Daenerys come directly to my room when they arrive. I wish to speak to them alone”._

_"At your orders, your grace" Responds the maid who was ordering the table where he wants his brother to dine with him today. He thinks it will be a good opportunity to get to know each other better._

_"You don't need to accompany me”. The king says to the guards who are escorting him today._

_Rhaegar has been waiting in his room for a couple of minutes when there is a knock on the door and he sees a woman who he assumes is the one who has taken care of Daenerys during her first days of life and her brother Viserys next to them._

_“Your grace, I am Larissa, the wet nurse who has cared for the princess and the prince in their time as Dragonstone. The Queen chose me a few months before giving birth”._

_"Thanks Larissa”. He feels Viserys eyes on him. Rhaegar tries to sound warm when addressing him. "I am glad that you are well and that you have arrived safely”._

_The child just looks at him and nods, but more than that, he does not show any emotion that reveals his inner feelings._

_The King approaches the wet nurse to meet his sister, even though she is a baby, she is beautiful and has intense violet eyes. "Hi"._ _He whispers caressing her face; Daenerys seems to like the warmth of his hand because she brings her cheek closer. At that moment he promises himself that he will never allow anything to happen to her or Viserys._

_"We change your room to one in this same tower so that we are closer”._

_"Dany will sleep in my room too”._

_"Dany?" He smiles at his brother "How did you come up with that name?"_

_"Mother did it”. Says the little one with challenging eyes and clenched fists._

_The smile fades from Rhaegar's face, he knew it would be difficult to talk to his brother; he is old enough to know the reason that caused the war and the role that Rhaegar played in it._

_“I am so sorry Viserys. I promise you that now things will be different for everyone”. He kneels in front of Viserys to look into his eyes. "No one is going to keep you confined now or away from people and Dany can sleep in your room, I promise, I will not separate you both”._

_"Mother said you promised that things would be different once you removed Father from the throne”. Up close, Rhaegar sees a trail of dry tears on his face and how his eyes are swollen as if he had been crying just seconds ago. “You didn't keep that promise. Why do I have to believe you now?”_

_Rhaegar long before meeting Lyanna was in talks with the lords of the Great Houses to help him remove his father from the throne, they all knew that the situation in the Seven Kingdoms could not continue like this but when Harrenhal happened and all the following events, the number of people who believed in him as a better King decreased considerably._

_“Because a man learns from his mistakes brother, I did not do what was necessary in time and I am sorry._ _I would like to change the past but I cannot, I can only promise that the future will be better and that I will see to it that you have the life you deserve”._

_"I used to sneak out of the room sometimes to go to the yard to watch you train with your swords…. i liked to do it, I liked to pretend that one day I would be like you”. Viserys takes the woman’s hand as if he fears what Rhaegar might do. “But I don't want to be like you. Never. I hate you”._

_"Prince…” Larissa looks at Viserys in horror at his words._

_"Is alright, Larissa, my brother has the right to think and feel what he wants”. Rhaegar stands up and kisses Daenerys on the forehead “Put your things together in one room, we had two ready, but if Viserys doesn't want to stay away from Dany, I don't see why the two of them can't sleep in one room. And thank you for taking care of them and bringing them home”._

_"Thank you, your grace”. She says taking both children out of the room._

_Hours later, when Rhaegar is waiting for Viserys for dinner, a maid approaches the table and tells him that the prince prefers to eat in his room for today._

_That today turned into days, months, almost a full year in which Viserys decided that he preferred to eat in his room._

_The day he decided to have dinner with him and Lyanna was so unexpected that Rhaegar wondered what made him change his mind._ _His brother had discovered the art of influencing pain with his words; he was so intelligent and careful with them that, although Rhaegar had wanted to scold him, Viserys always chose the right words, to say something that he knew would cause pain but not directly._

_The relationship that Rhaegar thought would one day be fixed never came to be and over the years they only grew increasingly apart._

_….._

**_-Day thirty of Rhaegar Targaryen's reign-_ **

_"I must say that I am surprised by your invitation, Rhaegar”. The golden haired woman bows in such a delicate and feminine way that he is sure any man would treat her like she was the queen of his life._

_Cersei Lannister is the only person he knows has the audacity to call him "Rhaegar" these days. Only Viserys or Jaime do. But she's always been bold, she knows what she wants, and generally she gets it._

_"Lady Cersei. I hope the trip to Kings Landing was to your liking”._

_She smiles and walks towards him to walk arm in arm "I don't know if any trip can be pleasant after a war….the roads are destroyed, maybe your first priority can be to solve that problem, don't you think?"_

_"It will definitely be one of my priorities”._

_She gives him a bright smile "You flatter me….now I can boast that the King of the Seven Kingdoms listens to my advice”. Cersei is an even more beautiful woman up close, her skin is flawless and the hours in the sun at Casterly Rock only highlight her attributes. "Although what really intrigues me is the reason for my trip here”._

_“I have a proposal for you my lady. One that can benefit both of us”._

_“Mmmm...tell me, Rhaegar, how can I serve my king?” She stops them and points to a seat among some fruit trees._

_“I'm not going to reign like my father did, but I can't be seen as a weak King either. People involved in the rebellion must be punished”._

_“I thought that after so many days they would have received a punishment._ _Perhaps my father has become somewhat soft to be the Hand of the King….Old Tywin would have advised you to extinguish the Houses that joined the rebellion”. Even when she talks about death she does so with grace._

_"You know your father very well my lady, that was his first suggestion but I have other plans for my reign and I need the unity of the Seven Kingdoms, not more division”._

_"I'm all ears"._

_"I am sure that Robert Baratheon or one of his brothers had to do with the death of Elia and my children, I cannot prove it so I cannot prosecute them, but still, the people who murdered them were sympathizers of the rebels”. There is not even a single witness to what happened that day, the Red Keep was in chaos and no one seems to have seen anything or anyone._

_"My father told me about your family, I'm very sorry, I know what it's like to lose someone you love”. He doesn't know if she is sincere in her condolences but accepts them with a small smile anyway._

_"Tell me Lady Cersei, do you want to be a powerful woman?"_

_The lioness eyes shine. “Rhaegar, I am a powerful woman, it's just that this world is designed for men. It is for that reason alone that Casterly Rock will never be for me even though I am more capable than my two brothers”._

_"And if I gave you the opportunity to show the world how powerful you are”._

_"I hear you”._

_"I'm talking about being the next Lady of Storm's End”._

_"I'm intrigued. Keep going”._

_“Stormlands is a powerful region, almost as powerful as Casterly Rock._ _I know you always wanted your father to recognize you as his heir and the lady of Casterly Rock, but let's face it, your father and mine are two men who, despite hating each other, have a lot in common,_ _so I know Lord Tywin never will”. He turns his body towards her and looks at the fire in her eyes, she knows that every one of his words is true. "I can't give you Casterly Rock, but I can give you Storm's End”._

_“Nothing is free in the world we live in in Rhaegar. What do you want me to do and what do you expect in return”. Cersei's face that just a few seconds ago had a smile and looked like a sweet maiden has now completely changed. It's like seeing Tywin Lannister, cold and calculating but in a female version._

_"I want you to marry Robert Baratheon, if your answer is yes, then I will give you the same power of Robert to make decisions throughout the Stormlands, you will be as powerful as him and Robert will not be able to make any decision without consulting you._ _You will not be a wife who will only be there to have children. You will rule the Stormlands”. He knows it got her attention, but she still doesn't seem so convinced. "You understand, Lady Cersei, what I want you to do”._

_"You want me to make his life miserable, to humiliate him in front of the lords of Stormlands, in conclusion, to remind him every day that my words are your words….to remind him that his king will have him in his hands for the rest of his life”._

_"Exactly"._

_"Hmm, maybe you have more talents than just playing harp and clashing swords, dear”. From the seat where they are you can still smell the burning smell of the city. "But maybe he doesn't want to marry, less to a Lannister”._

_"Robert is informed that I will choose a bride for him and if he does not accept my decision, I will strip the Baratheon family of Storm's End”._

_“If I'm going to have the same power as Robert, then I really don't have power, he may not be able to do anything without my permission, but I won't be able to do anything without his. Each of us will have half the power that will make us spin around and never reach an agreement”._

_“Oh, but there will be a difference my lady. You will not change your last name to Baratheon, you will remain a Lannister and your children will be Lannister, who will be the sole heirs of Storm's End._ _As punishment for their crimes to the crown, House Baratheon will no longer be at the head of Storm's End, if you marry Robert, the Lannisters will rule those lands because your children will be the only heirs regardless of whether Stannis or Renly have children of their own”. Between being left with nothing or marrying the bride Rhaegar chooses for him, Robert had no choice but to accept._

_"You ask me to sacrifice my youth and my life with an idiot who is only good at raising bastards and going to a land where I probably won't see sunlight." She brings her hands to his tunic and pretends to be arranging the cloth. "I would be surrounded by enemies”._

_“I will not send you alone my lady, guards and maids will accompany you. Also, if your brother Jaime wishes, he can accompany you”._

_She finishes "adjusting" his tunic and smiles satisfied with her work "I want a wedding present”._

_"And what does the next Lady of Storm's End want?"_

_"One of my children and one of yours engaged in marriage”. Rhaegar was prepared for a request like this from Cersie._

_"I can promise that in the future my children will meet yours first and if they decide to marry, I will not object”._

_Cersei gets up from the seat and adjusts her dress. "You owe me a wedding present, Rhaegar and I assure you I will collect it in the future”. She takes that sweet maiden appearance again and kisses his cheek. "I guess you haven't talked to my father about this yet”._

_"I was hoping to hear your answer first”._

_"Good. Don't worry; at the end of the day my father will be happy with this union”. Rhaegar kisses her hand and watches her walk away towards the Tower of the Hand._

_Cersei Lannister will become his eyes, ears and voice in Storm's End, but Rhaegar doesn't trust her one hundred percent, maybe the young woman could cover her eyes, ears and silence her voice in the future if that suits her._

_But this is the beginning of the end for House Baratheon. Stripping them of their rights in Storm's End by favoring a woman in a land where most men see them only as an ornament is just the beginning._

_Even if it is the last thing he does, he will find out who was responsible for the death of Elia and her children and when he has the evidence to incriminate that person, nothing will stop him._

_....._

**_-Day thirty-five of Rhaegar Targaryen's reign-_ **

_"Open your eyes”. She whispers, gently stroking the features of his face with her fingers._

_"I do not want". Rhaegar makes himself comfortable on the pillow and breathes in the faint scent that still remains of her even though all the clothes on this bed have been changed._

_"You can't stay here forever”._

_"I can. I'm the king”. He still doesn't open his eyes; he just wants to prolong the conversation a bit longer._

_"You don't think it's time for you to stop sleeping here”. Rhaegar feels her slipping her fingers into his hair, massaging his scalp._

_"If you keep caressing me like this, I'll never get out of this bed”. How many times has she done that in the past? It's such a small action, but now that it's gone, he just wishes he could accurately remember every movement of her fingers._

_“Husband of mine, I am only the creation of your mind. I'm not real"._

_"If I don't open my eyes I can pretend that you are; that you are here and you have not left”. Every day is the same, he goes to his bedroom but the sleep simply does not come. Then he gets up and comes to her room, it is not the same as before, the maids have changed the bedding so many times since she left that there is only the memory that once his wife was here but it is enough to ease his pain._

_"What do you think I would say to you if I were here?"_

_"That I shouldn't forget my responsibilities”. A laugh comes out of him "But you're right, you're not real and we've grown so far apart in recent months that we were practically two strangers”._

_"And that's just your fault, my husband”. Her hand stops caressing him and although it is his own mind that is imagining this, he tries to return her hands to his body but he cannot. “You let me die, remember?....me and our children”._

_"Do you think I'll see you again one day?"_

_"I don't know Rhaegar…I already told you….you're just talking to yourself”._

_"I'm burning”. He whispers into the empty space of the bed._

_"No you're not. You're just lost. Everything is going to get better. I promise”._

_“I don't want to forget you, Aegon or Rhaenys. I feel that with each step I take I get further and further away”._

_"And you do. Your wife arrives today”._

_“She is not my wife yet. You are"._

_“You are a widower, Rhaegar. No one can be married to someone who is dead”._

_"And a dead person can be married to another?"_

_"I guess….but if you do, you would be abandoning Lyanna and your son in the same way that you did with us”._

_"Everything is going to change today, right?"_

_"Yes, but for that you must let me go”._

_"No!". But Rhaegar's fury at the thought of forgetting her makes him open his eyes and see reality. He is lying alone, in a cold bed, talking to nothing._

_He promised himself that today would be the last day he would come to sleep here, it would be disrespectful for Lyanna to continue to do so, but this is the only place in the Red Keep where his mind allows him to speak to her, to feel her. It is torture and a gift to come into this room to have just a few more minutes with his wife, although deep down, as she said, nothing is real._

_Around noon Lyanna arrives escorted by Arthur and the other knights that Rhaegar left to take care of her and keep her safe. Only loneliness accompanies him, even though everyone in the Keep knew that she was arriving today._

_…._

**_-Day thirty-seven of Rhaegar Targaryen's reign-_ **

_Every time Lyanna Stark hears the name of Elia or Rhaegar's children, she is consumed with enormous guilt. She didn't want any of this to happen. She just wished for a fresh start at Kings Landing, one where she didn't have to compete with Elia Martell's shadow every day like she did in Dorne._

_The young queen walks silently through the corridors of the Great Septon of Baelor until she reaches her destination._

_The three bodies are together and the single image makes her burst into tears._

_"I'm sorry… I didn't want anyone to die…no one…I am….." She kneels down crying uncontrollably._ _"I just wanted us all to be happy….you in Dorne and me here with Rhaegar”. She puts her hand on her belly "I can't tell the truth or I would be left alone… I have no family…I only have Rhaegar, if I tell him the truth even though I didn't want anyone to die, he would blame me for everything._ _She whispers to herself. "I'm so sorry….I can't imagine what I would do if something happened to my baby….I can't imagine what you….” She looks at the place where Elia's body is "I know I will have to pay for my actions but that day will not be today or tomorrow…_ _it will not be in this life….I will die with this secret"._ _She gets up and looks at the bodies for the last time “I know we will see each other in the next life and you will make me pay with blood for what I did but it will not be here and now._

_Lyanna Stark wipes away her tears and walks to her room, promising herself that from now on she will never speak or think about what she did again._

_....._

**-Year Ten, Month Eleven of Rhaegar Targaryen's reign-**

Jaenara Rogare dressed today in a simple dress that she is sure will convey the message she wishes to deliver.

The walk to the room where they meet in the morning to have breakfast together feels different to her, colder, darker. For the first time, she feels that a dress is weighing her down despite the fact that the fabric with it is made is very light. In Essos they cannot occupy thick fabric dresses as in Westeros; the heat would make it unbearable.

But it is not only the dress; she feels that everything weighs on her even her own body.

The doors to the living room are open like every morning and she knows that at least Rhaegar, Lyanna and Jon will be inside because they always arrive first. Depending on the day Viserys also shows up and Dany is the last to arrive because she likes to sleep a bit later and her maids take a long time to braid her long silver hair.

Another day, like today, Tywin Lannister joins them.

Jaenara dismisses Ihrra and Ezzara from her side and enters the room.

"Good Morning". She says showing her hands subtly when she talks revealing the beautiful gold ring with the red diamond that Tywin gave her days ago. Her dress is also red without any other type of application, simple, but it combines perfectly with the ring.

“Lady Rogare. You look stunning this morning, like a Red Queen”. Tywin Lannister approaches her and kisses her hand, the same one that holds the ring that represents his new alliance with House Lannister.

"Thank you my Lord”. He takes her arm and invites her to sit at the table next to him while she also greets Rhaegar and Lyanna who were already seated.

"Viserys left very early due to Dragonstone related matters, he took Daenerys with him, so today it will be just the four of us”. Lyanna Stark takes Rhaegar's hand as she speaks to them. “I'm sure he also took her to try to guess what the princess wants for her birthday. Viserys always comes with the most spectacular gifts for her”. She smiles as she tells the anecdote.

"She and Viserys have always been very close”. The maids arrive with the food and that makes both monarchs release their hands. Rhaegar looks at Jaenara to continue the conversation. "When they were little I couldn't separate them, despite the age difference, Viserys has always been very protective of her and they both really enjoy their time together”.

"Perhaps the prince wishes to maintain the Targaryen tradition and choose a sister as his wife”.

Tywin's words make Rhaegar look at him with cold eyes "If that were the wish of both in the future I would not object but I think this is not the time to talk about marriage, especially for my sister who will just turn eleven”.

The old lion bows his head and apologizes for his words, although Jaenara does not see him really sorry.

“Lady Jaenara maybe you can help us find a maid in Essos for the prince. I think someone like you would be ideal, just a little younger. I imagine that a woman like you at your age does not receive many marriage proposals. Such a powerful woman must be a bit intimidating for any man”.

“I thought the same, Queen Lyanna, but the truth is that I have been quite surprised these last days. I suppose that the King of Westeros is not intimidated by my power”. She smiles at Lyanna as she sees Rhaegar's uncomfortable face out of the corner of her eye. No one is ever going to move the game pieces at they will again in the Red Keep. From now on Jaenara Rogare will move each one of them.

No one is going to move an inch without her knowing.

After thinking about the situation many times, she realized that her problem is that her memories and feelings had weakened her since she arrived in Westeros and that is why her enemies managed to corner her on all fronts. But that is over. She came here with a goal and nothing and no one is going to stop her.

Not even if to move forward with her plan she must marry Tywin Lannister.

Lyanna has two options, to make a fuss at her husband by asking him what Jaenara means by her comment or pretending that she was already aware of this. Jaenara knows exactly what her decision will be. “Marriages are alliances Lady Jaenara it was inevitable that with my King we would come to think about this possibility. We weren't happy, but sometimes you have to make sacrifices for the people you love”. She takes Rhaegar's hand again wanting to appear as a united front. “But of course, after thinking it over we realized that it was not the way and we decided to apologize for that”.

_And how does she know that he apologized to me?_

So Jaenara understands, the passage that is in her room and that she still cannot find is the only way for Lyanna to know that conversation. Probably that and the others she's had with Rhaegar.

Lyanna Stark is a clever and skilled Queen.

“Everything has forgotten her grace. It was surprising, that's all, but I am sure that we will reach an agreement very soon”.

The young queen smiles at her and her husband, who seems to have lost his words.

The rest of the breakfast passes quickly, they do not touch the subject again and what they talked about the most was the preparations for the tourney and the arrival of the guests at the Keep.

Tywin must have understood that she did not want their engagement announced yet because he did not discuss the matter until after breakfast when he led her to a corner of the room on the pretext of showing her a painting in that is there.

Jaenara wastes no time and speaks first, getting as close to him as possible. “If we are going to make this alliance, it will be my way. First I want to know everything related to the rebellion, second, my parents must be the first to know the news of the marriage so we will not make it official until I receive their response and third you will inform me of everything you do”. She points to the painting pretending that they speak of some detail in it. "If you don't, my lord, believe me, I'll find out and it won't end well for you”.

"Anyone who spoke to me in that tone would be beheaded”. It says in a neutral tone and pointing to another area of the painting.

“I am not just anyone. I am the future lady of Casterly Rock and the heir to the greatest empire this world has ever seen”. She turns fully to Tywin with a defiant posture.

He examines her and nods approvingly. "I knew you were the one for me”.

"I think I am better suited than Lord Tywin to explain this painting, my lady”. They both turn to see Rhaegar approaching them.

“It's not about who knows the story behind the painting. It's about knowing how to appreciate art”.

Rhaegar doesn't respond but looks at Tywin. "I would like to speak to Lady Jaenara”.

“Of course, you grace. We have a council meeting this afternoon and I hope you can attend”.

"I will be present”.

When Tywin has gotten far enough away, Rhaegar stands next to her "You knew Lyanna had no idea about my proposal”.

"No, I didn't know. How can I know what you talk about with your wife in private?"

“I'm sure you at least guessed it. It was not necessary to mention it; I had already withdrawn the proposal”.

"I think it was very necessary…Now I know that your wife's voice does not tremble to lie. One of the first rules of doing business with someone who has financial problems is to know how far they can go to get what they need".

“My wife is not a liar. You tried to humiliate her".

"Didn't you humiliate her first by offering to marry me without consulting her opinion?" That leaves him silent. Another thing, tell your wife I don't like snoopers. If she's going to spy on me, tell her to do it right”. She looks at him with a mischievous smile. "Have a nice day, your grace”.

"Won't you give me the opportunity to answer you, my lady?" He says as she walks away.

Jaenara stops and looks at him. “No, I have a very busy day. I can't waste time”.

Jaenara walks away thinking…. _Let the game begin._


	10. Raspberry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi.  
> -First POV of Lyanna in the present.  
> -This chapter takes place on different days.  
> -The people who will attend the tourney for Dany's birthday arrive in two chapters, but first there is another birthday girl :)  
> -I hope you like it even though it is more of a transitional chapter, where you can see a bit of the change that the characters are going to develop in their personalities.
> 
> Thanks to everyone who reads the story :)

“Everything is ready, my lady. They're all here”. Ghael says appearing from inside the inn where Jaenara will meet with the men who stayed at Kings Landing to work on the Rhaegar gold mine. The ship in which they arrived was returned to Essos with half the men. She will meet up with the other half who stayed for the first time since they arrived since until now she had only sent Ghael with instructions, mostly so they would have time to settle in the city and adjust. Ghael told her to wait outside because he wanted to make sure everything was in order before she went inside. Jaenara finds it a bit sweet that he cares so much for her even though he is only thirteen years old.

Upon entering, she is greeted by Khrazz, one of the leaders, so to speak, of the miners. Back in Essos he was always one of those who spoke with her and Lysandro since he was one of the few who knew the common language. He was in charge of organizing meetings when they had a request to make or simply wanted to comment on any concerns they had as workers.

For the men to come to Kings Landing they all had to learn the common language; it took them months to learn words and even longer to be able to speak fluently, but the financial incentive of this trip helped their motivation.

Ghael took it upon himself to pay the inn owner to keep the place totally empty while they gathered there. It is a small inn on the outskirts of Kings Landing so it is unlikely that soldiers or knights of the Red Keep will come to this place.

"Lady Rogare”. Says the man with his Meereen accent. When they first met and Jaenara still did not speak High Valyrian, it was difficult for her to understand what he was saying, as the people of Meereen speak a mixture of High Valyrian with old Ghiscari.

"Khrazz, I hope everyone has been able to adjust well at Kings Landing”. The man takes her hand and kisses it in a gentlemanly manner. He had never done that before, so Jaenara assumes they are learning the ways of Westeros.

"Good. Thank you”. She nods. Still a man of few words but she assumes they will progress little by little.

Jaenara looks around; the men seem calm, at least most. But she knows that deep down everyone must be at least a little anxious about the meeting. Jaenara only gives instructions, either herself or through Ghael, to Khrazz and he is the one who informs the others, it is the way they communicated in Essos and the way they would communicate in Kings Landing, therefore, that they are all here should at least cause curiosity in men.

"I want to talk to you first Khrazz in private and then I would like to say a few words to everyone”.

"Yes my Lady”.

They both walk to the second floor where there are some small rooms, all with the doors open to ensure that no one is in the place. When they reach the last room in the corridor, Khrazz stops and signals for her to enter first. The room looks a bit more elegant than the others, so to speak, and it even has a table with two chairs where Jaenara and Khrazz sit.

“Rhaegar will start organizing work at the mine as soon as possible. I don't have the information on the day they started recruiting miners, but I imagine that as we close the deal today, it will be tomorrow”. The meereenese man nods. “Once you are hired the first month you don't do anything. I want everything to function normally, for production to be favorable. From the second month is when you should start with the plan”.

"I understand”.

“If a problem or situation arises that we did not anticipate, you should contact Ghael. You are going to leave a note in the same place that you both use until now. He will check it every day”.

Khrazz nods. Honestly, Jaenara had never met a man who spoke so little. "Anything else you need? Or a question about something?”

“Nothing my lady. We have not had problems”. Finally more than five words.

"Good then". Jaenara stands up "It's time to talk to the others”.

The men are drinking and eating when Jaenara and Khrazz come down the stairs. Ghael is in a corner of the room leaning against a wall, he seems somewhat intimidated by the men even though none of them seem to be paying attention to him. For them, he is just a child.

Khrazz hits a table hard with a jug made of a lightweight material. It breaks immediately, emitting even more noise, drawing everyone's attention. "Lady Rogare is going to speak”. All the men stop what they were doing and are silent. Perhaps Jaenara will use this technique with her future husband, instead of breaking it on the table she will break it on his head. It wouldn't hurt to be a widow one day after the wedding.

Chunks of the jug fall on her shoes and Jaenara shakes them a bit before speaking "Thank you Khrazz" She walks over to the men “I'm glad everyone is adjusting so well to Kings Landing…” She looks at them with a smile on her face. "Part of the adjustment includes getting a house…” Jaenara walks to the right, still looking at them with a smile. “Talk to some people, maybe neighbors….” She turns and walks to the left “Go to brothels...” Jaenara stops in front of a young man no more than twenty years old "Have you been in a brothel….Name?"

“Drako my lady”.

“Drako….have you been in a brothel?" The young man seems reluctant to answer "It's a simple question, Drako”.

“So what if we go to the brothels? I didn't know we couldn't enjoy the whores of Kings Landing”. Says a man who is further behind them.

"You can do whatever you want. If you want you can go to all the brothels in the city or in the seven kingdoms. That doesn't interest me”. She walks again without taking her eyes off the man who challenged her with his comment. "What interests me is what you can say while you are between the legs of a woman”. The smile fades from Jaenara Rogare's face and she looks at them all with what she hopes is a threatening and confident look at the same time. “If any of you speak to any of the women again about the instructions that have been given to you, I assure you that you will no longer need to go to a brothel because you will not have any dicks to put in any of the beautiful women who work there”.

Some of the miners seem amused by her statement, making comments in their original language. Her temper sparked and she fixes her gaze on one of the men who is laughing and talking to the others.

Jaenara walks towards him tilting her head to the side. “You seem guilty to me. Maybe I will start with you to set the example”. She holds out her hand to Khrazz for him to hand her his knife while still looking at the man who now, despite trying to hide it, is afraid of what she might do.

Jaenara needs these men to respect her and although she is not going to do it, she believes that scaring them a little will help to them think better about what comes out of their mouths.

Jaenara feels someone take her hand and slowly lower it. “It is not necessary, my lady. I will personally see to it that they don't talk anymore”. Khrazz says with a conciliatory tone but with a clenched jaw. She doesn't know if he's angry because his men have talked too much or to her for threatening them.

“I hope so or I will make sure that all the men in this inn are eunuchs. Understood”.

Khrazz nods but Jaenara turns her gaze to the man. "I asked if it was clear”. She says with tight lips.

"Yes. Your Worship”. Usually, the meereenese use that phrase and others as _his radiance_ to refer to their royalty. But Jaenara knows that this is his last act of rebellion against her, he tries to mock her by calling her by the name they use to respect the Meereen slavers. Before the man even thinks of bowing she slaps him across the face leaving him with a bleeding cheek, because Tywin's engagement ring is on the hand she used to slap him.

"If you ever disrespect me again, I will cut out your tongue and give it to the ravens to feed on”.

“Ivestragī's Jikagon Ghael. Konīr iksis olvie naejot gaomagon se olvie byka jēda”. (Let’s go Ghael. There is a lot to do and very little time). The child looks at her from the same corner where he was as if seeing her for the first time.

But not in the way that Jaenara wishes, it is almost as if he is afraid of her.

Jaenara does not say goodbye to anyone and leaves the place with Ghael at her side. When they're far enough away, she says, "You know I wasn't going to do it, right?"

He takes his time to respond and the silence makes Jaenara nervous. "Ghael". She takes him by the shoulders and looks him straight into his brown eyes. "When you are young you are idealistic and you see the world in a different way, but when you are an adult the reality hits you in the face, you realize that no matter how good or kind you are, there will always be people who will hurt you. I do not want anyone to hurt you or my parents or anyone but for that I am going to do and say things probably much worse than what you saw in the inn. If I could choose, believe me, everything would be very different. But this is Kings Landing and to protect the people I care about I have be smarter and colder than them”. She caresses his cheek "I'm sorry I scared you but I can't let them think I'm weak or everything would collapse”.

"My lady is different here. I don't understand why we do all this, why you want to hurt the king…he doesn't seem bad to me…it's just….I don't understand”.

“I promise we will both talk and you will understand, but not now. You just have to trust me”.

Ghael nods, though still doubtful.

Jaenara would like to tell him her story, why are they doing all this but then think better of it….if you would keep your secret from an enemy, tell it not to a friend.

…..

Lyanna Stark has found herself missing the old days lately, yearning for that sense of calm and stability that she felt in her life just a few weeks ago.

But everything has changed since Jaenara Rogare came to King Landing.

She is not blind, she can see how each of the encounters her husband has with Jaenara affects him. Both, the encounters that she knows and the ones that her husband thinks she does not know. The years have made her wiser and less careless, Rhaegar still hadn't realized that she knew of all the times that the two of them had gotten together alone to talk in Jaenara's room but after breakfast yesterday she had to confess that she was sending a boy, who is the son of one of the cooks, to spy on the heiress Rogare in her room. She told him it was just a coincidence that boy had been there when he was talking to her. Although her king seemed quite angry about the situation, he did not argue too much because deep down he knew that if he kept bringing up the subject, she would scold him for his nightly visits to Jaenara Rogare, which she is sure are more than business as he says.

Lyanna doesn't know when her marriage began to fracture without her noticing. It runs through her hands like water and she does not know how to stop the situation. Almost eleven years together and it is the first time that she feels insecure.

The same insecurity that led her to make bad decisions in the past and she is terrified that desperation will cause her to make mistakes again.

"Are you alright Lyanna?" Alarra whispers next to her. Rhaegar told her that he no longer wanted her as Daenerys' lady-in-waiting, He didn't tell her why, but her husband never liked Alarra, so it really is a miracle that it took him so long to get her off his sister's side. Alarra was one of her first friends at Kings Landing, one of the only ones who never judged her or looked at her with disdain like most ladies or lords. That is why Lyanna feels loyalty to her, plus she has been a great ally all these years.

"Yes Alarra, thanks for asking”. Lyanna takes Alarra's hand in hers, smiling. "You heard something about….the _thing_?”

"No….it was supposed to take effect immediately, but so far I see her fine”.

"I have not seen anything strange in her either yesterday or today at breakfast”. The young queen sees Rhaegar chatting animatedly with a man and stops. "Alarra, you never told me what you bought….what did he sell you?" She whispers near the young Velaryon.

“The merchant sold me an insect that contained an old Sothoryos disease. He said it was very effective in making someone _disappear_ ”.

"Alarra!" Lyanna's face flashes with anger. “I specifically told you that I don't want her to die. Just that she gets sick or something like that so she can go back to Essos”.

"But you said you didn't want her here, I thought you meant-”

"Nothing permanent!" Lyanna cannot carry another death on her shoulders.

"Alright. I’m sorry, at least she's fine. We can fix it, I'll go find the merchant tonight and ask him what happened to the boy he would send”. The two women argue in angry whispers.

"Lyanna. Lady Alarra”. Rhaegar walks towards them and the young queen puts her best smile on her face as Alarra bows.

"Husband. I came as soon as I got your message”. He takes her hand and kisses it gallantly.

“Good because we have a lot to discuss. There is very little time left to organize before the arrival of the tourney attendees”.

"You're right". She turns to the lady-in-waiting. "You can take the afternoon off, Lady Alarra”. Today I will only dedicate myself to thinking about everything and tomorrow we can start working together”.

"Thank you, her grace”. She says bowing to both of them.

They see Alarra walk away and Lyanna hopes that everything goes well with the merchant.

The king takes her arm for them to walk arm in arm "Jaenara Rogare gave me an answer earlier today".

"And what did she tell you?"

“She said that they reconsidered the situation and would eliminate the clause that specifies that they would be the owners of the entire Red Keep if we don't pay, that is, it will be like at the beginning, they will only own half. But she asked me for something in return”. He sounds bummed out by the latter. “She shortened the payment time to seven months. It is very little time, but I had no choice but to accept it, is it that or to hand over the entire legacy of the Targaryens to the Rogare family”.

"You're sure there's no other way…..maybe if Viserys..."

"No. I've told you a million times, Lyanna, that he doesn't want to marry Margaery Tyrell. I'm not going to force him into a union he doesn't want”. It is always the same with the young Targaryen, Lyanna believes that Rhaegar is very condescending towards him. Viserys knows how much an alliance with the Tyrells would help, but refuses to cooperate. Their lives would be easier if Rhaegar put limits on him, but Lyanna knows that it is partly guilt, as her husband blames himself for the death of his mother and believes that he orphaned his siblings.

"I understand. I don't want to argue, I just wanted to express my point of view”.

"I know and I appreciate it, but I think we will not reach an agreement on this issue”. They both stop at a window that has a seat underneath.

"It is done. I accepted the terms and this afternoon we will sign the contract; now the important thing is to start production as soon as possible. We will be recruiting men for the mine starting today”.

"You have my full support. I don't know much about mines, but I can help out at the Red Keep. I'll make sure everything is in order here and take care of the small-folks who need an audience so you can have more time to supervise the work in the mines”.

He smiles "That would help me a lot”. Rhaegar brings his face close to hers and kisses her lips sweetly.

"You know you can count on me for anything”. Her eyes open and meet her husband's. They have had ups and downs in all these years of marriage but he has never cheated on her, he has always been honest with her, even when the economic problems began in the realm she was one of the first to know. She hadn't doubted him in all these years.

Until now.

The arrival of Jaenara Rogare changed everything, now when Lyanna Stark looks into her husband's eyes, she sees something different in them, something she hadn't seen in many years.

Guilt.

"There is another matter I want to talk to you about related to the tourney”. He takes both hands in his and she can see the wrinkles that appear in his eyes when he's worried about something. Lyanna's heart rate is racing. "I got a raven earlier today, a message with House Martell wax stamp on it”.

She looked at him bewildered. "But you haven't heard from them in years”.

He nods "It was a message from Doran informing me that Oberyn was coming to the tourney”.

"What" She swallowed hard.

"It seems strange to me that after all these years he wants to travel to Kings Landing but Doran wrote that it was actually his idea not Oberyn's, but since he cannot travel personally, he sends his brother" He sighs. "He says he wishes to restore relations between the Martells and the Targaryens”.

“I…..I don't believe in his words….Rhaegar, it could be dangerous….I think you should forbid the prince from entering the city”. If Oberyn reaches the city, he will tell Rhaegar that he sent Arthur to Sunspear to ask if they could meet. That cannot happen.

Her breathing is quickening and she feels like she's sweating all over. Rhaegar looks at her strangely. “I did not trust her intentions one hundred percent but I am not going to insult House Martell by denying him entry to Kings Landing. We will see what we can do at that time depending on their intentions. Do not worry now". He hugs her, rubbing her back with his right hand.

Lyanna Stark vowed never to think about what she did again, but now she can't help but remember her last day in Dorne.

_It has been almost a month since Rhaegar's departure and two days ago they received the news that he won the battle of the Trident. It was an immense relief for her to know that her prince managed to defeat his opponent but she feels somewhat puzzled because all they have known has been from third parties, Rhaegar has not sent her a letter or at least a note._

_But on top of that, she hasn't received anything from the mercenaries either and she was supposed to meet Oberyn Martell today._

_Her thoughts are interrupted by Arthur Dayne who enters the room without knocking first. Something quite strange because he has always been very respectful of her privacy._

_"Ser Arthur….is something wrong?" He looks different, there is something in his gaze, his eyes look at her differently._

_"I received a raven today from Ser Jaime”._

_"Did something happen to Rhaegar?" She puts her hand on her huge belly where her son is desperately moving._

_"Aerys….Rhaella….Elia and the children…They are all dead”._

_She is speechless and her mouth is open, although she was waiting for news of Elia and the children, she never imagined that Rhaegar would be king so soon. "I'm really sorry….for Elia….I know-”_

_"Cut the crap" Lyanna's eyes popped open as he seems sorry for being so crude with his words "With all due respect my lady, I think we both know that you have no love for Elia or the children”. He looks around. “You should start packing. Today we will leave Dorne. I vowed that I would take care of you and bring you safely to Kings Landing and that is what I intend to do”._

_"But….my meeting with-”_

_"You really think Oberyn will meet you now…. he could open your belly and kill your son in front of your eyes while you bleed to the ground”._

_"Arthur, I am sure the prince will understand that I am not to blame for their deaths”._

_The knight looks at her as if another head has grown out of her "May the seven help us if you become the next Queen” Before she can answer, Oswell Whent appears at the door._

_"We must go….in Dorne they already know about the death of the princess and the children”. He looks at her with a wrinkled nose "What are you doing standing there? Move your hands and pack your things”._

_"You can't talk to me like that”. She says as Oswell turns around._

_"I speak to you as I please”. He yells, coming down the stairs._

_“Oswell was fond of Rhaenys….I guess the princess stole everyone's heart. I don't understand how someone can murder children like this”._

_"Murder?" The mercenaries weren't supposed to murder anyone, they would just make it look like they were killed by an explosion at sea._

_"Rhaenys and Aegon were killed in Rhaegar's room, Elia in the forest behind the Keep”. His brow furrows and his eyes fill with tears. “Oswell is right, we should go. Forget about meeting with Oberyn, I only agreed to help you with that because you seemed sincere in your desire to reconcile families, but nothing can be done now. It seemed like a bad idea from the beginning”._

_When Arthur leaves her alone in the room, she takes the pillow from the bed that she shared with Rhaegar for so many months and screams. At what point her attempt to improve things turned into the death of three people._

_She is not a murderer._

"Lyanna….are you sure you're alright?" Rhaegar says in her ear.

She wraps her arms around him and melts into his arms "Yeah…I was just thinking about how everything has changed in recent times”.

"I know, it has been difficult but we will overcome it, I am sure”.

She only hugs him tighter, listening to his heartbeat to calm hers.

…..

Jaenara knocks on the door of Arthur's room in the White Sword Tower and wonders what it is that the knight wishes to speak to her so urgently. "Ser Arthur?"

"Enter". The man is sitting behind a desk, the man is sitting behind a desk, when he sees her he gets up so fast that the ink he had in his hand falls on the table, staining some papers. He blushes and tries to remove the papers that are not stained. "Lady Jaenara".

She laughs "I didn't know my arrival would make such an impression”.

“You leave an impression everywhere, my lady. Take a sit”.

"Ghael told me it was urgent”. Jaenara says getting serious "I have to say that the urgency of the message scares me a bit”.

"I am afraid it is a sensitive subject my lady”. Arthur's eyes darken even when sunlight illuminates the room. "A few days ago we found a child infiltrated in Red Keep who was heading to your room”.

She raises an eyebrow somewhat confused "A….boy?"

Arthur leans back in his seat "You'd be surprised how many kids are used in situations like this”.

"And what kind of situation are we talking about”.

The creases on his forehead deepened. "He was carrying a jar with an insect infected with Red Death”.

Rage pulsed through her veins "And who is the brain behind this unfortunate situation”.

“The boy worked for a merchant, we questioned them both but it is difficult to know who paid him. Usually merchants don't ask questions, they are only interested in getting paid”.

“You really want me to believe that the great Arthur Dayne knows nothing about the person who tried to assassinate me. Please don't take me for an idiot”.

He takes a deep breath “We have a clue, it is not much but we are investigating. The person who bought the insect is a woman”.

"And do you have any idea who that woman is?"

"No my lady. I'm afraid knowing she's a woman is very little. There are millions of women in Kings Landing”.

“And you only know that she is a woman or you are hiding something else, Lord Commander. Maybe a known woman?” Jaenara has the slight suspicion that the knight in front of her is protecting someone.

Arthur's gaze wavers for a second and just that second is enough for Jaenara to know that he is lying. When they were little, she could always tell when he was lying and apparently that hasn't changed. "I have no further information my lady, but as soon as we have a solid lead, I will let you know”.

She stands up "Thanks for the information Ser Arthur” Jaenara manages to see among the papers on the table a sketch of a woman, who despite the fact that he tried to hide behind other papers, it is clearly seen that it is a woman with violet eyes.

"You're welcome my lady. I will put two more guards in your corridor for greater security and I assure you that if we have the identity of the woman, you will be the first to know”.

She smiles at him and nods.

As Jaenara descends the stairs of the tower, she thinks about how many years have passed but nothing has changed in the Red Keep, it was a dark place before and now it still is. Full of intrigues, hypocritical people, enemies in every corner.

She thinks the woman in the sketch is Alarra Velaryon other than her, only Daenerys has violet eyes and Jaenara knows she wouldn't go looking for something like that.

But Alarra Velaryon is just one piece in the game, she's sure the reason Arthur didn't want to reveal her identity is because he must have come to the same conclusion as her. That the young woman did not act on her own but was sent by someone.

The Queen.

…..

"Please”. Daenerys pleads with a pout and sweet eyes. Viserys is able to go to Old Valyria and return when she makes that face; if she asked him on a normal day. But not today.

"No”.

"I will faint”.

"You will fain-….what are you talking about Dany?" His brow furrows and he looks at her strangely.

"Yes, I will faint and say it's your fault when they wake me up”. She begins to rehearse fainted faces and try to fall to the floor as naturally as possible.

"Are you really going to pretend to faint just so I can tell you what your birthday present is?"

She looks at him from the rug, leaning on her hands and shrugs "I did it with Jon once."

"With Jon?"

"Yes, I wanted him to lend me his sword and since he didn't I did it”. Her eyes look up, remembering "I think Rhaegar scold him that time" She giggle a bit covering her mouth with her hand "I told him that Jon had said an ugly word to me”.

Viserys looks at her with wild eyes and then laughs out loud "You are a rogue little dragon, dear sister”. He holds out his hand for her to climb onto the bed and sit next to him. “Speaking of Jon, how have you both been getting along lately? I know that Rhaegar decided that you two would take classes with the maester together”.

"Jon is…..weird”.

"Weird?” He gestures with his hand for her to turn around and he can braid her hair. He doesn't remember when it started, but whenever they are together he braids her hair. Like some kind of tradition.

"We speak little…..not because I do not speak to him-“

He laughs "Obviously not, you can even talk to a stone. Poor stones”. This earning himself an elbow to the ribs. “Dany”. He complains.

"I have a naturally chatty and curious personality; I don't see anything wrong with that Visy”.

"Of course not, my beautiful little dragon”. His fingers comb through her long silver hair before starting to braid.

She snorts angrily "The problem is that he doesn't talk to me much….I think he doesn't like me”.

"Or maybe you intimidate him….it even happens to me”.

"Viserys!" She tries to turn around and Viserys accidentally pulls her hair.

"Don't move Dany….I've already started braiding, you'll pull your hair if you do”.

"You make fun of me." he sees how she lowers her head looking at her hands that are in her lap.

"Dany I was serious. Maybe you intimidate him because you are a girl and you are beautiful. Boys of that age are like that, girls scare us”.

"Did girls scare you at that age?"

"Those that I liked yes”.

She makes a face of disgust “I hope that is not it. I don't like Jon”.

He puts a smile on his face that she can't see. "Don't overreact”.

“You are more exaggerated than me. You hide from Lady Alarra when she follows you like a honey bee”.

"Well, I don't like Lady Alarra; I don't want to give her false hope”. More than not liking her, Viserys distrusts her.

"Mmmm”.

"Mmmmm what?" Viserys is finishing braiding her long hair. It was a bit loose but there are only a couple of hours of the day left. It will hold on until then.

He feels her body tense a little. “And if it is not Lady Alarra, who will you marry? You will have to do it soon now that you will be Lord of Dragonstone, you need a lady”. She takes the braid in her hand and turns to look at her brother "It's beautiful, thank you" She kisses his cheek.

Viserys knows his sister is right, but it's something he hasn't really thought about. For some reason, the women he has met have failed to ignite the flame of marriage in him. "I'll be the Lord of Dragonstone and you..." he flicks her nose with his fingers "You will be the Lady of Dragonstone”. She laughs, but her eyes tell another story "What's wrong?"

"I haven't spoken to Rhaegar yet, when I think about what he will feel when I tell him that I will go with you to Dragonstone in a couple of months…it makes me want to cry”. She whispers the last part.

"Hey" His hands take his sister's face making her teary violet eyes look at him "Is alright if you want to stay longer, you can leave a few months after me or…". His heart aches when he thinks about the other option, but he smiles at her the same way “If you don't want to leave, nothing happens either. I will not stop loving you or I will feel bad because you are staying”.

She hides her face in his neck and he feels her tears "I want to go with you….it's just that….I would like him to come too…for the three of us to be a family”. Daenerys clings to him like her life depends on it.

"And we are….we are a family….why-"

"You both fight all the time”. She raises her voice, somewhat exalted.

"You are too young to understand”.

She pulls her face out of hiding and he can see that she is upset by his comment "When I was five I was very young”. Daenerys wipes the tears from her face. “I know everything that happened… before….I know why you two get along so badly. But nothing is going to change Visy…. Our mother is dead…Aunt Elia, Aegon and Rhaenys too. They will not revive because you hate each other more”.

"Dany…”

“We are brothers…. I want my two brothers to get along. I'd be happier if they tried. I would go more in peace to Dragonstone if that happened”. Just when Viserys thought she couldn't surprise him more. Little manipulative girl, he can almost see her brain working. Although he must give her credit, she is a very smart girl.

"I can try. I don't promise anything but I'll try to do my part”. Tears magically disappear and a bright smile is the last thing he sees before she throws herself into his arms.

“That is all I ask. Thank you”. She sits across from him again. “There's something else I should tell you about Jon”.

"Mmmm”.

"I think Jon is not cut out to be king”.

He raises both eyebrows in surprise. "And why is that?"

"I don't know it's just a thought”.

"Well, he is the king we are going to have, so let's pray that in a couple of years he will have the ability to reign”.

She takes his hand and with her fingers follows the path of the lines on his palm “I think he shouldn't be the next king. I think it should be you”. She looks up “Or maybe a queen”. She lowers her eyes again and continues to look at his hand.

For some reason the last words of his sister do not stop spinning in his head during all the time they spend together and when he goes to leave her in her class with the maester and sees Jon next to her he looks at them both. Dany was right, while she talks animatedly, Jon doesn't say more than a few words to her. And he thinks that if he were someone who doesn't know them, someone strange and they told him just by pointing to both children that one of them is the next monarch of Kings Landing, he would think that they mean Daenerys and not Jon.

Maybe it's his preference for his sister that makes him come to that conclusion or the contempt he has for Lyanna and Rhaegar or that Jon seems more like a Stark than a Targaryen, he really doesn't know.

If his father were alive, he probably would have married him to Daenerys and proclaimed him his successor. But that's the past, that past that Viserys sometimes longs for just to see his mother one more time or even to see his brother as he used to, with admiring eyes. He knew little about Elia and the children because of his father but he would have liked to meet them, to be that family that Daenerys talks about.

But now it's too late for that, and even though he promised Dany he would give it a try, he is looking forward to the day when he can move to Dragonstone.

After saying goodbye Viserys goes to the stable in search of a horse, his sister's gift awaits him at the port.

He's sure his sister will faint, this time for real, when she sees what he bought her.

…..

"It's a pleasure doing business with you”. Jaenara extends her hand to shake it.

"I hope it's a fruitful business for both of us”. He says shaking her hand.

The corner of Jaenara's mouth rises in a crooked smile. "I'm sure it will be”.

Rhaegar lets go of her hand like she's burning him, which makes her look at him amused. The reality is that it feels like Jaenara is a wildfire and whenever he is near her she envelops him in her flames and one way or another they always end up fighting each other.

"If you'll excuse me, Lady Janeara, I have a lot of business to attend to”.

"Of course your grace”. She walks to the door, elegant in her aqua green silk dress. It's a rare color in Westeros, but no less beautiful for that. Her figure stops at the door looking at him over her shoulder "Imagine what any lord would pay to live here in the Red Keep, practically being a king”.

"A kingdom cannot have two kings my lady”.

The blue of her eyes looks like the color of the deep sea and her teeth look like sparkling pearls that adorn her smile “Exactly. You better hurry up”. She brings her hand to her face to tuck a hair that has slipped out of her hairstyle behind her ear, even though her blonde hair is short, her ladies-in-waiting do wonders with it.

She closes the door to the room where they met to sign the contract and Rhaegar falls into the chair and puts his hands on his face.

"Bad day?" Lyanna's sweet voice brings him out of his thoughts. He feels her put her hand on his shoulder.

"No, in fact, we recently signed the contract with Jaenara”. He puts his hand on hers and kisses her. "I want to trust that everything will work out”.

"I'm sure it will”. She brings her face close to his and kisses his cheek. "Rhaegar, there is something I want to talk to you about”. She says walking to the seat Jaenara occupied just a few seconds ago.

Lyanna looks at their clasped hands on the table and takes a deep breath before speaking. "I made a mistake many years ago and I think it is time for you to know the truth”. She looks up "Because honesty is important in a marriage”. She gulped.

"Lyanna….what are you talking about?"

"The reason I was worried in the morning when you told me about Oberyn Martell….is because when you left my side to fight the battle of the Trident I asked Arthur if he could…” The muscles of his wife's face seem tense, as if she is struggling to get the words out of her mouth.

"If he could….what?" He rushes her.

"I asked him if he could talk to the prince so that he would meet me to talk”.

"What!" He gets up so fast the chair falls to the floor. Rage quickened Rhaegar’s blood.

"Please listen”. She pleads with her eyes "Rhaegar just listen to my explanation”. She takes his hand trying to appease his anger.

Rhaegar nods but stands there looking at her. “If I had understood the world as I do now, I assure you that I would not have made that decision. From the first moment I knew that once we got to Kings Landing things would be different. You wouldn't leave Elia and take me as your second wife”. Her eyes sadden for a second "I knew this could be seen as an offense to Dorne, I imagined the worst, I imagined that they could attack you or our son…I just wanted him to understand the situation and reconcile the families”. Now the tears fall free from her face and painful sobs escape her mouth "I'm sorry…..I just wanted our family to be able to find peace and…”

"Lyanna…." He kneels next to her and wipes her cheek. "I know you meant well honey, but it would have been dangerous….I don't understand how Arthur agreed with that”.

"He did it but only if he was present….he also thought it was dangerous, but you know how stubborn I am”.

He smiles at her comment "I know". Rhaegar with both hands takes her face and with his thumbs tries to wipe her tears “It was a long time ago….it doesn't matter anymore. It just made me think that something could have happened to you both so for a moment I was angry but I'm glad that you were honest with me”. Lyanna seems even more emotional hearing that and hugs him tight.

As Lyanna hugs him, she thinks about how she just told her husband a big lie when the truth of her intention to the meeting with Oberyn was to explain that his family were not really dead and make him see that it would be better for everyone if once they got to Dorne, the rest of the kingdom thought Elia and the children were dead. That way, everyone could live peacefully and happily with the people they loved.

Over the years, Lyanna realized all the flaws in her plan, how naive she was in her every thought. Oberyn would never have accepted something like that, that would have been like insulting his sister even more.

Surely he would have called her a series of insults if that encounter had taken place.

…..

Jaenara vividly remembers her 10th birthday in Dorne.

The why?

Oberyn took her to a bee-hive that morning because he wanted to give his older sister the tastiest honey she had ever tasted. As a result at least twenty bees stung her face. She looked like a walking raspberry.

Her mother was so angry with the two of them that she chased them all over Sunspear scolding them with all kinds of insults, the truth is that she does not remember hearing her mother as angry as that day. After getting tired of scolding them, she took Elia to the maester to try to fix her face, but the truth is that the maester told her that at least that day there was nothing to do and that surely the next day she would wake up much better. She just had to wait for the bites to deflate. She just had to wait for her swollen face to deflate with the days.

And that's how Jaenara spent her tenth birthday surrounded by horrified guests asking her what had happened to her. Of course, her brother Oberyn thought it was much more interesting to make up a different story for everyone. So each person at Sunspear had a different version of their situation.

How she misses Oberyn on a day like today, although it is not her true birthday, it is the date that together with Larra and Lysandro they chose to celebrate her arrival in their lives.

Jaenara opens her eyes on the bed and looking up at the ceiling whispers "Happy birthday to me”.


	11. First Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello dear readers :) 
> 
> I only have one thing to say: No lie can remain hidden forever......
> 
> Dress that Jaenara is wearing on her birthday.  
> www.iulover.com/products/red-hollow-out-lace-spaghetti-strap-maxi-bandage-dress

"Thank you, your grace….thank you very much”. The woman kneels and kisses his hand in gratitude for the gold coins that Rhaegar gave her after she told him about the financial problems that her family is going through. When the woman leaves, he and Jaime Lannister continue walking through the city.

“Lately I have thought a lot about the layout of the city. Every day there are more inhabitants and the number of buildings is being very limited for the number of people who live here. I think that should be one of the priorities for next year”. Rhaegar says crossing the sea of people walking the streets.

"It would be a plan for many years”.

"I know. Like most constructions or modifications in the city, the King who designs them hardly ever sees the complete work. But it would be a great relief for the families”.

"It's a-" Jaime can't finish the sentence because he sees a familiar face pass by. "Elena?"

The black-haired girl recognizes his voice and stops. "Ser Jaime?"

He kneels in front of her, under the gaze of a curious Rhaegar "What are you doing wandering alone again, little cupcake?" He ruffles her hair with his hand and the girl laughs "I thought you learned your lesson the time we met you with Lady Jaenara”. Elena holds a doll that looks quite old in her arms.

"I was buying a fig for my brother who will be on his birthday soon”. She takes out of her pocket a small fig that in his opinion is not even in such good condition "Shhh, it's a secret". She whispers putting it back on.

Rhaegar also kneels in front of the girl in order to greet her and at that moment he realizes that she is blind. "Are you not going to introduce me to Lady Elena, Jaime?" The curious girl turns her head in the direction of his voice.

"I don't know if you have earned the right to meet the beautiful Lady Elena, Rhaegar" Jaime smirks.

The girl makes a sound of surprise upon hearing his name, the only person with that name is the King. "Your grace". She says shyly, holding her doll tightly.

The King takes Elena's hand in his and says "You can call me Rhaegar”. Elena slowly brings her hand to Rhaegar's face so that she can get to know his features. Her touch is firm but sweet, her fingers are curious, they run over every corner of his face. Rhaegar for a second remembers Rhaenys and inhales deeply closing his eyes. When she withdraws her hand, a feeling of emptiness floods him. But as quickly as that feeling comes, it disappears and is replaced by guilt, his faithful companion all these years. If he had never left, Rhaenys would still be here and it wouldn't be just a memory.

"And your brother?" Jaime interrupts his thoughts.

"He's buying some fabrics”.

Jaime gets up and looks around but cannot see him "I don't see him, but we can look for him together”.

She shakes her head "He said we meet in this place".

"We can wait with you then”. Says the King.

She smiles brightly and nods "Does your brother really like figs Elena?"

"Yeah…your….Rhaegar….We always buys him one with my mom for his birthday”. It is for this reason that Rhaegar likes to walk the streets of Kings Landing on any given day, he can meet the real needs of the people who live here.

In the castle, he can eat all the figs he wants, while Elena can only buy one for her brother on his birthday. The merchants must sell them at an exorbitant price since they always bring little quantity and it is a long journey from Dorne to Kings Landing, by the time they arrive here they are almost in poor condition but there are still people willing to buy them. "And when is your brother's birthday, little beauty?"

The girl blushes at the compliment "Tomorrow".

"And how about if instead of one we give your brother a box full of figs”.

"A box!" She says surprised.

She has a smile on her face that would be able to warm the heart of the coldest man. "Yes, a box, in the Red Keep we have many figs so I will send Ser Jaime to your house tomorrow with a box full of the most beautiful and juicy figs in my greenhouse”.

Elena jumps up and screams so loud that the scarf around her neck falls to the ground. Rhaegar's eyes widen when he looks at the necklace the girl wears around her neck. He would recognize that necklace anywhere. This is undoubtedly the necklace that Oberyn gave Elia on her wedding day.

"Elena…where did you get this beautiful necklace?" Jaime who was still standing next to them looks at Elena's necklace and also recognizes it.

The girl, still smiling, touches the jewel with her hand "With my brother we were picking fruits in the forest and we found it”.

"What forest?" His tone of voice comes out harsher than he intended and the girl loses her smile.

"We….we didn't steal it”. She seems a bit scared because she is hugging her doll tightly again, as if it were her shield against the world.

“No….no….it's not that…forgive me…only it would help me a lot if you tell me where you found it”.

“Mmm…..my brother can tell you where. It's yours?” Rhaegar is speechless. Is it his? Not really, it belonged to his wife, but that doesn't make him the owner of the necklace. Rhaegar never owned anything, not even her love.

“No Elena, it is not from the King but it belonged to the previous Queen. His wife Elia Martell”. The King looks at Jaime grateful for answering.

"Elena!" The three of them hear a boy call her. When Rhaegar looks up, he sees a slim young man with black hair and dark eyes coming to her side.

"Your grace”. He bows. "Ser Jaime". Elena takes her brother's hand and hides a little behind him.

Jaime shakes the boy's hand “Hello, Tomas. We wonder if you can help us”.

…..

"We were picking fruit and some nuts on this trail when I saw something glow”. When they explained the situation to Tomas, he agreed to help them immediately and, taking his sister's hand, led them into the forest. "When I got closer I saw that it was a very pretty necklace but it didn't seem expensive, so I gave it to Elena”. The necklace Oberyn gave Elia is small and does not have high-value gold jewelry. But it is very significant because Elia told him that this jewel is at least two hundred years old in the Martell family.

They have been walking for a long time, so now Jaime is carrying Elena asleep in his arms.

“Here, your grace. In this tree, do you notice the roots peeking out?” Tomas kneels on the ground and points to the exact spot. "I found it tangled between these roots”.

"Are you sure it was here?" Says the King, somewhat confused.

Tomas nods his head “Yes, I know this forest very well; I have been coming for years. I could tell you by heart all the trees that exist in the forest”.

Rhaegar exchanges a look with Jaime and knows that he thinks the same. The place where the boy found the necklace is a long way from where Elia was found that fateful day.

“Rhaegar ten years have passed, the wind, the rain, many factors may have affected the ground and the necklace may have passed through different places”.

"And why wasn't she using it”. Rhaegar leans down and examines the root of the tree with his hands. "This tree must be at least two hundred years old, so its root size is almost the same as ten years ago”. Among the roots, besides the insects, he cannot see anything else.

“Who would want to steal a necklace like that? It only had meaning to the Martells, if you take it to the black market to sell it; they won't even give you a gold dragon coin for it”.

“Maybe that's why they left it. When they realized that it was worth nothing”. Jaime whispers, accommodating Elena in his arms.

Rhaegar rises from the damp earth and wipes his hands on his breeches. “Let's take Tomas and Elena home. I have something to show you".

…..

When they took the children back home, Elena asked Rhaegar if he wanted the necklace back, but he declined the offer. Elena deserves the necklace more than he does. Before saying goodbye, he whispered in the little girl's ear that in the morning he would send Ser Jaime or one of the knights with a box of figs for his brother. She hugged him with her little arms and kissed his cheek in gratitude.

“Are we going to plant flowers?" Rhaegar ignores Jaime's comment and opens the greenhouse door.

Jaime whistle. "This place…is…it is very…has many…figs”. Besides Dany who sneaks into the greenhouse, anyone else is prohibited from entering. Lyanna once asked if she could see inside and upon hearing her husband's refusal, she tried to force the door open at night.

The discussion that they had that time lasted at least a month.

"This way Jaime”. He pushes aside a cabinet where he has garden supplies and some personal items.

Jaime frowns when he sees the floor hatch "If you're going to murder me, my last wish is for you to tell my father that he can go fuck himself”. He says going down the stairs.

Rhaegar follows Jaime, it's a small floor hatch just the right size for one person to pass by at a time.

"What the…." Jaime is amazed to see a wall full of inscriptions of what appears to be what happened the day of the battle of the Trident. He walks slowly towards the wall and up close you can see that there are lines drawn everywhere, written words and numbers.

"It's a chronology ... of everything that happened that day, the things that I managed to find out…I have been trying to piece together all the events that occurred that day, but as you can see there are many unsolved questions”.

"And….does anyone knows about this?" The name of Elia and the children is often written with question marks.

"No. I didn't know who to trust when I started….it was like four months after….that day”. Rhaegar walks to stand next to Jaime and his shoulders sag as he exhales. “At least in five years I have not had anything new. Until now”. Rhaegar takes the quill that is on the table by the wall and with his slightly shaking hand he writes on it the information he managed to find out today.

Jaime turns his head to look at him, his green eyes looking at him curiously as he takes a deep breath. He seems nervous and sad, though Rhaegar doesn't understand why "It's hard….to carry the blame over the years when you know that what you did in the past caused so much damage to the people you love”. He looks at the wall and runs his hand along the lines. "My father is a good strategist, he knows how to lead and he tried to make his children that way" He laughs disappointed "I think at one point I felt that….No…I needed his approval and that's why I made a serious mistake, for which I still pay" Rhaegar is not sure of the mistake he is referring to, but thinks he knows the person he hurt. “I lied to my brother…I told him a big lie that ended in tragedy. I didn't want to lose him and I didn't tell him the truth for many years”. Jaime wipes a tear from his face "But it was Elia who convinced me that a relationship based on lies was not true”. Jaime looks back at Rhaegar but his hand remains on the wall now fisted. “It's my fault the person Tyrion loved suffered a lot and he hasn't forgiven me but Elia was right. It was necessary for him to know the truth”.

"She always had the right advice...she was very wise…”

"Yes, she was." He takes his hand off the wall and runs it through his hair in frustration. “What I mean by this is that I understand guilt and the need to do the right thing. Don't get me wrong, our stories are very different and I don't justify what you did and everything it triggered, but I understand what you're trying to do, so tell me everything you've managed to figure out and maybe I can help you with something”.

"Alright". Rhaegar tries to clear his mind of what Jaime just told him and walks towards the beginning of the wall. “My father locked Elia and my children in the room of Maegor's Holdfast, he ordered the door to be locked, which is why there was absolutely no one in that corridor and all the soldiers had orders to guard the Keep. That day Elia must have noticed that something was wrong and she thought about leaving the room through the same passage that you entered. It was the logical choice”. He moves to where he has several numbers written and places his hand on the first one. “These numbers represent the amount of time it took me to cross that same passage every time. I always do it at a different speed but I count the numbers in my head in the same way”.

"And how many times have you done that?" Asks the young knight.

"Sixty-two". Jaime raises both eyebrows. “I needed to do it at a lot of different speeds to be able to relate it to the different events that were happening that day. I found something the first time I decided to go up”.

Rhaegar drags a trunk from the corner. It is dusty on the outside but looks like the inside has been cleaned recently. "When I opened the ceiling hatch, this fell to the ground”.

Jaime takes the fabric that Rhaegar gives him in his hands. "It looks like…the fabric of a dress”.

“It is the fabric of a dress. It was from Elia because one of her pins was caught in the fabric”. He goes back to the wall and indicates a sector that apparently is about the dress. “That day Elia was wearing a dress when we found her that I did not recognize but I am sure that her skirt, although it was a bit torn, does not match the amount of fabric you are holding. _That_ is practically a full skirt”.

"But she could have left the fabric of another dress”.

Rhaegar agrees “It's what I thought at first, but none of the dresses in her closet matched the fabric. Also, I had never seen the dress she was wearing when we found her. I asked everyone….the maid who worked for her at that time; they confirmed that Elia did not buy any dresses in the time that I was not here”.

“She could barely get out. In the middle of a war, nobody would think of buying dresses”. Jaime examines the fabric again, and as the King says, it is almost a full skirt. "Did you find anything else?"

"Yes. I found some kind of wooden stick that I think she used to move the object she put on the floor to get to the hatch”.

Jaime remembers what he used “A wooden box. Baelor was sitting in that box when I arrived, so that's why I imagined that they had gone through the passage”.

"A wooden box" Rhaegar snaps his fingers and takes the quill to write that on the wall. "Right…so they went upstairs with the help of the wooden box and once at the top she pushed it to the side with the wooden stick so that no one would notice where the hatch was located”. Rhaegar sighs "So then they must have come to my room and what we already know happened. I don't know when Jon found them but I think it was after that, I think he only found Elia when Rhaenys and Aegon already…couldn't be saved”.

"And why do you think that? He may have met them in a corridor or even been with them in your room”.

The King shakes his head “No. because he had a wound in the abdomen that the maester assured me was prior to the one that killed him. He told me that Jon must have walked bleeding for a long time”. Rhaegar goes back to the numbers "I think the longest time it takes me to cross the passage is the time it took Elia and the children to get to my room because…" He looks at Jaime somewhat embarrassed "Don't judge me but I took Jon when he was three years old and made him cross the entire passage with me”.

"I wonder what your wife would do if she knew that”.

"She probably kills me, but I needed something real and the only way to do it was with a three-year-old”. He denies with the head. "Going back to Jon, he knew the Red Keep just like we do, so he knew how to get in and out without being seen, but somehow he came across the people involved in Elia's death or perhaps Robert's allies. That kind of wound must have knocked him unconscious for a while, and thinking about how long it took to get from the Trident to the Red Keep and how long it might have taken to search for Elia, the times don't match”.

"I still think your theory is a bit….very speculative”. Jaime leaves the fabric of the dress in the trunk and when he closes it he sits on it.

“Yes I know but I also think that if everyone had been in my room Jon would have at least been able to murder one person. He would have defended my family like he did in the forest with Elia, but only my children were there and the blood that was there was only theirs. He was injured, it was impossible that there was no blood in other places or at least a sign of a fight between Jon and whoever did this”.

"Mmm….you may be right”. Jaime looks at the wall and points to the part where the word _forest_ is written "And what do you think happened there?"

“I think whoever did this wanted to kidnap Elia, just her. But there is also something here that does not make sense either. If they wanted to kidnap her, I suppose they needed her alive, why would she be dead before Jon? It doesn't make sense, they just would have left her in the room with the children…why take her to the forest to assassinate her there, _that_ from every point of view is very risky”.

"Maybe they were kidnapping her, at that moment Jon found them and they decided it was too risky to take her and they decided to change the plan”.

“But she died long before Jon. Another piece of information confirmed by the maester, he explained to me that if she had died in the forest, her injuries would have been different, even the way her body…” Rhaegar struggled to get the words out of his mouth “the way her body decomposed…hers was much more decomposed than Jon's…the maester…he wasn't sure, because it didn't make sense; but he believed that she could have been dead a day before him”.

"A day before?...impossible, I saw her a day before, and it's impossible for Rhaenys and Aegon to get to your room alone….that definitely doesn't make any sense”.

“It's the same as I thought and the maester just said it was his opinion, but he knew it was almost impossible; so he said that maybe there could be something in Elia's body that would make her decompose faster. Although in his own explanation he did not sound very convinced”.

Jaime looks at a kind of drawing that is in the part of the _forest_ on the wall "What is that?" Says pointing at it.

"It's….I don't really know if it's correct or not, but it's kind of a drawing that the man who was with Elia and Jon had on the skin of his finger”.

Jaime quickly gets up from the trunk and walks towards the drawing “Drawing? Are you sure?”

"Yes. It was as if it had been imprinted on his skin or something like that" Jaime continues examining the drawing carefully "What ?....Have you seen that before ?" Says the king, nervous.

"No, but I know what you mean. Elia told me about it once, it's an old tradition in Dorne and some cities in Essos….in the past, brides made drawings on their bodies with a kind of ink they took from a plant or flower, I'm not sure….but they did it on the day of their wedding and it lasted a couple of days. Over the years they stopped performing the ritual because they realized that the merchants and mercenaries had taken it and modified it to make drawings that had nothing to do with the initial idea and it seemed to them that the tradition was less honorable…or something like that. First they broke the skin with a knife, drawing what they wanted and then applying the ink, making the drawing last much longer”.

Rhaegar looks at the drawing again, it is a kind of sword wrapped in a snake. "So the people who killed my family were from Essos or...Dorne?" Everyone loved Elia in her land why would they want to kill her. "I've always thought of Robert as my first suspect all these years, but if what you say is true, then...maybe I was wrong”. Rhaegar touches the part of the wall where Robert's name is written along with all the theories he had, it all seems so wrong now.

"Or maybe it was Robert and he hired these outsiders so we wouldn't suspect him...in case we caught them”.

“It may be, but who would help him?...a trip to Dorne or Essos, in the middle of a war, is too long to send someone to hire mercenaries or any man in general. I am also sure that in Dorne, House Baratheon has no allies”.

"Maybe the mercenaries were already here....they usually travel a lot”. Jaime takes the quill from Rhaegar "May I?" He says pointing to the wall. Rhaegar nods and watches as the young Lannister begins to write on it. "Now we know that at least the man who died that day in the forest is from Dorne or Essos ... Someone must have hired him...or them”.

"Definitely _them_ ”. Rhaegar interrupts.

"Now the question is”. Jaime writes "Who?" in the middle of the wall, enclosing the word in a large circle. He hands the quill to Rhaegar.

_Who._

…..

"My lady...you look beautiful" Ihrra helped her get dressed this morning. Jaenara chose a long-sleeved dress, made of black sheer fabric printed with small blue and pink flowers and under this fabric she wears another thin black silk dress, otherwise her dress would be very revealing.

"Thank you Ihrra”. Jaenara smiles at her lady-in-waiting and looking at her in the mirror says. "What do you think of Ezzara?"

These last few days, Lyanna's spy has been pretty quiet and seems a bit worried every time Jaenara talks to her. She seems to be waiting for the moment when she says something to her. "You always look beautiful my lady”. Ezzara says bowing.

Ihrra didn't do anything special with her hair today, but she made a kind of tiara with little flowers and put it over her hair in such a way that it looks like a crown. She painted her lids with a gold ink, which makes her blue eyes stand out even more against her olive skin, and applied a black liquid to her lashes that makes them look fuller than they are. Jaenara will miss Ihrra when her time at Kings Landing is up. Lately she has been thinking about telling her father if they can hire Ihrra in Essos, she feels that once it is all over, they might even be friends. The first Jaenara would have.

But not Elia's first friend, she treasures it in her heart the time Ashara spent with her at Kings Landing. She had to make a difficult decision to convince her that she should return to Dorne for the sake of her baby, but it was the right thing to do.

Aerys would have murdered her and Ser Barristan if he found out that they were both in love and expecting a child. Or at least he would have punished them and Jaenara doesn't even want to think about the horrible things Aerys could have done.

"My lady?"

"Yes Ihrra?"

The young Essosi blushes and takes a small package out of her dress pocket. "When Lady Larra hired us, she told us the date that your birthday would be….I bought you this, it's not much but…” Jaenara takes the small package and when she opens it there is a small bottle inside. "It is a water that they sell in the market...it has different essences...they say that you should put a few drops on your wrists to have good luck”.

Jaenara examines the little bottle and can't help crying.

"I know that my lady doesn't believe in good luck and stuff…" Ihrra says hastily.

"Thank you”. Jaenara puts her hand on Ihrra and her face crumples "It's perfect...I'll use it every day”. Jaenara voice ragged.

Besides her parents, no one had given her anything in years.

_"Don't open your eyes”. Rhaegar takes Elia by the hands, walking slowly towards the place where his gift awaits her._

_“I have them closed. I promise”. Elia says for the eighth time. This is Elia's first birthday away from Dorne and her husband told her last night that he would put his duties aside to spend the day together._

_He laughs “I'm sorry…I'm sorry. I just want it to be a surprise”._

_"It's alright". Elia is sorry to tell him that she already knows what his gift is. Yesterday afternoon she was walking along the path near the stable in Dragonstone and saw a beautiful black mare arrive. Unfortunately for Rhaegar, the men who were feeding her were talking about the mare, about how she was a gift from the prince to the princess for her birthday._

_"Well now you can open them”. It takes a few seconds for Elia's eyes to adjust to the light, but once she does, she sees the beautiful mare in front of her. "Happy Birthday”. Rhaegar says in her ear._

_"She is a beautiful mare". She brings her hand slowly to the animal to caress it, it is soft like cotton._ _“I never had a horse of my own in Dorne. My mother believed that I was very delicate to ride”. The mare has black eyes like two ravens that look at her curiously._

_Rhaegar hugs her from behind putting his hands on her waist, wrapping her around his body, leaving no space between them._ _"Allow me to differ from your mother. I believe that the future queen of the seven kingdoms deserves a horse as majestic as she is." He hides his face in her hair nuzzling against her neck. "Elia?"_

_"Mmmm”. The princess says caressing the mare with one hand and with the other the hand that her husband has on her waist._

_"How did you immediately know it was a mare?"_

_"I…"_

_"You?..." He holds her closer to his body, causing Elia to make a small moan in response "...were you spying on your gift...my wife?" Rhaegar's lips feel warm on her neck, a welcome contrast to the chilly autumn air in Dragonstone, though the truth is, even summer feels like winter here._

A knock on the door brings her out of her memories making her tremble. Jaenara notices that she still has Ihrra's hand in hers and the woman looks at her curiously because she is practically strangling her hand.

"I'm sorry". Jaenara whispers releasing her hand. Ihrra just smiles at her and starts tidying the room.

"My lady...Ser Jaime is here”. Ezzara says.

Jaenara awaited the moment when the young Lannister would come to visit her. By this time he must know that the marriage with his father will be a fact. She only has to receive the letter from Larra and Lysandro where they give their consent. Not because Jaenara needs it, but because the custom in Westeros if the parents are not present is that they must at least write a document with their consent. An absurd law according to Jaenara for someone her age but that at least gives her time to be prepared for the moment when she must make her engagement public.

"Ser Jaime". Jaenara walks towards the young man.

"Lady Jaenara" He bows gallantly and reveals a bouquet of flowers that he had hidden behind him. "For you".

"And on what occasion?" She takes the flowers in her hands and smells the aroma of the bouquet smiling.

"Oh, you know...just a little present for my future… _mommy_ ”. He said with a bashful smile.

The smile fades from Jaenara's face and she looks at him with emotionless eyes. "Leave us." When both women walk out the door she knows that Ezzara will go to Lyanna to tell her what she just heard. It seems that their engagement will not be as secret as she thought.

"I assume Lord Tywin has already informed you of our engagement”.

Jaime walks to the bed and sits on it as if it were his room and not hers. "My father informed Cersei, Tyrion, and me of...their happy union”.

"It seems to me that you are not very happy that we have decided to get married”. Jaenara takes out some dried flowers from a vase and replaces them with the ones Jaime brought.

“I will be honest with you, my lady. My father has loved one and only one woman in his entire life”.

She laughs “If it is love that worries you…I am not in love with Lord Tywin or I hope to be in the future. This is a strictly political movement”.

"I know. That's what worries me”. He gets out of bed and stands next to her looking at the flowers. "I'm not stupid, I know that my father is in a difficult economic situation…as I see it, only he benefits from this union, which makes me think that-" Jaime looks her in the eyes "You two are up to something...and it's nothing good”.

"And what are we up to according to you?" He once heard Lord Tywin call Jaime the stupidest of the Lannisters. How much falsehood there was in those words. Jaenara got to know another side of Jaime when she visited her and the children in Maegor’s Holdfast.

He is not stupid. He is an observer.

"I do not know yet”.

"Jaime…I would like to spend the whole morning explaining to you why this marriage is important to me....politically speaking..." She pretends to be arranging her things on the dresser “But it would bore you. The only thing you should know is that your father made me this proposal and I thought a lot about accepting. But I think it's the right thing to do, it's not that at my age I have as many proposals and even less from a great House like the Lannister”.

The young man doesn't seem convinced when Jaenara looks at him. He puts his hand on her arm stopping the frantic way she was ordering her jewelry. "I'm sure you know that my father is not a man to trust, he always bets on the winning side and it doesn't matter if he has to crush his own children for it”. Jaenara remembers when Jaime told her what he did to his brother Tyrion and his wife Tysha “I think you like to play with fire my lady… but my father is totally different. If he wants to burn you, he will do it until there is nothing left of you”.

“Thanks for the advice Ser Jaime but I made my decision and gave my word. I will be the future lady of Casterly Rock as soon as my parents approve the engagement”.

He nods and removes his hand from her arm. "As you say my lady”.

She tries to give her best smile "Don't worry, I understand you”.

…..

Her conversation with Jaime left her a bitter taste and proof of this is the little attention she has paid this morning at breakfast. Daenerys ended up frustrated with her because she didn't pay attention to what she was saying.

Which is true.

She notices that a soldier appears at the door and says something in the ear of the maid. It seems like something important because as soon as she hears it, her eyes widen and she quickly approaches the king to whisper in his ear.

Rhaegar, who had been pretty quiet all morning, pays close attention to what she says. He too seems surprised and his eyes go straight to Jaenara.

"I believe you have withheld important information from us this morning, my lady”.

"Uh ...excuse me?" Jaenara assumes it's her birthday, but something on Rhaegar's face makes her think that maybe it's other information. Her day only keeps getting worse.

"You never told us you would have visits from Essos”.

"What?". She has practically no family in Essos or friends. She really is very confused with the information.

“They inform me that a ship with an amphiptere arrived at the port. The only House I know with that coat of arms is your House my lady”.

Jaenara frowns in confusion, Rhaegar is right just as a three-headed dragon is the symbol of House Targaryen, the amphiptere is of House Rogare. Jaenara's eyes popped open when she remembers the letter her parents sent her a few days ago saying they would send her a birthday present.

She rises from her seat so fast that the sound of her chair is deafening. "Are you sure?". She asks the soldier at the entrance of the room.

"Yes my lady. I saw it with my own eyes”.

A smile appears on the young Rogare's face "Forgive my manners, but I have to go”. She doesn't wait for anyone's answer, she feels like she can't contain the excitement and adrenaline in her body. When she is in the hallway, he looks out one of the windows and sees horses arriving at the Red Keep. The Rogare coat of arms is everywhere.

She takes off her shoes and leaves them lying around, lifts her long dress with her hands and like a little girl, runs at full speed through the entire Red Keep until she reaches her destination. Jaenara pant for breath as she goes down all the stairs. The first thing her eyes see is Lysandro's long hair who seems to be talking to one of the men accompanying them.

"Father!" Lysandro turns around and his eyes are the second thing she sees.

"My sun”. He gets off his horse just in time to catch a Jaenara that came running into his arms. "You don't know how much I miss you. Happy birthday”. He says as he strokes her short hair and feels her cry on his neck.

"I can't believe it...but what about the Bank?"

"I left your uncle in charge while we traveled...don't worry, I instructed him in everything he needed to know in my absence”.

" _We traveled_?" She takes her face off his neck and looks at him, Lysandro wipes her tears with his thumbs "That means….”.

Lysandro smiles and kisses her forehead "Did you really think your mother would stay in Essos?"

Jaenara looks over Lysandro's shoulder and sees Larra's white mare a few meters behind. "Thank you..." She kisses her father's cheek and hugs him tightly "Thank you...I needed you here with me”.

"We will be stronger together”. He whispers in her ear. Jaenara makes a content sound and for the first time in weeks she feels some peace.

"Jaenara?" Larra is wearing breeches and Jaenara has a slight suspicion that, due to their size, they are from Lysandro.

"Mother!" The three hug each other through tears. "I need you to prepare the food that I love so much....there is nothing like it here”.

Larra laughs out loud "I'm glad you at least missed something about me”. Jaenara blushes and looks at her through tears, embarrassed.

"Lord Rogare”. Rhaegar's voice pulls them out of their bubble. Jaenara looks back over her shoulder and sees the king looking at them with a smile. His eyes meet hers and she is a bit ashamed of her actions, so she looks down and her blush becomes even more pronounced. He brought in his hands the shoes she left in the corridor.

"King Rhaegar Targaryen, I hope you have treated my daughter well the time she has been alone here”. The message is not lost on Rhaegar. Lysandro does not bow down or call him _your grace,_ his father makes it clear that while Rhaegar is the King of the Seven Kingdoms, he is not his King.

Jaenara loves him a little more now just for that.

"I hope she feels we have treated her well”.

She sniffles "Of course, your grace”.

"Your Grace?...I don't remember Rhaegar conquering Essos, my dear”. Lysandro grins but his eyes tell her that they will talk about it later.

"It's just a sign of respect father”. She unwraps from the arms of her parents "Well, you already know my father... " She takes Larra's arm "She is my mother, Larra Rogare".

“Lady Larra, it is a pleasure to meet you. I must say that lady Jaenara has told me a lot about you”.

"I hope she didn't just talk about my food”. She cradles Jaenara's face in her hand while the young heiress Rogare looks at her embarrassed by her earlier comment.

Rhaegar laugh. “The truth is that you are quite famous here for everything you taught Jaenara about archery. She is stunning with a bow in her hand”.

“When there are two huntresses in your house Rhaegar, that helps you think twice before making a mistake”. Lysandro interrupts with a laugh and hugging them both says “So the truth is that it's a bit surprising that everyone is so relaxed in this place. Do you have everything ready for the celebration?” He says looking around.

"Celebration?" Rhaegar looks at them, confused.

“Yes celebration. Today is my sun's birthday-"

"Father...there is no need-" whispers Jaenara.

"I told you Larra”. He looks at his wife rolling his eyes. "Jaenara is as predictable as a rain in winter”. Lysandro Rogare speaks in old Ghiscari to people who are behind and although Jaenara does not understand what he is saying, she is sure that her birthday will not go unnoticed as she expected. "We have a lot to do, dear wife”.

"Excuse me Lord Rogare, the truth is that no one had any idea that it was lady Jaenara's birthday but I will immediately order that we begin preparations for a celebration tonight”. Rhaegar talks to her father, but his eyes are fixed on Jaenara and, although she tries to read them, she cannot decipher what he is thinking.

Larra Rogare puts her hand on her husband's arm, avoiding his response. After so many years married to him, when she knows when he will respond with something that will generate conflict. “Thanks Rhaegar. I would like to be able to help if possible”.

"Of course my lady”. The King invites them to go to the Red Keep and orders some maids to prepare a room for the marriage and others for the people who accompany them.

"Your shoes, my lady”.

"It was not necessary for his grace to bring them to me, but thank you”. She puts her shoes on quickly.

"I think I have not made a good impression on your father, Lady Jaenara”. The king says as they both watch Lysandro and Larra organize the people who come with them.

"No one ever makes a good impression on him, your grace” She laughs. "To survive you have to see a potential enemy in everyone”. She gets serious and turns to see her ex-husband. "Do you know black widow spiders?"

"No..." He frowns at the abrupt change of subject.

“In Essos they are very famous. Females sometimes kill and eat their counterparts after mating”. Jaenara thinks of Lyanna Stark and how she tried to murder her with the Red Death. "Sometimes your enemy is not as far away as you think”. She leans close to his ear “It may even be a person you love”.

“Jaenara…please I need you to come and rescue me my sun. Your mother is driving me crazy”. Lysandro raises his arms exaggeratedly.

“If you'll excuse me, your grace…I have to go supervise my parents. I swear they act like twenty-year-olds sometimes”. She laughs.

Rhaegar nods and watches as Jaenara Rogare walks towards her parents. Her words still echoed in his mind. He has always thought that the person who murdered his family is outside the confines of Red Keep or at least belongs to one of the Houses that rebelled against the Targaryens.

But what if Jaenara is right in her words and sometimes your enemy is the person you least expect? What if the person in charge has been around him all these years?

At that moment Rhaegar turns his gaze towards the Red Keep and thinks that from now on he will start from scratch.

Now they are all possible suspects.

…..

Larra has remained silent while retouching Jaenara's hair. In the evening, his father and Rhaegar organized a small celebration which will be mainly attended by the lords and ladies who live in the Red Keep and a few knights. It is not a big event as his father wanted it, but it is the most he could do with so little time to organize it.

She changed her day dress for a red hollow out lace spaghetti strap maxi bandage dress. The red color of the dress is beautiful and it looks like it is on fire. It makes her feel powerful.

"What do you think honey?" Larra just added a little braid on the right side of her hair and I adorned it with some jewelry that women wear a lot at Essos. It's simple but she thinks it's perfect. The dress is the one that really catches the eye.

"I love it, mother. Thank you”. Jaenara puts her hand on Larra's, which rests on her shoulder. Her mother wears a gold dress that makes the perfect contrast to her dark skin and black hair.

"Tonight you will steal all glances" Through the mirror Jaenara sees that Larra smiles. She knows her mother is trying to cheer her up. She has not been able to talk to her parents as she would like because she is afraid that Lyanna's spies or someone else will listen to them, so they decided that it would be best to leave tomorrow with the excuse that they want to explore the city and that way they can talk in peace.

Jaenara has the slight suspicion that the letter she sent to Essos explaining her marriage to Tywin Lannister must have arrived when they were already on the ship. So she's also nervous because with her parents closer, Tywin will pressure her to do the wedding as soon as possible.

She thought she would have more time to adjust to the idea.

“I must steal the glances of others. I'm the birthday girl”. Jaenara tries to joke but she knows her mother recognizes her hesitation.

“I think I'm the lucky one tonight. The most beautiful women will accompany me”. Lysandro is standing in the doorway looking at them both.

"How long have you been there, father?" Jaenara says getting up from her seat and adjusting her dress.

"Long enough to realize that the ring you are wearing is not yours”. He says taking the hand that has the engagement ring that Tywin gave her and that she, to give the old lion peace of mind, has not taken off a single day since she used it for the first time. "Tomorrow" Lysandro tries to sound normal but she can hear curiosity in his voice and something else she believes is scolding.

Lysandro is very observant and an expert at reading people. He must intuit that the ring does not mean anything good.

"Tomorrow" Jaenara confirms.

…..

Entering the decorated The Grate Hall brings back memories of the past for Jaenara. Queen Rhaella was in charge of the decoration and from what her eyes see now, not much has changed in terms of aesthetics.

She thought Lyanna would bring a bit of the northern flair to the Keep, but if Jaenara thinks about it, the truth is that not much has changed.

"Lady Jaenara!" Jaenara looks in Daenerys direction and sees her running towards her in a beautiful white dress and a tiara in her hair. It is the first time she has seen the young princess with her silver hair totally down. "Happy birthday" The force with which Daenerys hugs her makes her stagger a bit.

"Thanks Princess" She looks up and sees that Dany's somewhat effusive scream makes everyone notice her arrival. Except for Rhaegar, who turns his back on her and appears to be chatting with Lyanna.

Jaenara introduces Dany to her parents and then receives good wishes from other guests. Her mother is immediately amazed at the princess and the two chat animatedly.

"Father, where is Ghael?...I haven't seen him in the Hall”. She feels Lysandro tense next to her, but when he responds, he does so normally.

“I think the Westeros weather affected him a bit. He had a slight fever and preferred to stay in his room”.

"What?...Why didn't you tell me I'm going to see him" She tries to walk towards the door but her father grabs her arm with more force preventing her from escaping.

“Jaenara, it's nothing serious, I promise. He wanted to stay in his room as a precaution, nothing more”.

Jaenara isn't very convinced, but she sees Rhaegar and Lyanna approaching them, so she tries to swallow her fear. "Your grace. Queen Lyanna”. She is about to bow when she feels his father's fingers pressing hard on her arm causing her to look at him strangely, Lysandro discreetly shakes his head.

"Lyanna Stark. I don't think we were introduced” says her father reaching out to kiss the queen's hand.

"It is a pleasure to meet you Lord Rogare”. She wears a purple dress with gold applications. "I hope everything is to your liking so far”. The queen says with some resentment. She must not have liked anything that they came as a surprise, and also having to prepare a celebration for the person who just a few days ago she tried to eliminate.

"It's not to my total liking, but it's a start”. Lysandro, ever since he arrived, has somehow tried to make it clear that who has the greatest power here is _him_ and not the Targaryens and that totally contradicts what he advised her to do before coming here. He was supposed to earn their trust, but he has done nothing but subtly insult them. Like now.

His change of strategy seems strange to her.

Lyanna just smiles, but Jaenara can see the tension in her face muscles. "Come on, my husband, we have other guests to greet”. Rhaegar nods.

“Lady Jaenara. My lord”. They both walk towards the knights and Jaenara thinks about how Rhaegar never once looked her in the eye. Almost as if he was avoiding her.

"I think I'm going to have a lot of fun in this place, dear”. Lysandro takes her arm again and guides her to where Larra and Daenerys are. She sees that now Viserys has joined them as well.

The rest of the night is quiet; more guests greet her, offer good wishes and discuss issues related to the bank and the alliance with the Targaryens. Although Jaenara sees Jaime during dinner, Tywin seems to be totally absent and that worries her. Although she prefers him not to be present so she can speak to her parents first, the Hand of the King should be here. First Ghael and now Tywin. Many strange absences tonight. On top of that, she is now sure that Rhaegar is avoiding her.

She does not like not knowing what is going on around her and at this moment she feels lost.

Her father brings her out of her thoughts by clinking his glass. "I'd like to propose a toast before the end of tonight”. All the guests remain silent and look at her father intently. "Being parents is a path that with my beloved wife we believed we would not cross in our lives”. He draws Larra to his side “We had accepted that we would be both against the world ....and we had made peace with our path. Just the two of us”. Jaenara always wondered why they had not had children until they told her about the tragic accident in which they lost their unborn child and that left Larra unable to conceive again. “So when Jaenara came into our lives it was an unexpected gift. It was like recovering a part of us that we did not know we had lost”. She looks at him with weepy eyes. “Jaenara has been the sun that has illuminated our lives all these years and I hope it continues to be so until the end of our days”. Lysandro raises his glass and everyone toasts with him.

"I love you both". She says hugging her parents. She will never tire of being grateful for what these people, two strangers at first, did for her and how much they still do.

"And we love _you_ ”.

…..

All night, until the celebration was over, Jaenara kept thinking about Ghael and how nervous her father would get when she asked about him. It may not be anything serious, but she wants to make sure everything is okay.

Even though Jaenara didn't want to celebrate her birthday in a place that brings back such bad memories, she must admit that the fact that her parents are here makes everything else unimportant. With them by her side, she feels stronger to face what the future holds at Kings Landing.

The corridor leading to Ghael's room is practically empty except for a few guards and servants wandering around. She is still wearing her red dress and the cold air makes her shiver.

Her scream stays in her throat when a person covers her mouth and drags her into a small space between some pillars. She tries to free herself from her attacker's grip without success, she tries to hit him with her fists but the gap is so small that their two bodies are almost glued to each other. Once her eyes have adjusted to the dark, she realizes that the person who has her trapped is Rhaegar. The king, like her, is dressed in the clothes he wore in the celebration.

"Shhh”. He whispers, breathing heavily and looking into her eyes, shaking his head.

Jaenara does not understand what is happening until she hears voices near where they are.

"And no one could give you an answer?"

“No Lyanna, but some people said that a few days ago they saw some strange men at the merchant's stall. Since that day no one has heard from him”.

“You better not go back there, it can be dangerous. The boy could not reach Jaenara's room with the insect so nothing happened…we cannot be blamed for anything”.

That's the last they both get to hear from where they are hiding. Rhaegar still has her mouth covered and she can feel the heat from his body due to how close they are. Although his eyes are not looking at her, he seems to be lost in his thoughts and what he just heard.

While Jaenara has just confirmed that Lyanna Stark sent the boy with the Red Death to her room, Rhaegar Targaryen has just realized that his wife was not as he thought.

Almost as if he had just met the real Lyanna for the first time.


	12. Pale Cream, Black, Green and Deep Blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -I think Oberyn and Brienne are a bit different in this chapter but their personalities are based on what happened to them in this fic.  
> -The final part of the chapter is told from Jaenara's point of view and in Chapter Thirteen we will see what happens at that very moment from Rhaegar's point of view.  
> -It is important for this chapter to remember that Ashara's daughter is named Elia.  
> -Harry Potter reference at the beginning of the chapter hahaha. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy the chapter :)

The taste of the bitter wine has become more pleasant as the hours pass; Rhaegar does not know how long he has been on the balcony of his room drinking. He only knows that doubt and mistrust has taken hold of him little by little, wrapping him in its claws. Not letting him think clearly.

Since the arrival of Jaenara Rogare many things have changed, including his marriage. He has tried to get things back to "normal" with his wife, but lately they have drifted apart in a different way than any other time in the past when they had problems with each other. At first he believed that it was his entire fault for having thoughts he should not about the young Rogare, he believed that once again he was repeating his past mistakes. The difference now was that he just needed to get away from her and nothing would happen. It is evident that Jaenara has no interest in him so once she returned to Essos everything would go back to the way it was before.

But now he doesn't know how things really were before.

Hearing Lyanna and Alarra talking in the hall changed everything, just a few hours earlier he would have put his hands on fire for his wife if someone had accused her of something as horrendous as trying to murder someone. He would have been sure that his sweet wife, that the mother of his son would never have thought of such a thing.

How wrong he was.

In these few hours that he has been looking at the stars from the balcony, he has analyzed so many moments of the past. He is not sure of anything. Now he questions every word. If she could come up with a plan to murder someone with the Red Death, then she could have done something like that in the past without him realizing it. But on the other hand he feels guilty for doubting her based on a single fact because they have lived together for years, should a single mistake be enough to doubt a person you love?

The problem is that it is not just a mistake. It's attempted murder.

Rhaegar takes the glass to his mouth and realizes that it is empty; it was the last drink of wine left in his room, so he stands up with difficulty from the floor trying not to fall since the wine has made him dizzy. Once he stands up, he advances leaning against the wall but before going to bed he looks towards the door that his room and Lyanna share.

He knows that if she decides to show up now, he will probably tell her things that he will regret in the morning, so he decides to go to the door and lock it. Everything is blurred and halfway there he falls to the ground. He decides that his best option at this point is to crawl towards the door, when he manages to reach it he closes the lock with the key. Satisfied with his work, he sits leaning against the door, closes his eyes, and lets the liquor drive him unconscious.

…..

"Rhaegar". He hears someone say his name but it seems to be far away, it is barely a whisper.

"Rhaegar!" Someone shakes him but he refuses to open his eyes and slaps the invisible person who tries to wake him up.

"You forced me”. It's the last thing he hears before he feels the cold water on his face. He gets up from the ground scared looking for his sword that he clearly does not have with him.

When his eyes focus, Arthur is in front of him with a ceramic jug in hand and is glaring at him. "I'm sorry but it was the only way. What are you doing sleeping there and drunk? You said that today we would go to look for the princess's gift and it is too late”.

"Shhhh I feel like my head is burning”. Growls the King.

"Please tell me that this drunkenness has nothing to do with..... _She who must not be named_ ”.

"If by _She who must not be named_ you mean Jaenara Rogare, you're right".

"Rhaegar, you promised not..." Arthur begins with a worried tone, but the King interrupts him.

"Lyanna was the one who tried to assassinate her with the Red Death”. Rhaegar frowns "You don't seem very surprised”. He comments when he sees his friend's face.

"I figured it was her”.

"And why didn't you tell me?" Rhaegar says looking for clothes to change into.

"Would you have believed me?" Arthur is right before hearing it with his own ears; he probably would have said he was wrong. "But how do you know?"

Rhaegar gestures for Arthur to follow him to the balcony and talk there. Somehow he felt unsafe in his own room. Once they are outside, he looks at Lyanna's balcony and when he sees no one he thinks how horrible it is to mistrust his own wife. "I promised to stay away from… _she who must not be named_ , and it's what I've been doing”. The king still unsure speaks almost in a whisper. “Yesterday when the celebration ended I asked Lyanna if she wanted to come to my room, I had something special planned. But she said she was tired of the whole organization, of Larra and Lysandro's visit, and she wanted to go to bed”. Rhaegar looks back at the other balcony. “It seemed strange to me because for the last few days she had insisted that we spend time alone. I don't know Arthur, I had an intuition and I followed it”.

"And what did you see?"

“I heard her speak with Alarra; she said that the boy had not fulfilled his mission so everything was fine. No one could blame them”. He directs his gaze towards Arthur “But the worst is that Jaenara Rogare was there. She heard everything”.

Arthur snorts "We're screwed”.

"More than screwed”.

"And what did she say?"

“I don't know… once Lyanna disappeared from the hall I was like in another world. I know Jaenara told me something, but I have no idea what it was. I just wanted to disappear”. He points back with his hand where the bottles and the glass are on the floor "And you can see how it all ended”.

They both remain silent lost in their own thoughts, trying to make sense of everything that happens. Trying to think what else the Queen has done in all these years.

"Is it possible to live with a person for years and not know them?" Rhaegar asks more for himself than his friend, but Arthur answers anyway.

"A bad beginning makes a bad ending, old friend”. He says putting his hand on his shoulder.

Perhaps life has finally decided to collect the debt that Rhaegar owes, all the deaths that weigh on his shoulder.

His marriage is falling apart, the kingdom depends on him being able to repay a loan in just seven months, his little sister whom he adores is more likely to leave his side, his brother hates him, he is starting to feel something for a woman who is not his wife.

It all started badly that day in Harrenhal.

Rhaegar doesn't know if he's ready for the end; whether this end is bad or not.

….

"No”.

"Father…"

"I. Said. No”. Lysandro silences her, his voice angry.

Jaenara continues walking along the shore of Blackwater Bay in silence with Larra and Lysandro. This morning, as agreed, they apologized for not having breakfast with the Targaryen family saying that she wanted her parents to get to know the city and that she wanted to spend time alone with them. Apparently Rhaegar was also absent this morning. She hopes they are not unlucky enough to meet the king.

Last night when they both heard Lyanna and Alarra talking, she tried to talk to Rhaegar, but it seemed to be in another world. What she doesn't really understand is that she was the one they tried to assassinate and Rhaegar looked as if he had discovered that his wife had wanted to poison him. He has no right to be offended or betrayed by his wife, after all, she is the wife he chose.

The wife who replaced her. The mother of his son, who still lives, not like her children, who are nothing but ashes under the land of Dorne. Jaenara sometimes wonders if Rhaegar felt pain after her and her children's departure, if what Ghael told her a few weeks ago is true and the king mourned her loss as Jaehaerys did with Alysanne. Rhaenys loved that story. Dragons and the rise to the throne of Jaehaerys Targaryen were her two favorite stories.

Jaenara herself must say that there is something beautiful about how Jaehaerys ran away with her sister to get married and together they faced everything for their love.

Maybe something like this happened to Lyanna and that is why she is willing to do anything for her husband, after all, Rhaegar ran away with her and faced everything for their love.

If their lives had been different and it was Lyanna who was married to Rhaegar and Elia had become his lover, would he have run away with her? Probably not. What is destined for tragedy always ends in tragedy, no matter how much we want to change it.

"Sweetie?".

"Mmm?" She looks at both parents somewhat confused.

"What are you thinking?" Larra takes her hand between hers. "We have been drawing your attention for a long time”. She says in that sweet voice she uses when she knows her daughter's mind is full of thoughts.

"I'm sorry". She looks down and sees how the dark sand sticks to her dress.

"Jaenara". She looks up at Lysandro. This morning while they were walking through Blackwater Bay she told them everything that happened at Kings Landing since she arrived. Everything was going well until she got to the part of her engagement. Although she explained to them about the rebellion and her reasons for accepting, her father did not take it well. His gaze is still furious when their eyes meet "Marrying Tywin is not your only option”.

“What other option do I have? If I don't, Oberyn won't trust me. He'll think I might be on Rhaegar's side”. She looks out to sea and mutters to herself “I need my brother to trust me”.

Lysandro cradles Jaenara's face between his two hands and makes her look at him. "You can tell him the truth. You can tell him that you are his sister. Jaenara years have passed, if you explain why you couldn't talk to him before, he will understand”.

"I cannot imagine…." She desperately shakes her head "He would hate me". She whispers.

“Of course not dear. I'm sure he will understand”.

"No. I don't even know who killed me and if that person is still waiting”.

"Waiting for what. You're dead"

"Exactly!. My brother has believed all these years I have been dead. I didn't contact him to protect him, Doran, everyone. But he'll wonder why I couldn't even send him a fucking note or travel to Dorne on some stupid pretext. Now I am Jaenara Rogare, I have the power to have done something”. Ocean waves hit the rocks hard, splashing salty drops on his face. “But sometimes I wonder if it was necessary to keep this secret from the people who loved me”.

"It was sweetie. It was all very confusing and dangerous years ago”. Her mother always uses the same gentle tone with her when she tries to make her see reason. “But now… your father is right, everyone thinks you are dead. Do you really think that if the people who murdered your children knew you were alive they would not have looked for you? With your father we have placed spies in all the Great Houses of Westeros and we can assure you that your name has not been named in years. Nobody remembers you or the children”.

This is what Elia Martell and her children have become nothing more than a forgotten memory, while the wound in her has never healed for the rest of the real healed as soon as another queen was crowned. "I know him. I can't do it”.

“Jaenara….”

“He's impulsive, pure-hearted. I can't risk getting caught because of one of his outbursts. I have worked many years to get where I am. I just have to keep up the charade a little longer. Once Rhaegar and Lyanna are right where I want them, I can talk to him, I can try to explain, but not before that”. She takes Larra and Lysandro's hand “I don't know if he will forgive me, but now I have to concentrate on what is important. I must marry Tywin Lannister, forge the alliance, join my brother, and do justice”.

Lysandro withdraws his hand from hers "I will not object to your crazy idea of getting married, but don't ask me to be there when you screw it up and it is too late to correct your mistake”. His father's words dig deep into her heart, but what hurts the most is when he turns and walks away from them.

“Give him time, honey. I promise I'll talk to him”. Larra kisses her on the cheek “Why don't we let him walk a bit along the seashore and we find something nice to give the princess tomorrow”.

Jaenara nods but her eyes are fixed on her father. In how he gets further and further away from her.

…..

"Look". Larra and Jaenara are at the stand of a jewelry seller. They have spent a long time looking for something special to give Daenerys for her birthday, but so far nothing has convinced the heiress Rogare. Everything seems so common to her eyes, or maybe it's just that sadness has completely clouded her. "I think it would look beautiful on her”.

"They are pretty”. The earrings are really beautiful, almost the same color as Daenerys eyes.

Larra sighs resignedly and tells the owner of the stall that she will buy the earrings. Once both women move among the people, Larra asks "You haven't told me how you felt”.

"How have I felt?" She says looking at a group of children running among the people.

"Yes. You told us everything that happened here, but not how you felt about the whole situation”.

"I..." she frowns and her eyes narrow. "I think every day is easier" she says vaguely.

"And how have things gone with the King?" They both know that they cannot speak freely in a crowded market. Anyone could hear them.

“Sometimes it surprises me that he doesn't realize who I am. Either I am a very good actress or he is too blind”. She whispers close to his ear pretending to adjust her mother's necklace.

"And that bothers you?". Her mother asks casually.

"It shouldn't bother me”.

"But…"

"But a part of me thinks I deserve more than that”. Wrinkles appear between her eyebrows. "Sometimes I want to rub in his face that it is me, that the weak woman he abandoned is about to control his entire life and that he will not be able to move a single muscle without my allowing it”. Her eyes flashes with cold ice and she's red with pent-up anger.

Larra remains silent until he responds, “I remember similar words. Your father told me similar ones when creating the Bank turned out to be the best idea we could have. He wanted to go to his father and _rub it in his face_ that although he disinherited him and did everything possible to separate us, now we were equal to or more powerful than him”. Her mother has a soft smile on her face. “I remember asking him what we got from that, if we would be happier or would we have a better life. He was silent but I knew that my words had awakened something in him”. Jaenara never knew how Lysandro's story with her father ended. "It turned out that your father was the only one of his siblings who cared for their father until his last days”.

"Do they forgive each other?"

"Mmhhh. They both realized that pride was what separated them. It took time for them to have a close relationship but once they understood that they were just different, they were inseparable. Even I have good memories with...your grandfather”. Jaenara does not remember her real grandfather or grandmother.

“I don't understand what you mean mother. Both situations are different, my father's and mine”.

"I know. Only you know what you need to heal. What I'm trying to tell you, my daughter, is that I hope you can eventually _heal_ because sometimes I feel like you see this journey as the last one and with your father we wish we had many more years of life with you” Larra takes Jaenara to a stall where they apparently sell antiques. “If your life is just this revenge, what will you do when it's all over? We all need a purpose, Jaenara”.

"I already told you mother, the day before I travel to Kings Landing, when it's all over I'll go back to Essos with you both and I'll live there until death takes me away from you”. It is a simple plan.

"Not if you marry Tywin." Larra replies.

Jaenara's muscles tense but her mother says nothing, Larra just gives her hand a squeeze and begins to examine the objects in the stall, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

Although Tywin promised her freedom in marriage, she does not believe that freedom means that she can live permanently in Essos. She will have to spend at least a couple of months at Casterly Rock. If the rebellion is successful, it may be that Tywin will once again the Hand of the new King, she is sure that he will not help Dorne for nothing, he has to gain something in exchange for his support. If that's the case, they would be apart for a long time anyway; they would be more of a marriage on paper than in reality.

The future may not be what she would have wanted, but if it is the price she has to pay to get what she wants, then so be it.

She may be lucky and Tywin could be one of the unfortunate deaths of the rebellion, though the more she thinks about it the less she thinks it's possible. He's too smart for that.

Something in the corner of the stall catches Jaenara's attention and when she gets closer she realizes that she has just found the perfect gift for Daenerys.

….

This is not the first time Oberyn has made a long journey across the sea, so the number of days it has taken them to reach Kings Landing has not been difficult for him. When you wait so many years to finally carry out your revenge, it transforms you into a patient man, a quality he did not have when his sister was still alive.

The last time the Prince of Dorne traveled to Kings Landing he did so with his sister Elia for her to marry the dragon prince. She seemed nervous and resigned to her fate, as much as he repeated that they could still escape, that she must not marry, Elia was determined to do her duty.

Something inside him always told him that it was a bad idea, that giving her to the dragons would end in tragedy, but in her first letters she spoke of a loving husband, of how they were building a friendship that she believed could turn into something more, so he wanted to believe that it was just jealousy, that it would no longer be just Elia and Oberyn against the world, not now that she would have a family of her own. He calmed down as he read each letter that came to Dorne; he looked forward to the visit of his sister and his niece, a visit that Elia promised in one of the last letters in which he read happiness. But that visit never materialized, and the loving husband Elia spoke of grew into a totally different man as the months passed when she was pregnant with Aegon.

He implored his mother to let him travel to Kings Landing when he found out about Harrenhal, but she was already too ill and told him she needed him there until Doran could adjust well to his new role as head of the Martell family.

Oberyn questions that decision over and over again. He would have preferred not to be present when his mother died; his sister and his nephews needed him more.

Elia's death impacted him to the core of his being; he left Dorne once she, her niece, and her nephew were buried. He traveled through much of Essos and Sothoryos taking with him the chaos that he held in his heart. He fought on every fighting pit he encountered, killed so many men that he does not remember the number, and had sex with all the women he wanted, but none of them managed to heal his soul. It only made the emptiness he felt greater. No matter how many fights he started or how many women treated him sweetly, nothing satisfied him.

He could never find that _something_ that was missing.

He returned to Dorne almost four years later thinking of visiting the grave of his sister and nephews first, but his feet led him another way.

The Tower of Joy.

He doesn't know why he was there; after all, it's been years since Rhaegar and his whore lived in that place and neither of them were of interest to him. He wandered around the place for hours, thinking about how they must have laughed at his sister, how they had conceived their bastard in that place, how they had lived happily while his sister suffered the pains of hell in Kings Landing. He sat in the middle of the room where the two bastards must have been fucking like rabbits and waited for something to happen, for the universe to somehow give him the answer on how to fill the void left by loss.

But he found nothing but hatred in that place. It wasn't until much later, almost a year after returning to Dorne, that he found the motivation he so eagerly sought.

"What are you doing here?" He says lying with his hands folded under his head without opening his eyes, he doesn't need to do it to know who the person is in his room.

Ashara sighs "The grudge doesn't suit you Oberyn, you get more wrinkles”.

He opens his eyes wide, glaring at her "I have no wrinkles”.

She laughs "Vanity is the only way to get your attention”. Ashara sits on the bed next to his feet and puts her hand on his ankle "Come on Oberyn”. She whispers.

He straightens up on the bed and sits next to Ashara "You shouldn't be here”.

"Why not? It's just a tourney…or not?” She says defiantly. Ashara has always been too smart.

“You know how dangerous Kings Landing is. You and I are not the favorites of the crown”. Fear pulsed through his veins; He couldn't bear if something happened to Ashara or Elia.

“Your eyes cannot lie to me. I promised Elia that I would take care of you and that is what I will do”. Her violet eyes are so beautiful when they shine with determination. Oberyn wonders what those eyes would be like, flooding with pleasure.

"I don't need a lady-in-waiting, Ashara”. He says mockingly.

She laughs a little “You're right, maybe a wet nurse would suit you better. With how much you love female breasts, maybe one of them would keep you busy so you don't do the stupid thing I'm sure you will do at Kings Landing”.

Oberyn turns gloomy again as he remembers the danger they are in. "What were you thinking”. He asks, meaning to sound angry but his voice sounds concerned.

"I already told you. I made a promise”.

“And I already told you that I don't need you to take care of me. You will return to Dorne immediately when we reach Kings Landing”.

She stands up and her fury sprang to life. "And who are you to tell me what to do?"

Oberyn also gets up and stands in front of her. "I am _your_ _prince_ and as such I can order you and Elia to return to Dorne!" Oberyn practically yells at her.

" _My prince_ is Doran and he is the only one who can tell me what to do!" She says with a flushed face.

"But when you need to talk to someone, I don't see that it's Doran you turn to”. He sees how her eyes fill with disappointment but his words flow from his poison-filled mouth. "If Doran is your prince, then you should fuck him, at least with him you wouldn't have to hide like with Selmy”.

Oberyn knows he went too far with his comment, but he has always found it difficult to deal with anger, frustration, and jealousy at the same time. He opens his mouth to apologize, but she raises her hand to stop his words.

"And you always ask me why I don't give you a chance”. Tears pool in her eyes. “You say you love me, but if we don't agree, you say things that hurt me. Yes, I had to hide with Ser Barristan in the past, but unlike you who fuck everything that moves, we loved each other. I came back to Dorne because my baby and I would be safe, we had a plan and you know it. You know it because I have told you everything about my life in Kings Landing, I have cried with you”. Tears are now running down her cheeks. "What would become of us if we were together and argued? I'll tell you what would happen; you would spend days in a brothel with a woman or a man or whatever, because sex is the only way you have to escape everything. It's your way to deal with your feelings, that or fight”.

“Ash-”

"No!" She yells "I'm not done”. She slaps Oberyn on his chest with her hand. “I may be a single mother and probably nobody will ever love me like Barristan did, but not for that reason am I going to be with a person who hurts me. I'm not going to teach my daughter that you should accept a person who doesn't respect you”. She begins to sob and hit his chest with her fists harder and harder. "You have no right to use my words against me; you know how much it still hurts".

“I'm an asshole…I'm sorry. I’m sorry”. He repeats over and over again letting her hit him until she can't do it anymore.

She walks backward looking at him with eyes swollen from crying "I'm going to stay at Kings Landing with my daughter because I know this trip is more than that stupid tourney and I told your sister that I would take care of you and _that_ promise is worth more than any threat that you can do to me. Unlike you, the words of a loved one _do_ mean something to me”.

Oberyn groans and punches the wall with his fist. Ashara shouldn't be here, not just because her life is in danger but because she's distracting him. At first he tried to seduce her because it is what he does, and she is a beautiful woman but over the years as they got to know each other better, now as adults and not children who played barefoot in the sand, he realized that she causes him to conflict with himself.

Feelings are for weak men, those were his words every time one of the women he was with wanted something more.

If that's true, Oberyn has become the _fool_ of the weak.

"I'm so screwed up”. He murmurs.

…..

Brienne can see Kings Landing from the ship, it's only a couple of hours to disembark and she's not sure she's ready. The emotion she felt since her father gave her Dark Sister has been slowly displaced by nervousness and fear. The court has changed a lot since Rhaegar is king because she is sure that if Aerys were still king he would have feasted on her. She has never been in court and even though her father now accepts and supports her, the insecure girl who lives inside her knows that the lords and ladies will laugh at her, maybe not to her face but among themselves they will comment on how unfortunate Tarth is, with a heir like her.

Brienne has learned over the years to put those kinds of comments aside, but that doesn't mean they don't hurt. She would lie if she said she never dreamed of a knight, one just for her, who can see more than her deformed face and her masculine body. But the first thing you see in a person is not her feelings, it is her face and that stops anyone before they can even meet her.

She has trained with her father every day, rain, thunder, unbearable heat, none of that matters, only the fact that she will compete in her first tourney, which she hopes will not be also the last, crossing swords with the great knights of the realm. It's those moments when she takes Dark Sister in her hands and trains until her father is exhausted that sparked her body alive, it's almost as if she and her sword were one. Every day she prays to the seven so that the King does not change his mind and wants the sword back.

"Stop thinking about it”. Lately her father has been an expert at sneaking out without her noticing.

"You don't know what I'm thinking father”.

"No, but I know you are too hard on yourself, my bluemoon”.

Brienne feels her throat tighten a bit, she may not have the appearance of a sweet maiden, but her feelings are that of one.

"Do you think someone...." her eyes fill with tears "Do you think someone could one day…see me?" She knows that her father will understand what she is trying to say, if anyone will ever be able to see the real Brienne and not what they think they see of her.

"I believe, my bluemoon, that for that to happen, you must see yourself first”. Her father wraps her in his arms "You are incredible with a sword in your hands, brag about that, many will laugh but I bet you that none of them would be able to defend the people who live with them or their vassals from an attack by pirates. And you wouldn't do it just out of duty; you would do it because you care about them, even if you don't know them”. She buries her face deeper into his chest to try to get her father's cold body to help her with the blush on her face. “I know I have not been the most understanding father but everything has changed, It take time because I am stubborn, a quality that you inherited from me”. They both laugh “But _I see you_ Brienne, and I will not be the only one. I know”.

Brienne is not so sure of that, and at any other time she would reply that he only says all those things because he is her father but she thinks better and decides not to ruin the moment. Just for today she allows himself to believe his father's words.

…..

Jaenara found in the market a beautiful ancient book with tales about dragons, which according to the merchant was written by descendants of Old Valyria. Although Jaenara doubts the man's word, since they would do anything to sell their products, the book is beautiful and the illustrations seem to come to life. She had never seen a dragon in such detail.

Although Daenerys birthday is tomorrow, Rhaegar organized a dinner tonight for them to have a more private family celebration. She thought that he would not invite them, but her mother informed her in the afternoon that Rhaegar himself spoke to her to invite them.

Some of the tourney guests have started arriving in the capital, but there is no word from her brother yet. Tywin sent her a note this afternoon with a maid, telling her to come to his room at the same time they had their first meeting, the day he made the marriage proposal.

This meeting is probably to discuss the rebellion, as they had not had a chance to speak alone. A part of her is mentally preparing for the possibility that her brother is also at that meeting. It is so easy to fool others by playing the role of Jaenara Rogare but her brother is something totally different. He knows even her most hidden secrets, her gestures, the way her eyes light up when she's angry or the dimple in her cheek when she laughs. Oberyn was her confidant for years, even as her marriage began to unravel, he was the person she wrote to tell how she really felt. She may not tell him everything, but what she said was enough for him to always offer her that they could still run away.

The problem with Oberyn is that he doesn't think things through; he just makes them, so she had to be the voice of reason and remind him that she was the crown prince's wife, she couldn't have escaped even if she had tried. She never had an ally in Kings Landing, her only friend was Ashara and when she left she was absolutely alone.

She spoke to Ghael in the afternoon and he seemed quite in good health, she was surprised that he had no traces of his cold, but the boy assured her that he felt fine and that he had only stayed last night as a precaution. Jaenara has become an expert in reading people, it is a quality that she has had to cultivate to survive and although she is sorry to say it, she cannot help but analyze even the people she trusts, perhaps an unconscious part of her does not trust anyone or it is just habit but she is sure that Ghael is hiding something, and even more, that her father is behind that something. She does not distrust Lysandro but she knows him and knows that when he does not like something, he takes the situation into his own hands.

And so far he doesn't like Kings Landing at all.

Jaenara climbs the last step and sees princess Daenerys looking out one of the windows.

Just the person she was looking for.

"Dany". The young woman turns to look at her and smiles.

"Lady Jaenara”. She runs and hugs her warmly. "I'm glad you're here!... because I need to show someone my gift and Viserys said it was better if I didn't show it to anyone until the tourney was over, but you won't tell anyone if I show it to you, right?...right?” She says so fast that it takes Jaenara a second to understand her. She seems very excited.

"Of course not, it will be our secret”. Jaenara whispers smiling “But I came to look for you because I also wanted to give you my gift before. Although you can show this gift as much as you want”.

"Oh! Well...I'll go get the...my gift and let's go to your room. You better see it there”.

When Dany comes back from her room, she is carrying a kind of cloth bag hanging over her shoulder and it seems to have something very heavy inside, although Jaenara cannot understand what it is. The shape is unlike anything she has ever seen before. "Do you want me to help you?"

"No! She puts her hands protecting the bag. “I mean…I am sorry Lady Jaenara, it is a very precious gift to me and I feel more secure carrying it myself. When I show you what's here, you will understand”. Her whole face lights up and the girl seems to gently stroke the bag. Maybe her brother gave her a pet.

Jaenara, a bit confused, follows Daenerys.

…..

Jaenara took all afternoon to wrap the book with a beautiful fabric that she found between her clothes, she even made a ribbon to decorate it.

"Happy Birthday, dear". She kisses Dany on the cheek and feels unsteady when the young Targaryen grabs her tightly by the neck and hugs her.

"Thank you my Lady”. Excited and with skillful fingers, she unwraps the book from the fabric "It's beautiful” The first few pages are nothing but words, but when the first illustration of a huge golden dragon appears, she screams with excitement and traces the dragon with her fingers. "It seems like you and Visy think alike”.

"Why?" Jaenara arches an eyebrow, confused.

Daenerys doesn't respond but puts the book aside and goes to find the bag she left on the bed "Guess who became a mom this afternoon!" her smile is bright and her eyes squint slightly.

Now Jaenara is sure it is a pet. She walks over to sit next to Dany on the bed when the princess pulls out a beautiful pale cream stone with a streak of gold only once she gets a good look at it, it is not a stone, it is a dragon egg. Jaenara is speechless when she sees her pull out another this one is black with swirls of red and finally an egg deep green with bronze flecks.

“They are fossilized. Viserys say that they are unlikely to hatch, but I think if I give them a lot of love and care for them, they will feel like they have a mother who loves them”. Daenerys whispers, stroking the eggs. In the candlelight, it seems that the colors of these intensify where she touches them.

"Surely your brother deserves at least one named after him”. Jaenara says while still admiring the beautiful eggs.

"This one”. Dany takes the pale cream colored egg and cradles it in her arms "I already name it Viserion”.

"And the others?”

"I don't know yet, but I will carefully read the book you gave me to find the perfect name for my babies”.

Jaenara remembers the dragon egg she owns, the beautiful deep blue one that she has started calling Terrax ever since Rhaegar told her the story of Jaenara Belaerys. Before that story she never thought of naming it, first because it doesn't make sense, it's just a fossilized egg and second because naming it after a loved one, as Daenerys did, would be very painful for her. It would remind her every day that she lost everything.

"I'm going to show you something".

She gets up with the intention of going in search of her egg to show it to the princess when she feels a strange noise at the door.

"Did you hear that?"

"Mmmm?" Daenerys is so focused on her eggs that Jaenara is sure she didn't even hear her question.

The situation strangely reminds her of when she was with her children trapped in Maegor's Holdfast. Her heart races and she feels the beating in every part of her body as she walks towards the door hoping that it is just her imagination, but when she tries to turn the doorknob it is locked.

"Dan-" She can't quite say the girl's name when three burning arrows enter through the window, setting the entire room on fire. The flames spread rapidly closing the entire contour of the room, it is impossible for the fire to spread that way.

It is an elaborate attack; they probably entered her room and impregnated it with some liquid that accelerates the spread of fire.

Dany's scream brings her out of her stupor and Jaenara runs towards her, the girl's eyes are full of tears. "We are going to die?" Her question came out as a sob and Jaenara feels her tremble.

Jaenara tries to say something to reassure her but with the walls on fire, with no way out, it is impossible for them to get out of here. Just wait for someone to notice their absence. "Hey...don't look at anything else, just me" The ceiling begins to fall into pieces so Jaenara leads Dany to the center of the room where the flames have not yet reached.

"It can't end like this”. She mutters. Her eyes see how the flames begin to approach them; everything burns so fast destroying everything in its path. Daenerys has her hugged tightly and her head buried in her chest, every time a heavy piece of roof falls to the ground, Dany screams but her voice muffled in her body, hiding her agony in Jaenara.

If everything had been different, if Rhaegar had not fallen in love with another, Dany would know that they are not just two strangers, Jaenara would have seen her grow up and even if Rhaella had had the same fatal fate, she would have raised her as if she were her own daughter.

Along with Rhaenys and Aegon.

All these years she has not been able to decide if life has given her a second chance or if it is punishment. There is always a part of her days that feels like punishment no matter how happy she is, or at least the happiness that she knows now, which is incomplete, but it is the most she can hope for without her children.

But maybe her destiny was always to die and being saved in the past only delayed the inevitable.

Jaenara concentrates on Dany's body heat, on how scared she must be right now, but more than anything she is sure that this attack was not for her. Who could want to murder such a sweet girl?

Dany is just an unfortunate victim.

“You are just like your mother. Did you know?"

Daenerys looks up and looks at her confused "Did you know my mother?"

"Yes". Her voice is full of emotion but if she is going to die she wants to do it by telling the truth. She wants to die being Daenerys Targaryen's aunt. Jaenara wants her to know that she is not going to die with a stranger and that they will pass into the afterlife as a family. "I saw her for the first time when I arrived at Kings Landing with my brother Oberyn" Jaenara's vision is blurry and Daenerys raises her head with huge purple eyes. The smoke is unbearable and it is difficult for them to breathe. "And I saw her for the last time before she went to Dragonstone, with Viserys and pregnant”.

"I...I don't understand”. Dany coughs and can't stop herself for several seconds.

"Dany..." Jaenara takes her in her arms and tries to hide her head from the smoke; she tries to cover the little girl with her body even though she knows it is impossible. The smoke will find a way to get in. Jaenara thinks she hears screaming outside the room, but she's not sure because she suddenly feels very dizzy.

Jaenara pulls Daenerys to the ground with her still cradling her in her arms. "In Dorne we don't believe in the seven or any God, but I'm sure there must be somewhere we go after we die”. Jaenara coughs and feels the fabric of her dress start to burn. "A place where Aegon and Rhaenys are waiting for me”. She lifts Daenerys face gently. “Now they will not be alone. They will have their aunt and mother with them”.

It is difficult to read the expression of the young Targaryen because of the smoke but she seems to make sense of her words because she tries to open her eyes and she brings her little hand to her cheek. Now Dany understands that she is not Jaenara Rogare. It's Elia Martell. "Aunt E-"

A huge explosion stops the girl's words and the whole place goes up in flames.

…..

It was not until hours later that the people of the Red Keep were able to put out the fire and see what little was left of the room.

There, in the center of it, under heaps of ash were Daenerys and Jaenara along with four little dragons curled up in their naked bodies.


	13. You Promised

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. 
> 
> -From now on it will be mainly Jaenara's pov's, Rhaegar will have two and there will be one from Brienne.  
> -I love The Darkling from Shadow and Bone, that's why I quoted him at the end of the chapter...Seriously....I really love him!! hahaha.  
> -For those who wonder about my family, we are all much better, thanks for your good wishes. :D 
> 
> I had a lot of fun writing this chapter, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

**-Rhaegar, During the fire-**

"Time passes very fast. It seems like yesterday that you and Dany arrived at the Red Keep”. Viserys has always kept his room almost intact, without many personal items. Rhaegar believes that his brother has never looked upon this place as a true home.

"Perhaps for you it has passed quickly, dear brother”. Viserys stops writing and looks at her brother "The truth is that for me it has been ten long years”. He says feigning an expression of exhaustion.

Rhaegar closes the bedroom door and sits across from his younger brother "Dany spoke to me yesterday”.

"I did nothing to influence her to make that decision, if that's what you want to ask”.

"Why do you always have to take my words the wrong way?"

Viserys sighs and settles in the chair. When he was little Rhaegar remembers that his brother reminded him so much of his father, their features were so similar but as he grew older he began to develop more similar features to him. Everyone says that Viserys is the living portrait of Rhaegar when he was younger, although something about him has not changed.

Viserys eyes have always been like his mother's, kind, unable to hide his emotions, which is a gift and a curse at the same time. Rhaegar always knew when his father had hurt his mother just by looking into her eyes.

"What do you want then? I'm busy”.

“Now that you and your sister are going to live together in Dragonstone, I think it is time for you to think about marriage. I do not come here to pressure you or impose my authority to do so. I just want you to think about it”. He takes a deep breath “The High Septon spoke to me yesterday”. He says as an afterthought.

"So? I don't understand what that has to do with me”. Viserys arches an eyebrow.

"He expressed concern that you might want to follow the Targaryen tradition”. Rhaegar begins to speak in High Valyrian. “I don't trust that man; he threatened me and said that if you did, he would turn people against us. According to him, a marriage between brother and sister is an abomination”.

"I think _he_ is an abomination to think that I have other feelings for my eleven-year-old sister”. Viserys says, staring daggers at him.

"Or he can be an observant man”. Rhaegar gives his brother a determined look in hopes that he gets his hint.

"And what has observed _the envoy of the seven_ according to you?" Viserys rests his elbows on the table and interlocks his fingers.

Rhaegar knows they would have to bring it up at some point, only now that his siblings are leaving in just a couple of months, he had to fast-forward the day when he would. "I know that your relationship with your sister is close due to everything you went through together and I also know that you don't see Dany with different eyes”. Rhaegar looks around and decides to speak High Valyrian again. He no longer feels safe in his own home. "But Dany is starting to have _other_ kinds of feelings for you”.

"What are you talking about".

"I think for now it is just a little crush, but if you are going to live together and alone, I think that feeling is going to grow”. Rhaegar says in a firm voice.

Viserys frowns until his face changes as if he finally understands what Rhaegar said "Oh...I get it". The young Targaryen gets up from his chair and walks towards the door opening it "Leave".

"Viserys ..."

“You really think you're going to change my mind. Do you think telling that lie I'll stay at Kings Landing and Dany won't leave your side? How selfish you are Rhaegar”.

“Again you are interpreting what _you_ want to interpret. I wouldn't lie about something like that”. Rhaegar raises his voice. "Even if it's hard for you to accept it, I care about you”.

"You care..." Viserys closes the door and walks towards Rhaegar until he is close to him and shoves him hard. “If you really cared, you wouldn't have run off with your fucking wife and maybe our mother would be alive. You have no idea what we went through while you were with Lyanna Stark on the beaches of Dorne”.

"Then tell me!" Rhaegar responds in frustration “Yell at me! Hit me! I don't know, but does something!”.

Viserys seems determined to take the option of hitting him when someone desperately knocks on the door at the same time as screams are heard outside. The young Targaryen opens the door and finds Ihrra, sobbing.

"What's wrong ... why is everyone running?" Rhaegar hears Viserys say.

"A fire..." He manages to say through tears "In the tower where my lady is staying. She was inside and apparently Princess Daenerys as well”. The woman puts her hands to her face to try to calm her sobs.

He sees Viserys yell something at the woman and run out of the room but Rhaegar is paralyzed for a second, he tries to move but his legs do not respond, it is like having gone back eleven years ago when he walked towards his room and felt that each step he took was like a glass that cut his skin, reaching his heart.

He sees the soldiers and maids passing out of the room and that brings him out of his stupor. But as he runs and gets closer to the tower, he sees how the fire has already consumed most of the structure. It is impossible for someone to survive a fire like that.

…..

What are you supposed to do when you lose hope? It's easy to believe you have it when your faith in it has yet to be tested. But when that moment comes and you realize how hard it is to believe that you will be strong enough to face what's coming, you realize that it only takes a second for everything to change, for reality as you know it turns to ashes.

When you are the king you have to be able to make decisions in hostile situations, because there are thousands of people who depend on you. Over the years you gain experience and have nerves of steel to do what is necessary.

But no one prepares you to watch your sister burn.

When Rhaegar arrived on the scene, everyone looked at him as if he had the answer. But there was nothing to do anymore, the flames consumed so much that the only thing that could be done was fire-breaks so that the rest of the structure and the nearby tower would not burn.

Lysandro Rogare and his wife were both sitting on the damp ground, Jaenara's mother was crying uncontrollably when he arrived at the scene while Lysandro tried to comfort her, but her gaze was fixed on Rhaegar, full of hatred and with promises of revenge. He believes that he has only held back because Rhaegar is also losing someone he loves.

With Viserys it was different; as soon as he saw him he hit him so hard that he fell to the ground. In the midst of pain and helplessness, his brother blamed him for everything, the fire, for bringing the Rogares to Kings Landing. And a part of him thinks his brother is right, Jaenara was being haunted by death and it seems it finally caught up with her.

His wife is by his side putting a cold compress on his left eye, the one that hit Viserys. She is obviously sad but has not said anything, she only hugged him tight once the guards managed to remove Viserys from him.

Everyone at Red Keep is helping to put out the flames and make sure nothing else burns. But what else could burn? Everything that is important to him has already been burned. And although his thoughts are mostly about his sister, a part of him also thinks of Jaenara Rogare and that makes him wonder if he, unconsciously, includes her in _what is important_ to him as well.

Jon has always been a calm but intuitive kid. His hand is intertwined with Rhaegar's and that little gesture has given him a bit of inner peace, every time Rhaegar is about to break, his son gives him a squeeze, returning him to his center. Anchor him to the here and now.

When they manage to control the fire it is early morning, most of the women and children have been sent to their rooms, the soldiers and knights are the only ones who finish putting out the flames, in addition to his brother, who has not stopped helping since they managed to calm him down after his fight with Rhaegar. Lyanna is still by his side, but Jon was sent to his room.

Rhaegar sees Arthur walking towards him, covered in soot and with his clothes ripped. "We believe it is safe to enter the Tower”. He says coughing.

“Rhaegar, I think you should wait a little longer. There was an explosion. You don't know if there can be another”.

The King ignores what the Queen advises him and goes to the place that has taken so much from him in just a few seconds. When he was young and looking for answers in books, Rhaegar read the entire history of the Targaryens and thought how unfortunate they were. How even the best Kings had a life full of tragedies. It is as if the power they possess has cursed them as a way to have balance in the universe.

As if to say, if you want power, you have to give something back for that power.

 _I wish we were different_. It was what he told Elia when she was pregnant with Rhaenys, it was an impossible dream but he still wants it to this day. If they were ordinary people, maybe his feet wouldn't lead him to his sister's grave.

"We have inspected what we can of the place and apparently the explosion that ended up destroying it was due to a wildfire”. Explains Arthur.

"I guess that's another thing to thank my father for”. Aerys wanted her mother to give birth to a girl and constantly harassed her for her inability to conceive a baby. If only he knew that he finally had the girl he wanted so badly and that his paranoia was what ended up killing her.

“You must prepare. What you're going to find here is going to be-”

"I know”. Rhaegar interrupts.

The entire ceiling of the room Jaenara is staying in is destroyed, and what little wood is left under his feet creaks with every step they take. Viserys is already on the scene with some soldiers who are clearing the rubble and trying to see if any of what is left can be salvaged. Rhaegar wanted to help, but Arthur made him see reason. The realm cannot be left without a King, least of all at a time like this.

Ash from the air clings to their clothes and faces, making it difficult to see and breathe. "What was that”. Arthur stops next to him.

"What?" asks the King.

"It is like…" All the men in the room stare at each other. Everyone hears small squeaks, like an animal, coming from under what appears to be the remains of a wall.

“It could be the Baelor. Lately he was around this place a lot”. Rhaegar says referring to Rhaenys cat that still lives in Red Keep.

"No...it's not Baelor" Viserys says to himself and Rhaegar wonders what his brother managed to decipher because he sees him jump over the place where the sounds are heard and to pull out the pieces of wood like crazy. "Please let it be them”. His voice gets low and seems desperate.

Arthur and Rhaegar look at each other confused but kneel on the ground to help Viserys. The three men begin to clear the debris and Rhaegar begins to hear the sounds much clearer and notices that there seems to be more than one animal underneath.

"Shit”.

"Did you get burned?" Rhaegar asks without looking at Arthur, still concentrating on removing the debris.

"No...something bit me"

Viserys stops and fixes his gaze on Arthur's hand. "They hatched…..Dany…"

"What are you talking about Vi-?" Rhaegar is interrupted by something touching his knee. When he looks, he realizes that this something is a hand. One very similar in size to Daenerys. The King feels so desperate that he begins to push the pieces of the wall with his legs asking for help from the soldiers.

The king gasps when he sees what's below. Beneath the ashes and trash that most of the things in the room have been transformed into, they find Daenerys and Jaenara with four little dragons.

Daenerys is awake but seems a bit disoriented, unlike Jaenara, who seems unconscious. Three of the dragons are attached to his sister and a blue one is wrapped around the young Rogare's leg.

Everything is chaos after that. Viserys begins to shout orders to the soldiers and to Arthur as he takes off his torn tunic so that his sister can cover herself with it, once he finishes dressing her, he caresses his sister's face, kissing her forehead gently, as if it broke just by touching her. Rhaegar realizes that his brother does not seem surprised like he and Arthur by the dragons, so he assumes that he must have given them to her. Viserys leans into Daenerys ear and says something the king cannot hear and then stands up so Rhaegar can hug her to.

He can't stop looking at her, her body has some superficial wounds but she has no burns, and she is as beautiful as he remembered her. While the people put out the fire, the King had thought about the last time he had seen his sister happy and decided that this was how he wanted to remember her but now, that he sees her in his arms, that memory did not do her justice.

Rhaegar looks at Jaenara Rogare, the young woman does not seem to show signs of waking up and without thinking too much he slides his hand into her. Nothing looks different about her, Arthur took off his clothes to cover her, but her legs are exposed and Rhaegar can't help but look where she has the scar from the horse accident she told him about, the one that caused her to lose her children.

The scar makes him return strangely to the past, to the wound that his wife had in her leg, _your father's latest act of cowardice_ , was what she said when she showed it to him.

Now that he's looking at it closely, they aren't just the alike. They are the same.

"Am I a mom?" Daenerys says under her breath, barely loud enough for Rhaegar to hear.

"Yes, darling. A beautiful mother of dragons”. He smiles at her.

As Rhaegar cradles his sister in his arms, he watches the little dragons. One of them climbs up Daenerys body until he reaches the place where Rhaegar has his arm. It is deep green and it seems a little smaller than the others. The dragon's eyes are dark and it look at him curiously.

Hundreds of years ago, magic disappeared from Westeros and with it the dragons. He had never seen one; he had only seen illustrations in his books. At that moment when he was younger he thought about what it would be like to see a real one but now that he has four in front of him a feeling of bewilderment invades him. He sees the mistrust in the eyes of the soldiers who are helping them and knows that not everyone will take the news that his sister has three dragons as something to celebrate.

Dragons in Westeros are a sign of Conquest, Destruction and Death.

…..

"How is Dany?" Lyanna sits next to Rhaegar on the bed and takes his hand.

"Good". He responds in a harsh tone and feels her tense next to him. “Sorry, this whole situation is…very overwhelming. I didn't want to speak to you in that tone”. Or maybe he wanted to, because deep down, he mistrusts that she was the one who planned the attack. It wouldn't be the first time.

After a pause she responds. "Your sister has three dragons”. She continues but sounds frustrated. "You know how dangerous that is."

"What are you talking about".

"How dangerous it is for our son”. Rhaegar feels like he's been punched in the stomach.

"You're really thinking about that after everything that just happened”. He rips his hand from hers, an edge of anger in his voice. "My sister almost died and what matters to you is the threat Dany can be to him? Because she has dragons?

“I am thinking of the future! In what can happen”. Lyanna's temper rises. “At first we shared that vision, but now it is our biggest difference. You just want to live in the present”. Her eyes go sad and she looks at her hands that are in her lap. "Or in the past”. She takes a few seconds to compose herself. “Do you think if you gave small folks the option to choose a king, it would be Jon? No, to them even Viserys is a better candidate than our son and now that Daenerys has brought back _the glorious Targaryen years_ , they might even want a Queen”. The latter is said in a sarcastic tone.

 _What could Lyanna do for their son?_ Rhaegar doesn't know if he wants to have the answer to that question. “But people don't choose. Jon is the heir to the throne and will be king”. He says, hoping to sound confident in his words.

"You do not understand!" She stands up angrily. "I'm worried about him and you should support me on that or at least do something about it!"

"And what according to you would be what I should do”. He looks up with betrayed eyes. "Kill the dragons?....or my siblings?" Rhaegar nearly _beg_ Lyanna to speak her true thoughts.

“I did not say that. I would never think of hurting anyone like that”.

 _Lies_ is something Rhaegar expects from everyone but his wife or so he believed.

When Rhaegar doesn't respond, he continues “Daenerys has three dragons, she will only be a rider on one of them. Why don't we try to get one of the two remaining to be bonded to Jon?” She kneels in front of him and takes his face in her hands "If Jon manages to get one of them to have a bond with him he will have a better position when he takes the throne”.

“You talk like Jon is going to take the throne tomorrow. Why Lyanna? Do you expect me to die soon?

"What...I don't-" she says confused.

"Leave". He knows that he sounds more and more annoyed with her with each passing second, but he can't believe these are her thoughts at a time like this: “I want to see my sister. And I want to stop listening to nonsense”.

Lyanna radiates anger from her position beside the bed "Rhaegar, I swear if you walk out that door now-"

Rhaegar couldn't help himself; he felt a sudden rush of anger. "What! Are you going to tell Lady Alarra to send a child to my room with a concoction…the Red Death perhaps?"

Lyanna took a shaky breath and stood up. "Rhaegar let me explain…".

Anger leaves Rhaegar and is replaced by sadness and melancholy. "Who are you?...Who are we?.... because I don't know what happened to us along the way, when we became _this_ ”

"In _this_?" Lyanna feels her chest tighten.

"In two people who share a life but are not able to tell each other the truth”. A relationship breaks down because at some point both people have some blame for small fractures, until it becomes irreversible.

Rhegar sees many emotions on his wife's face and on another occasion he would have decided to stay and try to solve their problems but this time there is something different. As if they were at a point where a decision has to be made. Either they fight together like so many times before to mend their hearts or they just let it go and become another loveless marriage.

The answer was always clear to Rhaegar, but now he's not so sure he wants to continue building his path alongside her.

When he leaves the room and closes the door he can hear Lyanna sobbing behind it, it hurts him to hear her like that but if he enters the room now then she will think that he is hesitant to make decisions.

And Rhaegar is realizing that many times in the past he hesitated to make the right decisions.

…..

**-Jaenara-**

_The smell of pine is the first thing that Jaenara can distinguish; it is strange because she does not remember having been in a place with that aroma before falling asleep. Her eyes flutter open and when she moves them she sees soldiers running around her but she does not hear them speak or even the sound of their boots on the ground, she hears nothing but silence around her, although she knows there is chaos where she is. Her throat feels dry, like she's been screaming for hours, but she doesn't really remember doing it. Jaenara makes the effort to sit up and realizes that she is in the Red Keep, in a corridor to be precise, but it looks more like the Keep from years ago, when she was Elia Martell and lived here as the future Queen of the Seven Kingdoms._

_The soldiers are still running around her, but no face looks familiar and what is even weirder is that no one seems to notice that she is sitting on the ground, almost as if she is invisible._

_Jaenara feels disoriented and gets up, her legs feel weak and she wonders how long she was on the floor without anyone helping her. "Excuse me?” She tells one of the men, but he ignores her and continues talking to another man. Jaenara tries to listen to what they say but the only thing that she still distinguishes is the smell of pine._

_Nothing makes sense, from what she remembers, the rebellion hasn't taken place yet and from what she can see it's like there's a war going on right now._

_Jaenara raises her hand to touch the man on the shoulder and make him look at her when she realizes that her fingers are shattered "What…." Her eyes look at both hands and both are in very bad shape but she feels no pain, she doesn't know how she got those horrible wounds._

_She looks around confused by the situation when she sees a familiar face. Jon Connington comes walking directly towards her. But her father's spies informed her that he was dead, it is not possible that he is here._

_"We have to move faster before Robert's supporters come for us”._

_“What?”._

_"We have to move faster before Robert's supporters come for us”. Jon repeats the same thing but doesn't move, just stares at her. Jaenara looks down and realizes that he has a wound on his abdomen._

_"Nothing makes sense”. She mutters. Her heart is pounding so hard, as if she has run miles, although she does not know if it is from nerves or fear. In the middle of her internal monologue Jon takes Jaenara's hand and places on it the necklace that Oberyn gave her on her wedding day and as soon as the jewel touches her hand, raindrops begin to fall on them, transforming in seconds into a huge storm._ _How is it possible that it rains inside the Red Keep? Maybe she's dead, it's the only option where she could see Jon by her side._

_"Where I am?" She asks._

_"They are dead...all dead," he replies._

_"What are you talking about? I don't understand”. Despite the strangeness of the situation, Jaenara finds the words the knight speaks strangely familiar._

_“She didn't want anyone to really die just for the prince to think that, but you can't always have what you want. Don't you think Ser Jon?”._

_"What a prince...what”. Jaenara stutters without understanding what the man is trying to tell her, even more so by calling her by his own name. The rain has intensified and she feels mud under her feet. "Jon, I don't understand anything”._

_He gestures "I'm sorry" with his lips at the same time that Jaenara feels that the ground begins to swallow her, she loses her balance and begins to kick and scream for help but the man stands there doing nothing to help her._

Suddenly, Jaenara's eyes snap open and she sits scared on the bed, screaming. It seems like someone is next to her trying to talk to her, but she just raises her hands to look at them closely. Both hands have no trace of recent injuries.

"Jaenara…" The young woman's eyes look around her and she sees her mother with tears in her eyes and a maid with a jug of water and what appear to be compresses.

"Mother?" Larra Rogare does not say anything, only draws her to her body and hugs her tightly, Jaenara feels her tears on her neck but she still feels trapped in what was apparently a dream.

Larra sobbed "We were so worried...we thought you would never wake up”. Jaenara’s mouth opened but no words came out.

Her mother turns away from her and looks at the maid. "Can you tell my husband that our daughter has woken up, please?" Once she has left the room, Larra embraces her again but this time it is just an excuse to be able to speak into her ear. “People have asked us many questions…the Rogare family have never been dragon riders. I think some are even beginning to suspect that you are not our daughter”.

"What are you talking about?" Jaenara asks confused.

Larra separates from her and puts her hands on her shoulders. "You don't remember anything that happened?"

Jaenara tries to think about the last thing she remembers "The fire...." She looks out the window remembering how everything started to catch fire quickly and that she thought she was going to die. Fear crossed Jaenara's face when she remembered Dany. "Princess Daenerys...is she okay?"

Larra nods "She was awake when they found you both...you; on the other hand, honey...you've been in bed for four days”. Jaenara closed her eyes and held her breath. "My dear, a lot has happened in these four days of absence”.

Jaenara suddenly remembers what she spoke to Daenerys in her last moments, when she thought they were both going to die and gasped. "I have to talk to her..." She says frantically and trying to get up but Larra takes her by the arms and prevents her from doing so, which causes the young Rogare to start moving desperately. "Jaenara...stop!"

"It's important, mother...it's a life and death situation”.

"Listen to me". Her mother rarely uses a firm voice like she does now. “I don't know why you need to speak to the princess, but I promise I will have her come to your room as soon as possible. Now we have other things to worry about". Says her mother, the look in her eyes determined. "For example, your engagement is already known to everyone”.

"What...but how?"

"The King wanted to see you and we weren't sure it was a good idea considering the circumstances”. The circumstances that Larra speaks of remain a mystery to Jaenara. “Tywin was at the door and wanted to visit you too, so your father came up with the brilliant idea of telling Rhaegar that he should check with your future husband first. If he agreed”. Jaenara's brain is racing trying to figure out the situation. “Tywin _explained_ to the King that he had spoken with the maester and that he had told him that as long as you did not wake up, it was best if you received as few visitors as possible. Only close people”. From the expression on her mother's face, Jaenara can tell that Tywin never spoke to the maester. He only said it to buy time. At least her future husband is good for something.

"But I don't understand...why so much secrecy”. Jaenara asks still very confused.

Larra takes a few seconds to respond. "Something happened that day...you really don't remember anything?"

"No, what happened?"

"Jaenara...the dragon egg your father gave you, along with the three that Daenerys had...they all hatched”.

“What?” Jaenara feels her throat tighten.

“House Targaryen and House Rogare now possess dragons. The first in hundreds of years”.

…..

After her mother explained exactly what happened or at least what she knows, her father came to the room and between the three of them they evaluated the future. It is strange to re-plan thinking about the different scenarios that can occur; they did not do it a long time ago. Not since Jaenara decided she wanted to go back to Kings Landing. She told them what happened to Daenerys and, despite her father's discontent for being so careless, between the three of them they thought about what might happen if the princess tells the truth.

In the end they came to the conclusion that it was best to wait. If Rhaegar already knew the truth, they would know, after all, even in the keep, his father has had spies for years.

Before they left the room for her to rest, Larra asked her if she wanted to see the dragon but Jaenara refused. She still does not assimilate that the egg that just a few days ago she called Terrax and to which she sometimes told her secrets in silent whispers, no longer exists and in its place there is now a supposedly extinct creature.

At some point, Jaenara managed to get out of bed and walked to the window. Everything seems so different from four days ago, the view she has now is of the east side of the Keep and her old room instead had a view of the garden. This one has a rather bleak view for her liking.

From the window she can only see the dark.

Jaenara is suddenly surprised with her own thoughts, she feels that the darkness surrounds her. She has never been particularly afraid of it, but now, at this moment, she fears that the darkness in which her heart is, the one that has taken hold of her during the bitter years that she has spent in exile ended up destroying the last remaining traces of Elia Martell, of that woman she was before. It's a strange thought, even more so at a time like this, where her least concern should be that.

"My lady”. The voice is Ihrra's, so Jaenara doesn't bother to lie down again and instead continues to gaze out the window, wrapping her arms around her as she ponders her future.

"Come in".

"My lady. You have a visitor”. Curious about the maid's tone, Jaenara looks back and sees Rhaegar next to Ihrra.

"Your grace". Jaenara doesn't even try to curtsy. She feels too exhausted for that. Besides, from what she knows, he might even be here to recriminate all her lies. "Thank you Ihrra. You can leave us”.

Ihrra bows to both of them, closing the door behind her, leaving them alone. Neither seems to want to start the conversation until Rhaegar starts. "It seems to me, my lady, that you have a magnet for trouble”. A smile spreads across his face and Jaenara immediately understands that Dany hasn't spoken to him.

"I think I have a magnet for death”. She turns her gaze to the window. There is so much truth in that sentence, Aegon and Rhaenys are proof of it.

Jaenara hears Rhegar approaching her, his steps are heavy, as if he is shuffling. "Well". He whispers next to her. "I'm glad you didn't die”. He says, as if he really believes it.

Jaenara can hear the rage in her own voice. "It doesn't seem like it. Lately your attitude towards me, your grace, has been quite strange. One cold day the other warm, almost as if you don't know what to do with me”. She says, remembering how he ignored her during the dinner he and her father organized for her birthday.

She hears him sigh. "You make me question everything I believed in”.

"What". Jaenara did not expect an answer like that, with surprised eyes she turns to look at Rhaegar but he keeps looking into the darkness.

“If I am honest with you now, Lady Jaenara. You promise to forget everything I tell you”. Now Rhaegar looks at her. His eyes are two violet storms in the dim candlelight. "You promise?" He repeats urgently, needing her to reassure him that she will.

With this _new Rhaegar_ she is always curious to know what he has in mind. She can't read him like she did when they were husband and wife.

Jaenara nods.

"Before you arrived, I had forgotten what it was like to be Rhaegar, not the King or a knight; I had forgotten what it was to be just me”. Jaenara swallowed hard. "I think of you when I wake up and when I fall asleep, either to curse you for making me feel this way or simply to understand why I feel this way and the more I think of you, the more I keep the ghosts of the past awake in my mind”.

"Stop". Jaenara began to feel a small tendril of panic; this is not supposed to happen. This was not part of the plan.

"Let me finish”. His eyes look desperate but she sees him take a deep breath and then keep talking. “You promised that you would forget it. I'll do it too. We both will. Just let me say it once like we're the only people that matter”.

Rhaegar hasn't even tried to put his hands to her face. She believes that he fears she will escape from the bubble they are in, but he fears even more that if he touches her, she will reject him. "You give me such a scary feeling”. Jaenara felt her heart clench and her throat tightened. "And I'm terrified”. Rhaegar's shoulders that were tense a second ago have slowly relaxed. As if with every word that comes out of his mouth he frees his soul. “I want you so bad that sometimes I don't know what to do with myself and I'm not just talking about lust. I want you even more when you fight me for what you believe is the right thing to do. He looks...thoughtful but determined. “I'm trying to hide it…even if I'm bad at it”.

Jaenara starts to feel a headache, but her eyes held his "You are hurting me with your words” She whispers.

"You are hurting me too”. He said, his voice strangled.

“That is quite hypocritical of you. I've never given you reasons to think that way about me”. She says defensively.

“I know, but I can't help how I feel. Do you think that if I could I would not get this feeling out of me?” Jaenara closed her eyes, suddenly everything seemed overwhelming. "Is it so wrong? Have such a strong feeling?" She feels her blood burn with every word. "I'd _beg you_ if that's what you wanted from me”.

"I do not want anything from you”. Breathing becomes increasingly difficult for her. "I just want you to go”.

Rhaegar does not respond to her words but she knows that he is still there, next to her, she can feel his eyes on her. "Do you know why Tywin didn't go to your birthday dinner?"

She shakes her head. "I was jealous. That afternoon I found out about your engagement to him, so I made up that I needed him to read and give me his opinion on an urgent document for the next day”. She bit her lip to calm the whirlwind of emotions she feels right now. Anger is the one that predominates but there are also others, others that she refuses to name. “I know it was a meaningless decision. That's not going to prevent your marriage to him, but I wanted to be selfish just for that night and have you all to myself”. She feels his breath on her face and realizes that now he is close to her, still not touching her but so close that he only has to take a step for their entire bodies to touch.

"Are you going to offer me to escape together?" She opens her eyes and tries to put all the anger she feels in her gaze. “It's what you do when a woman catches your eye, right? You did it with Lyanna and now you want to do it with me. I can't believe that this King in front of me is the same one loved by his people. If they knew how fragile the heart of their King is and how easy it is for him to seek refuge in other places that do not belong to him, perhaps they would not love you so much”.

Of all the reactions Jaenara expected from Rhaegar, that perhaps her words ignited his anger or his remorse, she certainly didn't expect him to wrap his arms around her body and hug her burying his face into her neck. She is so bewildered that she stands still, not moving a muscle. "My heart has belonged to only one woman”. His lips brush her neck as he speaks. “And it had never sought refuge with anyone. Up to now".

From the day in her room when they both argued over the first contract that Jaenara offered Rhaegar that he wasn't that close to her and even back then he was _just_ close, not completely enveloping her. The smell of his skin is the same as it was years ago; _is that even possible?_ “I cannot change the past. But I can avoid making the same mistakes. That is why I am telling you this now, just once. I will never say anything _inappropriate_ to you again, my lady. I promise". It feels so good to be hugged this way after so many years, that feeling of _nostalgia_ is what she believes prompts her to pull her arms out from between them. She takes one towards Rhaegar's back and the other places it on his neck stroking his hair there. The new contact makes her skin burn under her nightgown.

 _“Everything i know tells me that i should walk away”_ she thinks, but right now a part of her wants to stay. And that's the part that scares her the most. Shame is ringing inside her head.

"Jaenara...." The way he said her name came out as a sigh of agony and ignited something inside her that she can't explain. But it feels like slowly falling into an abyss. "Don't make me run. Just for tonight”.

Rhaegar hurt her so much in the past, he was not the person who murdered her children, but he was the person who caused everything. He ran away with another woman, who sits on the throne that should have been hers. So Jaenara can't understand what she's still doing in his arms, because she hasn't moved away from him. Perhaps her near-death experience left her with more sequelae than she thought. Or perhaps exhaustion has clouded her judgment. Whatever it is, this hug feels like the last, like two lovers who will never see each other again and even though they know their relationship was doomed, they want to have these last moments together.

Rhaegar takes a deep breath like he wants to say something else, but regrets it at the last minute and the air from his mouth warms Jaenara's neck, making her shiver in his arms.

"My lady. We bring water for your bath”. Announce Ihrra from outside the room. God bless her lady-in-waiting, she is sure that Ezzara is with her, that's why she is warning that they are outside. So Lyanna's spy doesn't see her with Rhaegar. It seems that Ihrra is smarter than she thought.

Rhaegar takes one last breath and releases her from his arms. "This room has a secret passage next to the fireplace”.

"Alright”. She says, out of breath.

"You will forget, right?" Despite his words, Jaenara can notice a hint of hope in them. Inside, he expects another response from her, although he knows that the right thing to do is forget.

"As if it never happened”. Jaenara took a deep breath, calming herself.

Rhaegar's eyes narrowed, absorbing her answer. He finally nods and walks over to the fireplace. That was the deal; she doesn't understand why he secretly expected something else from her.

Jaenara is waiting for him to leave when she sees him stop in front of the passage, resting his hand on the wall. He appears to be debating a decision but she cannot see his face because his back is to her. Jaenara finds herself frowning. What else could he have to say? Everything is already said between them.

She sees how he turns around and rushes to get to where she is. Jaenara's eyes widen when she feels Rhaegar's lips collide with hers. The press of his mouth is insistent, desperate but it's just that, a press. They look like two inexperienced teenagers having their first kiss hidden in the woods, both bold enough to sneak out to kiss but too shy to take the initiative and transform that press into a passionate kiss.

When he removes his mouth from hers, he rests his forehead against her. "You are not mine but a part of me is yours...I let myself...want you and for that, I am sorry”. His words are like a brush fire that burns her soul.

Jaenara refuses to open her eyes until she hears Rhaegar leave the room and when she slowly opens her eyes, the situation hits her hard like a great storm.

She feels the burden on her.

…..

After her ladies-in-waiting helped her bathe and left, her thoughts kept her from sleeping. Instead, she snuggled into the corner of the bed trying to make sense of her life. Before the birth of dragons everything seemed so clear. But now she feels like a scared child who hasn't even been able to see the dragon despite her parents' attempts to at least see it from afar. They say it is a beautiful midnight blue.

On the other hand, what happened with Rhaegar puzzles her to the point of insanity. A weak person cannot lead and at that time she was weak. It is an irony of destiny that he now has these feelings for her and that when she had wanted that, he decided that she was not enough. Jaenara squeezes her hands together, buried her nails in the soft skin and drew in a shocked breath when she felt the skin break, the years have passed but he continues to drag her in spirals of insecurity and pain.

Jaenara wants to feel the delicate rays of the morning sun on her face but it seems that today will be a cloudy day. In Essos there are hardly any days when the clouds take over the sky, it is what she likes the most about living there. That reminds her of Home. Kings Landing, on the other hand, constantly reminds her of the dark times, it had been very difficult for her to adjust and when she finally achieved the balance she was looking for, life puts a new obstacle for her.

 _"I am Jaenara Rogare, I am the heir to a great empire, I am a mother, I am a daughter, I am a sister and nothing will bring me down”._ That is the mantra that she repeats as she dresses to go out in search of her future husband. Now more than ever she needs to make sure that nothing can destroy her hard-won.

Outside her room everything is quiet; it is so early that not even the maids have gotten up to start their work. The only people in the hall are the guards, and from the looks on their faces, even they seem to be losing the battle against sleep.

A girl's voice reaches her ears, she appears to be no more than 8 or 9 years old, and she is chatting animatedly with someone. Jaenara doesn't remember hearing that voice before, but somehow she is drawn to it.

"And one of them is as black as the night in Starfall”. Jaenara hears the girl say, as she approaches the place of origin of the voices.

"I bet it's as black as your grandfather's old heart”.

She giggles "Uncle Oberyn!" Jaenara gasps and stops as if an invisible wall is forcing her to. The tournament was scheduled for four days ago but due to everything that happened it was moved to the day after tomorrow. In her mind she knew he was already here, but she had forced herself not to think about it, she didn't want to plan anything. She decided that it would be best if her encounter with him was spontaneous.

"What!" she can hear the amusement in his voice. “You know it's true, dear Elia. Your grandfather already smells like death a long time ago. I don't know why he still _delights us_ with his presence”. Her mouth fell open, the girl called her uncle, so she is not her brother's daughter. Maybe from Doran? A niece. She closed her eyes and savored the moment.

“Don't be rude Uncle Oberyn! Grandpa always gives me piggyback rides”. Jaenara walks over to where she hears the voices and sees two figures sitting on the floor. In the dark it is a bit difficult for her to see their features but she is sure it is Oberyn and the girl. Oberyn and Elia.

“Piggyback rides? Dammit! What does your grandpa eat? At this rate I will turn to sand before him”.

The girl gasps "My mother says that word is inappropriate”.

"Which one? Grandpa?" His brother feigns innocence.

Jaenara can't help but laugh, she covers her mouth with her hand, but it's too late. Oberyn and the girl look their way. What little shadows reveal is exactly how she remembered it. Slowly, she removes her hand from her mouth and blinks, trying to compose herself. She is Jaenara Rogare, that is the person Oberyn should see, not his sister. Although in her heart a part of her wants to hear him say her name. Her real name, not the one she's used for years.

She longs for him to say her name. Just once.

"Prince Oberyn, I presume?" She says walking towards the two.

"Lady Jaenara Rogare, I presume?" Oberyn mockingly repeats.

She smiles "And who is this beautiful young lady?" The girl has pale blue eyes and raven-hair.

"Elia Dayne." She says proudly. _Ashara and Barristan's daughter._ Think Jaenara.

"The pleasure is all mine Lady Elia”.

Jaenara stops looking at Elia and turns her gaze to Oberyn. Their eyes meet and for a second she thinks he sees recognition in them, but as soon as she sees it, it disappears.

Oberyn takes Elia's hand and she sees him kneel in front of the girl.

"Little sun, why don't you go back to the room and then I'll find you to go to breakfast? Elia nods and gives him a hug before running to the end of the hall where she enters a room. Oberyn waits until he sees her disappear inside.

"So...are you the woman who is saving the Lannister name from ruin?" He says with a playful smile but Jaenara knows her brother better than anyone. She is sure that he is trying to find out her reasons for having an alliance with them.

“A woman needs a name to do business at Kings Landing. The Lannister name will give me what I need”. She shrugs. “People don't trust foreigners like us, Prince Oberyn”. She locks her gaze on his face. "Sacrifice is a poorly valued word, don't you think?" We all make more than one sacrifice in our lives to get what we want”.

"True. Although men sacrifice very little in this place. Just to have a cock they already have a lot”. Oberyn says with a thoughtful expression. "Too bad, in Dorne that doesn't matter. We follow a princess or a prince alike, a custom of our Rhoynar roots”. He extends his arm for her to take it. "Your mother is Rhoynar, right?" Jaenara nods taking his arm. “Larra Rogare was the name of the wife of Viserys ll, although she did not manage to be with him when he ascended to the throne. She abandoned him”. He says as he guides her down the hallway of the Keep. "She worshiped Lyseni gods and the prudes at Kings Landing believed they were sinful and sexual gods”. He grins "My point, my lady, is that she could not adapt to the ways of Westeros and even if she did, I do believe that the puritans of this land would not have accepted her anyway”.

Jaenara realizes that he led her to a window from where the Tower of the Hand can be seen. "The name Lannister does not assure you that the people in this snake-filled hole will trust you, Lady Jaenara”. He approaches her “Take my sister as an example. In Dorne she walked among vipers and none would bite her. At Kings Landing, she found herself surrounded by a hungry dragon and wolf”. Her breath catches in her throat.

"I am not your sister”. Even saying it makes her shiver. 

"No. You are not” He leans closer to her face, tucking a lock of her short blonde hair behind her ear, to which he leans in to whisper. "But maybe you find yourself surrounded by lions and that makes me wonder, what is the real reason why the famous Jaenara Rogare put herself in such a difficult situation?” She swallowed hard. “Especially so that you are condemning your life to an old lion. When you can definitely aspire to something better”. He says looking at her appreciatively. She doesn't blame him because he doesn't know she's his sister, But it's very rare for your brother to look at you that way.

“I am broadening my horizons, Prince Oberyn. I want every woman, child and man to know who Jaenara Rogare is and the power behind that name”. To her own ears, she sounds like an ambitious bitch, but it is necessary as long as she cannot speak to her brother about the truth. “But my aspirations are not for the highest. I like the freedom that being the head of the Rogare Bank gives me”. Too much ambition would be dangerous for him, so she hopes to assure him that she is not ambitious for the crown. For now.

Oberyn seems to be contemplating her answer carefully. His black eyes seem to be searching under her skin for _whom_ she is loyal. _But who am I loyal to?_ She thinks. Once she thought that it was with Dorne and that is why she married Rhaegar, then she thought that her loyalty was for her children and that is why she planned her revenge and once she found out about the rebellion plans of her brothers she placed her loyalty in them. But now that she thinks about it, shouldn't her loyalty be to herself? With what she considers fair.

“I hope to see you again soon, Lady Jaenara. At your wedding, maybe?...to make sure your aspirations stay where they are now”. He takes her hand and kisses her knuckles. "See you at breakfast”. With a last glance his brother walks towards the room where little Elia entered.

Jaenara touches her knuckles where her brother kissed her. Oberyn is very different from how she remembers it, but maybe it's because she, now, is a stranger to him, someone he clearly doesn't trust. “ _A single lie discovered is enough to create doubt in every truth expressed”_ It's what her mother always said, not Larra, but she and Oberyn's mother. Jaenara wonders if once her brother knows who she really is, his love for her as a sister will outweigh how deceived he will feel by her for having lied to him all these years.

Before going to the Tower of the Hand to speak with Tywin she decides to return to her room.

…..

Jaenara had heard the sounds it made under the silk her mother covered the cage with. She had seen Larra feed it cooked meat because she hadn't wanted to do it herself. _In Dorne our blood is fire_ , it's a common saying, but even if that were true, she does not understand why the egg hatched. Her blood must barely have a hint of Targaryen in it, not enough to earn Aerys Targaryen's respect in the past, but enough to awaken a dragon? Life takes unexpected paths.

She reaches her hand to the silk cloth and hears it move inside the cage, almost as if it senses her presence nearby. Jaenara shakes her head and pulls out the silk cloth.

Her mother described the dragon as midnight blue and she was not wrong, it is a very dark shade of blue with black eyes. He is restless inside the cage and the sounds he makes now are very different from what she had heard him make before.

It seems it is...whimpering.

Jaenara brings her index finger to the cage and slowly inserts it through the bars. The little dragon backs up and makes a curious sound while looking at her. He approaches her hand, analyzing it and when he gets close enough to touch it, he emits a soft growl and snuggles into her finger.

Jaenara laughed softly "Hi". She doesn't know why she was so scared to see it, it looks like a strange little bird but it is beautiful. And now it is hers to care for and guide it.

Like a son.

"Do you want to get out of this ugly cage?" She can swear it understood what she was saying because it is starting to fidget again. "So impatient”. As soon as the dragon hears the click of the cage door, its movements stop.

"Come". The little animal tilts its head as if asking, what are you talking about? Jaenara tries again with High Valyrian “Māzigon lēda nyke” (come with me).

The creature walks on clumsy legs until it catches up to her and climbs onto the hand she offers him. Jaenara places it on her shoulder. There is no way she is calling it Terrax, as fond of the name as she was, it was practically Rhaegar's idea. And the least she wants now is to have something that reminds her of him.

There was a book that she and Doran loved when they were little, they were just children's stories without much sense but they had a favorite character. The heroine's horse.

“My little Bloodaxe”. Jaenara says as she sees her reflection in the mirror in the corner of the room. The dragon spreads its wings over her shoulder emitting all kinds of sounds. "Do you like it? How about we go see my future husband together?" She caresses the dragon under it jaw and it purrs in her ear.

The guards who see her go by look at her and her dragon in amazement, but there is also something else in their eyes.

Fear.

 _"Good"_ she thinks. _"Fear me, for a new era is coming”._ Jaenara looks at her dragon and smiles as she walks. _“You and I are going to change the world”._


End file.
